by Susan Stoker
It didn’t take her long to find what she was looking for.
The same asshole who’d fought her for Hannah had put up a post saying he was looking for a pit bull for his daughter. He identified himself as Victor, and went on to say that it didn’t matter if the dog was old or a puppy, he was desperate to get his sweet little girl whatever her heart desired.
It was all bullshit. Sidney was sure of it. She doubted he even had a daughter. It was more likely he wanted an older dog to serve as bait, and the younger ones he could train to be brutal fighters.
Her teeth clenched and her heart rate accelerated. There were a few comments on the guy’s post, and she wondered if he’d already gotten more dogs for his nefarious activities.
There was only one way to find out.
She knew where he lived, of course; she’d stalked his house when he’d had Hannah. The thought that Victor might be treating another poor dog like he did Hannah made her physically sick.
She closed her laptop and headed for the door.
As she climbed into her car and drove out of the trailer park, she was surprised to realize that she didn’t feel the rush or anticipation she usually did when she was on the trail of an abused dog. Yeah, she wanted to save another animal, but what happened last time was fresh on her mind. Decker wouldn’t show up out of the clear blue to help her twice.
She tried to push down her misgivings. She could do this. Had done this at least a hundred times before. She couldn’t let this guy torture an innocent animal.
She’d seen enough of that to last her a lifetime.
The area she was headed to wasn’t the best part of town, but it wasn’t the worst either. She had no idea why Victor’s neighbors hadn’t turned him in before now. Surely they’d seen Hannah in his backyard like she had. Did they just not want to get involved? Maybe afraid of Victor? Or were they truly all heartless?
She pulled over a couple houses down from Victor’s place and sat there for a long moment. She was pissed at herself for even needing those few extra minutes. Two weeks ago, she wouldn’t have hesitated.
But for some reason, everything was different now. She wasn’t sure if it was her conversation with Faith or because she had more to lose. Things with Decker were going amazingly well. She really liked him, and honestly believed that he had true feelings for her too. She’d never been in such an intense relationship before…and they hadn’t even done more than make out on his couch.
Sidney had a feeling that after they made love, that would be it. She was already half in love with Decker, and being intimate with him would push her over the edge.
She knew it. She also knew how he felt about her putting herself in danger. He hated it. Loathed it. He hadn’t gone so far as to forbid her from doing exactly what she was doing right now, but she had a feeling if he knew where she was and what she was planning, he’d be furious.
That should’ve pissed her off. No one told her what she could and couldn’t do. But instead, it made her feel cared for. Her parents had surely never given a rat’s ass what she did. And after she’d testified for the prosecution in her brother’s trial, they’d literally turned their backs on her. But she’d been alone even before that…for as long as she could remember.
Decker always insisted she text him when she got home. When he talked to her on the phone, he was genuinely interested in what she’d done since the last time he’d seen or talked to her. He was always keeping others from bumping into her when they went out, tried to take the outside seat when they ate in restaurants. He wasn’t chauvinistic, but now that she was thinking about it, he did whatever he could to keep himself between her and whatever or whoever might cause her harm.
Deliberately pulling Hannah to the forefront of her mind, Sidney did her best to concentrate on why she was there. The animals. Victor wouldn’t hesitate to kick, drag, and hurt another dog like he had Hannah. She figured he thought he was toughening them up for the ring or some such bullshit.
The dogs didn’t ask to be abused. They didn’t ask to be thrown into a pit with other dogs who’d been so brainwashed and battered that they fought whatever was put in there with them.
Her mind back to where it needed to be, on the dogs, Sidney climbed out of her car, pocketed her keys, and made her way toward Victor’s house. She’d just do some recon. See if he had any other dogs in his backyard. She’d get the information she needed and pass it along to Faith, so she could get her network of cops and animal control officers to step in. She wouldn’t get involved physically.
Happy with her plan, and thinking that maybe, just maybe, she was taking a small step toward getting over the guilt she’d held on to for so long, Sidney made her way stealthily toward the back of Victor’s house and peeked through a small hole in the fence.
Gumby was tired. His nights with Sidney and the long days of reviewing the details of their next mission were catching up with him. Wanting to be with this woman had actually become more important than making sure his body was in peak condition. He knew it was dangerous, but he couldn’t get enough of Sidney. The way she smelled, her laughter, her teasing…how she felt under his hands and lips when they made out.
He wanted to be inside her more than he wanted to breathe, but he was enjoying the push and pull of their relationship too much to rush things.
She was it for him. He knew that already, without a doubt. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. So he had to take things slow. Make sure she knew he wasn’t with her simply for a roll in the hay. No. If he had his way, she’d eventually be Sidney Kincade. He’d need to get a bigger house to fit any children they might have, and the menagerie of animals he had no doubt they’d want. She had way too big a heart to be able to resist adopting animals. He could keep the beach house as a getaway and have a bigger house built in a subdivision with other families—
“What do you think, Gumby?” their commander asked.
Blinking, he focused on Storm North…and realized he’d completely missed what had just been discussed. “I’m sorry, Sir,” he said a little sheepishly. “I missed that.”
Their commander sighed, but he patiently repeated what he wanted Gumby’s opinion on.
