"As part of his plea bargain, he's been helping to reverse engineer Ygnaza tech," Neutrino said in his default authoritarian tone. "He came across something of use to you. He doesn't actually know when your birthday is, just that you must have one." That last part was a lie. Omicron was a genius. He'd seen my face unmasked, and that same face had been plastered on the news with my civilian identity when the Morlocks abducted me. Putting it together would not be beyond him.
"We checked it for any sign of malicious intent," Dad said. "As far as we can tell, it is exactly what he claims it is."
Suspicious that Omicron would do anything nice for the guy who hounded him into prison, I cautiously picked up the box. I unwrapped it, spotting the subtle signs that someone else had cut the original tape and re-wrapped the box. Opening the thin cardboard box inside, I found a wad of tissue paper. Pulling it out, a smaller object fell to the table. Wrapped in a slip of paper, it had the signature red and black coloration of Omicron's recent work. I unrolled the paper.
"Good behavior buys time off," it read. "This remote controls a certain category of cerebral implants. Sweet dreams. - Dr O."
He knew exactly who I was. Both Dad and Neutrino knew he knew too. I was torn between my distrust of the amoral scientist, and the prospect of being able to sleep after having been awake for so long.
"We put it through the ringer looking for any trace of a secondary function or alternate integrated device," Dad said. "None of the brains at Future Products could find anything."
"Still, it's from Doctor Omicron. I wouldn't put it past him to hide something in plain sight." Staring at the little slip of circuitry, I couldn't bring myself to let it go. The only thing that marched through my mind was a parade of times I wished for sleep, or couldn't be put under for surgery. Mini-Uth-sk's taunting prodding my forebrain, I tightened my grip about the device.
Mini-Uth-sk woke me as Dad lifted me off the floor and back into my seat. "What happened?" I asked.
"You turned it on," Donny said.
"And promptly passed out," Nora added.
"Sweet dreams indeed," I said.
"So he was pranking you?" Omegaburn asked.
I gave a weak grin. My insomnia wasn't that well known, as it was too closely tied to being Travis Colfax.
"Beats vowing bloody revenge," I said. Nora handed me the device under the table. "When we took him in, he said he needed the rest. I guess this was his idea of a joke."
"That got past our screeners?" Wolfjack asked. Dad ignored him. I tried to think of a plausible excuse that didn't include my insomnia, but got interrupted when the door opened.
"I'm sorry I'm late." The girl who stepped in looked to be about fifteen or sixteen by my best guesstimate. Her brown hair was just past shoulder length, and a bit wild as she fought to contain it in a ponytail. Her white mask was a little too small, and I gave myself even chances of being able to recognize her without it. Her costume was mostly white, changing to a pale gray at the knees and elbows. The sigil in the middle of her chest was a colon and open parenthesis. After a moment I realized that it was the 'sad face' emoticon. "I had trouble finding a ride, so I ended up taking the bus, then I had to find a place to change-"
Neutrino snapped his fingers, and she stopped talking. "You could have stopped with I'm sorry I'm late," he said.
"Sorry," she said. Having tied her ponytail, her hands fidgeted in front of her.
"I don't think we've met," Donny said, standing up.
"I'm-" She clamped her mouth shut and turned slightly red. Probably because she had almost blurted out her civilian name.
"This is Ersatz," Neutrino said. "Until we find her a suitable traineeship, she is my sidekick."
"You took a new sidekick?" I asked, the motion of my eyebrow hidden behind my mask and the goggles on my forehead.
"Everyone else was too busy, or too inexperienced to serve as a mentor," Neutrino said. I wanted to call him out just to egg the old man on, but I don't think Neutrino has a life outside the community. He wouldn't have un-retired five times if he did.
"Why are you called 'replacement'?" Wolfjack asked.
"You see-" she started.
"That's a rather long story," Neutrino said.
"No it's not. I have the power to copy powers - after a fashion."
"If you let her start listing the conditions and caveats, we'll be here all night."
Ersatz shot Neutrino a look, but didn't resume speaking. Standing, Donny pulled up a new chair and put it next to his. I could practically see every thought biology sent through his brain as Ersatz sat down. She, however, looked oddly oblivious. I wondered at how sheltered her upbringing must have been.
"Shouldn't Mister Thirty-Eight be here?" Nora asked. I looked around at the guests. The odds that she'd simply overlooked Jack were low, but I had to double-check.
"He said he would be," Dad said.
I pulled out my phone and called Jack.
"Hello?" he said.
"Busy?"
"Not that I know of."
"Pop quiz - what's today?"
"Monday?"
"Monday the what?"
