by Mari Carr
Jordan cleared her throat. “Um, okay. What are we meeting about?”
“You.”
Jordan sighed. Shit. So much for her poker face. She’d come back to work from the mall yesterday and offered a breezy hello to Stephanie while avoiding the storage closet, where Casey banged away on the AC. She’d barricaded herself in her office for the rest of the night, sneaking out just before closing time so she didn’t have to answer any questions about her date with Casey—if that’s what it was.
Clearly this is why she’d remained in fantasyland for so long. It was a helluva lot easier than getting mixed up in real-life turmoil. She wasn’t cut out for the dating scene.
Her friends came in, Jayne and Sophie claiming the only other chairs in the room while Stephanie leaned against some boxes.
“What’s that?” Jordan pointed to the pitcher and plastic cups in Sophie’s hands.
Sophie placed the four cups on her desk and began pouring. “What meeting is complete without screwdrivers? Besides, you look like you could use a drink.”
Amen to that. Jordan accepted her cocktail, nodding her thanks.
Her friends grabbed their cups as well and then waited.
Jordan crumbled under their curious stares. “If this is about the dating deal, it’s only been two days. You said you’d give me a month before forcing any blind dates on me.” Although Stephanie’s setups were looking pretty good—pretty safe—right about now.
“Doesn’t look to me like you need any more men in your life.”
Jordan looked at Stephanie, surprised. “What’s that mean?”
“Casey and Gabriel. Details. Now.”
Jordan sighed. These women were her friends and they were all far more experienced than she was. “I need advice.”
Sophie grinned. “Actually, I think you need to write a book. Two days after declaring yourself on the market, you manage to snag the interest of two of the most eligible bachelors in Portland. You are my goddess.”
Jordan laughed despite her anxiety. “I wish it were that simple.”
Sophie leaned forward. “Gabriel said he was bringing you as his date Friday.”
“He said I was his date?”
Sophie nodded. “Casey’s going, too. Is that going to be awkward?”
Jordan started to shake her head, but it quickly morphed to a shrug. “I don’t know. I’m so fucked-up right now.”
Stephanie crossed the room and perched on the end of her desk. “Why? You’ve been hot to get in Gabe’s pants for years. You’ll go to the party Friday night, get laid and live happily ever after.”
Jordan crinkled her nose. “Nice to know my future can be wrapped up so easily.”
“What’s wrong, Jordan?” Jayne asked.
“Casey. He’s terrific. Really awesome.”
Stephanie shook her head. “Wow. Talk about irony. You get Gabe on the day you decide you don’t want him.”
“It’s not that simple. I still want Gabriel.”
Jayne tucked her hair behind her ear and let out an amazed whistle. “You’re interested in both of them?”
“They’re so different. I like how easy Casey is to talk to. He’s silly and he makes me laugh. But then, Gabriel and I have so much in common. We read the same books, like the same music. We can talk about stuff that interests us for ages. He challenges my ideas and makes me think.”
Sophie adjusted her skirt and crossed her legs. “You’ve only known Casey for a couple of days, Jordan. You’ve know Gabe forever.”
“I know that. And there’s a nasty little part of me that feels like Gabriel had his chance. For years. Then the second another guy notices me, he finally makes his move.”
“No.” Jayne shook her head. “I don’t think it’s like that. You weren’t honest about your feelings for Gabriel. You never told him how you felt or even gave him any hints. I’ve watched you with him, Jordan. If I hadn’t already known you liked him, I wouldn’t have had a clue you were attracted to him. Instead you dismissed him out of hand and went on a date with his friend Casey. Your first date in two years, I might add. Gabe saw it and realized he didn’t like it. He approached you about Friday night, right?”
Jordan nodded. “Yeah. He did and you’re right. I’ve said the same thing to myself at least a dozen times today. It’s completely impractical for me to harbor this secret crush and then get mad at the man for not noticing. I keep using that as my excuse for picking Casey. Then I realize I haven’t known Casey very long and I’m back to picking Gabriel.”
