He appeared his finger to his lips in warning. He cocked his head, listening. A faint fluttering was still audible. The birds were restless. ‘We must hurry,’ he hissed, ‘it could be a revenue man. Make sure you hang on tight. Grab the rope round his neck as we’ll be travelling back fast.’ He spoke from close beside her.
He swung his leg over Thread’s shaggy grey back and Marianne barely had time to scramble onto Bobbin before both donkeys broke into a rapid, bumpy trot heading across the clearing and into the welcome invisibility of the woods. The trees whipped past her face catching her painfully on the cheek several times. She had to draw up her knees and crouch over the animal’s neck in order to avoid further injury.
Once she became accustomed to the lumpy stride she began to enjoy herself. Rushing down tiny tracks at the dead of night wearing boy’s clothes was actually an exhilarating experience.
Then Bobbin swerved violently to avoid a rabbit hole and she felt herself slipping. Desperately she gripped harder and concentrated on staying aboard. Her mouth was dry and her heart threatened to jump out of her mouth. If she fell how would Edward know? He was so far ahead he wouldn’t hear her cries for help. She would be alone in the dark with no idea how to get home.
The journey turned from excitement to horror. She clung on praying desperately she would reach Thorrington Creek without further mishap. This was the longest ride of her life. The donkeys kept up their rapid trot, the route so well known to them they needed no moon to light their way.
When she thought she could bear no more and that she would surely fall, Bobbin’s pace slackened. Thank God, the nightmare was almost over! When the beast dropped to a rapid walk she rolled sideways onto the grass her stomach roiling. She remained prone, her face pressed into the damp grass thanking her maker that she was once more on terra firma. The donkey vanished into the darkness but she could hear him greeting his stable mate.
Glad she didn’t have to walk far she turned and pushed herself up. She became aware of the night sounds. There was the screech of a small owl, the rustle of a creature in the undergrowth, the sharp bark of a fox and the gentle slap of the water against the muddy shoreline.
She regained her feet and set off to find Edward. The narrow path tucked in beside a thick hedge led directly to the field.
He was waiting for her. ‘That was an exciting ride. Did you enjoy it?’
She laughed. ‘No, I did not! I was terrified. If I’d fallen you would never have found me. I
thought donkeys were sedentary animals. Why do they rush back in that extraordinary way?’
‘Come into the shed and I’ll show you.’
She did as he asked, ducking through the small doorway. Edward kindled a lantern. She stared round with interest. Apart from the tack they had removed earlier from their mounts there were several stout wooden boxes. He opened the lids with a flourish.
‘Oats - donkeys love them. There are also apples, carrots, potatoes - whatever I can find in the outhouse at home. Charles discovered they would hurry back if they knew a delicious feast awaited them.’
Marianne could hear them stamping and snuffling impatiently in the paddock outside eagerly anticipating the treat to come. Once the donkeys were contentedly munching she collected Sultan and saddled up.
‘What took you so long inside the old mill, Edward, I was becoming worried?’
‘I have to sweep the floor and scatter soil and dust before leaving. If anyone looked in the hoof prints would be a certain giveaway.’
‘Of course, I should have thought of that.’
Back on Sultan Marianne finally relaxed; the danger was over and she could enjoy riding on a warm summer’s night with a good friend to keep her company. ‘Listen, can you hear the nightingales?’
They paused for a moment to enjoy the trills and soaring notes. Then chattering quietly they resumed their journey. They were about a mile from Frating Hall when Sultan threw up his head and whickered loudly.
Edward’s breath hissed between his teeth. ‘Customs men. It’s too late to hide; we’ll have to
brazen it out. Keep moving, it’ll look suspicious otherwise. We’re two young men back from the inn. You stay behind me and make sure no-one sees your face.’
Marianne’s delight in the evening vanished. She sat down into the saddle and pulling her cap more firmly over her eyes. They heard voices and jangling bits and a group of five or six heavily armed men appeared in the lane in front of them.
