by Vera Quinn
“Do you think it will stop her? I mean why would she even bother? She’s never had anything to do with Shelby. She came to see her occasionally but no bonding experiences. I was just scared, and Sunday morning I was freaked out, and I panicked. The only way I got away from Kendall was to run, and it’s the first thing I thought to do. Mr. Lemons already said he found nothing filed and that if I wasn’t around, they couldn’t do anything because Kendall signed his rights away. I just thought leaving was the best thing to do.” She won’t look at me. She doesn’t want to tell me about Rebel. “Can I give Shelby a bath? It's close to her bedtime, and I’m hoping since the fever is gone maybe she can sleep?”
“Sure thing. I’ll clean up in here and the kitchen. It’s right up the hall across from the room I put our stuff in.” I get up and start to clean up.
“I’m not worth your time Brody and I’ve really messed up.” I look at Gracie, and she looks so sad.
“Gracie, everyone screws up. It’s what we do to make it right that matters. We’ll talk after you get Shelby down. There’s a king size bed in that room, and I am sleeping in there with the two of you. I’ll be sleeping in sweats, and it’s so you feel safe, and you’ll be able to sleep. That’s it.” Gracie has a sad smile on her face.
“I’ve heard a similar story to that before, but I trust you, Brody. You’re a good man, and I will feel better with you there. You always make me feel safe.” Gracie takes Shelby down the hall. I start cleaning up our little mess. Gracie didn’t eat much so I put the rest of the soup and sandwich in the microwave in case she wants it later. I clean up everything in the kitchen. Then I go out and bring some wood in and put it by the fireplace in case we need it later.
I look inside the fireplace, and it is clean and ready to go. I go outside and look around, and I see nothing. I go back in and make sure everything is locked up tight. I send off a text to dad and Kaden letting them know Gracie is with me and safe. I look up and see Gracie is standing there watching me. She has on a big t-shirt and sweats. It makes me think of Jilly back when we were younger.
“Shelby asleep?” I ask her.
“Yeah she is.” She walks over and sits on the sofa and looks at the floor. “Brody, something happened between Rebel and me. I can’t lie to you about it. You’re too good to Shelby and me. I don’t deserve your help. You had told me before you left you wanted something with me, but I went ahead and slept with Rebel. You warned me about his club life, and I ignored it. I can’t take it back, and I’m sorry if it hurt you. So if you don’t want to be around me then I understand.” Gracie is breaking my heart here. I know I should walk away but that is what I always do and I can’t this time.
“Gracie, I already knew that when I came after you. I can’t say that I like the idea but whether our relationship goes any further or not has nothing to do with my coming and taking you back home. It also has nothing to do with me being your friend. You were just honest with me, and that is a good basis for friendship. As long as we are honest with each other, we’ll have a good friendship at least.” I give her a minute to take that in. “I still want you, but I’m no idiot. We need to talk about what happened with you and Rebel and why you ran.” Gracie goes red in the face, and I know she is embarrassed but for us to move past this she has to talk.
“Do we have to? I’d rather just forget it.” Now I really want to know, but it is her choice.
“I’m not here to judge. I promise you’re not going to shock me.” I’m hoping that will put her at ease. She nods her head, yes, but when she starts speaking, I can barely hear her so I go and sit beside her and hold one of her shaking hands. They are as cold as ice.
“Everything that day was fun. I haven’t had a lot of fun in the last couple of years, so I was enjoying it. The fair was great, and I met Sylvie, and she is so sweet. Her three daughters helped with Shelby, and it was just a great day. I didn’t want it to end. When Audie got ready to go, she said she would keep Shelby overnight so I could stay longer with Rebel and I agreed. Rebel was a perfect gentleman, and we both slept in his bed. We went to sleep, but I guess I had a bad dream because I was worried about Shelby being away from me all night. She’s never stayed away from me for a night, and I had a nightmare. Rebel woke me from it, and I came on to him.” Gracie looks at me for understanding.
