by Jane Porter
Nick rolled his eyes. “Now it’s siblings, too? Last I heard, the wish list stopped with being a flower girl and having a new mommy come live with us.”
“I thought Miss Tess was gonna help you find someone to be my mommy,” Bailey piped up. “But I still think it should be her! She said you were tractor...um, tractive?”
“Attractive,” Nick said. Definitely time to change the subject. “So what did you do this evening, kiddo?”
She beamed. “Grandad and I saw a poisonous snake out by the pond and Uncle Wyatt said maybe next time he helps babysit, he’ll teach me to shoot a rifle.”
“Like hel—” At the piercing look from his mother, Nick quickly amended his word choice. “Heck. You’re not old enough for that.”
Venomous snakes and guns? Bailey definitely needed more feminine influence in her life. It was becoming easier and easier to adjust to the idea of someday remarrying. Perhaps because he’d met someone he could see himself falling in love with.
* * *
“THIS IS AWFUL.” TESS LAY sprawled across the sofa in the main room of the B and B, an arm thrown over her eyes. Although there were two couples checked in to the establishment, they were currently on a trail ride with Sam. Tess and Lorelei had the place to themselves, leaving Tess free to vent about her wanton behavior the previous night. “Can you believe I made out with him?”
“I’m not seeing the problem.” Lorelei sat in a nearby chair, feet tucked beneath her while Oberon the cat stalked in circles around her, still deciding whether he would deign to let her cuddle him. “You kissed the hot cowboy. Yippee, I say. Did I mention you’re entitled to a ‘plus one’ at the wedding?”
Tess glared from beneath her arm. “Many times.” She sat suddenly, swinging her legs to the floor. “You’re forgetting his long-running interest in Farrah Landon.”
“Yet he wasn’t kissing her.”
“Well, no. She wasn’t the one convenient. She wasn’t the one standing in front of him, undressing him with her eyes. If she had been...” Would he have kissed Farrah with the same passion he’d shown Tess? Would he have bothered to stop if it had been Farrah in his arms, or would the two of them have made love through the night—the way Tess had dreamed of once she’d finally fallen into a fitful sleep?
Tess sighed. “I think I’ll take you up on that offer of coffee if it still stands.”
When she’d first arrived at the B and B, Lorelei had volunteered to get her a beverage and a breakfast pastry; Tess had felt too miserable to enjoy either. Instead, she’d flung herself onto the couch and into her recriminations. But given her lack of rest, if she didn’t get some caffeine in her system soon, she could become a hazard to herself and others.
The two women went to the kitchen, Oberon following them in case there were treats to be had.
Lorelei poured two steaming mugs. “Okay, Nick liked Farrah at some point. They were never a couple, though. He is allowed to change his mind and develop feelings for someone else.” She leaned across the counter and lightly bopped Tess on the head. “This means you.”
“Over her already? He seems...steadier than that. He’s not his brother, chasing after a different woman every week. He can commit. Nick’s the only one among them who’s been married.” And speaking of his marriage... The confession he’d made about his feelings for Marla plagued her.
“I know he wouldn’t appreciate my talking about him,” Tess began, dumping sugar in her coffee. “But you’re one of my best friends and if I can’t discuss—”
“My lips are sealed. Tell me anything you want, and it’ll go no further,” Lorelei promised.
“You mean like when you told Heather I was trying to fix him up with Farrah?”
Lorelei winced. “Okay, that was unfortunate. But I really thought she knew. From here on out, no more mistakes like that.”
“He confided to me that one of the reasons he proposed to his ex was because he was so comfortable with her.”
“Makes sense. You certainly wouldn’t want to marry someone who makes you uncomfortable on a daily basis.”
“Yeah, but... When Sam walks into a room, there’s that zing between the two of you. Your first thought is not that he’s as comfortable as a broken-in pair of sneakers. To some degree, Nick found her safe and convenient. What if he’s ducking his feelings for Farrah because they aren’t so safe?” Taking the easy way out, as it were.
“And what about you?” Lorelei reproached softly. “Did you come here hoping I’d talk you out of a discomfiting emotional risk? No one gets it more than me, how unpleasant it can be to make yourself vulnerable. But trust me, the rewards of loving and letting yourself be loved back...” She trailed off, fiddling with her engagement ring. Her expression as she contemplated life with Sam was more eloquent than any words she could have used.
Tess stared through the kitchen window at the picturesque flower garden, not wanting to face her slim, accomplished, genius-with-numbers friend as she made this admission. “You know what an understudy is, right? The alternate who learns all the steps for those times the show must go on but the real star isn’t able to take the stage? I’ve felt like that so many times, Lor. The perennial bridesmaid, the younger sister who never fully earned her parents’ respect, the dancer who was good enough for corps but never solos. I’m waiting for my chance to shine, to star in my own life. I’ve never let my pride make decisions for me, but I can’t budge on this one principle. I can’t be anyone’s backup plan.”
