by Toni Aleo
She couldn’t speak, couldn’t even think, as she stayed locked in his gaze. She felt like a fish out of water, gasping for air, trying to figure out what to do next.
“You look amazing, Reese, so beautiful. You haven’t changed at all,” he said, his voice soft and smooth, making her skin break out in gooseflesh.
Her heart hammered against her chest. She couldn’t catch her breath, and she couldn’t trust herself to speak.
He scoffed as he reached out, trying to cup her face, but she backed away some, causing him to smile. “Say something, ReeRee. You’re freaking me out.”
She took in a deep breath and couldn’t believe he had brought out his old nickname for her. Her eyes moved into slits as she took a step towards him, and he smiled. In that very moment, she hated him. How dare he act like he hadn’t ruined her life! Act as if taking his love away from her wasn’t like taking her next breath. How dare he! Her body shook with anger, her heart jackhammering, as her fists clenched and her fingernails bit into her palms. This was the man that ruined her, and she always dreamed of what she would say when she saw him again. She imagined herself kicking him in the gut and telling him to fuck off, that she was better without him, but that wasn’t the case. She didn’t expect to feel like he had pulled out a knife and stabbed her in the chest. She didn’t expect to feel the way she had when she watched him walk away. She hated the way he made her feel, and rage ran through her veins. She wanted to slap him, beat him even, but then she remembered where she was. There were eyes everywhere. People knew her, knew him, and this could not happen. No matter how much she wished for it, she couldn’t risk it. He had chased her from her dreams before, but she would not allow him to ruin her career.
So very quietly, she took another step towards him and whispered, “Fuck you.”
Claire was grinning and coming out of a tight hug from Brian when she turned to look at him. Pride was pouring out of Phillip’s skin as he wrapped her up tightly in his arm, hugging the crap out of her. He had never seen anything so beautiful. Her solo was a masterpiece, but there was something about watching her move with a partner that made her even better. Phillip may not like the kid, but he made Claire a superstar. Kissing her temple, he pulled back and smiled down into her gorgeous, but wearing too much makeup, face. She reminded him so much of his sister that his eyes started to sting. He hoped that in Heaven his mother and sister were watching this moment, the moment when Claire fucking shined, but at the same time, he was mad. They should be here, all of them should be, but because they couldn’t, Phillip was going to make sure this girl knew she was amazing.
“I’m so proud of you.”
She smiled, her cheeks darkening with color as she said, “Thank you.”
“So proud,” he whispered, emotion choking him as he wrapped her back up in a tight hug. He missed his sister and mom so much, but he was thankful to still have Claire within reach. They would always have each other. “I love you so much.”
He felt her freeze in his arms, and then she whispered, “I love you too.”
He closed his eyes tight, hugging her the way she needed to be hugged as he took in a deep breath. His heart was exploding with love, and he didn’t know how to handle his emotion. In one hand, he wanted to cry like a little baby but, since he knew that it might get back to the guys, he went with the other hand, which was to just hold her and bask in this moment. He had been waiting since the first moment she came back into his life for her to accept his love, and he couldn’t believe that this was finally happening.
Could life get any better?
Claire parted from him, and he smiled as she moved out of his arms. “It was great, huh?”
He nodded. “Yeah, it was beautiful and even though you don’t have a shirt on, you did good, guy,” he said, directing it to Brian.
Brian smiled as he cocked his head towards Claire. “It’s all her. She’s spectacular.”
Claire beamed up at him as Phillip glared, but still he said, “Yes, she is.”
“Are you sure we did good?” Claire said, a worried expression on her face as she looked past him.
“Ugh yeah, mind blowing, why?” He laughed as Brian looked towards the direction Claire was.
“Then why does Reese look so mad?”
He looked behind him to see Reese marching towards them, her face red and her lips set in a straight line. Behind her was a tall, blond guy, trying to catch up to her while calling her name.
“I don’t know,” Phillip said as Reese came up to them, hugging Claire tightly and then Brian.