“It was my own fault Brody not the other way around, and I’m ashamed to say that. I needed Rebel.” Hearing her say this is like turning a knife in my heart. “I thought we were making love. Sometime in the night Rebel got called away on some business but when I woke up that Jade woman was in bed with me and she said it’s what Rebel wanted and expected. She was doing things to me while I was asleep.” Gracie looked at me, and her whole face was bright red.
I know Gracie is innocent when it comes to sex. She had to be humiliated. I know Rebel did not send Jade into that room. He wouldn’t. Not if he thought Gracie was his. Any other woman, probably, but he would have been right there with them. So what do I tell her? “I can’t be that kind of woman Brody. I don’t want to be that kind of woman. I wouldn’t do it if I only had myself to think about but I have Shelby to think about, too.
“So when I got back to Audie’s and read the letter Lorraine had left, the only thing I could think of is if she found out about the things that go on around Rebel then she would have grounds to take Shelby. Being the chicken I am, I just ran. It was easier than facing everything, and I don’t have the kind of money the Giles have, and I didn’t see a way of fighting it. I know I didn’t think it through, and there is no way Lorraine could know about what happened but running seemed the best solution. I soon found out exactly how hard it is to be on the run with a toddler who is used to playing all day. Then her teeth started bothering her, and it was a mess. I had it easy when Jilly helped me. This is hard.” I see it has all taken a toll on Gracie. I try to absorb everything Gracie has said.
“So when you say Jade was doing things to you what do you mean exactly?” I have a good idea, but I need to be sure.
“Do I have to say it?” I look at her, and I know I am right, but I am not going to make her say it.
“Was she giving oral sex or something else?” Gracie nods her head. “Rebel would not have sent Jade into that room alone to you. She was trying to manipulate you, and she did a pretty good job. She sent you running. I warned you about those damn club girls.” I know I shouldn’t say I told you so but I did.
“What do you mean Rebel wouldn’t send her in there alone? Why would he send her at all?” Gracie was hurt by Rebel like every other woman who has ever cared about him.
“If Rebel had wanted Jade in there it would be so he could have both of you at the same time.” Gracie is shocked.
“What do you mean the same time? As in have sex at the same time with both of us? Why? I knew it! Kendall was right; I’m not enough. I’ll never be enough to keep a man.” Gracie is crying softly to herself, but it is tearing me apart.
“Gracie, they do that at the clubhouse. Sometimes it’s two men and one woman. Some men like that kind of thing. I’m not going to lie, I have tried it, but it’s what a man does when he’s just fucking someone. Not when he has the one he can’t even imagine sharing. Everyone finds that one sooner or later. I think Rebel and his club brothers just haven’t found that yet or maybe some have. I don’t know; I can’t answer for them.” I don’t know what to say to make it better for her.
“I let him have me unprotected. I didn’t even think about a condom. How dumb can I be? What if they never use condoms?” Rebel fucked her without protection.
“Are you on birth control?” I have fisted my hands at my sides. I am filled with rage stirring inside me.
“Every birth control I have ever tried made me sick. I tried an IUD once and it gave me an infection. I haven’t tried anything since then.” I need to go for a walk. I have to let this anger out.
“I’ll be back in a little while. I need some air.” I get up, and I am out the door before Gracie can say an
ything. I do remember to lock the door, though. I look around outside, and I see a pile of wood someone was working on in the side yard. The ax is in the stump they were using for splitting.
I pick up the first piece of wood, and I don’t stop until I am through with the whole pile. I finally put the ax back where I got it, and I just think, staring at the stump. This is just like Jilly. Gracie could be pregnant. I can’t see Gracie in Rebel’s life. He would try to do the right thing, but his damn club always comes first, and it would take him away from Gracie and Shelby and then the baby. That life would slowly kill Gracie. Hell, one night sent her running.
I can’t see Gracie trying to struggle with two children by herself. She would try her hardest, but that is a lot for one person. I care about Gracie. I more than care for Gracie and my mind is made up. I will not let Gracie be the next Jilly.
