by Sadie Moss
Was that about to end here?
The doctor grabbed a small tube, squeezing a liberal amount of something cool and wet onto my exposed stomach. Then he flipped on the machine, bringing the screen to life as he picked up the object attached to the end of the cord and glided it over my stomach, spreading the clear goop across my skin.
Images flashed on the screen, distorted shapes in shades of black and gray. He moved the thing around over my lower belly, watching the small screen carefully, until finally, his hand froze.
Triumph bloomed across his face like blood spreading from a wound, and nausea gripped me as I stared at his expression, not wanting to see the cause of it.
“There,” he breathed. “Look, kiddo. Your little miracle.”
Tears stung my eyes. Hope and despair warred in my chest as, against every command from my brain, my head turned toward the screen.
The ultrasound made everything unrecognizable, like a foreign landscape at night. But my eyes found it easily—the small black dot in the sea of shifting gray.
My baby.
An agonized whimper escaped my mouth, and I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the sight. A strange, unfamiliar kind of love expanded in my chest, powerful and instinctual.
That’s my baby. Not Strand’s. Doctor Shepherd can’t fucking have it.
I blinked away the tears clouding my vision, my brain whipping through possible options while I tried to relax my body into the table, giving myself millimeters more space to breathe.
Shifting was impossible. My body had refused to complete the transition, sensing that the chains would crush me to death if it did. I could try to push through and force it, but there was no point. And as long as I was strapped to the fucking table, I was helpless, completely at Doctor Shepherd’s mercy.
So I needed to get the chains off some other way.
My thoughts drifted back to Nils, to the manic devotion that had gleamed in his eyes as he talked about being chosen, about being granted an incredible gift. He had worshiped Doctor Shepherd and whatever gods he prayed to. He had truly believed in what Strand was doing. Like the perfect fucking lap dog.
And the doctor had considered him a friend.
Forcing down the panic clawing at my throat, I flicked my gaze from the monitor to Shepherd. “That’s my baby? It’s—” My voice broke, and I tried again. Starting with this tack was good, because at least my feelings about my child were genuine. “It’s beautiful. It’s so… amazing.”
“It is.”
Happiness and awe filled Doctor Shepherd’s voice, and I tamped down my rage at his reaction. This is good, Alexis. Use it to bond with him. Draw him in.
“I… I never knew I could love a little dot so much, but—I can’t even express it.” Biting my lip, I cast my gaze downward submissively. “Thank you, Doctor Shepherd. I didn’t realize it was because of you that I was able to receive this gift.”
He let out a surprised sound, and I could feel his gaze on me, assessing me, searching for the lie. Determined not to let him see it, I focused all my thoughts on the little piece of me and one of my mates, that tiny dot made of nothing but love.
“You were right,” I whispered. “It’s a miracle. I’m a miracle. Thank you.”
A slow, satisfied smile spread across the doctor’s thin lips. He reached over to press a button on the small screen, freezing the image, and set the wand back on the cart.
“Don’t thank me, Alexis. I’m just a vessel, a messenger of the gods. They’re the ones who gave us this power. I’m only their tool.”
“That’s… incredible. I can see why they chose you. And… Terrence Cole.”
Doctor Shepherd took a few steps back, running a careful hand through his hair. His eyes took on a faraway look as he answered.
“They chose me. I brought Terrence in because I thought he could be helpful; he had more money and resources than I did at the time. He didn’t realize the implications at first, the possibilities. And by the end, he didn’t think everything we’d done was worth it.” He scrubbed a hand over his chin, staring at the image of my ultrasound frozen on the screen. “If he’d just had more patience, I could’ve let him live to see this. He deserved to see this.”
Jesus. He had killed Cole. And like a true fucking sociopath, he seemed to be honestly mourning the death of a man whose life he had taken.
Trying to mask the fear in my eyes, I looked over, catching Doctor Shepherd’s gaze. “I’m sure he was proud of the work you did. I know Nils was. He knew. I couldn’t see it then, but I do now—what a gift this is. Without you, I was nothing special. But you made me more. You made me better.”