“You guys, that was perfect. Way better than y’all have ever done in practice. I’m so proud of you.”
Brian nodded as Claire exclaimed, “Thanks! We feel good about it.”
“You should, we got this,” she said quickly, sending a glare towards the blond dude.
Phillip wanted to come close to her and ask what was wrong, but that was something he would do if it were known he was in love with her and since that wasn’t known, he stayed where he was. He needed to tell Claire as soon as possible because he wanted to kiss Reese with such an urgency that it scared him. He was convinced that everyone in the room knew he wanted her. She was pissed but, even in that state, she was breathtaking. Despite the straight line her glossed-up lips sat in, she looked classic, wearing a pair of black tights and a pair of red shorts with a long, black sweater that came off her shoulder, showing off some of her back tattoo. Her hair was up in a bun, and her makeup dramatic. She was obviously dressed to impress and boy, did she.
“Everything okay?” Claire asked.
It wasn’t, Phillip knew it wasn’t, but Reese said, “Sure.”
“Reese, can we talk?”
Everyone eyes darted to the guy except Reese, she rolled her eyes. “Why don’t y’all go change and get ready for awards? Good job again.”
They didn’t want to leave her, and hesitantly headed towards the backstage. Phillip didn’t know where to go, so he decided to stay right where he was. He didn’t trust the blond guy, and he also wanted to know what was wrong with Reese.
“There isn’t anything to talk about, Kevin.”
Kevin? Kevin, Kevin? Like the guy that ruined her for the male race?
“I think we can find something. It’s obvious you are angry with me still,” he said in a slow way, like he was drunk or high.
Reese laughed out loud as she shook her head. He knew she wanted to scream, he could read it all over her face, but in the calmest voice, she said, “Are you fucking kidding me? Of course I am! You broke my heart.”
Yup, it was him and instantly, Phillip wanted to kick his ass.
“I apologized,” Kevin pointed out as he shrugged his shoulders.
Reese took in a deep breath through her teeth and sneered. “The hell you did! You looked at me, told me you were married, and that you couldn’t see me anymore.”
“And then I said I was sorry.”
She looked down at the ground and took in a deep breath. Phillip noticed people were looking their way. He wanted to tell them all to fuck off, but he knew that would just bring more attention. When Reese looked back up at Kevin, Phillip studied her profile and was breathless at the sight of her. Her cheeks were dark with color, her eyes glassy, and her bottom lip quivered slightly as she looked up at him.
“Is that what you tell yourself to feel better? Because I remember that night like it was yesterday, and you never said that. All you said was my bad, and then walked away from me like I was nothing but trash. So yes, I am very angry with you and no, we have nothing to fucking talk about.”
With that, she turned on her bright red heels and stormed away. Kevin looked back at him and Phillip scoffed. “Don’t look at me, dude. I would love nothing more than to knock your fucking teeth out of your mouth.”
Phillip shook his head as he went towards him, knocking into him before following after Reese. Was it immature? Sure, but he gave no fucks at all where this guy was concerned. All he cared about was
getting to Reese. He wasn’t sure she knew he was following her since she didn’t look back at him, but he continued to trail her as she turned down a hall that appeared to be vacant. When she stopped and covered her face, leaning against the wall as she took in deep breaths, his heart broke for her. Coming beside her, he mimicked her stance and looked over at her, watching as her tears leaked out from under her hands.
“I can’t believe he thinks that we are cool, that I am fine after the way he did me. He ruined me, you know?” she cried, taking in deep breaths. “I gave him all of me.”
“I know. I’m sorry. He’s a douche.”
She nodded. “I loved him so fucking much. I wanted to have kids with him, get married, and just be happy. He was the prince that I was convinced I needed. He made me so fucking happy, but I should have known something was up. We never left my place, and Piper even said he was sleazy. I was oblivious to it all though. I believed I was the only one he loved but damn it, I was so wrong.” She took in a shaky breath as she wiped her hands along her cheeks. “I just don’t get it. I don’t understand how I could have been so stupid and allowed him to ruin me the way he did.”