Tess wasn’t a kid anymore, content to go to prom with her crush because his first choice couldn’t make it. She’d rather never see Nick again than see more of him because he found her easier to talk to and less intimidating than the woman he really wanted.
Chapter Nine
Standing behind the microphone at the front of the school cafeteria, the PTA president clasped her hands in front of her ample boson. “Why, Mr. Calhoun! Thank you for your willingness to help. I thought it would take more wheedling on my part to talk someone into chairing the committee.”
Committee? What? He looked around the room at some of the other parents’ expressions. Amusement and pity were the chief responses; one single mother whose twins had once celebrated their birthday at the Galloping C mimed a phone with her fingers. Call me.
Okay, so, going forward, he now knew to be very careful about standing up at PTA meetings. But the reason he’d bolted to his feet was because he’d spotted Heather Winchester in the hallway, speaking with the music teacher. He knew Heather had helped with costuming the children for the performance that would start once the PTA meeting ended.
He wanted to speak with Heather because she was close friends with Tess Fitzpatrick—the same Tess Fitzpatrick who seemed to be avoiding him. When she’d ushered him out of her house Saturday night, she’d told him to call her later. Ha! It was now Tuesday, and she’d yet to return any of his three messages.
Trying to cause as little disturbance as possible, he sidled to the edge of the cafeteria, then quickly exited the room.
“Mrs. Winchester?” He strode toward Heather.
Her friendly smile didn’t mask the confusion in her gaze; they’d never spoken before and she was clearly surprised at being sought out. “What can I do for you?”
“Nick Calhoun.” He shook her hand. “Our daughters are in the same dance class.”
She nodded slowly. “Yes.”
Now what? He’d been full of conviction when he’d hurried from his
seat, but it wasn’t as if he could demand to know why her friend had stopped speaking to him. He could understand that maybe he’d made a mistake in kissing Tess, but she wasn’t a shrinking violet. He would have assumed she’d simply tell a guy he screwed up and move on from there. He was the one uncomfortable having conversations, not her.
Stalling as he tried to decide on a strategy, he said, “I understand your daughter Josie is one of the best in the class. Will she be doing a solo at next week’s performance?”
At the mention of her daughter, Heather immediately softened, her quizzical expression replaced with maternal pride. “Yes, she is. She’s so excited about it. She loves dance class.”
“My girl’s the same way. And no wonder—they have a great teacher, don’t you think? I wanted to ask you about Tess. She specifically asked me to call her over the weekend, but she hasn’t answered her phone. Have you seen her or talked to her? I’m starting to get a little worried.”
Heather bit her lip, apparently unwilling to divulge whether she’d spoken to Tess. Was she afraid he’d press to know what her friend might have confided? “I’m sure she’s fine. Probably spending extra time in the studio to get ready for the party next week.”
“Probably. But would you do me a favor?” He flashed her the most charming smile he could muster. “If you see her, remind her to call me? Or, I guess I could just stop by the studio to check on her...” He trailed off, pleased with his stroke of ingenuity.
Judging by the way Heather’s eyes had widened, she would no doubt pass along his words. He suspected he would hear from Tess very soon.
* * *
“I THOUGHT THIS GUY HAD difficulty talking to women?” Heather said disbelievingly.
“What guy?” Lean, rugged Zane Winchester strolled into his kitchen, his cowboy hat in hand. His voice was a playful mock growl as he put his arm around his wife’s waist. “Should I be jealous?” After he’d kissed her cheek, he turned to smile at Tess, who was rinsing lettuce at the sink. “Hey, Tess, staying for dinner?”
Heather nodded. “I insisted.”
Truthfully, Tess was grateful not to be at home. As long as she was busy, she had a legitimate excuse for not calling Nick yet. She did plan to call him, truly—she just hadn’t figured out what to say. Also, she rationalized that by not being available, she was taking away his crutch. Maybe he’d work up the gumption to call Farrah instead.
“Well, we’re glad to have you.” Zane snagged a piece of the cucumber his wife had just sliced for the salad. “I know the girls will be thrilled. Josie worships you and ever since you helped Eden with her hair and makeup for the homecoming dance, she definitely thinks you’re cooler than me.”
Heather laughed. “She’s sixteen, and you’re her dad. She thinks pretty much the entire world is cooler than you.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Watch it. You’re still under suspicion because you haven’t told me who this mysterious ‘guy’ is and I know all the places you’re most ticklish.” He glanced around as if suddenly realizing how quiet the house was. “Where are the girls?”
“Josie spent the afternoon at the Hollingers’ playing with their daughter. Eden just walked over to bring her home for supper. Go wash up. We’ll be ready to eat in about fifteen minutes.”
Zane grinned. “Is ‘go wash up’ code for ‘get the heck out of the kitchen so Tess and I can talk privately’?”
“You Rangers don’t miss a clue, do you? Now, shoo.”
“I’m going, I’m going.”
Not for the first time, Tess thought how perfect the Winchesters were together. The fact that they’d overcome secrets and difficult odds to find happiness was uplifting. I will find the right man for me. Eventually. And when she did, he wouldn’t be smitten with someone else.