"The fift... Oh!" Jack hung up.
"He's on his way," I said.
"You mean you don't have some fancy communicators?" Ersatz asked.
"To do what a phone already does?" I asked. "We could, but to what end?"
She frowned. The question bounced around almost visibly inside her head. The idea of a boring yet practical answer seemed to conflict with her image of what we did. I don't think she was stupid, but the dissonance needed time to process. I tried to remember a time when misconceptions about the hero life ran as rampant through my head. I think I was nine. I put the phone away as an iota of disappointment crept into her expression.
A quiet tone of three beeps sounded. I couldn't pinpoint where it came from. When it sounded again, Dad turned towards the side wall. "What is it, Shiva?"
A blue-white hologram appeared by the door. It was a flat panel bearing a horizontal line. A voice followed soon thereafter, the line turning into a waveform to match. The voice was patently synthetic and monotone. "I know you instructed me not to interrupt, but there is a priority message for you. Given the content, I believed it imprudent to wait."
"Who is Shiva?" I asked.
"I am the building's central computer," the voice said. "If a desktop can be a tiny god, I must be a large one."
"I'll take the message in the next room," Dad said, stepping out. The hologram panel disappeared.
"Is Shiva sentient?" I asked.
"That depends on what metric you use," Neutrino said. "It certainly acts like it is."
"Xiv," Nora whispered. "What's the message about?"
"I can't hear text," Xiv said.
Nora's costume hid her expression, but knowing her, she was probably frowning. Dad poked his head into the room long enough to motion to Neutrino and Omegaburn. They followed him out of the room. Several people were waiting anxiously, eyes on Xiv. "He says there's been a breakout from the county jail and is asking if they can check it out since they can fly and aren't too closely tied to the birthday boys." Xiv paused, stealing a nervous glance towards where Torquespiral sat. The venerable hero didn't show signs of disapproval. "Neutrino has already agreed for the both of them."
"I wouldn't worry too much then," Torquespiral said. "The matter will soon be under control. Now, we still have a celebration to attend to." He looked at Donny. "I do believe it's your turn."
"This one," Xiv said, sliding a small box across the table to Donny. The tag was written in Xiv's messy scrawl.
"From Xiv and Mister Spiral," Donny read.
"His idea, I just financed it," Torquespiral said. Unwrapping and opening the box, Donny extracted a key. He didn't i
mmediately recognize the pattern.
"What is it a key to?" he asked.
"Last year, your brother wrecked Neutrino's car," Torquespiral said.
"Put that way, it sounds like I was driving," I said. "I was thrown into the hood."
"He was going to junk it, but I bought it off of him and had it fixed up. Xiv is convinced that sixteen should be an automotive birthday." Xiv gave one of his off-putting fanged grins. Ersatz almost recoiled from the sight.
"I guess I need to get a permit now," Donny said. "Thank you both."
"He originally bought that car when I became his sidekick. After I went solo, he almost never drove it," Torquespiral said. "Do try to take care of it."
Ersatz gave a wide-eyed stare at Torquespiral. "You were his sidekick? I thought he was a legacy," she said.
"No, dear girl. I can share a lot of stories, but not during the party."
"Sorry," Ersatz said, shrinking back into her chair.
"My new outfit has an advantage over the old one," Donny said.
"What's that?" I asked.
"Pockets," he said, slipping the key into his trouser pocket. More than one of us smiled, and a few even chuckled.
"Since you don't have a permit, how are you going to get it back to the west coast?" Nora asked.
"Actually," Donny said. "I was seriously debating moving back home. I don't really fit in with the Elementals."
"Did you ever?" Nora asked.
"Wood is a classical element in eastern traditions," I said. "So thematically, it worked." I wanted to steer the conversation away from the reasons why Donny and the All-Star Elementals didn't mesh. We had no proof to back it up. "It's a bit early to go solo. Who were you thinking of tagging along with?"
"I hear a certain team is going to be shorthanded come fall when a certain speedster starts college. So I figured I'd apply to take her place."
"You know that's a membership vote subject to board approval, right?"
"I'm sure I can win over the membership and get them to help me convince the board."
"I'd suggest getting it in before the upcoming election," Torquespiral said. "Business like that gets put off during the shuffle after a new board is empaneled."
"Good to know," Donny said, "I hadn't thought about that." At first it seemed counterintuitive, since most elected officials were too busy in the run up to an election to handle mundane orders of business. But, someone who actively campaigned to be on the fund board was less likely to get the position. Members tended towards the paranoid, and anyone who wanted the job that badly just had to have an ulterior motive.
