The Sherwood Forest Motel in Garberville was, as Brandee had indicated, literally in the redwood forest, with only the office in an open area near the road. The members of Brandee all had a certain “we're home” feeling wash over them as they unloaded the vehicles. They were inside the boundary of Humboldt County, where Brandee's members had met and founded their group. Surely, this slice of God's country would be the tonic that they all needed to be able to re-group and re-commit to each other and to the group as a whole.
Brandee went inside Room 11 and fell right back to sleep, but Jake found himself to be too restless to sit in the room while his wife slept. He went to Bruce and Suzi's room three doors deeper into the forest. That's where he found, not only Bruce and Suzi, but Diane as well.
“Where's the kid?” Suzi asked Jake.
“I don't know. I thought she was down here with you guys.”
Diane spoke up. “Don't worry about her. I saw her start down one of those walking trails next to the parking lot. She's going for a little hike, I guess.”
Suzi responded, “I wasn't worried. I was going to suggest that we hurry up and change motels while she's gone.”
Diane looked troubled. “Things haven't been the same since she got here, have they? Is it her, though?”
Bruce and Suzi looked at Diane, and said, in unison, “It's her.”
Diane smiled, but continued. “Hear me out. Did Janelle cause the disruption, or did she come along at just the right time? Or just the wrong time, as the case may be? When Suzi got pregnant, or at least told us that she was pregnant, we all got excited. That brought up the question of kids for Jake and Brandee. We all know what happened then. I just wonder if we're blaming Janelle for some things that just aren't her fault.”
Bruce nodded. “Groups get road weary, too. Maybe that was part of it. Maybe you guys were getting tired of my face.”
He paused for a moment, scratching the stubble on his cheek. “Probably not that, though. Maybe you guys were getting tired of Suzi's face.”
With that, Bruce jumped back and sat at the top of the bed, out of Suzi's reach. He had learned to anticipate when she was going to punch him, and she didn't disappoint. Suzi swung a wild right hand, aiming for the shoulder that Bruce had just taken out of her reach.
Jake and Diane smiled at each other. They both felt that Diane had a point, but that Bruce's theory of the group being road weary was spurious at best. How could anyone get road weary when Bruce and Suzi were around to entertain with their antics?
“Diane may have a point,” Jake said. “Janelle will be gone soon, anyway. Then, we won't have her to blame.”
Suzi, having finally managed to pummel Bruce for his unkind words, looked over at Jake. “Do you really think that she's going to leave? I'm beginning to have my doubts.”
Jake looked troubled. The truth was, Suzi was tapping into a very real fear of his. The rift between himself and Brandee had preceded Janelle's arrival, but the way that Brandee had cleaved to Janelle in the wake of the rift was beyond bizarre to Jake. It was like Brandee had pushed him aside in favor of this waif-like creature that had shown up out of nowhere in Grand Junction.
“I don't really know, Suzi,” Jake said. “I know that I hope so.” He looked out of the window just then and saw Janelle emerge from the forest at the end of the walking path. She was headed toward Jake and Brandee's room.
Dinner that night was overcooked topping on undercooked crust from Sicily Pizza. Bruce's assertion that the two cooking errors averaged out to a good pizza was unconvincing to the rest of the group. Shortly after the unsatisfying meal, the traveling party separated to go to their own rooms.
Brandee was in bed shortly after she and Jake had gotten back to Room 11. Sleep was quickly overcoming her, but before it did, she surprised Jake by speaking.
“Have you noticed anything about Janelle?” she said, speaking to Jake with her eyes closed.
Jake had noticed a number of things about Janelle, but didn't know which one to bring up in response to Brandee's question. He had noticed that she had filled his wife's head with mystic mumbo-jumbo. He had noticed that the group dynamic was screwed up with Janelle around. He also knew that these weren't the things that Brandee had in mind, so he decided to volley the question back to her.
“What thing do you have in mind?”
Brandee smiled but kept her eyes closed against the light in the room.
“I think she looks like Angelina Jolie.”
Jake was glad that Brandee's eyes were closed, because he knew that she wouldn't appreciate the look of incredulity that came over his face. He couldn't believe his ears. How did Janelle look different from Angelina Jolie? Let him count the ways:
1) Angelina Jolie has shiny dark hair; Janelle has flat, light brown hair.
2) Angelina Jolie has luminous brown eyes; Janelle has light eyes of indeterminate color.
3) Angelina Jolie has full, luscious lips; Janelle has normal lips, notable only that they are chapped most of the time.
4) Angelina Jolie is sexy as hell; Janelle looked like the dictionary definition of average, if average is decidedly not sexy.
All of these thoughts rushed through Jake's mind as he stood and looked at the small smile that was on Brandee's face. He realized that there was no accounting for taste and beauty was in the eye of the beholder, but there was something sinister afoot here. Brandee was acting very much like a teenager with a crush on Janelle. The misgivings that Suzi had stated that afternoon came back to Jake. He was beginning to realize that he needed to do something, and do it fast, if he was going to salvage his marriage. Brandee had lost her mind. Janelle needed to go away.