My body has a good burn going on. I make my way back up to the house and dig the keys out of my pocket. I go in trying to be quiet. I go straight to the refrigerator and get a bottle of water and finish it off. I go into the living room, and Gracie is still sitting in the same spot I left her, and I see she has been crying ever since I left her.
“I’m going to grab a shower and I’ll be right back out. I’ll be quiet, so I don’t wake Shelby.” I leave Gracie there to get my things from the room Shelby is sleeping in. She looks like an angel sleeping soundly in the middle of the bed. I grab my bag and hit the shower. I let the hot water soothe my aching shoulders. I dry off and find my sweats to sleep in.
I know I am going to have a hard time convincing Gracie of the crazy idea I have in my head, but I think she will listen to reason and then we can go home. I make my way back in the living room, and Gracie is still sitting there looking like she has lost her last friend. I sit beside her and pull her into my arms. She comes easily and hugs me. I rub her back, and then I relax into the back of the sofa, never letting go of her.
“What you told me was hard for me to hear but you did nothing wrong. I have feelings for you Gracie, but I can’t make you care for me.” I turn her sideways and make her look at me. “I think we can have a good thing, but you have to want it, too. Will you give us a chance, Gracie? We have to trust each other.” She looks at me closely.
“Are you saying you still want me?” She sounds surprised.
“Yes, Gracie. I want you and I want you to trust me. I have an idea to fix all this. It’s a little bit crazy, but I know it can work. Will you trust me?” We look into each other’s eyes. “Can you trust me with everything? If you do, we will start home tomorrow. We will take our time and make a couple of stops and figure it all out together. We just have to trust each other and be totally honest. Can you guarantee me that you can do that?” Gracie looks like she is thinking about and considering everything. I am glad because she has to.
“If we were to do this, would you ever want another woman with us? I can’t afford any more mistakes. Could I be enough for you if we took this further?” Gracie sounds hopeful.
“I swear I will never be anything but totally honest with you. If we moved further into this, you would be more than enough for me.” I guarantee her.
“Then I will trust you, but I need sleep before making any big decisions.” She does look dead on her feet.
“I’m going to sleep with the two of you. I’ll get extra blankets out of the other room, and I’ll sleep on top of your blankets and under the others. That way I am there, but we’ll still be separate. Is that okay with you?” I wait for her answer.
“That will be alright.” We both stand up. I reach in my pocket and take my phone out.
“I am going to text Dad and Kaden that we are going to be home in a few days.” We make it in the hall, and I send the message. I go one way in the hall to get the extra blankets and Gracie goes into the room with Shelby. I grab a blanket and join them, and I see Gracie has moved Shelby over by the wall, and she climbs on the bed, and I lay down beside her. She is close but not really. I can deal with that. I wait until I know Gracie is asleep and I completely relax and drift off into thought. Tomorrow our lives will change. I only hope it is for the better. I look at Gracie and then at Shelby, and I know I have to make their lives safe. That’s my last thought of the night.
Chapter Fourteen
Rebel
The only thoughts in my mind for the last eight days have been of Gracie. Where she might be and how she and Shelby have been. I have turned over every rock and talked to everyone. Tip finally found a lead on her in Colorado. That’s where she sold her car. It’s been three days and nothing.
Today I am dealing with Jade and then I am meeting with Kendall and Donald Giles. I received a text this morning from Ma that Brody has Gracie and Shelby with him and they are on their way home. I still have a few days to take care of everything here so when Brody finally gets here with my girls, all I have to do is convince Gracie I had nothing to do with what Jade did. I don’t know exactly what happened but today I will find out. I’ve had Jade contained in a storage building with just food and water. I wanted her to worry. I want her to think about everything I could do to her so when I ask my questions she’ll be too scared to lie. I must know what I am facing. Then I’ll get rid of Gracie’s worries about that Giles woman.