Sophie dismissed Jordan’s concerns with the wave of a hand. “You’re two days in. Who says you have to pick right away? Date them both. That’s what I’d do.”
“I’ve thought of that too, but it doesn’t feel right to me. Casey and Gabriel are best friends. I’d never want to mess that up or turn it into some sort of competition.”
“Yeah, but trying to make a decision now is too hasty and uninformed. I think they owe it to you to at least give you a few dates each.” Sophie, for all her debutante ways, was always surprisingly practical. She gave the appearance of being a spoiled princess to anyone who didn’t know her, but Jordan knew better. Her gorgeous friend had a heart as big as Texas and a soul that matched her beautiful exterior.
“So I shouldn’t be worrying about this?”
Sophie sipped her drink. “Not at all. It could be a completely moot point by next week. Go out with them a couple of times, see what clicks. I have a feeling the answer will be obvious—one way or the other—after a few more dates.”
Jordan rubbed her tired eyes. She’d been a fool to hide. If she’d sought her friends’ help yesterday, she wouldn’t have tossed and turned all night. “Okay. That sounds reasonable.”
Stephanie stood and paced the room. Jordan was used to her friend’s boundless energy. Stephanie never sat for long. “What Soph says makes sense, but when you’re with them, you might want to remember something.”
“What’s that?” Jordan asked.
“You know they’re both good guys, but it wouldn’t hurt to check out their abilities in bed as well.”
Jordan groaned. “Ugh. Really, Steph? You think I’m going to sleep with them? Both of them?”
“Why wouldn’t you? Personally, I think sex is a pretty important factor when picking a perspective boyfriend. Take Jared, for instance—”
Jayne put her hands over her ears. “God. No more details about your sex life. I already have a hard time looking at Jared without picturing him doing one of the umpteen million sex positions you’ve described to us.”
Stephanie seemed unfazed by Jayne’s reaction. “So sue me for wanting to spark some creativity in you. I keep hoping my stories will prompt you all to get off your asses and get laid. Hell, Jordan, if you really want to shake things up, fuck both of them at the same time. How freaking hot would that be?”
Jordan tried not to succumb to the image, but it was too late. Stephanie had triggered the memory of her fantasy. Heat crept into her face and she tried to cover her blush by taking a long swig of her drink. “I appreciate your advice, Steph. I really do. And I think you’re right.”
“You do?” Stephanie and Jayne asked in unison.
“Not about the threesome,” she said loudly. “Dear God! Can you imagine me trying something like that? I just think it’s time I stopped making sex all about love and marriage and forever, and started thinking of it as something casual and fun. Besides, I’m so horny I’ve worn the batteries out on my vibrator twice in the past few months. Something’s gotta change, since it’s clear marriage isn’t in my immediate future.”
“I don’t know about that. I think sex and love should go hand in hand.” Jayne would always be their hopeless romantic.
Stephanie rolled her eyes. “Lay off the romance novels, Jayne. It’s not healthy.”
“Please. Let’s not go there again.” Jordan warded off the coming debate. She’d heard it one too many times. She let herself believe her friends were right, that things
weren’t as dire as she thought, but there was one more niggling idea rumbling around in the back of her mind. One she couldn’t say aloud, but it was the thing that bothered her the most.
She wasn’t sure either man wanted her at all. They’d both spent a large part of yesterday telling her how great the other guy was. What if neither of them was interested and they were each trying to find a way to pawn her off on the other? She swallowed heavily and put the thought from her mind. Everything would be clearer after Friday. She’d just have to hang on until then.
She stood and walked around her desk. “Thanks for listening to me.”
Sophie stood and hugged her. “That’s what friends are for. And for what it’s worth, I think either one of those guys would be lucky to have you. Now it’s time to start worrying about the really important stuff.”
Jordan frowned. “Like what?”
“Like what you’re wearing to the party on Friday.”
