CARA
I’m not angry anymore. I had nothing to be angry about – when it comes to Damian. He tried to protect me, and I can’t hold that against him.
It hurts so much that my own blood wanted me dead. Damian was right when he said that he saw someone who was alone in this world. It’s a scary thought… being alone.
If I need someone in the middle of the night for any reason, there is no one to call.
I don’t have a next of kin to give if someone should ask.
I have no friends.
I have no family.
It hurts so much that I have no one. I’m a ghost.
It’s these thoughts that weigh heavily on me. I carry them for three whole weeks before they break me.
It’s the middle of the night and I can’t sleep. I’ve been feeling crappy the past week. I think it’s just everything that’s happened to me that’s catching up.
I can hear Damian breathing. Damian… why do I keep calling him that? It’s not his name. I can’t call him Sam, and Alex is still new to me.
Sam, the man I’ll never know. The ghost in his past.
Damian, the man who saved me. The predator who kills, who was meant to kill me, but instead kept me.
Alex, the man who’s supposed to be my husband. The handyman who loves fixing things.
Who is the real man that’s lying next to me?
I hear him move, and I whisper, “Why did you really keep me?”
It’s quiet for a while, but I know he’s awake. I can feel his energy.
“I saw someone who was broken, and I wanted to fix you.”
“Because you couldn’t save Leah?”
“Partly, but mainly because your own uncle wanted you dead. My father tried to kill me once – that’s when I left for the army. We had that in common. Our own blood wanted us dead.”
I absorb what he’s telling me and then turn on my back. I stare up at the dark ceiling.
“Why are you staying with me now?” I close my eyes, scared of what his answer might be.
“I’ve never met anyone as strong as you. Normally, people are scared shitless of me, but although you were scared in the beginning, you didn’t back down. You were at your lowest, and you still stood your ground in front of me. I’ve never seen such strength in anyone. It’s a rare beauty. Life just keeps taking blows at you, and you just keep getting up.”
“Life hits like a bitch,” I joke and we both chuckle, knowing it’s not the truth. Life hits hard, so fucking hard, but it helps to joke sometimes.
“I’m not angry,” I whisper. “It just hit me that I’m alone. I have no family. I don’t know who you really are.” I suck in a deep breath and whisper, “I just feel so alone.”
I feel him turn on his side, his eyes on me. “I’m just a man in love with a kick-ass girl.”
I chuckle and turn on my side, too, looking into his eyes for the first time in days. I’m glad it’s dark, so I don’t get the full impact of those grays.
I want to make a joke to break the tension but instead, a sob bubbles over my lips and the words come out thick with tears, “So you won’t leave me?”
He moves closer to me, and then his fingers brush over the curve of my cheek. “Never.”
“Not even when I grow old and fat?”
He laughs and leans in until I can feel the heat of his breath on my lips. “Not even then.” He presses a kiss to my lips and then whispers, “I live you, Cara. I live for you, and I’ll die for you. There’s nothing here for me but you.”
“I live you, Alex,” I whisper, and he pulls back.
“Why Alex all of a sudden?”
“Sam belongs in your past. I’ll never get to know him. I think he died with Leah, and I’ll let her have him to keep her safe wherever she is. Damian is a cleaner who saved my life, but Alex is my husband, and he pieced me back together. Alex is my family.”
He presses a kiss to my lips again and then whispers, “I live you, Nina.”
This time it’s my turn to pull back with a grin pulling at my lips. “Why Nina all of a sudden?”
“Cara is an eighteen-year-old girl who died the day her parents died. I think we should let her rest in peace with them. Karen, she suffered so much heartache. To be honest, no one can possibly survive everything she had to endure. I think it’s best we let her go, but Nina, she’s this kick-ass chick who works down at the hardware store, and I really want to score with her.”
Laughter bursts from my lips and I roll onto his chest. “So you want to get into my pants?”
“Hell, yeah,” he growls, his hands slipping over my hips and gripping my ass tight.
I push off of him and laugh. “Then you better buy me dinner first. I’m not that easy.”
I hear him chuckle as I walk to the kitchen to make myself some tea. The smell of coffee has made my stomach churn the last couple of days.
I’m glad we had this talk. I feel better, as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Sure we have to get to know each other, but that’s what the future is for.
CHAPTER 22
ALEX
It’s been two days since the talk. Things feel better between us, and those deafening silences are gone.
I’m leaning against the truck, waiting for Nina to get off from work. I’m forcing myself to think of her as Nina, because she’s fought so hard for that name. It will also reduce the risk of one of us slipping up.
It’s time to put the past behind us and to focus on a future neither of us thought we’d ever have.
I hear her greeting Joshua, and then she comes walking out of the store. Her eyes find me, and she smiles wide.
I grin back at her and say, “Hey, Nina.” I push away from the truck when she gets to me. “Wanna go for a ride in my truck?” Laughter bubbles over her lips, and I lean in even closer. “We could get ice cream.”
“Oh, we could?” she asks.
I move into her personal space, almost touching her. “Yeah, and I could watch you lick it off your fingers,” I whisper.
“Uh-huh,” she mumbles. I can see the heat flaring in her eyes.
“And then you can suck the ice cream off my fingers.”
She starts to nod. “I like the sound of ice cream.”
I hurry to open the door and bundle her inside. I can hear her laughing as I race around the truck.
We get our ice creams at the diner, and then I drive us to the same spot we parked at before. We get on the back of the truck, and I watch her lick the ice cream. She’s a fucking tease because she’s eating that thing as slow as she can. I’ve finished mine already, and she’s only halfway.
“Fuck this,” I say. I grab the ice cream and throw it to the side. She squeals with laughter, and I grab her hips, pulling her onto my lap.
