The next day Julia texted me and asked me to meet her for coffee at Starbucks. When I showed up, she was glowing.
“Hey, Liz. Thanks so much for meeting me.”
“Sure, Julia. How you been? You look fantastic.” And she really did. She was extra cute in a low-cut black top, a white mini skirt, and wedges. She looked like she was lit from the inside.
“I’m great!” she gushed.
“Okay, spill it,” I demanded.
“I think I’m in love.” She batted her lashes and was smiling ear to ear.
“Wow, really?”
“Yes, really. Tyrone is absolutely amazing.”
“Are you sure that’s not just the orgasms talking?”
Julia giggled. “Well, his skills in the sack don’t hurt, believe me. But it’s so much more than that. He is thoughtful and sweet and generous and funny.”
I nodded in agreement. Tyrone really was all she mentioned and more. I could not attest to his sexual prowess, but I had no doubts. And the way Julia was bouncing in her chair, I had a hunch she would be getting some lovin’ very soon. “Do you think he feels the same way?”
With no hesitation Julia nodded. “Yes, I do. We haven’t said it yet, but I don’t even need to hear those words. The way he makes me feel is better than any kind of love that I’ve ever known.”
“Wow.” That was all I could say for the moment. Those were pretty powerful words coming from my spoiled friend. “I’m happy for you, Julia. I really am. I hope things all work out.”
“Thanks, Liz. I think they will.”
That night I was working in my home office trying to meet a deadline.
“Mommy, Mommy, look at me!” Isabella was standing at the door of my home office.
“One second,” I barked. I was in the middle of typing up a presentation, and I didn’t want to look.
“Mommy! Mommy, look!” Now she was shouting.
“What?” I snapped and looked up.
Isabella was rolling her eyes in back of her head and sticking her tongue out at the same time. She looked like some kind of possessed alien.
I shook my head from side to side. “Isabella! That is what was so important?”
Her crazy face got sad. “I didn’t say it was that important. I just wanted you to see me.”
“Well, I’m working, darling.”
“Fine!” My temperamental child yelled as she stomped off.
I slouched in my chair and thought to myself, Jesus Christ. I’m not doing anything right. I’m a horrible mother, I’m behind at work, and God only knows what kind of wife I’ve been lately. And what is Isabella’s deal? I see her. What the hell is she even talking about?
Then I got that sick feeling in my stomach like I was on my way to a client meeting and forgot to bring something really important.
“See me, see me?” Was it those words that were speaking so loudly to me?
Just then I heard a text come through on my phone. Annoyed, I picked it up; it was from Braden.
Hey, babe. I just got invited to go golfing tomorrow with some work buddies. Do we have plans?
Was he for real? I had told him at least five times this week that we were going to my nephew Johnny’s birthday party tomorrow.
Does he not listen to a word I say or see how important it is to me that the kids spend time with their cousins?
That was my aha moment. That’s why Isabella’s words hit me so hard. That was exactly how I felt with Braden. He didn’t see or hear me anymore. I wanted to be seen. That was why when Nick appeared in my life, I was so tempted. He looked at me and really saw me. That’s what I need. Maybe that’s what we all need.
I wanted Braden to look at me and tell me I was beautiful and feel like he meant it. Not a drive-by “you like nice,” but an actual locked-in moment where he was truly seeing me. I wanted him to look at me like he did when we were first going out, like the first time we made love, like he did on our wedding day.
But how could he tell me I was beautiful if he wasn’t even looking at me?
MARIA
The next month dragged on. Time sure did not fly when I was not having fun. I missed Enrique so much it hurt to get up some mornings. I didn’t realize how much of my happiness was tethered to him. During our time together I popped out of bed, excited to get the, “Good morning, beautiful”, text he sent every morning without fail.
I longed to feel his lips on mine, to feel how warm and safe I felt in his arms. I ached to feel our bodies entwined with passion and heat, with fervor and lust. I missed his voice, his ridiculously sexy Spanish accent, and how he was always rolling his R’s, and the way his saying my name felt like a song.