Dad came back into the room with Jack not far behind. "What did I miss?" Jack asked. Donny fished the key out of his pocket and held it up. He wore the widest, cheesiest grin I'd ever seen on his face. "What's that to?"
"Neutrino's old Galaxie Skyliner," Torquespiral said.
"He still had that thing?" Jack asked.
"After I went solo, he didn't put too many miles on it."
Dad put a hand on Donny's shoulder. "You realize that's a stick shift, right?" Donny's smile ebbed slightly.
"He's picking on you," I said. "You don't know how to drive anyway, what difference does it make?" Donny laughed, and put the key back in his pocket again.
Through the back of my mind, I spent the rest of the night debating if I should use Omicron's remote. On one hand, I'd been up for the better part of nine months. I was lucky I wasn't crazy. Or was I? Doctor Lindenbaum didn't think I was fit for service. But, regarding where it came from, to its creator, the word ethics was merely a theoretical term. He'd killed ten people that I knew of. But I still used his forcefield generating glove. In the end, I set up a timer with my wrist computer. The weight of nine months of wakefulness pulled my eyelids closed the moment Mini-Uth-sk was silenced. My muscles slackened and the world vanished. I felt dead. It was the same dreamless skittering away of time that had caused me to misplace an hour and a half.
I wanted to scream at Mini-Uth-sk when he woke me. It didn't feel like nearly enough sleep, and I woke up on the floor. I felt sore from the position I'd been laying in.
Though awake, my morning felt a bit hazy until I was descending the elevator into the base. The smell of burnt food was the first thing to get into my mind as I entered the residential dome. The occasional piece of colorful language led me to figure out what happened. With me asleep, someone had tried to cook breakfast. It clearly hadn't ended well. It shouldn't have surprised me that it was Pam. Due to his dietary requirements, Nick only made his own food. Jennifer wasn't the sort to actually cook. Xiv didn't know how, and no one else was there.
"I give up!" Pam said. "Help me turn this thing off." I walked into the kitchen and turned off the stove. Pam glared at me. "Don't say anything."
I didn't say anything. I just picked up the spatula and scraped the surface down. Our cooktop was the same sort you'd find in a diner or small restaurant. Disposing of the charred remnants of Pam's attempt, I set about cooking a replacement.
"Where did you learn how to cook, anyway?" she asked.
"Home," I said. Someone had to, and I was the dependable one. I left that part unsaid.
Pam watched over my shoulder, trying to figure out what cues I was using without actually having to resort to asking for help. It had to be a matter of pride. I didn't hold it against her, I just plated her meal and handed it over. I saw a few choice jokes troll through her mind, but she opted not to crack them. She just took the plate into the mess and sat down. As the rest of the team wandered in, either from their rooms or wherever they were staying off-site, I watched them congregate around the table.
"The wrecked space where we found fearless leader was reserved to one Owen Dekker," Jennifer said.
"You mean Dekker is his real name?" I asked.
"Either that, or he got really into his alias. But who'd choose Owen?"
"And, did you check to see how many people by that name are in the city?" Ixa asked.
"No, not yet," Jennifer said. "And the Fund has asked me to help with some sort of special project."
"I can handle it," Pam said.
"Research only," Ixa said, "Regulations say you can't solo yet."
"You have my word," Pam said. Ixa nodded.
"I do not currently have any information," Ixa said, "But I've not exhausted all my avenues."
Part 11
I stared at Doctor Lindenbaum, the silence gripping the atmosphere in the office. He didn't seem to care. It was a long silence. "Why?" I finally asked.
"Why what?"
"Why bar me from active service?"
"To give you more free time. You've clearly been under stress." His monotone still grated on my nerves, almost as much as the blatant lie. He knew I wasn't stupid enough to believe it. "Shall we pick up our conversation where we left off, or shall we start a new one?"
"As I recall, we were on the part where I ignore you until you go away."
"You know it doesn't work that way," Carl said. "Though I would still like to know what lasted ninety minutes."
"It's not important."
"Important enough that you chose to stop speaking. I'd say that's something significant."
I narrowed my gaze slightly. Carl remained expressionless, though I had little doubt he saw.
"I've had enough people in my head lately, I don't have room for you too."
"Oh? It sounds like you've been leaving a lot out of your reports to the fund. A psychic intrusion is something that should really go on record."
"I haven't gotten to filing it yet. Someone restricted my login to the Fund network."
"That happens when you're inactive. So what happened when they were in your head?"
"We had a very confusing conversation in a very weird environment. S
ort of like the two of us, only the gargoyle and the coma kid were less aggravating."
Gruefield 18 (Tarnished Sterling Omnibus) Page 74