An hour later, Gumby headed out of the conference room with the rest of his team. He knew he had to apologize to the guys. He waited until they were all in the stairwell, then said, “Wait up a sec, guys.”
Everyone stopped and waited for him to say what he needed to say.
“I want to apologize for not being completely present lately. It’s inexcusable, and it won’t happen again.”
Rocco clapped a hand on his shoulder. “I get it.”
Gumby knew out of all the guys, Rocco would. He had Caite now.
Phantom scowled. “This is what I was worried about with Rocco. Women always seem to fuck things up.”
“We’ve had this conversation already,” Rocco warned, turning to their teammate with his hands on his hips. “Just because I have a woman I love, doesn’t mean I can’t do my job too.”
“Gumby only heard half of what we talked about in there,” Phantom protested. “How the hell is he going to be able to do his job on this upcoming mission if he doesn’t know half the shit we discussed?” He gestured back toward the conference room.
“I said I’m sorry,” Gumby told Phantom and the rest of the team. “I know I fucked up, and I need to pull my head out of my ass.”
“I hope the pussy’s worth it,” Phantom grumbled.
“Shut the fuck up,” Gumby said, pissed now. He could admit that he’d screwed up, but he’d be damned if he sat around and let Phantom disparage Sidney.
“Not cool,” Ace added.
“That was out of line,” Bubba told Phantom.
His anger cooled a little at the support of his teammates. Gumby took a big breath and looked Phantom in the eye. “I know that you’ve been treated like shit by the women in your life—and I’m sorry for that. But Sidney is not them. Neither is Caite. I’m trying to do the
right thing and apologize for not being one hundred percent dialed in. But I won’t stand here and let you badmouth my woman. The last thing I want is for her to feel uncomfortable around any of you guys, but if you keep this up, I’ll do whatever I can to keep her away from you. And that will hurt the dynamic of this team, which would suck.
“She’s it for me, Phantom. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. But I also want her to look at all of you guys as her brothers. I want you to love her like a sister-in-law.”
The others murmured their agreement, but Gumby only had eyes for Phantom. The man looked both pissed off and apologetic.
“In all the years we’ve known you, we haven’t pressed for more details about your childhood. All we know is that it sucked and the women in your life made it that way. But you can’t go on like this, man. Your bitterness is eating you up inside. Sidney’s done nothing but be nice to you. You seemed to like her when you all showed up at my house to meet her. What’s different now?”
The other man hesitated. Then said quietly, “I just don’t want to see any of you get manipulated and treated like shit. The way my mother treated men.”
Rex opened his mouth to reply, but Gumby held up a hand to stop him. “I love you, man. I know as guys, we aren’t supposed to say that sort of shit, but fuck that. I love all of you. We’ve been through the worst kind of hell together. I’ve saved your lives and you’ve saved mine. And I’d expect you to speak up if some bitch is doing that shit to me. But Sidney isn’t like that. I know it down to my bones. And…me loving Sidney isn’t going to make me love you guys any less.” He put his hand on Phantom’s shoulder. “Give her a chance. It would kill me if you couldn’t get along with her. I’m begging you, Phantom. Please.”
He nodded once.
Relieved, Gumby dropped his hand. “And I’m going to do better at being present. I know I’ve been slacking, and it won’t happen again.”
“It’s hard to figure out the balance between giving your woman what she needs and being able to give the SEALs one hundred percent too,” Rocco said.
Gumby appreciated his insight. “I’m figuring that out.”
“From what I observed, Sidney isn’t the kind of woman who needs you by her side twenty-four seven. Just like Caite. She has a job, a life, outside of you.”
“I know,” Gumby said.
“And she kicks ass at This is War,” Bubba threw in.
Everyone chuckled.
“True,” Gumby said. “Anyway, I appreciate you cutting me some slack, but I’m good now. I get it, and you don’t have to worry about me pulling my weight on this upcoming mission.”
Everyone nodded and clapped him on the back as they headed down the stairs.
Gumby caught Phantom’s arm. “Are we good?”
“We’re good.”
“I meant what I said,” Gumby told him. “If you need an ear…I’m here.”
Phantom nodded, but Gumby had a feeling his friend wouldn’t be coming over to have a heart-to-heart anytime soon. He’d just have to deal with his demons in his own way and own time.
Gumby was headed to his car when his phone rang. Seeing it was Sidney, a smile formed on his face.
“Hey.”
“I’m okay.”
Gumby’s heart rate immediately increased, and he stopped in his tracks. Right in the middle of the parking lot. “What?”
“I’m okay. I wanted to say that right off so you don’t freak.”
Too late for that. “What happened?”
“I kinda got into another…scrape…with that asshole dog guy.”
“What?” Gumby couldn’t get his mind to work.
“But I’m fine! I told you. I only have a few bruises and scrapes. But I managed to get another dog away from him.”
Gumby felt sick. The black eye she’d gotten from that asshole the last time had finally healed, and now she’d gotten into another fight with him? “Where are you?” he bit out.
Sidney hesitated, and he knew he’d been too harsh, but he couldn’t help it.
“I’m at Faith’s.”