As I lean in for a kiss, she pushes me back. She darts up and then jumps off the back of the truck. Oh, she wants to play.
I get up and run after her. She runs into the water and screams like a girl. Well, she is one, but still. She turns around to see where I am, and I dive at her. She laughs as we hit the water. I quickly turn us around, so she’s on top.
I stare up at her, and she takes my breath away. Her hair is wet and as my eyes travel lower, I see her hard nipples straining against the wet material.
“I knew you liked getting wet, but I never knew you looked so hot.”
She laughs again. “You remember that?”
“Yeah, you walked right into that one that day.”
“I was so jealous of Jean.”
“Why?” I whisper as the water starts to suck us in deeper.
“Because I already loved you back then,” she admits to me.
“Can I tell you a secret?” I whisper, and she nods quickly. “You’re the only woman I’ll allow on top of me, but we’re going to drown if we don’t get up now.”
“Ass!”
She shoves me under the water and gets up. I watch her as she stalks away from me and then call out to her, “Sexy ass. You
love my ass!”
She flips me off, and then I hear her laugh again. I get up and follow her to the truck. We’re both soaked. We might as well take this party home.
NINA
I don’t even make it to the front door before he peels my shirt off.
If we had neighbors, they’d be getting a full view right now.
My shorts come off in the living room. I lose the bra at the bedroom door, and the panties almost make it to the bed.
I help him out of his wet clothes and turn us around so that his back is to the bed. I shove at him lightly and whisper, “Lie down.”
He shakes his head but he lies down while mumbling, “Also the only woman I’ll take orders from.”
Once he’s fully stretched out in front of me, I drink in the stunning man before me.
“What’s that look for?” he asks.
“Just enjoying the view,” I say, and then I crawl over him. I straddle his hips and then lower myself onto him. Once he’s inside me I still, just taking in the feel of him. It feels like I’m home. Finally.
I’m biting my nails as I leave the hardware store. I’m so nervous. Shit.
I get in the truck and then turn to face Alex. He starts to drive off. Smiling at me, he asks, “Did you have a good day?”
I bite my bottom lip and then just blurt the words out, “I’m pregnant.”
He stops the truck in the middle of the road and just stares at me.
“Did you hear what I said?” I ask nervously, and I go back to biting my thumbnail.
Slowly, he nods, and then a smile spreads across his face. “We’re pregnant?” he asks, and I watch as emotion floods his face.
Someone hoots behind us, and he quickly starts the truck again. We drive in silence for a while, and my nerves start to get the better of me again.
Then he just pulls over. He grabs me to his chest and kisses me hard. “We’re pregnant?” he asks again.
“Well, I don’t know about the ‘we’ part. I’m the one doing all the work.”
“My sperm had to swim its ass off for that egg, give it some credit,” he says all serious, but I see the smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“Your sperm didn’t take my egg on a date. Your sperm is so in the dog box.”
A huge grin spreads over his face, and then he turns the truck around and drives back into town.
“Where are we going?” I ask, giddy with happiness that he’s handling the news so well.
“The sperm is taking the egg to dinner.”
I burst out laughing as he stops in front of the diner. He runs around the front and opens the door for me. He helps me out, letting me slide down the front of his body, and then his eyes start to shimmer with tears, and it instantly makes me want to cry.
“I’m taking my beautiful pregnant wife to dinner,” he whispers, and a tear slips down his cheek.
All choked up, I whisper, “Why are you crying?”
“Because I’m so fucking happy. I’m so happy that you chose to stay with me. I’m so happy that you live me. I’m so happy that you’re going to have my child.”
“I’m happy, too,” I whisper, and then I stand on my toes so I can reach his lips. “Thank you for making every one of my dreams come true.”
“I did?” he asks, holding back on the kiss.
“Yeah.” I inch a little closer to his mouth. “I just wanted a husband who loves me, and a house full of kids. That’s all I ever wanted.”
He presses a soft kiss to my lips, and I smile against his mouth. “We’ll have to get a bigger house for all those kids.”
“I’d like that.”
I press a kiss to his mouth, and then he pulls back. Taking my hand, he leads me into the diner. “Time to feed my wife and kid.”
His wife.
His kid.
I place my hand over my stomach and swallow back the emotions.
My husband.
Our child.
I’m so thankful. I’m overflowing with gratefulness for this man and another chance at being a mother.
It was a long and hard road to get here. It’s a road that brought me to Alex Jackson. I’d walk that road again, but only for him.
THE END
JUST A NOTE FROM ME…
This book is so close to my heart.
I got to deal with a lot while writing it. If you’re in a dark place, I hope it will offer you some sense of comfort.
Please, stay strong! It will get better.
You’re priceless.
Don’t let anyone make you feel worthless.
Hugs,
Michelle.
ENEMIES TO LOVERS SERIES
Heartless, Novel #1 ~ Carter Hayes & Della Truman
Reckless, Novel #2 ~ Logan West & Mia Daniels
Careless, Novel #3 ~ Jaxson West & Leigh Baxter
Ruthless, Novel #4 ~ Marcus Reed & Willow Brooks
Shameless, Novel #5 ~ Rhett Daniels & Evie Cole
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Michelle is a Bestselling Romance Author who loves creating stories her readers can get lost in. She loves an alpha hero who is not afraid to fight for his woman.
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Sheldon, you hold my heart in your hands. Thank you for being the best son a mother can ask for.
To my beta readers, Morgan, Kelly, Kristine, Laura, and Leeann - thank you for being the godparents of my paper-baby.
A special thank you to Neda and her team from Ardent Prose for handling my PR.
Thank you to every blogger and reader that took the time to take part in the cover reveal and release day.
Love ya all tons ;)
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