by Beth Michele
She tilts her head, the empathy in her eyes like a warm cloak. “Do you want to know what I think, sweetie? First the dream, and now this—I think you’re scared. You said you wanted this to be something, and now it is, and you’re terrified.”
“But what is it?” I question, my voice small as I beg Georgia for an explanation, for reassurance, for something.
“Only you can answer that. You gotta dig deep.” She brings a hand up to the corner of my eye, thumbing away a tear. “Be still and know.” She smiles. “That’s what my yoga teacher says anyway.”
“Why are you always the level-headed one in this friendship? Like when you talked me out of sucker-punching Tommy Maloney for trying to steal my lunch in sixth grade. What would I do without you?”
Her lips twist. “You’d be in some serious deep shit.”
I sniffle-laugh. “You’re right about that.”
She hands me a tissue. “Now clean up that godforsaken mess on your lips. You don’t want Jace looking like a clown after he kisses you.”
“Speaking of kissing…” I dab at my mouth. “How’s the dynamic duo?”
“They’re okay.” She steps up to the mirror, giving her makeup a quick once-over before strolling out of the bathroom. “Honestly, they’re both sweet but kind of boring. You know I do better with men who are a bit more rough around the edges.”
“I know.” I frown at her back as I follow her out. “The ones who don’t treat you well.”
“True, but the sex is phenomenal.”
Our laughter bellows all the way out the door.
Be still and know.
Georgia’s words stick in my brain long after our conversation, long after we’ve arrived at the restaurant. When do they leave my head? The moment Jace walks in the door and my heart thumps so loud it drowns out all coherent thought.
He spots me at the table right away, a warm smile on his lips and a sparkle in the blue of his eyes. The expression tells me he’s happy to see me, says maybe, like me, he couldn’t wait another minute. I suppose the kiss he plants on my lips doesn’t hurt either.
I grin against his mouth. “Hi.”
“Hi yourself.”
Georgia clears her throat, prompting us to remember we’re not alone. “Introductions?”
“Georgia, this is Jace. Jace, this is…Georgia.”
He takes the seat beside me and reaches for my hand. “It’s great to finally meet you, Georgia.”
“And you as well. Lily talks about you all the time,” she says, and I kick her under the table.
“Ouch.”
Jace assesses me, amusement pulling at his lips. “Does she?”
Thankfully, Chaz shows up right then, a perfectly timed distraction. “Hey, you guys want to go somewhere else? This place sucks.”
Georgia and Jace both glare at Chaz. The difference? Georgia looks at him like he’s a bug she wants to crush under her shoe. That’s Georgia, and you either love her or hate her. Fortunately for me, I loved her at first sight, which also happened to be the moment she shared her Skittles with me. “I’m sorry, who are you exactly?”
My foot just happens to land on Georgia’s.
“Ouch!”
Chaz shoves a hand through his unruly hair. “I’m Chaz, Jace’s brother. Who the hell are you?”
“Chaz.” Jace’s firm tone does little to end the verbal standoff.
“Well, Chaz.” Georgia bares her teeth. “This is where we’re eating. However, if you’d like to dine elsewhere, I, for one, will not stop you.”
Chaz accepts her challenge, not only sitting down at the table but occupying the seat right beside her. There’s a fire in his gaze I recognize all too well. Georgia tends to have that effect on people.
“Yeah, I’m really glad we did this, aren’t you?” I say in a singsong voice, hoping to diffuse the tension. Silence descends over the table, but thankfully it doesn’t last long before Georgia and Jace laugh, and even Chaz’s lips verge on a smile.
“All right. Let’s eat some shitty food,” Georgia shouts out, and the waitress sends us a sharp look as she approaches the table. It doesn’t help that we’re all laughing when she arrives.
