Sinner: A Bad Boy MC Romance
Page 5
My fingers tingled, and I reached for him, unbuttoning his shirt. His chest was smooth and a mass of solid muscle, his abs rippling as I dragged my fingertips over them, down to the fly of his jeans. He shifted, and I glanced down, finding him pushing those heavy boots off with his toes. He was ready for me to make the next move.
I bit my lip as I drew down his jeans and the boxers beneath, and I inhaled sharply as his cock thrust forward, long and hard and thick, with its release. I cupped his erection in my hand, amazed at his size and the perfect form, and he shivered and tensed. “Mina…” My name was a tight utterance from deep in his throat, and he looked like something troubled him. I curled my fingers tighter around him and stroked, up and down, and he shuddered again, his head falling back and his eyes closing.
He grabbed my wrist and stilled my efforts, and I had a moment of regret, thinking I’d done something wrong. But then his eyes captured mine, and I could see worry in them. “I haven’t been with a woman in…a very long time.”
I froze. How could I not have thought of that? “How long?”
He shook his head. “You know the answer to that.” He leaned forward and bent his neck, kissing me softly, almost tenderly, before pulling away again. “You’re going to have to slow down if I’m going to be any good for you at all.”
So, he hadn’t been with a woman since before he’d gone to prison. But how long before that? And what had happened to him while he was incarcerated? “Okay,” I hedged. “Have you…been with anyone?” I didn’t know how else to ask, and I hated having to ask at all. But no matter what I intended to do here, and no matter how much I wanted Jasper, there were things that had to be addressed first.
I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until he shook his head, and I released in in a large puff of air. “Nothing like that. I’m clean. I got tested. I just…I want this to be good.”
I nodded, relieved and more anxious than ever. “Well, if I’m your first since…” I trailed off. I couldn’t say it out loud. Inhaling deeply, I smiled. “I guess I’ve got a pretty big job to do myself to make it worth waiting for.”
He grunted, reaching out and running the backs of his knuckles along the top of my breasts, right at the edge of the bra. I sighed, the sensation delightful. “Trust me, you’ll do just fine.” Then, he closed the gap between us with one step, shoving his hands in my hair and taking my mouth with such force I whimpered. But it tasted so good, felt heavenly, that I didn’t care if it hurt. I wanted more, and I wanted it now.
I put my hands on the back of his neck, drawing him in deeper, swallowing the kiss and trying to rid him of any hesitation he had. Something inside me changed, and I suddenly wanted this to be perfect for him. Not because I needed him in the palm of my hand so I could crush him, but because I needed him to want me, to feel some sort of connection with me. This was as big a leap for him as it was for me, and I was determined to appreciate that.
His fingers slid down my spine to the hooks of my bra, and he released them with a flick of his wrist. The bra slid between us, and I let it fall to the floor. He pulled my panties down my thighs, and I let those fall, too, stepping out of them as one of his hands found the heat between my legs. He pressed his thumb against my clit, running his fingers over my slit, and I gasped, an angry hot desire flooding me through and through. My veins burned, my blood like hot lava, and I knew he felt the moisture pool in his palm as he groaned into my mouth. The sensation was erotic.
He spun me around, my back against the door as it had been last time he’d kissed me, but this time, the surface was cold against my skin. And he was working me into a frenzy, one finger teasing at my opening. I couldn’t think straight with the multiple stimulations – tongue, fingers, frigid surface – and I clawed at him, not sure if I wanted to get away or beg for more.
Jasper interpreted my desperation better than I could and drove his finger inside, swirling and thrusting as he curled it right up against my G-spot. I nearly choked as pleasure swept through me, pressure building deep in my gut. He flicked his thumb against the ball of nerves on the outside as he worked, and I had no control as I erupted, crying out and hitting my head against the door. It didn’t stop him. Instead, it seemed to fuel him, and he inserted two fingers, pushing harder, faster, deeper.
