by P. M. Briede
When Winters was finished getting my statement I got the obligatory “if you remember anything you call me, not Lt. Lochs.” He stated he would be in touch if he had any more questions and then asked if I had anywhere to stay for the night. Even though I was released, my home was still an active crime scene. Paige and I looked at each other bewildered. Where would we go? Typically we’d stay with the other but both our homes were currently flooded with members of the NOPD. I didn’t want to make the hour drive to my parents and have to explain to them what had happened. I still hadn’t told them Wesley and I had broken up.
Having settled on springing for a hotel room for us to share, I told Detective Winters. He asked me to call him and let him know where we ended up. Paige just glared at him. “Look, Winters, you know how to get in touch with me and that should be sufficient.”
Olivier was leaning against the wall when we opened the door to leave my office. He nodded to the detective and collected both Paige and me in his arms. As I took in my destroyed home, sorrow racked my body. Olivier lifted me into his arms and carried me out of the house. We quickly walked to Paige’s car. “You are both staying at my house,” he declared once we were inside. “Paige there’s room in my garage for your car. Do you think they’ll notice if you just drive around the corner?”
“I don’t think so since they’re so concentrated inside the house but I’m not going to risk it,” she responded. “My bigger concern is if anyone notices that your car isn’t here. What did you tell them brought you back to the house?”
Paige didn’t drive directly towards Olivier’s home but instead left the neighborhood and re-entered it from the opposite side. He was sitting in the backseat with me safely ensconced in his embrace. “I said she left her purse in my car and since I’d planned to leave town and drive home immediately,” Olivier answered her, “I turned around to return it tonight. She didn’t answer the front door but I heard the scuffle so I went around back coming in through that door instead. When I saw what was going on, I acted.”
“Okay, what really happened,” Paige pressed him. “Because the one guy is in critical condition I hear.”
Olivier shifted uncomfortably. “I heard the scuffle from my house, jumped the fence, and went inside. I know you heard her statement, but Paige you didn’t see it. What they were going to do to her was brutal. I threw the one guy off her in a blind rage and trust me I didn’t miss the sound of his bones snapping when he hit the floor. They asked me what kind of workout routines I subscribe to but I just attributed it to adrenaline from seeing a good friend in such a perilous situation. Sorry if there are holes in my story but I hadn’t anticipated her being viciously attacked tonight.”
When we were in Olivier’s driveway, Paige unlocked the car. Olivier jumped out and punched in the code to his garage. Once inside and parked, he threw the door open and lifted me out of the car. “I can walk, Olivier, but I need you for balance.” When he opened his mouth to say something, nothing came out. I wasn’t placed on my feet but instead felt his arms flex around me more tightly. This close to him I could see the tears brimming in his eyes. “I’m going to be alright, thanks to you.” He took a deep, steadying breath, closed his eyes, and kicked the car door shut before walking through the door to his house which Paige was holding open.
When I was on the couch, Olivier raced through his home to close all the window blinds. Paige had gone into the closet to fetch me a more suitable change of clothes. I stared at her with a perplexed expression when she came back empty handed. “There are things in there to wear, but given your injuries none of them are going to be comfortable to rest in.” I’d figured as much.
She took me in her arms and told me I was safe and to just let it all out. At the moment I no longer felt scared or sad, I was angry. I was tired of being everyone’s victim. Since coming home I’d suffered an attempted assault in a club, had an exile inadvertently try to burn me alive, been handed my broken heart, and now severely beaten as foreplay to rape and murder. As I examined myself, I saw their hands and fingers in bruise patterns around my arms and ligature marks around my ankles and wrists. Was there no end to the injustices I was going to suffer?
“Charlotte, please don’t be mad, but I called Wesley,” Paige confessed. Her hand was finger combing through my hair but I think it was just as much to lull her as it was to lull me.
Olivier’s voice exploded from behind us. “Why in the hell would you do that?! Hasn’t Breaux ignored her enough? Now you just hand him another way to hurt her? He’s already shown he doesn’t give a damn about her or her feelings!”