All this longing for Enrique just made my marriage to Zack more intolerable by the day. I was daydreaming at work when my phone rang. I saw Liz’s photo pop up on my cell.
“Hey, MILF,” I teased as I answered my phone.
“Hey, Maria. How are you?”
“Eh, I’ve been better, and you?”
Liz sighed into the phone. “I have something to tell you.”
“Okay…” I sat down afraid of what she was about to tell me.
“Enrique and Claire split up.”
“Oh, no. That’s awful. I feel terrible. I know he really wanted to try and make his marriage work for the kids. What happened?”
“I’m not sure. Will you call him?” Liz asked.
“Hmm, I don’t know. I don’t think so. If he wants to reach me, he knows how. He must not want to be in touch. Maybe what we had wasn’t so special to him after all.” My voice cracked as I swallowed hard to hold back the tears.
“Aw, no, Maria. That’s not true. Enrique loved you. I’m sure he still loves you. He’ll call you. I’m sure of it.”
“Listen, Liz, thanks for letting me know. It’s almost five o’clock, and I just want to go home and get lost in a bottle of wine.”
“Okay, hon. I’ll call you tomorrow. Love you.”
“Love you too.” I hung up my phone.
I sat there for a moment in disbelief. Enrique and Claire had split up, and he hadn’t called to tell me. If Zack and I split up, he would be the first person I would think to tell. Did that mean he didn’t want me after all? Didn’t he still love me?
Fighting back the tears, I started packing up my laptop when Blake popped his head into my office. “Hey, Maria, a group of us are going out for happy hour. Wanna come with?”
Normally, I wouldn’t even consider it, but I wanted to go out that night and drown my sorrows. As luck would have it, the kids were at a sleepover and Zack was away.
We walked a few blocks to a local watering hole. The bar was packed, typical for a Friday night. There were six of us: five young single guys and me. It seemed like getting wasted was the plan for the evening, and who was I to get in the way of that?
We sat at a round high table, and before I could even look at the wine list, a round of lemon drop shots were brought to the table. I was the oldest one in the group and didn’t want to seem like an old fuddy duddy, so when Blake passed me my shot and a lemon, I just smiled and said, “Thank you.” Our waitress returned quickly with another round, and with just two shots, I was feeling pretty relaxed.
The other guys from work started circling the bar like predators seeking their prey. It was fun to watch them: their body language, the way they would smile at a girl they were interested in, waiting to see if she would smile back. I kind of missed that, being young and single.
“What do you want to drink? I know the bartender, and she’ll hook us up with the good stuff.” Blake stood there smiling, waiting for me to respond.
“Oh, okay. How about Grey Goose and Red Bull?” I was in the mood to get drunk fast.
“Yum, sounds good. I’ll get the same. Be back in a few.”
Blake practically skipped up to the bar. His ass was so small and tight in his J. Crew jeans, and I loved his country club style.
As promised, Blake was back quickly. He had two big glasses
with our drinks and two smaller shooters. This was going to be a long night.
“Here, first do the Sex on the Beach shooter, and we can chase it down with our Red Bulls.” Blake seemed so proud of his big idea, I couldn’t possibly turn down his beautiful innocence. He handed me my shooter, we clinked them together, and he said, “Cheers.”
I couldn’t help but smile at him. “Cheers,” I said, and like the sorority chick I once was, I downed the drink and chased it with the vodka.
The alcohol was starting to hit me hard, making me feel happy and mellow, something I hadn’t felt since being with Enrique.
“So Blake, tell me something interesting about yourself,” I said coyly.
Blake paused for a moment to think. “Well, I’m not gay, if that’s what you think. I just love clothes and musicals.” We both laughed.
He leaned in close; he had one arm on the table and his legs on either side of my stool, practically straddling me. He tilted his head down and looked me right in the eye. His face was no more than a foot away from mine.