The orgasm wouldn’t quit, either, and I thought I was going to black out before he finally gave me a moment to recover, stilling his fingers inside me. When he pulled them out slowly, it ignited every nerve ending inside me, and I moaned. I had never come that hard before, and I was almost disappointed it was over. But as he shoved those two fingers in his mouth and I watched him revel in the taste of me, I could feel the sensation and need gathering again, the muscles tight and ready for more.
God, this man was good.
Jasper bent, looped an arm around the back of one knee, and hiked it in the air, holding it up so I could wrap it around his waist. I didn’t protest. I wasn’t a virgin by any means, but I’d never had sex anywhere but in a bed. Just knowing we stood here, against the door where anyone walking by could hear us, made my adrenaline pump. The lights were on, and I was spread wide for him to see. That, too, gave me a sense of erotic power like I’d never experienced before.
I glanced down along our bodies, watching him find my center with the head of his cock, which throbbed with need, and as he slid into me, the visual sent me over the edge again. I came with wild gasps and cries, but I didn’t look away, watching as he thrust slowly, in and out, several times. He laughed, a deep, dark sound that was almost sinister and mocking, but I didn’t care. He knew what he was doing to me, and it turned the tables. At this point, I would have let him do anything he wanted. I would have signed over my wealth, my life, my free will, for him to keep doing it.
It felt too damn good.
He thrust with real power, and my foot came off the ground. I gasped and wrapped it with the other around his waist, and his arms came around me, his fingers gripping tightly and digging into my ass. My breasts were flattened against his broad chest, the nipples hard and puckered as he found a motion that had them stimulated, simply brushing against his skin.
My nails found purchase in his biceps, and clung to him for dear life as he pounded into me, my skin pulling against the surface of the door as the sheen of sweat I’d built tried to make me stick to it. Perspiration beaded at his brow, and I ran my hands up the sides of his neck, cupping his cheeks and bringing him in for a kiss that told him how much I wanted him to take me, take every bit of me. He responded, still slamming into me, mimicking the gesture with his tongue in my mouth. I opened wider, fisted my hands in his hair to pull him deeper, and adjusted my hips for a better angle. His length found its way home, his head pressing against the end of me, and I howled my bliss at the raw but incredible orgasm that followed.
It proved too much as my core convulsed around him, squeezing over and over. Jasper shook, grunted, and slammed so deep into me as he finished that I was sure I could taste his release. He shook, seizing with the effort, and his face contorted into a mask of pain and ecstasy as I rode the wave with him, and then, every line of tension in his body dissipated. He relaxed, sagging against me and closing his eyes as he pressed his face into the crook of my shoulder. I could feel his eyelashes fluttering against my skin, long and soft, and it tickled in just the right way. His breath came in shallow puffs over my neck, and I wanted nothing more than to stay in this position.
But I could feel his strength giving way, so I let him ease me to my feet, my legs wobbly and unsteady. He held me up until I felt like I was back on solid ground, and then he released me, taking me by the hand and leading me to the couch. I expected him to sit me down next to him or even take the wooden chair next to the softer surface. Instead, he sat and pulled me into his lap, cradling me against his chest with an arm around my back and one draped across my knees.
It was enthralling.
I lost track of time, barely able to keep my eyes open, but at some point, he shift
ed me enough to reach for a cigarette and light it. For some reason, the smell of the smoke didn’t bother me in that moment. But it did rouse me enough to know that I’d just started something much bigger than I’d anticipated, and if I wanted to keep it up, there was a question I had to ask. It probably wasn’t the best time, but I also knew there would never be a good time, so I just blurted it out.
“Why did you do it?” My throat was raw, my voice hoarse and almost childish, but he just tensed slightly, waiting for me to complete the question. “Why did you try to steal the paintings?”
He hesitated only a moment. “Does it matter?”
“I don’t know.” It was an honest answer. Depending on what he said, the damage might already be done, and I would go home with an ache, a part of my empty. I didn’t understand why, but for some reason, I felt like there was something deeper here than sex, a bond I hadn’t meant to form. But the answer might also give me some kind of closure. I had to know.