Chapter Six
Casey picked up a rag to wipe off his hands and walked to the front door to see who was knocking. It was nearly midnight—his witching hour. He��d been working on his new sculpture for nearly twelve hours straight, letting the clay take shape and form while relieving his stress.
He opened the door. “Gabe. What are you doing here?”
“You got a minute?”
Casey stepped aside and pointed toward the living room, gesturing for his friend to enter. “It’s kind of late, isn’t it?”
Gabriel took in the destroyed state of Casey’s living room and shrugged. “I know you. Figured you’d be up working.”
There were drop cloths over most of the furniture and a fine film of white dust covered the TV screen. In a fit of playfulness, Casey had drawn two stick figures in an obscene position. Cartoon porn. Gabriel chuckled when he saw it.
“I got bored,” Casey said nonchalantly.
Gabriel had given him shit for years about the impracticality of using his living room as a studio, but whenever the artistic urge struck, Casey followed, not caring where he was.
He walked over and pulled the cloth off the couch. “Want a beer?”
Gabriel nodded as he sat down. “Yeah. That sounds good.”
Casey grabbed two Coronas from the kitchen and then plopped down next to Gabriel. He handed him the beer, tapped the necks together in an unspoken cheers and took a swig.
Finally, he turned to Gabriel. “Let’s have it.”
Gabriel gave him a rueful grin. “You’re gonna make me say it? I feel like it’s pretty obvious we’re both gunning for the same girl.”
Casey had spent most of the day trying to lose himself in his art in an attempt to forget that fact. “Yeah. I guess we are. Listen. Don’t worry about it. I’ll back off, man.”
Gabriel frowned. “Why?”
“Because I knew when I met Jordan she was special to you.”
“So I had first dibs? Not sure it works that way, mate.”
Casey leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “You want me to spell it out for you? I’m not fucking Bruce. I’m not going to steal your girl.”
“Jesus. I’ve been a pretty shitty friend lately, haven’t I?”
Casey shook his head. “No. I think I’ve been the asshole. I knew you were hurting after Paula, but I didn’t say anything. Just sort of let you go into this self-destruct mode.”
Gabriel took another swig of beer. “Self-destruct, huh? Damn. Apparently I’m more screwed up than I realized.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I do. And you did everything right, Casey. You didn’t nag me like my mom, giving me shit about my dating habits. You didn’t take my dad’s route and offer endless platitudes about getting back on the horse and there are a lot of fish in the sea. You didn’t write me off as a friend like a few other guys. You just let me work through it.”
“Two years is a damn long time to work through getting dumped. Took everything in me not to tell you to grow the fuck up and get over it.”
Gabriel chuckled. “I stopped sulking over Paula about a year ago.”
“So what’s this last year been about?”
“Fuck if I know. At some point I turned into this new Gabe and I couldn’t figure out how to turn him off again. Didn’t have a reason to.”
Casey picked at the etching on his Corona bottle. “And now you do?”
Gabriel didn’t respond. Instead he put his beer on the coffee table and stood. He walked over to the sculpture Casey had been working on with a frenzy that bordered on manic. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been gripped so tightly by his muse.
Gabriel studied the form and Casey prayed it was too rough to be recognizable. He’d been an idiot not to cover the thing before opening the door.
“It’s not finished,” Casey said lamely. “In fact, it’s nowhere close to looking like it will when—”
“Three lovers?”
Fuck.
Casey laughed uneasily. “Crap. Is that what it looks like? I must be losing my touch.”
Gabriel didn’t look away from the sculpture. In fact, he committed a major faux pas in Casey’s book—a mistake he’d never made in the past. He reached up and touched the damp clay. “Jordan’s hair is a bit shorter now with her new hairdo. That part needs work. And while I appreciate the compliment, I’m not sure my arms are quite that muscular.”
“Gabe.” Casey’s words failed him.
Gabriel turned to face him. “Is this your answer? We share her?”