Reaching over, Phillip grasped her thigh, squeezing it softly. “You were in love. Everything seems perfect when you’re in love,” he said softly, speaking from the heart, hoping to calm her down.
“I just feel so stupid and disgusting. Like I still feel so guilty for what we did behind her back. They are still together, you know,” she said, looking up at him, her makeup smeared from her eyes, her nose pink and her lips puffy from biting on them to keep her sobs in.
He shrugged. “I don’t know what to say about that, Reese, but I do know he didn’t deserve you.”
Her lip quivered as she took in a shuddering breath. “He didn’t?”
Turning, he leaned into the wall with one shoulder before reaching out to cup her chin. “No, baby, you are too good for him. Too beautiful, so smart and funny, quick on your feet. He’s the slime at the bottom of a trashcan, and you are a star in the sky.”
She smiled. “That’s really corny.”
He laughed, leaning into her, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her closer. “I know. I only do it for you, to make you feel better.”
Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead into his lips. “I hate the way he makes me feel. I’ve been holding all this anger towards him, and I just wish it would go away.”
“Let it go, forget him,” he said quietly against her head. “He is nothing to you now.”
She snuggled closer into him as he said, “Letting him know he still affects you lets him win. You are the winner. Fuck that guy, you didn’t need him then, and you sure as hell don’t need him now. There are a billion fish in the sea, Reese, don’t waste anymore of yourself on that bottom feeder.”
Her fingers ran up his back, cupping around his neck. “You’re right.”
“I know I am. Now stop all this crying and mooning over that asshole and kiss me.”
She smiled. “Well, since you asked so nicely.”
He grinned as she reached up on her tippy toes, touching her lips to his. He closed his eyes, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss. He wanted more than anything for her to realize that he was the award-winning fish in the sea, and that she wanted to reel him in and love him because he could love her the way she deserved and more. Moving his lips slowly with hers, his hands bit into her back. His dick came to life, and he knew that he was about to take her in that hall.
When he lifted her up, she wrapped her legs around his waist as he pressed her into the wall, deepening the kiss, biting at her mouth, not able to get enough. She moved against his hard-on, causing him to groan against her mouth. Smiling against his lips, she looked deep into his eyes as he slid his hands into her shorts, cupping her sweet ass in his hands.
God, he wanted her.
Her eyes were swirling with desire, her chest rising and falling, her breast touching his chest and making it hard for him to catch his breath. The words were right there. He was going to say it. He was going to tell her that he was in love with her but, before he could, she took his mouth with hers, kissing him long and hard. Squeezing her ass, he pushed into her, feeling the heat between her legs and causing her to gasp against his lips. He knew doing this in a hall wasn’t his greatest idea, but he couldn’t stop himself. He needed her. Now.
“Oh my God.”
Reese’s lips froze against his, and Phillip begged the good Lord above to please let what he just heard be a figment of his imagination.
But it wasn’t, and when he pulled his lips away from Reese’s and looked down the hall, he saw the one person he did not want to see.
Claire.
And she was pissed the hell off.
“ARE YOU kidding me? Seriously, Phillip? Seriously?”
Claire was screeching, and it was like nails on a chalkboard. He hadn’t heard her do that in months, and the sound caused his stomach to drop.
“Fuck,” Phillip muttered as he slowly put Reese down, removing his hands from her ass. She was red as a tomato, not looking him in the eye as she looked down at the floor, embarrassed.
“Claire, calm down.”
“You promised! You said you would never get with her!”
Brian came forward, placing his hand on Claire’s shoulder, but she shook him off as Phillip tried to figure out how he was going to fix this. He was pretty sure that wasn’t going to happen.
“Claire—”
“No, you’re a liar!” she screamed before turning and running away.
“Damn it,” he muttered. Reese put her hand on his chest, pushing him to follow her.
“Go.”
“I’m sorry,” he said quickly as he started after Claire.