When he didn’t say anything, I tilted my face up and stared in shock at the pain in his eyes. Meeting my gaze, he sighed and told me, “I was trying to save my wife.”
Chapter 6
Jasper
I hadn’t expected the question, but that was an oversight on my part. I couldn’t pretend there wasn’t a very dirty, ugly history between us, and Mina hadn’t come searching for me to offer instant forgiveness. I had a penance to do, and I understood why she would ask. I felt like I owed her an explanation, and that thought told me just how wrong I’d been about my ability to use her.
I wasn’t going to be able to pull off the game, something inside me aching at the thought of ever hurting her again. She was soft and vulnerable, even if she was tough as nails and ready to battle. I didn’t care at the moment what her motives were. She’d enjoyed herself as much as I had, which was a relief and triumph for me, considering how out of practice I was. So, this was a crucial moment, and I just let out the secrets I’d clung to for a decade.
“Your wife?” Mina’s jaw dropped, and I knew it came as a shock. So few people knew about Cindy, aside from my brothers in the MC who’d stood with me through the tragedy, that I wasn’t surprised her lousy PI had been unable to produce that information.
“Yes, my late wife.” I cleared my throat, determined not to get overly emotional. The only way I would be able to talk through this was if I remained somewhat stoic and aloof, as if it was someone else’s story I was telling. “We hadn’t been married long. I met her when I came back from my tour of duty in Afghanistan.”
“You’re ex-military.” She gawked at me, sitting up straighter but not pulling out of my light embrace. That was a good sign.
I nodded, puffing on the cigarette. “I was Special Ops, so those records are sealed pretty tight. But I met Cindy when I got back, and it was kind of a whirlwind. We got married fast. But she ended up sick, and turns out it was a rare blood disorder. There weren’t any approved treatments, but there was some experimental stuff going on in Sweden. It cost a fortune, not just for the treatment, but to get there and stay there, and neither of us would have been able to work for probably a year or more. I would have to take care of her full time. We needed a way to pay for it, and I was never going to find a job that paid enough in time to buy our passage. When they said she might not last six months, I had to do something.”
I stopped, snubbed out the cigarette in the ashtray, and started stroking her leg absently with the tips of my fingers. I felt the goosebumps rise and basked in the nearness of a female, one who didn’t pull away from me and was raptly listening to what I had to say. “Anyway, I knew a lot about art, so I obviously knew who your father was. And it just struck me as an option. If I could get the paintings and either leverage them for a ransom that would be paid to an anonymous account offshore, or sell them at auction, we’d be set for as long as we needed.”
I kissed her forehead. “I never meant to hurt anyone, Mina, and if it makes you feel any better, my wife didn’t live to see my trial. She didn’t have to watch me waste away in prison, and luckily, I didn’t have to watch her die slowly while I could do nothing about it.” I shook my head and looked away, no longer able to make eye contact without losing my carefully sustained control. “She died, and it took the daughter we had with her.”
“She was pregnant.” Mina whispered it, and I could do nothing but nod and swallow back the lump in my throat. “Did you know?”
“Not till after she died.” Sam and Tyler had delivered the news, and I’d nearly fallen apart behind closed doors. My cell mate was the only one who knew just how hard it hit me, and he never said a word to anyone. He just gave me a little support here and there, pep talks when I needed them, laughter when I was too down to function.
“I’m so sorry, Jasper,” she said, and the sincerity in her tone nearly broke me as she wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled my head to her soft, full chest. I didn’t know what to think of that. I’d never felt this sort of comfort, even from Cindy. She’d tried, but she was in so much pain all the time she didn’t have the capacity to deal with my worry and my sadness.