Edward reined in. She urged her horse up behind him. A dark figure separated from the others and rode towards them.
‘Is that you, Edward? What in the name of God are you doing prowling about at this time of night?’
Icy tremors shot down her spine at the sound of the all too familiar voice. Edward, however, relaxed. He believed he was facing a quite different man to the reality.
‘Sir Theodore? Cutting up a lark with the excise men? I’ve been visiting in Great Bentley - the parents are out you know.’ It worked. A young man would use such an opportunity to get up to mischief.
Theo chuckled. ‘Then you have left your return a tad late, my boy. Lord and Lady Grierson arrived back some time ago. I suggest you keep your head low. Goodnight to you.’
All would have been well if Sultan had not greeted Lucifer as they rode past. Instantly suspicious Theo swung his horse across, blocking their escape. He leaned forward and Marianne heard his sharp intake of breath but he said nothing, pulling his mount aside to let them trot on.
Neither spoke until the horses were turned out and the tack replaced where it should be.
‘I’m sorry, Marianne, but Sir Theodore recognized you.’ He was stating the obvious.
‘Please, don’t remind me, Edward. For all his easy-going appearance my guardian is a stickler for the proprieties. He will rouse himself to ring a fine peal over us tomorrow.’
‘Surely not?’ Edward allowed this unpleasant news to sink in. ‘He will tell my father?’ She nodded. ‘Then there will be hell to pay in the morning. Thank God tonight was almost the end of it.’
‘Almost? I thought you said it was finished, that this was the last delivery?’
He patted his waistcoat. ‘It was, but remember I have these letters to deliver on the first, when the boat comes. Then it will be done.’
The side door was open and they slipped in and returned to their respective chambers. Marianne hastily removed her disguise, bitterly regretting her stupidity. She should not have ridden Sultan— a huge grey gelding was too distinctive. If she had taken any other horse they might have got away with it.
She bundled the boy’s garments into the bag they had come in then pushed them into the back of her closet. She blew out the single candle and climbed into bed. Even the sweet song of the nightingales had begun to pall when dawn’s pale light arrived.
Jane, came with her morning chocolate at eight o’clock. ‘Good heavens, miss, you startled me, sitting in the window like that. Have you been awake long?’
‘I couldn’t sleep.’ She paused, considering, before continuing. ‘I’ve something shocking to tell you Jane. It will be your job to tell John when he returns for I’m too ashamed to do so myself.’
The jug or chocolate slopped over the edge as Jane set down the tray. ‘Whatever have you been up to, miss? What have you done that’s so bad? Had I better sit to hear this?’
Jane and John Smith had been like parents to her all her life and she both loved and respected them and told them everything. ‘Edward and Charles have been helping the smugglers. The money they earned each month has kept this household from ruin for the best part of two years. With Charles laid up I had to assist Edward last night and on my return Cousin Theo recognized me.’
‘Not with contraband?’
‘No, thank God, we were on our way home when we met the excise men. For some reason he was out with them otherwise all would have been well.’
‘I can hardly believe what you’ve told me. A few weeks ago you wouldn’t have
considered doing such a rash thing. Your name’s not the only thing you’ve changed.’
‘I can’t understand myself. It’s as though my life at Upton Manor never existed. It’s extraordinary but I feel I’ve lived here and been part of this family for ever.’
Jane sniffed. ‘That’s as maybe, miss, but it doesn’t excuse last night’s behaviour. What were you thinking of, to draw attention to yourself in such a way? You were sent here to avoid scandal not become a smuggler.’
Marianne smiled. ‘Hardly that, Jane. If I hadn’t helped, Edward and Charles would have been exposed and the whole family brought to ruin. I could not refuse in those circumstances, could I?’
‘I suppose not. What will happen now? Did the customs men recognize you?’
‘No, only Cousin Theo did, but he said nothing. I’m certain none of them connected us with anything illegal. We were merely two young men returning from a jaunt somewhere.’
‘Then all may yet be well. You can sweet talk Sir Theodore, he’ll not stay cross for long - it might spoil the cut of his jacket.’
