by Force, Marie
“Oh.”
“Did you mean it?”
“Sort of.”
He wanted to ask her what that meant, but he waited, hoping she’d say more.
“After everything happened with Carl, I said I’d never get married again, and I meant it. I never wanted to be in such a vulnerable position again. Extricating my life from his was ugly and messy and costly. But that was then.”
“And now?” Paul held his breath in anticipation of her reply.
“I don’t know, Paul. I just don’t know. I wish I could tell you I’ve totally changed my mind, but I can’t say that for sure.”
“What happens if this thing between us gets serious and feelings are involved on both sides? What then?”
“I can’t speak for you, but I already have feelings for you. I want to see where they lead.”
He brought her hand to his lips. “I have feelings, too. But I’m not looking to get hurt any more than you are. Would you be willing to keep an open mind to all the many possibilities?”
“I suppose I could do that.”
“I don’t mean to put a ridiculous amount of pressure on you, but I just want to know going in that a future together isn’t outside the realm of possibility.”
“That’s fair enough.”
Paul dropped her hand and put his arm around her, bringing her in closer to him. “I’m really looking forward to the next few days.”
“So am I, but I feel guilty, too.”
“How come?”
“I’ve never spent a night away from Ethan, and I feel guilty for looking forward to it as much as I am.”
Her confession made him laugh. “He’ll be totally fine with Jenny and Alex.”
“I know, but still… What kind of mother looks forward to time away from her baby?”
“The best kind of mom. No need to feel guilty for taking a little time for yourself when you do so much for others.”
“If you say so.”
“I say so.” He kissed the top of her head and dropped his arm from around her shoulders. “I’m going to let you get to bed, and I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Sleep well.”
“I doubt I’ll sleep at all.”
“Why not?”
“I’ll be too busy thinking about two days alone with you.”
She surprised him for the second time that day when she turned toward him and kissed him.
Paul cupped her face and lost himself to the sweetness of her lips and the innocent seduction of her tongue. She had no idea what she did to him when she kissed him so tenderly. He wanted to devour her and had to remind himself that tonight was not the time for that.
Though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he backed off the kiss in slow increments. He leaned his forehead against hers while continuing to stroke her cheek with his thumb. “Is it tomorrow yet?”
She laughed softly. “I wish.”
“I’m going to get up and go inside before I give in to the urge to walk you home and tuck you in.”
“Would that be so bad?”
Paul groaned. “I’m trying to do the right thing here.”
Her fingers slid down his arm to grasp his hand. “I really want you to tuck me in.”
Paul looked at her for a long moment, giving her time to change her mind. “Let me make sure Alex will be here with Mom.”
Chapter 14
Paul got up and went inside to see what Alex was doing, though part of him didn’t want to know. He encountered his brother in the hallway, wearing only a towel, which was a huge improvement over the night before.
“Hey, bro, what’s up?” Alex said.
“That’s what I was going to ask you.”
“Nothing much. Jenny is over at Erin’s, checking on her after she sprained her ankle. I was going to watch the Sox. You wanna join me?”
“Maybe later. I was going to go to Hope’s for a little while if you’re going to be here with Mom.”
“I’m here and not going anywhere.”
“All right, then. If I don’t see you tonight, I’ll see you in the morning before we leave.”
“Sounds good. You’re practicing safe sex, right?”
“Oh my God. Fuck off, will you?”
Alex bent in half laughing at his own joke.
“You’re such an asshole.”
“Paul Michael Martinez,” Marion yelled from her bedroom. “Watch your language.”
That set Alex off all over again.
This time Paul laughed, too. How could he not laugh at the incredible irony of how his mother’s dementia disappeared whenever one of them swore? “I’m outta here.”
“Mind your manners, Paul Michael.”
Paul flipped his brother the bird on the way to the back door, where Hope waited for him. “Let’s go,” he said.
She got up and went with him across the yard to her cabin. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Alex was busting my balls.”
“Are you mad?”
“Nah, it was funny. And then Mom yelled at me for swearing at him. I got the full Paul Michael Martinez.”
“Paul Michael, huh?”
“Yep, and that’s when I know I’m really in trouble. I have to say I love that the dementia goes away at the strangest of times, and then she becomes Mom again.”
“And then Mom disappears into the dementia, and your heart breaks.”
“Yeah.”
She closed the door behind them and turned to him, sliding her hands from his chest up to encircle his neck. “I’m sorry you have to go through that so many times each day.”
“I’m sorry she does. She’s sixty-two years old and could live like this for decades. It’s so unfair.”
“It really is.”
He put his arms around her. “But you didn’t lure me over here to talk about sad and depressing things, did you?”
“I didn’t lure you over here, and we can talk about whatever you want to talk about.”
“You did so lure me with promises that involved beds and hopefully lingerie.”
“I don’t recall mentioning lingerie.”
He kissed her neck, dragging his tongue over her soft skin. “Does that mean you sleep naked?”