Olivier’s outburst started an argument I was in no mood to stomach but wasn’t fast enough to stop. “Shut up, Olivier!” Paige flung at him. “Stop acting like you know Wesley. You don’t! The last time she was hurt it took multiple members of security to keep him from storming into the operating room.”
“So I should revere him then?” Olivier verbally hit back. “That was back when he wanted to marry her and seemed to only have eyes for her. A lot has changed since then. Besides I’m now convinced that act resulted more from guilt then love. Had he not lied to her she wouldn’t have been burned in the first place!” Olivier was fighting the instinct to pummel Paige. The adrenalin from earlier was still pumping wildly through his body. I saw it in every pulse from the vein straining in his neck.
Paige stood and fixed Olivier with a glare. “I was wrong when I said Wesley played us all,” she spat. “Charlotte was right; it’s not in his nature. He’s shunning all his friends and is suddenly only listening to Banks and is enraptured with Abigail. It’s all too convenient for my tastes.”
Halfway through her initial attack, I’d said “don’t.” I’d followed-up with “stop” and “please,” each uttered with escalating volume. But they were both so focused on each other, I could tell this wasn’t the first time they’d had this disagreement. When Paige paused for breath and Olivier opened his mouth to retort, I jumped in shouting, “ENOUGH! Damn it, have I seriously not been through enough tonight? Do I really have to sit here and listen to you two scream at each other?” I stood and faced Olivier. “Where is my room?” He took a step towards me with contrition etched on his face. “NO! You stay there. Just tell me which room!”
With the directions, I turned towards his stairs. Paige’s hand found my lower back and I jerked from her touch. The sudden movement caused me to stumble and they were both at my side before I could fall. I yanked my arms away from them and took three of the steps before facing them. “Do not touch me. For some damn reason you all think I need to be protected and sheltered. Yet of the four of us, and yes I’m including Wesley, I have been dealt all the tragedies. My mother died, I found out I’m barren, my husband was murdered, I was set on fire, my lover abandoned me without a word, and those two bastards planned on raping then killing me! Every time I pick myself back up, leaning on you for support, which I appreciate. But don’t confuse that with thinking you’re the reason I get through all of this. I am not fragile and I don’t need decisions made for my wellbeing anymore. So the next time you want to call Wesley on my behalf or debate what you think is my side, you’d better make damn sure I’m okay with it!”
With that I marched up Olivier’s stairs, depending heavily on the railing. Once inside the room I slammed the door shut and locked it. It was childish but since everyone else seemed to have lost their adult minds, why couldn’t I? Not looking in the mirror, I turned on the shower, took off the scrubs, and threw them in the garbage. The water was warm when I stepped into it and immediately the streams running into the drain colored red and pink. That was the last straw; the final nail in the coffin of my hopes that this had all been an extremely realistic nightmare.
I collapsed onto the floor, sat back against the wall, pulled my legs to my chest, and wrapped my arms around them. My tears joined the rain of water that was falling to flow down the drain. For seven weeks, other than the pain of my broken heart and lost future, I’d been safe and s
ound. There’d been no stress and no fear, but also no joy or expectation.
Was it a coincidence that the night I was coerced into living again was the same night that life would once again be threatened? Or was this all part of some greater scheme? Did I have free will to make my own decisions or was I just a pawn on a chess board while greater beings fought over my future?
Overwhelmed by all that was swimming in my mind, I reached for the soap and attempted to clean my attackers off of me. Yet, no matter how many times I washed or how deeply and roughly I scrubbed, I could still feel Shorty’s tongue as he’d tasted my neck. I could still feel Squeaky’s tip press at the folds between my legs while Shorty rubbed his at my butt. Between their violation of my body and Wesley’s violation of my trust, was I ever going to know the comfort of a man again? Did I want to?