“In fact,” he said, “I absolutely love women, especially older, married women.” His voice was low and raspy.
I sat stunned for a moment, not sure how to respond to him. I was glad I had not imagined the “I want to fuck you” looks he gave me in the office. “Oh?” I tried to play off his obvious advances.
“And you, Maria, love younger, hot single guys.”
“Do I?” I tried to sound coy.
“Yup, you do. You love how they look at you, undressing you with their eyes. You love the idea of being with a young, strong, hot guy. Someone who would take the time to make you feel good and spend hours just kissing you head to toe. Someone who would have the stamina to keep up with you all night long. Someone also in their sexual prime, someone who could never say no to you, someone to help you fulfill your deepest, darkest desires.”
I crossed my legs on the barstool. Blake’s words were getting me so turned on I could feel my panties getting soaked.
He gently placed his strong hand on my knee. His touch made me jump a little.
He moved in a little closer. I uncrossed my legs, and he ran his hand up the side of my inner thigh very slowly. I didn’t say a word, but my eyes locked with his and told him not to stop.
“You want to know what it would feel like to be taken by a man who has been lusting after you for months, don’t you?”
I nodded ever so slightly.
His hand inched higher and higher up my leg until his fingers were just outside of my silk panties.
“I’ve seen you checking out my package, Maria. You want to know if I’m as hung as you think I am, don’t you?”
I nodded again; I could barely move. His fingers were gently circling on the outside of my wet panties, and I was dying to feel his fingers inside my pussy.
“You’re aching to feel my fingers inside of you, gently moving on the outside until they glide inside and caress your G-Spot.”
With one hand he gently moved my panties to the side while the other hand slowly started caressing my clit. I moved up a little on the stool, and he slipped his finger inside of me. I tried not to make a peep; I didn’t want anyone around to notice us. But it felt so good! I bit my lower lip to keep myself from making any noise.
“Come on, Maria, let’s go.” Blake confidently slid his hand out from my skirt, took my hand, and helped me hop off the stool. He didn’t ask me if I wanted to go to his place; my body told him all he needed to know.
We hopped in a cab, and luckily his apartment was only ten minutes away. In the car, Blake took my face in his hands before he feverishly kissed my lips.
We stumbled into his apartment, and before I got a chance to even look around, Blake threw me against the wall. He placed my hands above my head against the wall and ran his fingers down my arms. He picked up one of my legs and put it around his waist and started massaging one cheek.
“Wow, Maria. Your ass is amazing. I’ve fantasized about doing that for months.”
He kissed me passionately. His tongue wandered in my mouth; he sucked on my tongue and bit my lower lip. Blake was an amazing kisser, making me wetter and wetter by the moment.
He unbuckled his belt, and his pants fell to the ground. He stepped out of them and stood there half naked with his stiff cock waiting for me. He hiked my skirt up and then lifted me in his arms, placing my legs around his waist. He pressed me against the wall and teased my wetness with his throbbing dick.
I wanted him to go inside so badly.
“You want me, don’t you, Maria?”
“Hmm . . . mmm.” I could barely talk.
“Say it, Maria. Say you want my big dick inside your tight pussy.”
My voice was trembling and I could not wait to feel him inside me. “Blake, I want your big cock so badly. I need it. Come on, don’t make me wait anymore,” I pleaded.
“Okay, beautiful. That’s what I like to hear.”
He hoisted me up a little more so I could slide onto his thickness. He brought me down slowly.
“I want you to feel every inch of me, every ridge, as I enter your velvety pussy.”
I nodded, and I did. I felt every detail of his massiveness entering me. My body shook when he was all the way in. I had never felt such a strong man and never felt such a big cock in this position.
“Damn, Blake. You feel amazing.” My insides were already throbbing. I felt like I would explode if I moved at all.