Heather swept all the chopped vegetables from the cutting board into the salad bowl. “I thought he’d never leave! We’ve only got a few minutes before the girls get back, so we have to talk fast. Josie’s got radar ears, so it’s impossible to have a private conversation with her in the house, and if Eden catches on that we’re talking about a boy, she’ll want in on the conversation, too.”
Tess thought of the intense way Nick had kissed her Saturday. “I don’t think ‘boy’ applies.” He was all man. She picked up the conversation from where Zane had interrupted. “So explain to me what happened at this PTA meeting?”
“He cornered me in the hall to ask about you. He was charming and determined, not a shy bone in his body.” Heather gave her a teasing smile. “I think you cured him. But I don’t understand why you haven’t called him. What gives, Fitzpatrick? When I was fighting my feelings for Zane early on, you were constantly nagging me to go ring his doorbell and make a move, lay it all on the line.”
“This is different.”
Heather put her hands on her hips, her expression the same one she used whenever Josie sneaked cookies she wasn’t supposed to have or petted a strange dog without first asking an adult’s permission. “How?”
“Because...it’s my heart on the line,” Tess said weakly. Oh, hell. She sounded pitiful even to herself. “I’ll call him. Tonight after dinner, I promise. Unless I’m here late. That would be rude. He works such long hours at the ranch, and I wouldn’t want to wake Bai—”
“You’ll be leaving early.”
“And to think I believed you were a friend,” Tess groused, crossing the kitchen to pull salad dressing out of the refrigerator.
Heather laughed. “As someone I know frequently says, people often need a nudge in the right direction. Consider yourself officially nudged.”
“Got any pointers on what to say to him?”
“Just be honest. If I’ve learned anything over the last year, it’s the importance of telling the truth, no matter how bad it is.” Her tone turned sympathetic. “And, unless I’m way off base, I’d say you’ve got it pretty bad.”
Tess sighed. “I even like it when he calls me Contessa.”
“But you hate your full name!”
“Not the way Nick says it.” She didn’t hate anything about Nick—except how insecure he suddenly made her feel.
From the moment she’d kissed him, she hadn’t been behaving like herself. It was time to talk, to tell him he’d officially graduated Romance 101 and send him on his way. Then she’d be free to start getting over him.
* * *
WHEN NICK SAW TESS’S NUMBER on his cell phone, he wanted to pump his fist in victory. “It was the threat of my tracking you down in person, wasn’t it?” he gloated.
“Polite people say ‘hello,’” she retorted, sounding miffed. “I might even accept ‘hey’ or, under limited circumstances, ‘whazzzzup?’”
He reached for the remote and muted his television. Tess got his full attention. “You’ve been avoiding me.”
“Very true.” Instead of denying it, she simply owned it. That was his Tess.
“Why?” Hadn’t she missed him at all? He’d been going nuts thinking about her.
“I needed to think—”
“Because I kissed you? Should I apologize for that?”
Her breath hitched, a soft, vulnerable sound. “I needed to think about Operation Cupid.”
“That’s over.” He hadn’t thought about Farrah in days. He could not care less who she went with to the town’s Valentine dance.
“I agree. I think you’re ready—you don’t need me anymore.”
“I do! Not for asking out Farrah—I don’t ev
en want to do that. But because...” Damn it. Now was not the time to get tongue-tied!
“You should ask her to coffee, at the very least, to prove to yourself that you can. Spend a few hours with her, see if there are sparks. You owe it to yourself to find out.” The false cheer in her voice faded as she added softly, “No woman wants to be second choice.”
His free hand tightened into a fist. What could he say? Words bounced around his skull, useless in their disjointed state. In a warped way, she was right. It had taken him longer to notice her, to know her. But now that he had... What would soothe her without sounding like manipulative flattery? What would convince her of his feelings without scaring her off? He still didn’t know if she felt the same way.
“Goodbye, Nick.”
Apparently not.
* * *
AT THE END OF FRIDAY’S dance class, Tess’s gaze caught on her own reflection in the mirror that ran the length of the studio wall. Jeez. I look like hell. No doubt caused by her lack of sleep lately. On the upside, she was also experiencing a marked lack of appetite, so maybe she really would lose five pounds before Lorelei’s wedding. There you go, a silver lining.
She forced a smile for the girls. “That’s it for today. I’ll see you all next week for our special Valentine’s Day performance!” She doled out hugs, squeezing Bailey with extra affection.
“When are you coming over for ninja tea party?” the little girl asked.
“Um...” When I start dating some hunky fireman who heals my heart and makes it possible for me to be in the same room with your daddy without aching. “Not sure.”
If the universe was kind, Nick wouldn’t be the one to pick up Bailey after class. Some evenings, it was Erin who came to get her granddaughter. Tess was glad when Mrs. Showalter asked for a registration form for the special dance camp Tess would be holding during spring break. It gave Tess a reason to go into the little storage room where the file cabinet sat. Whoever was picking up Bailey could come and go without Tess even noticing at all.