“Don’t be,” she called out at him as he rushed down the hall. It was hard to find her in the sea of dancers but when he did, he was behind her within seconds, trying to get her to stop, but she wasn’t having it. She ignored him, tears rolling down her cheeks as she rushed through the convention center and then through the door, across the street to the hotel that they were staying at. He didn’t want to cause any more of a scene then they already had, so he followed her, slowly dying inside because she was crying so bad. He tried to gather up what he was going to say, but she was right. He was a liar. Yes, he was a grown man, but he promised he wouldn’t pursue things with Reese and he did. God, they had just fixed things and now this. Why wasn’t he honest before? Why didn’t he just admit what was going on?
Following her into their room, he pulled his beanie off and threw it on the dresser before turning to look at her.
“How could you? You promised!”
He let out a breath, running his hand through his hair before pushing it to the side. “It wasn’t supposed to happen, I know that, but I shouldn’t have to answer for what I do in my private life. Yes, I am wrong for lying to you, Claire, but it really doesn’t affect you.”
Throwing her hands in the air, she screamed, “Are you serious? Yes it does! When you break her heart, like you do every single fucking woman that has ever been in your life, she’ll hate me! I need her. She makes me a better dancer, and she believes in me!”
“That’s bullshit! I have not hurt everyone in my life!”
“Yes, you have! Grandma, Mom, Alana, and me! You can’t stay true to anyone! I’m surprised you’ve lasted this long with me but lookie here, fucking up, like always.”
He took a step towards her, anger bubbling in his chest as he stood toe to toe with her. Everything she was saying was shit but by the defiant way she was looking up at him, he knew that she believed it and that blew his mind. How could she? After everything he had done, after all the ways he had shown he loved her. What had he done wrong?
Taking in a deep breath, he pushed back his tears as he said, “Everything I have done has never been with the intentions of hurting any of you! I did what I had to do!”
“For yourself!”
“That’s
not true! I always thought of you guys. I sent money all the time.”
“Yeah, that’s all we were, a payoff, so that you felt better about yourself.”
That hurt. Trying not to flinch at her words, he said, “How can you say that? That’s not true at all. I had no choice, Claire. I had to get out when I did before they ruined me. I always thought of you and—”
“No!” she screamed, and he actually jumped. Tears fell in heaps down her cheeks, her lips wobbled for only for a second before she was glaring up at him. “You never thought about me. You never thought about how leaving me with Mom was going to affect me! You don’t know half the shit I went through. How I had to fight off men to keep from being touched! How I had to beg people for food, because she spent the money you sent on drugs and anything else she needed. How my grandmother couldn’t bother to care for me. How I had to fight to keep dancing just to feel normal. You never called, you never came to see me, and you just left—”
Her words stopped as a sob ripped through her. She dropped to the ground, holding herself as she took in a deep breath. Tears blurred his eyes as he watched her. Fight off men? Beg for food? Was she fucking kidding him? How could his sister do that to her own daughter? Why did she fight him so bad to keep Claire when it was obvious she didn’t want her? How could he have been so blind, so stupid? Why didn’t he fight harder?
Looking up at him with her beautiful blue eyes drowning in tears, she whispered, “You didn’t fucking care and now, you get stuck with me again. I was starting to believe that you did love me and that you did want to do what was best for me, but then the one thing I ask for you not to do, you do. I don’t want to lose her. You took Alana from me, and now you’ll do the same with Reese.”
Squatting down in front of her, he reached out, placing a hand on her shoulder. She didn’t flinch away; she only looked up at him with the eyes of a scared child. Words couldn’t express his hatred for his sister at that moment, but also the hatred for himself. He was so selfish back then, but he was a kid too. He didn’t know any better then. He was too caught up in his own life, trying to make sure he was good and normal, that all he did was send money and hope that worked, that it made things better for them, but it hadn’t. He had a hand in ruining this girl, and he would forever try to make up for that. He had to but, first, they needed to set some things straight because they couldn’t move forward if she couldn’t let go.