Chapter 10
When I awoke, I was in a strange bed in a dark room. Thirsty, I sat up and was reminded by every muscle and joint in my body where I was and why I was there. My hand fumbled around the bedside table until I found the switch to turn on the lamp. The clock told me it was three in the morning. I didn’t remember putting myself to bed. The last thing I remembered was sitting on the floor of the shower. I was also dressed in a man’s t-shirt and boxers. Their woodsy scent told me they belonged to Olivier.
I stood and carefully walked to the door. It was still locked, so he must have unlocked the door from the other side, gotten me out of the shower, dressed me, put me to bed, and then left after re-locking the door. I found it amusing that he thought maybe I wouldn’t put together those other details and think a fairy godmother magicked herself into the room to care for me.
The hallway was dark and the lamp from my room didn’t illuminate my way. With the kitchen as my destination I lifted my leg. There hadn’t been time to place it back down before a voice warned, “Careful, my dear, I’m right here and I wouldn’t want you to trip.”
Then maybe you should have stayed quiet! While I didn’t trip over Olivier, the shock of having him sit sentry outside my door tipped the scales of my teetering balance too far and I fell. His arms whizzed out of the darkness to change my momentum from falling backwards to falling forwards and I was caught in the safety of his lap. “Jesus, Olivier,” I chastised him, “if you wanted me dead you shouldn’t have come to rescue me last night.”
It was a poor joke, as all mine were when I was nervous and out of sorts. Olivier’s arms tightened around me. “That’s not something to joke about,” he seethed. “Turns out their plans were worse than you or I had even begun to image.”
The warmth of his body made me forget my thirst so I snuggled into his chest and rested my forehead in the crook of his neck. “What makes you think so?” I asked with a yawn.
“I’ve been listening to the investigation all night,” Olivier admitted, confirming my suspicions. “They’d better put those sick bastards into protective custody because I’m not sure who will get to them first, Paige or me.”
“We don’t need to worry about her;” I said hoping to put him at ease. “She’s got too much pride in her work to risk it on those creeps. Are you going to tell me what you learned?”
“No,” he said with conviction. “And I hope you never find out. Maybe this time they’ll be smart enough to plead out for life in prison versus going to trial and risking the death penalty. Paige is sure that’s the sentence the DA would seek given this is the second time they’ve attacked you. Plus, with all the evidence they’re getting out of your house she’s pretty sure there’s enough evidence to convincingly link them to some serials the department has been trying to solve for the last year or so.”
For some strange reason knowing that my ordeal would bring closure and peace to others was a small consolation prize. “Then I’m glad that something good can come out of this.”
One of the hands that had been crushing me to him found my jaw and gently adjusted my head until Olivier could look me in the eyes. “Stop with the jokes, my dear,” he reprimanded me. “This is no laughing matter. I’m as glad as anyone that those lowlifes are going to be off the streets for good this time but I would put them back out there in a heartbeat myself if it meant trading away the terror they inflicted on you.” His fingers outlined my black eye and the throbbing that was underneath the bruising ebbed some. “Let me heal you.”
His voice tenderly caressed me the same way his fingers were and I almost succumbed to his appeal. As much as I wanted to put these events behind me, the detective was sure to have a lot of questions if the proof of my assault simply vanished overnight. This time I needed to recover the old fashioned way. “Not this time, but thank you,” I said with all sincerity.
“I can wake Paige,” Olivier argued. “We can stand in the shower and she can turn it on when she needs to.” His nose trailed along my hairline as he breathed me in, sending tremors down my spine. But instead of finding this exciting, it made me nauseated. Jumping up, I ran back into my room and vomited into the toilet. All I could focus on was trying to rid my mind of the memory of how they’d touched me, how they’d toyed with me, and how they’d assaulted me.
Olivier followed and crouched down beside me. “Shhh, Charlotte. I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t hav…” I put a finger to his lips to silence him. This was absolutely not his fault. I just wasn’t ready to have him, or anyone for that matter, touch me like that. The sense memory was too fresh and raw.
When I felt confident my stomach was empty, I sank away from the toilet to lean against the wall. Olivier handed me a washcloth to wipe my mouth on while using another he’d dampened to blot the sweat off my brow. Once done, he handed me a toothbrush. In spite of myself I giggled before brushing my teeth.