His thin brows came together, a line appearing between them. “Yes. I did.”
“I…” My tongue darted out to lick my cracked lips. “I think I want this. To have this baby. To be the mother of shifters. You’ll—you’ll make more like me, right?”
He dipped his head once. “Of course.”
Acid rushed up my throat, but I feigned a rush of emotion and choked out, “Good.”
“Yes.” His ash-brown hair caught the light as he cocked his head at me. “I must say, Alexis, I’m glad Nils had the chance to talk to you. I suppose I shouldn’t blame you too much for his death—it’s what your kind are made do to, after all. And maybe it took hearing the truth from another shifter to make you understand.”
I nodded, the back of my skull rubbing painfully against the hard metal surface beneath me. “Yes! I think so too.”
The doctor’s puffy blue eyes continued to watch me carefully, indecipherable thoughts filtering through them. Silence fell over the room, and my skin crawled with discomfort at the quiet. I tried to keep my gaze locked on his, but it danced nervously around the space, unable to stay rooted to one spot.
Finally, I cleared my throat. “Doctor Shepherd, I want to have this child. I want to protect it. I just don’t think… These chains are hurting me, and I don’t think it’s good for the baby.”
His eyebrows rose slightly, and he glanced from me to the monitor again. He traced the line of his tattoo with one finger, as if trying to draw on the wisdom of his gods for guidance. Then he took two steps forward, coming to stand next to the table again. He leaned over, one hand resting by my left shoulder as the other reached across my body, sliding over the chain that bound me to the table.
My heart rate jumped, and the metal restraints really did hurt like hell as my body stiffened with hope.
Please. Please…
Doctor Shepherd’s gaze met mine, and he leaned even closer. With his lips just a few inches from my ear, he spoke softly.
“I know what you’re doing. And I’m not going to untie you, Alexis. Do you think I’m fucking stupid?”
Something shattered in my chest. The last of my hope, maybe.
Of course he wasn’t going to let me free. He had designed me to be a killing machine, an animal who could deliver death in a single heartbeat. He knew better than anyone what I was capable of, and the man who had orchestrated the entire Shifter Initiative wouldn’t be stupid enough to let one of his experiments loose.
Not without being certain he could control her.
Rage and pain swarmed through my veins like angry bees as his hot breath caressed my ear. And unbidden, Noah’s words from what felt like a lifetime ago filtered through my mind.
It doesn’t matter if it’s sloppy. The point is to hurt them before they get a chance to hurt you.
Doctor Shepherd moved to stand, but before he could, my head snapped up, my mouth clamping around the shell of his ear as I bit down as hard as I could.
He may have taken away my wolf form, but my wolf was still with me. Inside me. She was me.
And I still have fucking teeth.
Cartilage and skin broke, and coppery blood flooded my mouth. Doctor Shepherd screamed, a sound so piercing and full of agony it made my hair stand on end.
He hurled himself away from me, tearing free of my clenched teeth with another ragged scream
. I spit out blood and a chunk of ear as he stumbled against the wall, one hand cupped over the side of his head as a stream of red cascaded down his neck.
“You—you fucking bitch!” he shrieked, his voice breathless and sharp.
Ah. There was the crazy. The cruelty and disgust he kept so well hidden behind the calm veneer rose to the surface now, called up by his pain and shock.
The monster he’d created wasn’t just theoretical anymore, a weapon to be unleashed on other people. She could fight back against him too. And he didn’t like that one fucking bit.
I wriggled desperately, trying to slide my sweat-soaked body out of the binds pressing down on me. I’d bought myself a few seconds, nothing more. And although I didn’t think I’d made Doctor Shepherd mad enough to kill me, he would hit back.
But the chains wouldn’t budge, and even as my bruised skin strained against them, I knew it was hopeless.