Marianne’s smile was false. ‘But he might inform Lord Grierson and Edward will be in hot water too.’
‘Serves him right. But Lord Grierson is a fair-minded man, he’ll not deal harshly with his boy. After all, taking a midnight ride is not such terrible thing, is it?’
Marianne swallowed. ‘Not for him, but if Sir Theodore tells Lord Grierson that he took me along I shudder to think what will happen. Is Edward too old for a beating?’
‘Good heavens, yes, he’s as tall as Lord Grierson, a fully grown man almost. Don’t fret, it’s not so bad. I expect you will soon be laughing about all this.’
Later Edward appeared at her parlour dressed smartly for a change. ‘I have had a summons to Bentley Hall. I expect I’ll get a bear garden jaw but nothing worse - just remember we went out for a ride nothing more and we’ll come about safely.’
As he departed he reached into his pocket and handed her a note. She recognised the black scrawl instantly. With shaking hands she opened the paper and discovered that her guardian was sending his carriage to collect her at ten o’clock.
After an hour of nervous pacing, the time had come to leave. Jane had persuaded her to wear her most fetching outfit, a pale gold sprigged muslin with an underskirt of russet damask. She knew it suited her to perfection and the tiny matching bonnet framed her face and made her eyes appear bigger. She hoped her appearance might soften Cousin Theo’s heart. She had detected a decided glint in his eye when he looked at her sometimes, not dissimilar to the looks the military gentlemen had given her that fateful Saturday at Great Bentley.
Her nervousness was causing her stomach to lurch unpleasantly and her hands were clammy. Neither Edward nor Jane would understand how much she was dreading the coming interview for they didn’t know Cousin Theo’s true character.
The drive to Bentley Hall was over too quickly. She was ushered up the marble steps and informed respectfully that Sir Theodore was waiting in the library. She waved away the footman eager to escort her. She knew the way well enough.
Should she knock or walk in unannounced? She decided politeness dictated she would ask permission to enter. She bunched a fist and rapped rather more loudly than she had intended on the library door.
Chapter Thirteen
She had no need to press her ear to the door to hear his command to enter. Her legs were trembling so badly she scarcely had the strength to push the door open. She left it ajar and raising her head faced the man who had demanded she attend on him.
One look at his face was enough— she would not stay to be berated or worse, she would come back when he had calmed down.
‘Close the door, Marianne. You would not wish us to be overheard.’ To disobey him was out of the question. She didn’t hesitate. She pushed the heavy door shut.
She moved a few steps searching for a chair to sit on for she did not think her legs could hold her upright much longer. There was a single wooden seat marooned in the centre of a sea of polished boards. He nodded towards it and she slunk over and sat down fiddling with her skirts to allow time to compose herself.
The silence stretched. She could hear the clock ticking, the birds singing in the garden and still he did not speak. She couldn’t bear it. She looked up and wished she hadn’t.
His eyes bored into hers, pinning her like a butterfly to a board and she was unable to break the connection. He began pleasantly enough.
‘I believe I told you, was it only last week, that I had never struck a woman?’
She would not cast up her accounts for a second time. She felt the sour taste in her mouth and closed her eyes immediately feeling better now she couldn’t see him glaring at her.
‘I believe,’ he continued conversationally, ‘that I am about to break that rule.’ She sunk lower in her chair and shivered. ‘Going out dressed as a boy in the middle of the night was the height of stupidity. If you had been recognized by any but me your reputation would be ruined and Edward forced to offer for you.’
At his last remark her eyes flew open and intemperate words flew out. ‘Marry Edward? Don’t be ridiculous— he’s only sixteen.’
That was a mistake. He seemed to grow and his jaw hardened and his fists clenched. He was going to carry out his threat, turn her over his knee and spank her like a child. Her back pressed against the chair as she watched him approach.
Then her fear vanished to be replaced by a fury equal to his own. How dare he threaten her? Who was he to criticize her behaviour? She leapt to her feet sending the chair crashing to the floor and stepped towards him.