“Can I help you back to the bed now?” Olivier offered as he knelt in front of me, putting his hands out, palms up.
I accepted his help and stood. He was so sweet, tucking me into bed as if I was a child. Once I was safely beneath the covers he asked if there was anything else I needed. My throat was still parched, but now that he was with me, I didn’t want him to leave. I vaguely remembered yelling at Paige and him that I was strong enough to get through this. Maybe I’d felt that way when I’d said it but I didn’t any longer.
“Will you stay with me?” I begged with my eyes locked on his as I clung to his wrist.
I watched, intrigued, as the fire swallowed Olivier’s pupils only to die just as quickly, becoming smoldering ash as he mastered his own desires. “Is that your wish, my dear?” he croaked. At my nod, Olivier walked over to close the door to the room and lock it. He didn’t remove any of his clothes when he returned to the bed but kicked off his shoes before lifting the covers to lie down beside me. “I imagine you don’t want me at your back,” he observed. Until he’d voiced his suspicion, I hadn’t thought about it. But he was right, the idea of turning my back on any man, not just him, made my stomach flip.
When Olivier stretched his arm out towards me, I rolled off my back and shifted until I was on my side with my head on his chest. He inhaled in surprise but didn’t fight me. His arm wrapped around my back and we laid there in silence for a bit. His breathing was steady but not the cadenced rhythm of someone who was sleeping. “Olivier, are you still awake?”
“Yes,” Olivier’s deep voice raggedly exhaled. The fingers at my back started tracing soothing circles on my shirt.
“From what you’re hearing, how long will they be in my house?” I asked. Once the NOPD released my home I knew I wasn’t going to be moving back in right away. There was damage that would need to be repaired, plus furniture and flooring that needed to be replaced.
“Sounds like they should have everything they need no later than tomorrow,” Olivier answered. “They’re waiting for sunlight to collect the evidence that’s outside. But you’d have to ask Paige if that means they immediately release your home. Don’t worry though, you have a home here as long as you like and I promise to be a gentleman.”
I moved one of my arms from his side
, where I’d held both of them to my chest, to place it on his with my palm over his heart. His hand came to rest on top of it. “Easy there, my dear,” Olivier cautioned. “I think we’ve reached the limit of the control my mind can exact on my heart. Truth be told, we’re past it but I want to give you whatever you need.” As he spoke, the beating of his heart sped up and grew heavier. I tried to take my hand back, but he strengthened his grip to keep it in place.
There had been a time, not long ago, when I’d thought no other man would be able to share the weight of my burdens after Giles’ death. Then Wesley came along and without even asking for permission he took the loads right off my shoulders. Now Olivier was doing the same and exacting identical results, the hole in my heart was growing smaller. My fears were no longer so daunting. The lonely abyss wasn’t as deep and foreboding. But it was hard to know what to do about it. Hadn’t I just wondered earlier if I could even handle being intimate with a man again? I’m deeply attracted to Olivier, I always have been, but even without an impending apocalypse, caring for him was dangerous.
It was nice waking in the arms of the man I’d fallen asleep with the night before. Wesley and Giles had both been early risers due to their jobs and most mornings I would wake alone. I had no idea when I’d fallen asleep. As my body shifted I stretched my legs and the arm draped across his chest. Smiling, I opened my eyes to look at Olivier’s face and screamed at the shock of seeing Squeaky’s instead.
“You’re alright, Charlotte,” Olivier tenderly whispered. “Open your eyes. It’s not them, just me. I’m right here. Shhh, my dear, it was just a dream.”
It was weird when I truly did open my eyes out of my nightmare. I didn’t move from darkness to light. Instead Squeaky’s image just became Olivier’s. It’s was like when you watch an old movie where the tape had been spliced together so the transition between images isn’t smooth. One second I was looking into Squeaky’s face, the next Olivier’s. Having just bolted up in the bed, I crumbled into Olivier’s embrace and cried.