Doctor Shepherd kept one hand pinned to what was left of his ear, using the other to push away from the wall. His face was pale, the side of his neck slicked with blood, and his teeth were bared in a grimace.
“That… was not… fucking… smart, Alexis,” he panted, shaking his head as his nostrils flared.
He pulled open a drawer in the desk he’d been typing at earlier, grabbing out a syringe and popping the top off, baring the long, thin needle. He staggered toward me, his gaze focused on my arm. I gasped and grunted, struggling with everything in me as the sounds of my panic mingled with the noise of Doctor Shepherd’s harsh, pained breaths.
Then a new sound joined them.
A low rumble, like approaching thunder. It came from outside the room, and it grew louder as voices joined it.
Shouting. Yelling. Calling my name.
My mates.
Doctor Shepherd growled in anger, glancing toward the closed door before his gaze flicked to the gun he’d left on the desk. He hesitated for half a second, then flung the syringe away and threw himself toward his weapon.
But he was a half second too late.
Two shots fired, and the door crashed open. A large white wolf sprang through the doorway, knocking the tall man backward as he aimed the weapon. It flew from his grip, clattering across the floor as they both went down. The wolf—Jackson—snarled at him, but before he could bite, my other three mates were inside the room too.
Rhys strode across the floor, fearlessly coming between the wolf and its prey as he hauled Doctor Shepherd to his feet. Blood continued to pour freely from the man’s damaged ear, slicking his skin and painting Rhys’s hands red.
I had never seen my mate this angry. His body shook with it, his face a mask of pure fury as he drew his fist back and swung it, hard. Doctor Shepherd’s head whipped to the side, droplets of blood spraying from his mutilated ear as he grunted. Rhys hit him again, and again, and on the third strike, the doctor’s body went slack.
Holding him against the wall by a fistful of his shirt, my mate reared back to punch him again.
“Rhys, no!” I screamed.
I couldn’t let him kill the man like this. However much he might want to right now, he would regret it later.
And we needed Doctor Shepherd alive.
My words seemed to freeze the entire room. Rhys’s fist paused, drawn back over his shoulder. Noah and West stood poised by the door, and Jackson’s wolf blinked at me from where he stood near the desk.
Rhys uncurled his fingers from Doctor Shepherd’s shirt, and the man slid down the wall, slumping over onto his side. Noah darted forward, tugging a zip tie from his vest and using it to secure the doctor’s hands behind his back.
Then all four of them turned to me, relief and horror mingling on their faces as they absorbed the state I was in. I knew I must look awful. Blood coated my mouth, dripping down my chin, and my struggle against the chains had only darkened the bruises they’d left on my skin.
“Oh, Scrubs. Fuck,” West breathed, bending over the table and smoothing my hair back from my face with trembling hands. He turned to Rhys and Noah. “Help me get these damn chains off!”
The three of them ducked under the table, and the metal shuddered beneath me as loud clanging noises filled the space. Finally, the unbearable pressure on my chest lightened, and I sucked in a huge breath, certain I’d never get enough air again. The painful hold of the other restraints fell away too, and I shoved the heavy chains off me as they loosened. West and Noah helped me sit up, careful not to touch the purpling marks where the chains had been.
I opened my mouth to ask how they had found me when I caught sight of Jackson’s wolf. He was staring at me, his ears pressed back, head cocked to the side.
No. Not at me.
Behind me.
The bottom dropped out of my stomach, and I turned slowly, my gaze landing on the small, simple screen on the rolling cart. The machine was still on—still frozen on the image Doctor Shepherd had captured of my abdomen and the tiny little life growing inside it.
My other mates saw it too. I didn’t have to see them to know that, because I could feel the air change as soon as they did. As if a charge of electricity had filled the room.
When I finally turned back to Jackson, he had shifted to human form. He stood naked before me, his bare chest rising and falling as he blinked rapidly. Amber eyes met mine, so much raw emotion in them it made my throat burn.
“Alexis,” he whispered hoarsely. “What is that?”