“What’s the address?”
“Decker, I’m fine,” she said softly.
“What. Is. The. Address?” he asked again, enunciating each word clearly.
She gave it to him, then said, “I’m really okay, Decker.”
“Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“I thought you had that meeting today?”
“I did. It’s done. I was on my way home anyway.”
“Oh.” She paused. “Don’t you want to know about the dog?” she asked.
Gumby started walking toward his truck, much more quickly now. “Honestly? No. I’m more concerned that my girlfriend put herself in danger again. That she’s got bruises and scrapes from fighting with a fucking asshole who has no problem throwing acid on a defenseless animal.” He took a deep breath, trying to get control over his emotions. Then he asked, “Did Faith put you up to this?”
She hesitated, and he knew what her answer was going to be before she said a word.
“No. I was sitting at home and realized I hadn’t checked on the websites I usually look at in a while. Saw that Victor had posted, saying he was looking for more dogs. I wasn’t going to do anything, I swear…but when I saw that poor puppy chained up in his backyard, crying, I couldn’t just leave him there.”
“You could’ve called the cops. Or Faith. Or me,” Gumby told her.
When she didn’t respond, he sighed. Feeling more and more tired, the two and three hours of sleep he was getting each night were finally catching up with him. He loved Sidney because of her compassion, even though right now, he hated it. “Okay. Stay put. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“You’re mad,” she said.
“Not mad,” he countered. “Worried. Scared. And a little frustrated.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’ll see you soon.”
“Okay. Drive safe.”
“I will. Bye.”
“Bye.”
Taking a deep breath before he started his truck, trying to get his emotions under control, Gumby closed his eyes. Intellectually, he knew he couldn’t be by Sidney’s side every minute of the day, but he hated that she’d put herself in a position where she could’ve been seriously hurt. He had no doubt this Victor guy wouldn’t have any problem taking out his frustrations on Sidney. He’d gotten his hands on her twice, and Gumby didn’t want there to be a third.
But if Sidney didn’t see how much danger she was putting herself in by going out and tracking down dog abusers by herself, he wasn’t sure what he could do to keep her safe.
Shaking his head, Gumby pulled out of the parking lot and headed toward the address Sidney had given him.
Sidney bit her lip—and immediately regretted it. She’d forgotten that Victor had managed to get in a solid punch and split it. Her shoulder hurt from where he’d grabbed her arm and wrenched it upward in an attempt to get her to let go of the puppy, and her face hurt from where she’d scraped it on the fence while she was scrambling back over it, but she’d gotten the puppy away from him.
She’d felt on top of the world for being able to rescue the puppy, filled with adrenaline…until she’d gotten to Faith’s house.
The older woman had taken one look at her and pressed her lips together as if she was disappointed.
It had hurt.
But after giving the puppy a much-needed bath and some food, and holding him as he slept in her arms, Sidney felt much better.
“He has a right to be pissed,” Faith told her from the chair across from the sofa, where Sidney was currently sitting, holding the puppy.
“He’s not the boss of me,” Sidney said, and immediately felt like a surly teenager.
Faith just shook her head. “I’m pissed at you,” she told Sidney. “I told you not to take such risks again.”
“But…” Sidney gestured to the puppy in her lap. “I got him out.”
&nbs
p; “And if you’d called me, told me what was up, I could’ve contacted my sources and they would’ve been able to get him out legally.”
“You know as well as I do that it wouldn’t’ve been that simple. Animal control would’ve seen the dog house and bowl of water and would’ve had no reason to take him away. Victor does just enough to keep the law off him. He would’ve killed this puppy or raised him to be a fighter, and you know it.”
“Be that as it may, you can’t go around stealing people’s animals, Sidney,” Faith reprimanded. “This rescue group isn’t a vigilante operation. Word gets around that we’re obtaining our animals illegally, we’ll be shut down faster than you can say ‘lawsuit.’ I know you need to help dogs, Sid, I do, but you can’t continue this way.”
Sidney hated being scolded. Especially by a woman she looked up to and admired.
“I’m worried about you, Sidney. I’ve been in the rescue business a long time. I’ve seen a lot of shit. Met a lot of people who were passionate about what we do. But I think you know as well as I do that you’re taking too many dangerous risks. You’ve got to back off.”
“I…I know what I’m doing isn’t healthy,” Sidney admitted softly, burying her head into the clean fur of the puppy in her arms. “But I can’t make myself stop.”
“Then maybe you need to get some help with that,” Faith said matter-of-factly.
“I’m afraid it’s too late. I should’ve gotten it a long time ago, for lots of reasons.”
“It’s never too late,” Faith told her gently. “Talking with someone, understanding why you feel the compulsion that you do to help the dogs, can go a long way toward making it easier to stop taking so many risks.”
Sidney wasn’t sure of that, but the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to try. She didn’t want to jeopardize things with Decker. And she was tired of the guilt. Tired of feeling as if the safety of every abused animal was on her shoulders alone.
But the second the idea of getting help went through her mind, the very same guilt she was trying desperately to ignore came back full force.
Faith just didn’t understand. But knowing she wouldn’t be able to convince her right now, she simply nodded.