‘Don’t dare to raise a hand to me, sir, I am not a child. And you are not my true guardian. Your role is nominal. Lord Grierson is my adopted father; he is the only man who has the right to discipline me.’
They stood inches apart and the sparks of rage flickered between them igniting a different kind of heat. Before she realized his intention his arms were around her and his mouth closed over hers. His tongue slid persuasively back and forth across her lips and a hand ran up her spine to cup the back of her head, holding her a willing prisoner in his embrace.
Unused to kisses of any sort she didn’t understand that he had already overstepped what was permissible between an unmarried couple. Her blood was fizzing around her body and every inch of her, pressed so close to his hard frame, was seared by delightful warmth.
Her arms slid of their own volition from their position pressed hard against his chest to link behind his neck. Her questing fingers buried themselves in the silky hair that curled around his collar.
*
Her response encouraged him. He tilted her head back and when her mouth opened he deepened his kiss. His hot tongue slid inside her mouth exploring every crevice. Her knees buckled and as she began to collapse he swept her up and strode to the padded settle. His desire was pushing him to take liberties that were quite unacceptable. He put her down gently. Her eyes were closed, her mouth swollen from his kisses, her perfect bosom striving to escape the confines of her bodice. She looked so beautiful - so desirable - so innocent.
He froze, horrified by what he’d been about to do. This was a young girl, not a married woman looking for an illicit affair and he had been about to make love to her. Take the one thing she must keep if she was not to be cast aside by society as used goods.
Her eyes flicked open. He stared down at her trying to regain control.
‘Theo?’
Her voice was soft, husky; it took all his strength of mind not to drop down and take what was being so freely offered. He didn’t answer, he couldn’t, not yet, not until he was calm, until his heart had stopped hammering and his breathing returned to normal.
He moved back, putting a safe distance between them and watched as she sat up a look of confusion on her face. She didn’t realize what had almost happened, how appalling his behaviour was, how any decent gentleman would now be on his knees begging her hand in
marria
ge. But he could not do the honourable thing, until his mission was accomplished he had to remain incognito and it broke his heart to do so.
*
Marianne watched the play of emotions running across Theo’s mobile face and for a second was puzzled and couldn’t read the signs. Then she understood or thought she did. He was ashamed of taking advantage of her and didn’t know how to apologize.
She smiled; at least he wasn’t angry with her. Being kissed so passionately was infinitely preferable to being beaten. ‘Theo, it’s all right. I’m not offended by what happened. This was as much my fault as yours. I didn’t ask you to stop. That was wrong of me. But we were both so angry and love is sometimes akin to hate, is it not?’
She waited for his answer but he remained mute. She swung her legs off the settle and stood up beginning to feel a trifle uncomfortable. ‘Theo, what’s wrong, why are you staring at me so oddly? Have you not forgiven me for last night?’
Finally his expression softened and he stepped forward holding out his hands to her. Trustingly she took them. Things were going to be all right.
‘Marianne, sweetheart, I don’t know quite how to say this without causing offence.’ She stiffened and tried to remove her hands. ‘No, listen to me, please. I shouldn’t have used you so shamefully. I behaved unforgivably. I most sincerely beg your pardon. Can you forgive me?’
She was perplexed by his statement. ‘Why are you apologizing? Have we done something wrong? It didn’t feel wrong—it felt absolutely right.’
‘This is so hard to explain. You’re such an innocent. What we did is only considered acceptable between married people. Now do you understand?’
She stepped back and he was forced to release her. ‘I see. What you are telling me is that a gentleman would feel obliged to offer to marry me if he had done as you did.’ He didn’t reply but his eyes flashed and his throat convulsed as he swallowed. ‘This was my punishment for misbehaving? For calling you ridiculous?’ She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. ‘I believe I would have preferred to have been beaten.’ With quiet dignity she shook out her tangled skirts and collecting her dropped reticule, walked, head high to the door.
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