“Who are you going to get to work the nets?” Maddox asked.
Alice smiled. “We thought you might like to, since it was your idea. And you’d be closer to home.”
Maddox bit the inside of his cheek. If he was handling the nets, they’d expect him to be close by. They’d expect him to take over this responsibility instead of scavenging.
Which meant he wouldn’t have time to see Juno.
But didn’t he owe his community that much? He owed his dad, at the very least, to help take care of his mom. She already had enough to deal with from the people across the border and what they’d done to her husband. He should be trying to take care of her instead of running off to Juno.
“This is perfect,” Theo said, clapping him on the shoulder. “Give you a break from all that scavenging—we can send someone else out.”
“It’s…” Words lodged in Maddox’s throat. What was he supposed to say? He didn’t want the job? “It’ll take time to get the nets right.”
Alice nodded. “Of course.”
“We’ll help,” Theo said, watching him with curiosity. “I think we should be able to figure it out pretty quickly.”
“We’ll have to scavenge for supplies to make the nets—markers for where we set them, probably,” Maddox said, though with less enthusiasm in his voice.
That was right, though, he reminded himself. He’d have to find material for the nets, which meant heading out of the border to look. He could still have time with Juno and do his duty, couldn’t he?
“Absolutely,” Alice said.
“I’m sure we’ve got something to use from our own supplies,” Theo said, crossing his arms.
Maddox almost choked. “No—I mean, I’ve looked already. There’s not much. I’ll have to look around.”
He waited, afraid Theo really did know the truth. If not about Juno, then about the missing supplies. At least one of the secrets he was keeping.
“I’m sure you’ll be able to find what you need,” Alice said, touching his arm.
Maddox pulled in a breath, leaning in closer to her and forgetting for a moment about all those secrets. He wished he could go back in time and take away everything that had hurt her. Wished he could bring his father back and fix the world they lived in. If only…
Alice smiled at him before she walked back across the beach.
“I didn’t know you still went out to scavenge,” Maddox said.
Theo shrugged. “Me and James wandered over to the bridge a few days ago to see if we could find more flashlights.”
Maddox’s shoulders tensed. He was at the bridge with Juno a few days ago. But if Theo had seen something, he would have stepped forward, wouldn’t he?
His stomach still felt uneasy, and then it lurched when Theo reached to his waistband.
“We found this, too,” Theo said.
He pulled out a gun, small and shiny. Something like what the Enforcers—the guards stationed at the border between the Light Side and Darkside—might have.
“Where did you get that?” Maddox asked.
“I told you. We found it.”
Found it? More like stole it. He’d never seen a gun lying around in all his years of scavenging. He’d never seen flashlights, either. They were a rare commodity.
“What are you going to use that for?” Maddox asked.
“Protection, of course.”
“Against who?”
Theo laughed and returned the gun to his waistband. “Against the others.” His gaze traveled to the border. “Just in case.”
Maddox swallowed. How was he supposed to tell his brother he thought there was more going on than what it seemed?
Theo still saw things in black and white. The other side killed his father. Period.
Which meant they deserved whatever they got in return.
But it wasn’t that simple. And not everyone over there was the enemy.
Theo clapped him on the shoulder. “It’s just a precaution. Come on, let’s get back.”
Maddox trudged slowly on the beach behind him, all the while, his eyes locked on the bulge of the gun at Theo’s waist.
If things kept going in this direction, there might never be peace.
And he might never be safe with Juno.
Chapter Seventeen
Juno
She had to clean the fish Cam brought in that morning, help in the garden, and deliver vegetables to the outer homes on the opposite side of the beach—all before she could sneak away without being noticed.
It was the longest day of her life, waiting impatiently to run off to the bridge to see Maddox. It shocked her how hard it had been not seeing him yesterday and shocked her how much more she wanted to see him today.
Not an hour passed that she didn’t think about him, of his lips and his eyes, of his rough hand linked with hers. Of how he always seemed to be interested in everything she said.
He’d stare at her as she talked, making her feel like she was the only person in the world.
Sometimes she even forgot about her community and her family. She forgot that they were supposed to be living for each day, taking care of each other. Surviving.
What good was survival if you didn’t have someone to share it with?
It only made her that much more determined to leave the community. Every day she stashed away more food and more supplies so she’d have something to take with her when she left. Once she had enough, and she had the rat traps Maddox was helping her build, she’d be ready.
Then she’d truly be free.
Juno blew out a slow breath. But then she’d also be on her own, and everything would change.
“What are you thinking about?” Pillar asked as they dropped off the rest of the vegetables.
“Do you ever get lonely?” Juno blurted it out before she could change her mind. She still had to tell her friend she was leaving. And maybe, just maybe, she’d build up the courage to tell her about Maddox, too.
“Lonely?” Pillar swung the empty basket as they walked. “What do you mean? Because you’ve been gone so much?”