Chapter Fourteen
He knew.
They all did.
Even without me saying anything to confirm it, they knew. Just like I’d known that day in the hotel bathroom with Val, before the five pregnancy tests. An instinct shared by our wolf and human sides, maybe—an ability to detect a seismic change in the course of our lives.
“I don’t…” Noah blinked, running a hand through his tousled blond hair, his gaze locked on the screen. His gray-blue eyes were glassy. “I didn’t think…”
His mouth dropped open, and words seemed to fail him.
West shook his head, backing up a step. “You’re… pregnant?”
I nodded, licking my lips and grimacing at the coppery taste. I wiped my hand over my mouth and chin, trying to clear away Doctor Shepherd’s blood. I didn’t want any part of that asshole touching me.
“How?”
West’s brows drew together as he spoke, a flash of pain glinting in his dark brown eyes. I was sure he was remembering his forced mate bond to Cat, and how Strand had taken her away and likely killed her after she hadn’t been able to get pregnant.
“Well… I mean, in the usual way, I think.” I shrugged, biting my lip as my attempt at a joke fell flat. “But if you’re asking how it happened to me when no other shifter has ever gotten pregnant before, I don’t exactly know. I think it has something to do with the dosage of serum I was given—with how I was made. It’s why I was in an elite facility.”
West nodded dazedly, his mocha skin a little ashen as he processed that.
For the first time, a twinge of worry made my stomach flip. I’d been waiting for the right moment to share this news with my mates, and this couldn’t have been further from what I’d envisioned. I had meant to break it to them gently, to share the hope and also the fear at this unexpected new development.
We all had truckloads of emotional baggage thanks to Strand, so I hadn’t expected the declaration to be met with laughter and happy tears the way it always seemed to be in movies.
But I also hadn’t expected it to be quite this… quiet.
Silence filled the room for another few breaths, and my heart sank lower with each one. I was about to slip off the table just to escape the weight of their stares when Noah made a strangled sound in his throat.
Before I could move, he was in front of me, wrapping his arms around me, clinging to me in an embrace so tight it made my bruised flesh ache. But I didn’t care. I hugged him back just as hard, feeling his heart galloping in his chest as he buried his face in my hair.
“You
’re gonna have a baby,” he whispered, his voice cracking. “A little you. A little Scrubs.”
I nodded against his shoulder, tears spilling down my cheeks. I didn’t even know if they were happy or sad tears, just that the emotions bottled up inside me had been too fucking much. They needed a release.
“Yeah. Yeah, I am.”
The words were hardly more than a breath, but as they fell from my lips, it felt like being unchained from the table all over again. I hadn’t realized until this moment the weight I’d been carrying, how much it had tortured me to keep the truth from my mates.
“Holy fuck,” Rhys muttered roughly, and a second later, his broad arms latched around the two of us.
Noah loosened his hold on me, allowing me to turn into his pack mate’s embrace. Long black curls tickled my face as Rhys kissed me, muttering unintelligible curses and prayers into my mouth. My head spun as I kissed him back with everything I had, swallowing his words like they were my own. I could feel his shock, his love, his protectiveness, and I tried to show him through my touch that I felt all those things too.
The rollercoaster of everything that’d happened in the last few hours finally began to catch up to me as I clung to my mates. I felt drunk, dazed, numb, and wired at the same time. As I broke away from Rhys, I was transferred to West’s arms, and he cradled me gently in his embrace, whispering a promise I hadn’t known I needed until he said it.
“It’s gonna be okay, Scrubs.”
I knew it wasn’t a vow he could keep, but it didn’t matter. He meant it, and that was enough. Strength steeled my spine, and I kissed his neck before pulling away. He set me down gently on the floor, wonder and disbelief still clear on his face.
The tile chilled my bare feet, and I glanced up, catching sight of Jackson where he still stood on the other side of the room. His posture was stiff, and there was something in his eyes I’d never seen before. Something I had put there.