“No! I have a child.”
Paul laughed at her outrage. “Go do what you do before bed. Call me when you’re ready for tuck-in.” He kissed her. “Don’t make me wait too long.”
She walked away from him, tossing a look over her shoulder. “I’ll be quick.”
While he waited, Paul sat on the sofa and took advantage of the opportunity to take a closer look at what she’d done to make the cabin a cozy home for her and Ethan. He leaned in to inspect the photos of Ethan on a side table and his framed artwork on the wall. In the corner were buckets of Legos in every shape and color. Paul appreciated that her home was reflective of the most important person in her life.
“Paul,” she called. “Come on in.”
He got up and followed the sound of her voice to her room.
Propped up on one elbow, her hair falling over her shoulder, she dazzled him with how beautiful she looked in the glow of the candle she’d lit on the bedside table.
“Are you coming in, or are you just going to stand there and stare at me?”
“I might stare for another minute or two. I don’t ever want to forget the way you look right now.”
“How do I look?”
“Stunning. Sexy. Gorgeous.”
She held out her hand to him.
He went into the room and took her hand, letting her draw him down onto the bed with her. “Ethan…”
“Has been asleep for an hour, and he rarely wakes up during the night.” She brushed the hair back from his forehead. “You know what the best part of the tuck-in is?”
“What’s that?”
“The good-night kiss.”
“That’s my favorite part, too.”
She fell back against a pile of pillows, bringing him with her.
&n
bsp; Paul wrapped his arms around her, discovering she wore formfitting silk to bed, or at least tonight she did. Her leg slid between his, and her arm encircled his waist.
“You give good tuck-in.”
“This is only my introductory package,” he said. “Tomorrow, I’ll show you my deluxe offerings.”
“I can’t wait to see what comes with the deluxe package.”
He was smiling when he brought his lips down on hers.
“Best tuck-in ever,” she whispered against his lips.
Their bodies moved together as if they’d been lovers for years, and Paul couldn’t wait to have two days completely alone with her.
Erin was settled on the sofa, her injured ankle propped on a pillow, when she heard a rapping on the door downstairs. She groaned at the thought of having to answer the door.
“Don’t get up,” a voice from downstairs called. “It’s me, Slim. Is it okay if I come up?”
“Sure,” Erin said, giddy that he’d come back.
His footsteps pounded up the metal stairs, echoing through the lighthouse. He burst into her living room, grinning from ear to ear, looking ridiculously handsome, carrying something behind his back and a bike tire hooked over his shoulder. “What’d the doctor say?”
“I saw Victoria, the nurse practitioner, because David was at the funeral. They did an X-ray and determined nothing is broken, thankfully. Just a bad sprain.”
“Glad nothing is broken, but sprains can hurt worse than breaks sometimes.” From behind his back, he produced a bouquet of flowers. “Oh damn, I forgot to get a vase. You don’t have an extra one lying around, do you?”
“Under the sink. And thank you. The flowers are gorgeous. Sunflowers are my favorite.”
“You’re welcome.” He found the vase, filled it with water and stashed the flowers, still bound, in the water in typical guy fashion.
She’d tend to them herself in the morning. “What’s up with the tire?”
“I grabbed it for you on the mainland today so we can fix your bike.”
“That’s really nice of you.”
He brought the flowers to her coffee table and plopped down in the chair across from her, resting his long legs on the table. His dark hair was tousled from the wind or his fingers, and his brown eyes took a measuring look at her that made her skin tingle with awareness. “How long are you going to be laid up?”
“I have to take it easy for a week and wear this glamorous brace, but at least I should be off those evil things in time for the wedding.” She gestured to the crutches on the floor beside the sofa.
“Ahh, a week on crutches. That sucks. Have you ever needed them before?”
“Nope.”
“You’ll hate them after two days.”
“I already hate them. They hurt my hands and my armpits.”
“Poor baby.”
“I know I’m pathetic, so don’t pile on.”
“I’ll try not to,” he said with a grin.
“What’re you doing here anyway?”
“You’re here.”
“I’m not quite sure how to take that.”
“I guess I could be more clear. You’re here. You’re lovely. I want to get to know you better, and you never said whether you’ll go out with me.”
Erin swallowed hard at the “you’re lovely” comment. “No, I didn’t, did I?”
Slim stuck out his lip and shook his head. “I had to fly all day not knowing whether I was going to see you again after we spent the whole night together.”
“Don’t say that like it was something it wasn’t.”
“You can’t blame a guy for trying, can you?”
“I can blame a guy for trying too hard.”
“Touché. I meant what I said about wanting to get to know you. Tell me who you are, Erin.”
“I’m a lighthouse keeper at the moment.”
“What were you before that?”
“Let’s see. I’ve been a hotel concierge, a waitress in five-star restaurants, a nanny, an office manager and, for a very brief time, a student at a hairdressing academy. That was an unfortunate segue, especially for the people I practiced on.”