Jake lay awake for much of the night. He was trying to formulate a plan for something that he could do for Brandee that would spark the love lights that he was used to seeing in her eyes. When he finally drifted off to sleep, he had the beginnings of a plan.
***
Brandee was up early the next morning, planning to leave with Janelle by 8:00 AM, even before the Nissan left.
“What are you planning to do that you’re leaving so early?” Jake asked. The show in Crescent City wasn't until 8:30 that night and Crescent City was only about two and a half hours north of Garberville.
“I thought I might show Janelle around Fortuna a little. It's our home, after all. We'll stop downtown for coffee. It will be good if I take it easy. I have a big show tonight.”
Jake walked over to Brandee and took her by the shoulders. “Do you want me to drive? We can put Janelle in the Nissan and then you wouldn't have to drive at all. You and I can stop in Fortuna then. Would you like that?”
Brandee smiled and kissed Jake on the cheek. “That's sweet of you, but I promised Janelle that I would show her around.”
With that, Brandee swept into the bathroom to take her shower. Jake sat back on the bed, feeling a little hurt. It wasn't that Brandee was saying or doing anything that would appear to anyone else like a knife to his heart. Nevertheless, Jake was feeling the pain of a thousand pin-pricks. He didn't say anything more about the subject to his wife.
Brandee knew, deep down, that Jake's feelings were hurt by her dismissal of his idea to take a couple of hours together in their hometown. She had more questions for Janelle, though. They were questions of the soul that had been inspired by their conversation the previous afternoon. The singer felt that they had been interrupted, just when she was learning so much, by their arrival in Ukiah.
For one thing, she wanted to know what Janelle had learned about the hereafter in her studies in the realm of mysticism. She asked the younger girl to elaborate more on that as they left the parking lot of The Sherwood Forest.
“I don't know what I believe about some things,” Janelle began. “I believe in what you call The Creator Spirit. That makes all kinds of sense.”
“What about the immortality of the soul? Do you believe in that?” Brandee pressed. She felt like the nuances of mysticism were teasing her, just out of her re
ach.
Janelle bit her lip for a second before answering. She wanted to make the answer as clear to Brandee as she possibly could. Janelle was finding this conversation to be exciting on so many fronts. It was making her look deep inside her own belief system, and that had never felt as essential as it did during this conversation. On the one hand, though Janelle was still relatively new to the practice of mysticism, her conversation with Brandee was showing Janelle just how much she had already learned. In looking back on their discussion a day earlier, Janelle's heart thrilled that she was able to recall so much of what she had read and impart it to someone she admired - Brandee.
“I believe that there is something after we die. Maybe we just become a part of the Great Energy that makes up Creation. Maybe we become a part of what makes up Mother Earth. Whatever it is, that's where we find the reason why we were pulled out of the cosmic dust in the first place. Our souls keep growing and growing and learning and learning until we become a part of the higher consciousness.”
Brandee nodded happily in agreement. “You said that you were trying to find a higher state when you meditate. Is that what you are trying to find out while you're alive here? Is that the meaning of life, to get to that higher plane?”
“That's it exactly, Brandee! There is so much that we can attain through meditation and the search for the Creator Spirit’s presence!”
Brandee's mind was racing. This was what she felt that her soul had been seeking since she was a little girl. Her parents had given religion short shrift in her life, so she had been a lost soul without spiritual direction. All that she had was her drive to be accepted and adored by a crowd of people. Janelle had opened up an endless pathway, and she simply had to know more.
“Will you show me how to meditate? I need this in my life.”
Janelle looked around the Sprinter. “We could meditate right here, but we can't while you're driving. It takes quiet and concentration to meditate properly. It especially takes concentration to level up.”
Brandee looked puzzled. “Level up? Like a video game?”
Janelle laughed. “You're adorable. No, not like a video game. It's like this. You're at the stage now called the awakening. It's the first step of your journey. After this stage comes purgation. That's kind of like giving yourself completely over to the Creator Spirit. You acknowledge your own imperfections and commit yourself to climbing higher.
Brandee nodded again. “I would like that. I've always felt like I had to be perfect. It will be a relief to be free of that. What's next?”
“Next is illumination. That's where I am now, or just beginning to be anyway. That's where the truths of the universe and what might be but isn't yet can be revealed to me. I'm starting to learn of what's beyond this earth. It's so exciting. I can't even tell you.”
“God, this all sounds too good to be true. I know what we can do. There is a very special place in the town where I live. I'm going to take you there and you can show me how to meditate.”
“I will,” Janelle said breathlessly. “I so will.”
***
Meanwhile, Jake was sharing his plan for getting close to Brandee again with the other members of the group.