Casey shook his head, uncertain what he’d been thinking when he started the damn piece, and then he shrugged. When he began, he’d just started cutting figures without any plan of who he was creating.
Jordan had been first to emerge from the clay, which is why she was so recognizable. Then Casey began to create the man—his features fluctuating between Gabriel’s and his own. In the back of his mind, Casey thought the piece would make an awesome wedding gift.
When the man looked like Gabriel, it was a gift from the best man to his friend. When the man looked like Casey, it became a gift for his bride.
Finally, he gave up on the man in front of the woman and began adding the man behind. Once his internal battle ended, the art flowed faster, easier.
“I’m not sure that’s an option. Seems a bit out there, wouldn’t you say?”
Gabriel glanced at the sculpture again. “I would have said so…but this doesn’t look so out there. In fact, it’s really beautiful.”
Casey wasn’t sure if Gabriel was referring to the idea or the sculpture.
“Have you ever…” Gabriel pointed to the sculpture.
“God no. Jesus, don’t you think you would know if I had?”
Gabriel chuckled. “Yeah, I guess that is something you’d brag to your best friend about. It’s not like we have many secrets from each other. I recall one night back in college, sleeping on the top bunk and listening to you with your girlfriend in the bottom bed for hours.”
Casey closed his eyes, shaking his head in halfhearted regret. “Yeah, well, I was a lot younger, a lot stupider and three sheets to the wind. That’s also a lot different then what we’re talking about now.”
Gabriel nodded. “You’re right. This is different. Have you ever fantasized about a threesome?”
Casey shoved his hands in the back pockets of his jeans. “Sure. But it’s always been me and two hot chicks.”
Gabriel made a pained face. “Christ. It’s a nice fantasy, but can you imagine the reality of trying to get two women off?”
Casey rolled his eyes. “In my dream, the women are helping each other along too. It’s not just me doing all the work.”
Gabriel looked at the sculpture once more. “That’s not exactly the dynamic you’ve set up here, though.”
“No. It’s not.”
Finally, Gabriel faced him once more. “I know you’re not Bruce. And Jordan is light-years away from Paula. I’ve been acting like a selfish, spoiled asshole these past couple o
f years.”
“You were hurt. You—”
Gabriel lifted his hand. “My life’s been one long predestined event. Every decision I’ve ever made was because I thought it was what was expected of me—my major in college, moving home, taking over the business, Paula. I convinced myself I was in love with her because that’s what I was supposed to feel.”
Casey stood. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I think you did love her.”
Gabriel nodded. “I loved her. I wasn’t in love with her. And when the master plan failed, I struck out. Decided to buck the system by dating women my parents couldn’t stand, refusing to settle down. All of that was easier than facing the fact that for once in my life I was going to have to make my own decision. Risk making a mistake. Face being genuinely hurt. Paula didn’t break my heart, but she did shatter my oversized ego.”
Casey chuckled. “Pride I can understand.”
“You’ve stuck by me through everything, Case. You’ve never let me down, never failed to be there for me. And I know you’ve been trying to provoke me to jealousy, thinking it would get me off my ass in regards to Jordan.”
“Did it work?”
“Sort of.”
Casey frowned. “What’s that mean?”
“When I walked by and saw you and Jordan holding hands at the mall, I wanted to punch the fucking shit out of you.”
“So you were jealous?”
Gabriel blew out a long breath. “I also wanted to stand there and watch you kiss her. You two looked pretty hot together.”
“Jesus,” Casey muttered.
“I know, right? Yesterday sort of kicked me in the gut all the way around.”
“How so?”
“After you left, I was sitting with Jordan and something occurred to me.”
“What?” Casey asked.
“I thought Paula had beaten the ability to feel love out of me. She didn’t.”
It was a breakthrough. Casey wondered if it would screw things up if he shouted, “High five!” Instead he asked, “How do you know?”
“Because I’m definitely falling in love with Jordan.”