I forced myself to recover quickly. I didn’t want this discussion ruining the pleasure of the night, and I didn’t even know how much longer I would have the relief of Mina’s company in this godforsaken apartment. I put my hand to her chin and lifted my head, taking her mouth with slow, enticing strokes of my tongue, wanting to show my appreciation for her tenderness. This woman, who had lost her father as little more than a child because I’d made a selfish decision, had no reason to comfort me, no reason to feel any sympathy toward me. And yet, I felt more whole in that moment, with her in my lap, than I had since the doctor had diagnosed my wife.
Mina pulled out of the kiss breathless, her eyes twinkling and warm and a smile playing over her lips. Her cheeks were red, and I could tell by the tension in her body she was aroused again. I had to admit, with her naked body up against mine like this, it wouldn’t take much to get me ready for another round. After all, it had been more than ten years. I didn’t count a 30-second hand job in the shower to relieve the pressure.
“Jasper…you’re not a career criminal, are you?”
I didn’t know what to say to that. I mean, the guys wanted to try another heist, and I didn’t want to be a part of it. But I owed them. And I’d already spent a large chunk of time preparing for the first heist and then paying for it. I didn’t want to be a career criminal, but I knew it might already be too late. “I don’t want that,” I told her. “I did my time. I don’t want to go back.”
Mina
“I wanted you to.” The words slipped out without my permission, and his eyes went wide. This time, I averted my gaze. He’d been so honest with me, bared his soul, that I knew I could never go through with my original idea. I had never been as desperate as he must have been when he made his choice, but I understood as much as possible. I had to forgive him, and I had to be honest myself. “I wanted to catch you, doing something else horrible, and I wanted to send you back for the rest of your life.”
Slowly, he nodded and reached for another cigarette. “You say that like you don’t want to do that anymore.”
I combed my fingers through my hair, catching them in knots, and I knew I must be a terrible sight. But that wasn’t my biggest issue. I was completely embarrassed. I’d misjudged him, thought he was coldhearted and careless. I’d been very wrong. This man had emotions that ran deep, and he buried them beneath a hard exterior. “No, I don’t.”
He didn’t talk, and I felt the need to fill the silence with an explanation. “Look, I’ve held onto my resentment for a long time. My father and I were so close, and then he got ripped away from me before I was grown. I was in high school, and that meant he was never going to see me graduate or get married or have his grandchildren. And I blamed it on you. But you didn’t mean for things to happen like they did, and you didn’t act out of malice or greed. I’m not sure what I thought about you, but I was way off base.”
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“What do you mean?”
I smiled ruefully, and I felt the heat rising in my throat and cheeks. “Well, I thought I would hate you. I thought you’d be this cocky son of a bitch who would rub me the wrong way so that I could hate you more. And I thought that getting close to you would help me, you know, watch for that mistake that would lock you away forever.” How much was I willing to admit right now? I didn’t want to sound like some clingy, needy woman who latched onto someone the moment we had sex.
He scoffed. “I can see how that might be the case. I figured you’d be a snotty, spoiled little girl who whined and complained about having the wrong shade of nail polish.”
I stared at him, indignant. “That’s awful.” But I guess that would be what he thought of me. “The truth is, I actually like you. And don’t get me wrong. You are most definitely a cocky son of a bitch. I knew that the moment you got in my car. But you’re not evil or abrasive.”
I glanced down at his bare chest, and he must have caught me because he started shaking with silent laughter. “Admit it. The only reason you like me is because I’m a god in the sack.”
I met his gaze and quirked a brow at him. “No, that’s a bonus.” I couldn’t believe I was having this conversation. It felt surreal. The man I’d hated for my entire adult life was holding me in his lap, both of us naked, and we were having a heart to heart. I’d just admitted to liking him, and I definitely wanted him, more than ever now that I’d had a taste.
“Well, I have a confession to make,” he said, stroking a finger along my cheekbone and down my jaw. The caress was invigorating, and I tried to remember a time that anyone had touched me in such an innocuous and yet enticing way. “I thought I was going to have to dig your motives out of you, and I’m glad I didn’t. Because in the process of trying to get under your skin, I think you got under mine.”