Juno bit her cheek. That’s not what she’d meant at all, but she had been gone a lot. She used to spend all her time with Pillar, and now she rarely saw her. It didn’t help that she’d had to find a new home—just an empty shack on the other side of the community. At least she had blankets and a lantern for the dark nights.
“It’s…no, that’s not what I mean. I’m sorry,” she said, glancing at her friend. “I know I’ve been gone a lot.”
“What are you doing? I mean, yeah, you’re scavenging, but…is that all?”
Juno’s stomach clenched. No, that wasn’t all. And she couldn’t keep it a secret forever. Not from Pillar.
But the words still stuck in her mouth like glue.
“I needed…space,” Juno said, then added quickly, “Not from you.”
Pillar kept her eyes locked on the street as they walked, her mouth turned down at the corners. “I’m really sorry. I told Mom that she should let you come back and…and…”
“No.” Juno glanced at Pillar, hoping she hadn’t sounded too abrupt. “I mean, don’t worry about that. Please. It’s not your fault that I moved. And maybe…well, maybe it’s better this way. I need to be out on my own.”
Pillar shook her head. “It’s not fair. I want you to come back. And Cam isn’t as good at fishing as you,” she added with a rueful grin.
Juno smiled, her spirit lifting some. Pillar always knew the right thing to say.
“There’s so much else out there to see, you know?” Juno asked, looking in the direction of the bridge. “More than just the day to day.”
Pillar laughed out loud. “Like what? We’re not exactly living in the Light District over here. There’s not much else that’s interesting.”
“But there is! We just don’t take time to enjoy it—it’s always about who’s going to bring in dinner for the next day and who’s going to cook it and who’s going to clean it all up. I don’t
think I’ve ever heard your parents talk about anything else. They don’t hug or kiss anymore. They—”
She broke off at the grin on Pillar’s face. It was too late to take back what she’d said.
“I see,” Pillar said.
“I don’t think you do.”
Pillar stopped a few blocks from the boathouse. “I do.” She lowered her voice to a whisper, even though no one was paying attention to them. “I know where you’ve been sneaking off to.”
Her throat dried. She forced herself to swallow. There was no way Pillar knew where she’d been going. She couldn’t unless she’d followed her—and Pillar wouldn’t do that.
Pillar’s grin grew wider. “You’ve been sneaking off to see him.”
Juno drew in a sharp breath. “Him who? What? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Him somebody. I don’t know. You’re keeping him a secret.” Pillar stepped closer to Juno and lowered her voice even further. “Is it Cam? I see how he looks at you sometimes. Or—or John. He’s cute. Or maybe—”
“No. Not them. Not anybody. I mean—” She flushed, and then turned back to the street to walk the rest of the way to the boathouse.
Pillar skipped along beside her. “Come on, Juno. I’m your best friend.”
“It’s…” God, she couldn’t keep lying. Yes, she’d been seeing someone. And if it were as simple as that, she might have already told Pillar. Or would she?
Spending time with someone, feeling her heart squeeze every time she saw him—it was so new. So foreign. What if Pillar laughed at her, or didn’t understand?
She barely understood it herself.
But she owed Pillar that much. If she wasn’t going to tell her about leaving the community, she should at least tell her about Maddox.
“I’m going to figure it out eventually,” Pillar said. “You might as well tell me. Do my parents know?”
Juno choked on a laugh, half amused and half horrified. “No, they don’t know. They’d kill me. It’s not…” She swallowed and decided to be honest. “It’s not someone they would expect.”
“I knew it!” Pillar swung her basket in the air like she was celebrating. When she saw Juno’s face, hers went contrite immediately. “I’m sorry. But I knew something was going on. I wish you’d talk to me about it.”
“I’m trying.”
She wanted to break down and tell Pillar everything. But she couldn’t. Not yet.
Pillar put her arm around Juno. “I know. I’m sorry. This is exciting, right? But it’s new, so I get that you’re still trying to figure things out.”
Juno nodded. “I am. I want to talk to you about this.”
“I’m here whenever you’re ready.” They reached the boathouse, and Pillar passed her basket over. “Are you going to…” She waved her hand. “Go see him?”
Juno glanced around to make sure they were alone. “Yes. But you can’t say anything.”
“You know I won’t.”
Juno knew she wouldn’t. She gave her friend a smile. “I’ll tell you everything soon. I promise.”
Pillar nodded. “Okay.”
Juno gave her a quick hug before taking both baskets inside the boathouse and hanging them on the hooks beside the door. She knew Pillar would keep her secret, which made it easier to sneak off to see Maddox. If anyone asked for her, Pillar would just tell them she was scavenging.
That was the truth. She was building her new life, item by item, and it helped that Maddox was a part of that. More than he knew.
Juno ran all the way to the bridge, their usual meeting spot, and skidded to a stop by the beams, out of breath. She ducked underneath, sure she’d find Maddox with the rats. A few of them squeaked as she inched closer, but Maddox wasn’t there. She resurfaced on the other side.