Blake grabbed onto my ass and bobbed me up and down his shaft. His lips were warm on my neck; my head was thrown back, riding him and reveling in the incredible sensations this man was bringing to my body.
“Oh, Maria, you are freaking amazing. Ride me, come on, gorgeous. Feel all of me, feel my balls crushing against your clit.”
He pressed in closer, and that’s all my body could handle before it shuddered in perfect bliss.
“Blake, Blake,” I moaned out.
Blake gently let me go and then placed me on my knees. “Now, you’re going to swallow me.” He didn’t ask; he just told me, and it turned me on.
I opened my mouth so I could engulf his huge cock. Blake’s eyes rolled in the back of his head.
“Yeah, I love that. Roll your tongue around the head. Suck me, Maria.”
I licked and sucked and teased him with my tongue. Then with my right hand, I stroked his cock slowly up and down, and when he said he was close, I gently massaged his balls with my left hand.
“Oh, Jesus!” He threw his head back and yelled, “I’m coming! I’m coming!” I felt his warm liquid spray into my mouth and ooze down the back of my throat. It tasted salty and warm. I loved that I could make him explode like that.
Blake gave me his hand to help me off my knees after he finished. I stood up and kissed him hard on the lips.
“Mmm . . . that was yummy.” I smiled at him.
He kissed me back hard. “Maria, you are so freaking fantastic. I knew you would be. I could see right through your soccer mom image in your cute little Ann Taylor outfits. I’ve been lusting after you since the first time I saw you.”
LIZ
Flashback: Twenty-five years old
For my twenty-fifth birthday, Braden took me on a cruise to Alaska. It was the first cruise I’d been on, and I was blown away by the ship’s amenities and the beauty of the Alaskan terrain, not to mention how many Mai Tais I could drink in one night.
One evening, we decided to explore the casino. I had never played roulette before, and I was captivated watching an elderly gentleman. He smelled like Old Spice cologne and had deep laugh lines around his eyes and smile. He reminded me of my grandpa, my Papa, who’d died when I was ten.
My Papa. I still remember the way he’d look up at me through his thick, black glasses while reading the New York Times and sipping on his piping hot black coffee. It was Thanksgiving, and we were visiting our grandparents in Florida. They were snowbirds and spent half the year in New Jersey and half the year in Boca Raton.
<
br /> Sitting at his glass table in his swanky kitchen of their Boca condo, we were the only two awake. He had just made me his infamous homemade waffles with whipped cream and cherries. They were my papa’s specialty.
He was always sharing stories from his youth and doling out words of wisdom. That morning was no exception.
“Elizabeth, if you want to live a long and happy life, there are three things you need to do. First, wake up early; spend time by yourself before all the hustle and bustle of the day. Exercise, meditate, read the Bible. Do something that will get your day off on a good note. Sometimes life throws us messes, but it’s a lot easier to clean them up if you start your day off right.”
“Two, don’t get caught up in the nonsense of other people’s lives. When you find yourself getting worked up about something, take a moment and think about if it will matter in an hour, a day, or even a week. If the answer is no, then don’t let it get to you. God only gave us twenty-four hours in a day. Use them wisely. Every day, make time for family, work, and play. Family first, family is always first.”
“And three—and this is the most important one, so listen carefully.” I hung on to his every word. “Be happy. Life is short. It may not seem like that now when you have too much homework and your crush, Arthur Tutella, doesn’t love you back. But I promise you, one day you’ll blink and wake up and you’ll be sixty-five years old, your baby will be forty, and you’ll be having breakfast with your wonderful granddaughter.”
I smiled when I finally realized he was talking about me. He pulled me in close, ruffled my bangs like he always did, and kissed me on top of my head.
“Did you hear what I said, Lizzy?”
“Yes, Grandpa. Be happy.”
He took off his glasses and looked at me deeply in the eyes. “I wish someone had told me that when I was a kid. I spent so much time doing what I thought I should have been doing, I missed out a lot on life.”
Sex and the Social Network Page 17