“You’ve had a very eclectic life.”
“That wasn’t always my plan.”
“What was your plan?”
“Law school.”
“What happened?”
Erin hesitated, but only for a moment. This was her story, and she’d learned to own it. “9/11 happened at the start of my third year of law school. My twin brother, Toby, who was Jenny’s fiancé, was killed in the World Trade Center. I left school, and I never went back.”
“God, Erin, I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you. Over the years, I’ve learned to say that as if it happened to someone else. Toby. His name was Toby. He was my twin, my closest friend. After he died, I couldn’t seem to figure out what I was supposed to do without him. I’ve spent a lot of years spinning my wheels, trying to find the answer to that question.”
“And have you?”
“Not yet, but I’m still looking, so I suppose that’s something, right?”
“That’s more than something. That’s everything.”
It was the absolute perfect thing for him to say.
“I’ll have dinner with you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
His smile lit up his face.
“Don’t go getting cocky just because I said yes.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he said, but his cocky grin told the true story. “When am I allowed to take you out for this dinner?”
“As soon as I’m off the crutches.”
“That’s a whole week from now!”
She shrugged, enjoying the game more than she had in longer than she could remember. “Cocky and impatient. Not very attractive qualities.”
“I’m also persistent. If you’re going to make me wait until the crutches are gone, I guess I’ll have to come by to visit every day and make a pest of myself so you don’t forget about me.”
“You’re going to drive me crazy, aren’t you?”
“Baby, that’s the very least of what I want to do with you.”
Erin had absolutely nothing at all to say to that.
Paul’s alarm went off at seven, dragging him out of a deep sleep. He’d gotten four hours of sleep after sneaking back into the house at three. His lips were sore from kissing Hope until they were both crazy from the need for more. Later, he told himself. They’d have the time and the privacy to take the next step.
The thought of that next step had him hard and needy in a matter of seconds. “Christ,” he muttered as he ran his hands through his hair and then got up to face the first half of the day, which promised to be challenging. His mother hated leaving the house, let alone the island, and he expected her to be contentious when she realized what was happening.
He took a cold shower that woke him up and cooled what was left of his ardor. There’d be time for that later. But first they faced the monumental task of getting his mother to the hospital on the mainland.
Paul dressed in shorts and a polo shirt and then packed a bag for two nights away. From his bedside table, he withdrew the box of condoms he’d bought earlier in the week and tossed them into his duffle bag. Just in case. Ha, he thought. Who am I kidding?
After that make-out session last night, there was no just in case about it. He wanted her. She wanted him. They were going to be alone in a hotel room for at least one night and maybe two. He planned to make the most of the time they had alone together. He zipped the bag closed and brought it with him to the kitchen, where Hope was once again overseeing breakfast for Ethan and Marion.
If she ever got tired of the endless sameness of each day, she never let on, and she never showed a moment of frustration with either of her charges. She was all about patience and serenity, which was just another thing to admire about her.
Ethan was cranky this morning, fussing at Hope about the crust on his t
oast, the fact that she was leaving and why he couldn’t come.
Paul glanced at her, offered a smile and tipped his head toward Ethan, asking her permission to intervene.
She nodded tentatively, as if she wasn’t sure she should let him help her out. He wanted her to be able to count on him, even when it came to Ethan.
“Hey, pal,” Paul said, “Alex told me they’re going to start harvesting some of the pumpkins while we’re gone. I thought you might be able to help out after school if you’re up for that.”
Ethan’s big eyes got even bigger. “Really? Like I could actually get the pumpkins out of the pumpkin patch?”
“Yep, but only if you want to.”
“I want to! Can I, Mom?”
“Sure, as long as you do exactly what Mr. Alex tells you to do and don’t get in the way.”
“He won’t be in the way,” Alex said as he came into the kitchen, dressed for work. “Will you, Ethan?”
“No way. I’ll be such a big help.”
“I have no doubt,” Alex said, smiling.
“Run over and brush your teeth and grab your backpack,” Paul said. “I’ll walk you up to the bus if it’s okay with your mom.”
“It’s fine with her,” Ethan said as he tore out the door at top speed.
“Wow, nice save,” Hope said with a warm smile for Paul. “He was winding up to a full-blown meltdown over me leaving.”
“Pumpkins to the rescue,” Paul said. To Alex, he added, “And thanks for letting him help. He’s been watching them for weeks now.”
“Happy to have him,” Alex said as he downed his first cup of coffee standing up, like he did every day. “Don’t worry about a thing while you’re gone. Jenny and I will take good care of him.”
“Yes, we will,” Jenny said when she joined them, her hair wet from the shower. “We’re looking forward to it.”
“You guys are so nice to do this when you have so much else going on,” Hope said.
“You do us a huge favor every day just by showing up,” Alex said.
“Well, you do pay me to show up,” Hope said, making them all laugh.