I walk out of my office and to the bar. I motion for the prospect to get me a beer. Spinner and Sin walk up to me and I know it is time to get this shit done. Sin usually dishes out our punishments being our SAA. He’s almost six and a half feet tall and close to three hundred pounds of pure muscle. I’ve yet to meet a son of a bitch bad enough to knock him down. Today I will do my own dirty work. I down the beer handed to me and turn to go outside to the storage building. Spinner and Sin are right behind me. I push the door to the shed open. I go straight in and let Jade out of the ropes holding her. “Tell me what you did and what you said to Gracie. You get one chance Jade. Don’t fuck it up!” I am trying to contain my anger but I am having a problem with that.
“I need to go to the bathroom.” She looks at me. Looking for compassion. I have none. Gracie would be here now if it weren't for her. She sees I am not swallowing the whining. “I’ve been good to you, baby. We can be good together. Just give me a chance. Gracie isn’t woman enough for you if she runs off so easily.”
“Jade your bucket is in the corner over there. Pop a squat and piss.” She looks at me and goes and does just that. She takes care of her business quickly, and she is back to whining.
“I need a shower, baby.” She tries to run her hand up my arm, but I shake her off and push her away.
“I told you before, and I hate repeating myself, Jade. Gracie is my ol’ lady, and I have no use for you anymore.” She rolls her eyes. I almost snap, but I know what Jade needs to hear straight from me. The truth just like I have always given her.
“Jade look at me. Look into my eyes.” She turns and looks at me knowing I am serious. “I am in love with Gracie. I made her my ol’ lady, and I am going to make her my wife. If she doesn’t already have my kid inside her, she will soon enough. Do you get what I am saying? I will never fuck another woman.” I see in her eyes exactly when it registers in her little brain that I am not shitting her. “What the fuck did you say to her and do? This is your last chance. I have already banned both Sugar and Whinny. So what do you think I am going to do to you if you don’t tell me the truth?” I see her considering it.
“I just told her that you sent me into your room with her. I told her we shared in the club and that’s what she was going to have to do to keep you. It was expected of her.” Jade is leaving something out, and I know what it is.
“Tell me what you did to my woman.” I wait.
“I was going down on her. I thought she would like it. Her body was responding to me, but she freaked the hell out when she woke up. I thought I could get her used to being with me and we could share you.” Jade is dumb enough to think I would actually want that. Sin grunts behind me.
“So you touched my woman?” I wait
for her answer. She doesn’t answer. “Without her or my permission?” Jade knows she is done.
“Yes, but I thought it’s what you would eventually want, and I was trying to help,” Jade says quietly.
“Oh shit.” Spinner lets slip. I think about it, and I know this is not something Gracie is going to forgive easily. I can only hope she loves me too.
“Sin take Jade home and let her pack one bag. Put her on a bus out of Texas.” Sin steps up to Jade. “Jade, if I ever see you again I will put you to ground. I am reaching out to every one of our clubhouses and letting them know I will take it as a personal offense to me if you are allowed in any of the clubhouses. Jade, I will not forget this so do not ever let me see you again. Sin, you see her after she gets on that bus put her to ground. Spread the word.” Sin grabs Jade by the arm and leaves with her. Spinner steps up beside me.
“Are you sure Gracie is worth all this? She isn’t going to forgive this easily.” I look at Spinner, and if I didn’t know my brother is only concerned about me I would hit him, but I know he is just worried.
“In case you missed this part, I love her. So yes, she is worth everything. The club is the only thing I put above her and Shelby, and that is just the way it is. Now let’s go talk to the two assholes who are going to help me get my woman back. If I can get this off Gracie’s back, it may help ease my way back into her life. She’s with Brody right now, and I know he’s doing everything he can to talk her into giving up on me. I won’t let her.” The sooner this is done, the better.
Chapter Fifteen
Gracie
I have been dreading arriving back home all day. I know when we get there I am going to have to answer questions. I feel awful about the way I left, but I thought it was the best thing at the time. I talked to Jilly a little on the phone last night, and she made me feel better about the decisions I have made, but I am still apprehensive about facing Lorraine and Rebel.