Once the ice is broken, we actually have a nice time. Chaz and Georgia manage to get along—just barely—and Chaz has loads of hilarious stories in his arsenal. The food, contrary to what he said, is great, and Jace, as always, never lets go of my hand. I find myself leaning toward him, inhaling the clean scent of his soap, hanging on to each detail he shares about his childhood. My mind wanders, and I think of my discussion with Georgia, about how much he makes me smile, how happy I am when I’m around him. Then, it hits again, like a tidal wave threatening to pull me under. My belly knots and my throat burns, and I have to escape to the bathroom.
“I’ll be right back.” I feel Jace’s gaze on my back as I rush away, needing to put some distance between him and whatever is happening inside of me. Thank goodness the bathroom is empty. I lock the door immediately and give myself a few minutes to calm down, taking in deep breaths through my lungs and exhaling slowly. Once I feel semi-normal, I open the door, only to come face to face with Jace. “What are you doing here?”
He’s reclining against the wall, expression unreadable. “I want to talk to you.”
“Here? In front of the bathroom?”
A soft chuckle. “God, you make me laugh. Yes, here. It can’t wait.”
Whereas earlier I was leaning in, I now find myself leaning away. “Okay.”
He digs a hand into the pocket of his jeans. “At my place earlier, you asked what was bothering me, and I didn’t know. But I know now.”
“You do.” The look on his face…I didn’t recognize it before, but I do now. My heart thunders and I don’t know what to do with myself, so I alternate between chewing on my lip and fidgeting with my hands.
“Yes, Lily, I do.” He only takes one step, but somehow I’m a cornered animal with nowhere else to go, no escape. “I didn’t want you to leave. It’s a frequent occurrence,” he says with a nervous laugh, and nervous Jace is new. It’s another side to him I find endearing. “Whenever we’re together, I don’t want our time to end, and when we’re not? I’m counting the minutes until I can see you again.
“I’m not very good at this,” he admits. “I’m stumbling in the dark here. A little like that boy at the grocery store, the one who didn’t know what to do or say, but deep down he knew how he felt. I think you’re scared, Lily, and I want you to know that I’m scared, too. But, between the two of us, maybe we can figure out a way to navigate this together.” He moves one step closer, eyes searching mine. “What do you say, Lily? Are you with me?”
How can I say no when he’s putting his heart on the line, when he’s willing to be vulnerable?
The answer is: I can’t.
“I’m with you.” The words are barely a whisper, but it doesn’t make them any less true. Each one is a staccato beat inside my chest, lighting me up like a brilliant display of fireworks.
Jace’s smile…I wish I could bottle it.
“Well, Miss Conrad, it appears we’ve reached an understanding,” he murmurs, lips awfully close to mine. “I’m glad we had this little chat.”
“I am too, actually,” I counter, happiness spreading warmth to my limbs. “Do you think maybe now would be a good time to kiss me, Mr. Harlow?”
He throws my words and a handsome grin back at me. “In front of the bathroom?”
I nod. “Timing is everything, isn’t it?”
Gentle hands reach for my face, holding me as warm breath breezes over my lips. This time, when Jace kisses my waiting mouth, everything quiets. There is no doubt, no worry, no fear, because he washes it all away, leaving me with a certainty I haven’t felt in a very long time. And something else too.
Hope.
“Rowan loved the Marvel movie yesterday.” Georgia feeds her sugar addiction, adding three packets to her coffee in the employee lounge. “I think he especially liked the large b
ucket of popcorn.”
My mouth tugs up. “And those Skittles weren’t so bad either, were they?”
“Not bad at all.” She looks over at me as she pours cream into her mug. “I’m surprised you noticed, though. You were so busy drooling over Chris Hemsworth.”
My already enormous smile takes on new life. “I make no excuses for my obsession.”
“Me either,” she says with a lopsided grin. “Which is precisely why I got the jumbo bag.”
“I don’t get how your teeth are so perfect with all the candy you eat.”
“It’s hereditary. I get it from my mother.” She pins me with a glare. “Why the hell are you so happy? It’s certainly not because of my Colgate-perfect teeth.” Then a pause. “Riiiight. You’re still on cloud nine, I forgot.”
“I am feeling rather floaty,” I say, grabbing my cappuccino and doing a light skip over to the table.