“There is this great little jewelry store near Crescent City. It's called Araxa. They have some of the greatest nature-inspired stuff that I've ever seen. There is a necklace and earring set in there that Brandee has been admiring for over a year. It's expensive – really expensive – but I'm going to get it for her.”
Suzi whistled in appreciation. She had been in Araxa before. Their stuff was truly magnificent. If she and Bruce ever married, she wanted the artisan at Araxa to design their rings.
“That place is so cool.” She looked at Bruce. “You remember Araxa, honey. They have all of the great native jewelry and the native paintings on the walls.”
Bruce was duly impressed. “It's a good place to find a special gift; I'll give you that. You're going to pop her eyeballs if you get Brandee something there.”
“Is that the place that's right across the street from Trees of Mystery?” Diane asked.
“That's the one. Do you know it?” Jake asked.
Diane nodded. “I've been by it, but I've never stopped in to look. Are you looking to court Brandee all over again?”
“That's kind of the idea. They say a man should never stop dating his wife. Maybe Brandee and I have stopped dating a little. I need to try to get that back into our lives.”
Suzi reached over the headrest and put her hand on Jake's shoulder, squeezing it a little in her affection for the younger man.
“You're a great guy, Jake Evans! Your wife should be buying you something at Araxa.”
***
Brandee and Janelle came into Fortuna at the 12th Street exit off of Highway 101. The Sprinter rolled slowly through the small town as Brandee pointed out her favorite sights to Janelle, from the poorer section at the north end, where Jake had been raised, to the posh Lawndale area where they made their home now. Brandee told Janelle stories from when she was very young, of visits to her grandmother's house, and of afternoons at the park. Eventually, Brandee pulled the Sprinter to a stop at The Redwood Cafe, on the corner of 12th and Main.
“I need a cup of coffee,” she told Janelle. “Then I'm going to take you to the meditation spot.”
The two young women walked arm-in-arm into the restaurant, a coffee shop that would have looked right at home in the mid 1950's. Brandee ordered a cup of coffee and a Danish. Janelle had a piece of apple pie and a Pepsi. Janelle looked around the mostly deserted coffee shop.
“Aren't people going to come crowding around you?” she said to Brandee.
Brandee shook her head. “Not so much. You have to remember that I did most of my singing in Eureka and Arcata. Those are towns a half hour away. The time that I've lived here, I've been just trying to get someone to notice my singing. Someone from one of the big cities, I mean. I don't really have a root system here, not like Jake.”
Janelle finished her pie and waited, inwardly impatient for Brandee to finish her coffee. Janelle had never been asked by anyone to teach them to meditate, and she couldn't wait. Finally, Brandee paid for what they had eaten and headed for the door.
They got back into the Sprinter, and Brandee rolled out of the parking lot of The Redwood Cafe. They turned east on Main St, traveling for about a half mile. She signaled for a left turn at a sign that said “Rohner Park. The Friendly City of Fortuna Welcomes You.” Brandee slowed the black van to the park speed limit of 15 mph, and rolled down the access road. Just before the road ended in a large parking lot, Brandee took a sharp right and drove up a gravel road behind a deserted skating rink. She stopped the Sprinter in the shade of the tall trees and turned to Janelle.
“Teach me to meditate.”
Those were the words she had been waiting for. “Open the windows and close your eyes,” Janelle said quietly.
Brandee opened all of the windows of the van with the power window button on the driver's side door, letting the chilly morning breeze flow through the interior. She turned again to face her passenger.
Janelle took both of Brandee's hands in hers, raising them to her own lips and kissing them.
“That's the blessing that starts us off,” she said. “Now, take 13 deep and cleansing breaths.
Brandee closed her eyes. Janelle touched Brandee's face and said, “Keep your eyes open during this part.”
“Sorry,” Brandee said quietly.
“Don't be sorry. Be reaching for the power of the Creator Spirit. She loves you. You are Her own.”
Brandee breathed deeply. Each breath felt more cleansing to her than the one before. She felt herself growing lighter as she breathed. Janelle spoke to her as she breathed her 13th breath.
“Look inward. Find the place where you heart meets your soul.”
Brandee looked down, but kept her eyes open this time. She was conscious of the touch of Janelle's hand in hers. Beyond that, though, she was cons
cious of her own breathing, deep and steady. She was conscious of her heart's steady rhythm beneath her shirt. The breeze flowing over her skin now felt warm and inviting.
Janelle's voice seemed to come from a distance. “Release the toxins. Release the anger and frustration. Breathe them out.”
Brandee breathed deeply, inhaling through her nose and exhaling through parted lips. She could feel her heart rate slow down perceptibly.
Janelle spoke again. “Release the toxins. Release the hurt. Breathe them out.”
Brandee felt something come over her that she would later describe as enhanced relaxation. She was in a greater state of peace than she could ever remember herself being. She felt at peace, but not sleepy. She was incredibly alert.
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