If he wasn’t with the rats or making rat traps, he must be on top. But she didn’t see his satchel, either. She cupped her hands around her mouth and called out his name. She waited for an answer, or for him to peek his head over the edge and tell her to come up, but he didn’t.
With a frown, Juno started to call for him again but saw a few people walking on the other side of the street. She didn’t want to draw any attention. Maddox’s traps were safe for now, but if more people saw them, he’d run the risk of having them stolen.
At least, that was probably what would happen. These people over here by the bridge had to be just as bad off as she was, didn’t they? The only difference was that they were on their own. They didn’t have a community to help them find food and shelter. To help them survive.
Juno swallowed, fear snaking through her belly. Surviving on her own? There were times she thought anything was possible, especially when she was with Maddox. She felt she could take on the world all by herself.
But then she’d come here all by herself, alone, and it would change. She’d worry.
And if she worried about doing this without Maddox, then how was she supposed to survive on her own?
Maddox wouldn’t always be here. He didn’t even know she was leaving.
She glanced around again, gritting her teeth. And it looked like he might not make it today. She should have looked at the post by the beach first, checked for a message.
But they’d been seeing so much of each other, she believed things would continue in their routine.
She ducked back under the bridge to get to the other side, feeling vulnerable for the first time today.
Why did she keep thinking she could rely on people when she really needed to rely on herself?
After the sun had shifted in the sky, and as the shadows grew longer, Juno pushed away from where she leaned against the metal beams. She couldn’t wait all day. She hadn’t had anything to drink since before she delivered the vegetables with Pillar.
Maddox should be here by now. He should have been here before her, actually. She was the one who was late—which was why she’d run so fast to get here. Maybe he already left because she’d taken too long.
But Maddox wouldn’t do that. Would he?
She blew out a breath, trying to clear her mind. It was her fault she was late, but also her fault she’d let herself think that life could be the dream she kept imaging it to be.
Time to go home.
Chapter Eighteen
Maddox
He told himself she was probably gone. Or, hopefully, she’d read his note at the post and knew he was going to be late.
But, knowing Juno, she’d probably gotten there in the morning, like they always did, and then waited the whole day for him to show up.
That’s what he would have done.
Seeing Juno was what he looked forward to most days. He thought she felt the same, but how could he be sure? He knew barely anything about her—only that he wanted to know more. When she talked, it was like nothing else mattered. It made him think of dozens of questions, things he wanted to ask her and things he wanted to know.
It was wrong, all of it. After the talk he’d had with his mom on the beach this morning, he had no idea how he was supposed to keep this up.
Now it was starting to weigh on him, and he was beginning to think it was better to end it for good this time.
As he made his way through the last two buildings that blocked the bridge from view, he saw her. Juno had her head down, watching her feet as she walked away from their meeting spot.
Something sparked inside of him, as it did each time he saw her.
“Juno,” he called, picking up his pace.
She kept walking, shoulders drooped and mouth set in a frown.
He called her name again, and her head snapped up, searching for the sound. When she saw him, her face transformed. She smiled, and even from here he could see the light in her eyes.
His whole body responded to it, all of him wanting to run to her and apologize for not being here sooner. But then he remembered this morning and some of that excitement faded.
Juno met him halfway across the street. “I thought you’d alre
ady left.” She glanced to his shoulder, where he usually carried his satchel. “Or are you coming back?”
“No, I couldn’t make it here this morning.” Maddox cleared his throat when the words came out rough. It wasn’t her fault he’d gotten delayed, even if he felt like looking for someone to blame.
Her smiled faded. “Neither could I.”
So she’d been late, too. She hadn’t been waiting all day for him. That made him feel better and worse at the same time.
It was the first time since he’d kissed her that it felt awkward between them, like there were books of words neither were saying.
“My mom wants me to start putting up nets like yours for fishing,” he finally blurted out.
Her eyes widened. “How does she know about my nets?”
“She doesn’t,” he said hastily, realizing how that sounded. After all, someone had torn apart her nets. “I mean, she knows you guys fish, and we can see your shore from our side. It’s—” Maddox broke off to stop from babbling. “I’m the one who brought it up. Fishing. I thought it would help the community and give us something else to eat every day.”
“Oh. That’s good. But why didn’t you do that before? You could have been fishing this whole time—”
“No, we couldn’t have.” Maddox shifted from one foot to the next, picturing the gun his brother had. Then he thought about the man who’d crossed the border from her side, and what Theo and James had done to him.
That could have been Juno. Or it could be him if he crossed to her side.
Juno folded her arms, a flicker of defiance on her face. “Why not?”
“You can’t tell me you don’t know. The reason why the whole feud started in the first place?”
“No…” When he didn’t answer right away, she glared, surprising him. “It wasn’t easy to get over here today. I have stuff I’m supposed to be doing.”
“So do I. That’s why I was late.”
He frowned. She wasn’t the only one who had to sneak out every time they wanted to meet up. Did she think this was easy for him?
“Then maybe you should get back to it.” She glanced away. “You have fishing to do now, right?”
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