Georgia follows me and we both sit. “Now that you’ve got your head and your heart in sync, all is right with the world. It’s disgusting, actually.”
A laugh bursts out of me. “It feels dreadful.”
“I’m happy for you, sweetie,” she says, the deep sincerity in her tone making emotion ball in my throat. She hands me a tissue from her purse. “You’re starting to act like me after I watch Casablanca.”
“Yes, I know.” I dab the Kleenex against my eye. “I’ve watched it with you at least twenty times.”
Georgia winks. “At least, and you’re such a good sport.” She stirs her coffee before setting the spoon on a napkin. “By the way, on an unrelated note, I did not like Chaz. He’s kind of a jerk.”
“You told me that yesterday, and I actually disagree with you there. I think—”
“But…” she interrupts, a flash of mischief in her eyes.
“Uh-oh. How did I know there was a but?”
Dark pink lips curl, and I’m afraid to hear what she’s about to say next. “But I’d have sex with him. He’s seriously hot.”
I put as much malice behind my glare as possible. “Don’t. You. Dare.”
“Why not?” she asks, as if the reason isn’t abundantly clear.
“See this face”—I point a finger toward my cheek—“and hear me when I say this: because he’s Jace’s brother, that’s why.”
“That’s a terrible reason,” she grumbles, sipping from the Skittles mug I bought for her.
I bring my own cup to my lips. “You know sex is your shield, right?”
“I don’t have a shield.”
My eyes roll skyward. “Whatever you say.”
“I say I love this mug.” She lifts it in the air. “Who bought this for me, anyway?”
“I know what you’re doing.”
She shrugs, clinking the ceramic against mine. “Cheers.” Then she exhales a heavy sigh. “In fifteen minutes, I have meetings for the remainder of the day. Shoot me now.”
“Lily.” Alec’s firm voice barges into our conversation. “My office.”
“Good luck,” she whispers. “He’s especially salty today. I think he needs to get laid.”
I pick up my mug and walk it to the sink. “Please tell me you’re not volunteering.”
She flinches. “I wouldn’t come within ten feet of that thing, or him.”
“Good. I’ll catch up with you later.” I toss her a grin as I exit the lounge. “If I make it out alive.”
I take the elevator up one floor, swinging by my desk before heading into Alec’s office. His back is to me as he stares at the expansive view of the city, and it takes more than a minute for him to acknowledge my presence. I’m already sitting, fingers poised above my laptop when he finally does. Without a word, he strides to the door and closes it. Then he returns, leaning against the edge of his desk directly in front of me, arms crossed and expression severe.
“You won’t be needing your laptop, Lily.”
“Oh, okay.” I close my computer and try to send my sunshiny vibes his way. Of course, it doesn’t work. Maybe Georgia was right.
“Something very disturbing has come to my attention, and it needs to be addressed,” he says, and the way he’s staring at me suddenly makes my skin crawl.
I sit farther back in the chair, watching the muscle in his jaw twitch. “Whatever it is, we’ll handle it.”
“Of that I have no doubt,” he replies with the certainty of a man who always gets what he wants.
“What’s this about?” I ask, anxious to move this along. Alec doesn’t act like this with me. He’s always pleasant and treats me with the utmost respect, but then again, I wouldn’t stand for anything less.
He white-knuckles his desk with both hands. “I understand you’re dating Jace Harlow.”
My back stiffens. “I’m sorry?”
His voice is sharp. “You heard me.”
“Yes, I did,” I respond in an equally firm tone, setting a boundary while still being respectful. “However, I’m not sure that’s any of your business.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Lily. You signed a confidentiality agreement when you started here, and Jace Harlow and I are business rivals. For all I know, you could be revealing proprietary information.”
“What? That’s ridiculous. I’m doing no such thing, and furthermore,” I add, gaining steam, “whatever I do on my off hours is not your concern.”
His gaze darkens. “I disagree. I see it as a conflict of interest,” he says, nostrils flaring. “So, I’m going to make this real simple for you. It appears you have a choice to make, and just to be clear, if you don’t make the right one, I’m going to have to let you go.”
My mouth falls open, yet somehow I’m able to speak. “You can’t do that.”
“Actually, Lily…” He edges forward, and I’m nauseated by his proximity. “This is my company that I built from the ground up, and I can do whatever the hell I want.”
And I won’t go down without a fight.
“I’ll go to HR,” I warn him. “This is not a business-related matter. There’ll be legal ramifications.”
“Believe me, my decision will override HR, and I’m sure the board would agree with me.” He walks around to his chair and sits. “You need to make a decision, Lily,” he informs me, words clipped. “You have until Friday.” He directs his eyes to the paperwork on his desk. “You can go now,” he says, dismissing me without another glance as if I haven’t busted my ass in this job for over a year.
I rise from the chair with unsteady limbs, keeping my head high and my dignity intact. Then I search for the door as if it’s a life raft. One step from my salvation, Alec’s voice stops me, but I refuse to turn around.
“Ninety-six hours, Lily. I’ll expect your answer then.”
My life has been reduced to a ticking clock.
Jace’s warnings about Alec fire off in my head. My back, neck, and every other muscle in my body are shaking with fury. Alec may be a hardnose, but I actually enjoy my job and love working at this company. Plus, I’m only two years away from having enough money for my own gallery, two years away from the dream I’ve had since I was a little girl.
Saturday was the best night of my life, but today?
The sky is falling.
“What an asshole,” I mutter to myself, slamming the door shut behind me and dropping my purse before hurling my keys onto the table. They land on the floor, but I couldn’t care less. I’m too hell-bent on stomping straight through the living room and into the kitchen, opening the cabinet that houses the Cocoa Puffs. I don’t bother to find a bowl, digging my hands in and eating them right out of the box. I’m certain this situation calls for it.
To think Alec actually believes I’m some sort of spy. Lily Conrad, spy extraordinaire—it’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. It’s more than ridiculous. It’s preposterous. I couldn’t spy my way out of a paper bag. Besides, the last thing on my mind when I’m with Jace is Alec.
“Grrrrr.”
I shovel more Cocoa Puffs in until my stomach hurts
then march to the living room, kick my heels off, and throw myself onto the couch. My texts to Georgia went unanswered, so I assume she’s still tied up in meetings. I’ll just lie here until she comes to rescue me.
When a knock sounds not more than fifteen minutes later, I scramble off the couch and trip all over myself trying to get to the door—only it’s not Georgia. It’s Jace.
My emotions must be displayed on my face because the first thing he says is, “I thought you’d be happier to see me.”
That prompts my first smile in hours. “Of course I’m happy to see you. Come in.”
The second he’s inside, he secures me in his arms and presses a soft kiss to my lips. “I’m on my way to a dinner meeting so I only have thirty minutes, but I didn’t see you yesterday, and I didn’t speak to you all day today.” His eyes shine bright. “I missed you.”
Be still my heart.
“I missed you, too.”
He pulls back to inspect my face. “You okay? You look tired.”
“Yeah, I’m okay. I am tired, though.” I rest my head against his chest, closing my eyes and breathing him in, wanting to forget all about this crap day and unwilling to share the details of it. It’s not because I’m trying to be dishonest but because Jace will want to step in and fix it for me, and I can’t let him do that. I’m probably being stupid. He’s a smart man and I’m sure he would have sound advice, but something tells me I need to take care of this on my own.
“Busy day, huh?” he asks, and I lift my head.
“So busy.”
He kisses my forehead and a sigh spills out. “You need to relax and get to sleep early.” His eyes drop to my mouth. “You smell like something sugary.”
If only my smile could wipe away this day. “Cocoa Puffs.”
He grins. “Checked those off your list, did you?”
“Yup.”
His gaze moves beyond my shoulder. “What’s that?”
“What’s what?” I ask, looking behind me.
“That brown package against the wall—it has my name on it.”
Nerves tumble in my belly. “Oh, that…”