by Gabi Moore
“Hold up, OK slow right down here… see those houses on the hill? She’ll be in the fourth from the left,” he said and pointed to a dilapidated line of row houses, all abandoned and overgrown with grass.
My heart sank.
I hated that she had to do this. Come out here in the middle of nowhere. My mind flashed to her window box of daffodils. Was she afraid? I leaned over the dash to peer up the hill as I drove slowly into a clearing and tried to make out any signs of life.
“Looks dead to me,” I said. He nodded.
“Park here.”
The car tires crunched over the gravel, shot through with grass and weeds, and I listened to the silence after I shut the engine off. The fourth house from the left was partially boarded up, and painted in a chalky green paint with crumbling bannisters. The wind was so still the trees just hung there like that, like faded paintings.
I tucked my weapon into my holster and took a cautious step out of the vehicle. No fresh tracks on the ground, from either car tires or feet. No sign that anyone was here at all. Mike and I stood staring at the building, then we walked up, flanking the sides of the staircase to the main entrance, our eyes scanning the other houses. No open windows. Hell, one of them didn’t even have front steps anymore.
Mike gestured for me to go ahead while he trailed behind me. It was like old times, when we still worked together. With cat-quiet feet I took the stairs one at a time and peered inside. The glass of the front door was completely shattered through, but it was so dim inside I could scarcely make anything out. My eyes adjusted. An empty, dusty front room leading into a kitchen. I cracked the door and stepped inside, Mike guarding me close behind.
We both pricked our ears as the tiniest creak came out from the other room. Then I saw her. Like an eerie, slow-motion ghost, she walked out from the other room, and stood square in front of us both, both arms at her side, a gun in one hand and only a torn silky bathrobe knotted over her full breasts. I had never seen any woman with that facial expression before. Her hair was hanging loose and wild, and she stood tall and fierce looking, like she might spontaneously combust at any second. Her pupils were so big the color of her eyes disappeared completely.
“Evie? Oh god, Evie, are you OK? We have to get out of here,” I said, but her stare shut me up instantly.
It was like she was boring right into my soul. Like we were back in the container again. A deep shudder went through me. Out the periphery of my vision I strained to make out the plump bulge of her breast, the shape of her legs under that flimsy robe. I would have given anything to fuck her at that moment, right there and then, on those dusty floorboards with that untamed look on her face.
“Upped the bounty on my head, I see,” she said quietly, but her whole voice seemed to fill the room.
“It’s not like that, Evie. They’ll be coming after you. Joey wants you dead. You’re not safe here, you have to come with me.”
“And am I safe with you?” she snapped.
I took a step closer. I just wanted to put my arms around her. To hold her again. But even in the dim light I could sense her finger tightening around the trigger.
“Evie, there’s no time, please, I can protect you.”
She stared stony faced at me. I took another step towards her and she drew her weapon higher, filling the distance between us.
“Drop it!”
I spun around to see Mike charging through the door towards Evie. She took aim at him but he grabbed her wrist, twisted it violently to the side and sent her skidding towards him. He clutched her tightly and jabbed the barrel of the gun into her ribs. She screamed as he yanked her hair back to pin her closer to him.
“Sorry, buddy, I hate doing this man…” he said.
Fuck. No. This couldn’t be happening.
Before I could understand what was unfolding before my eyes I heard car doors slam outside and ran to see three men leaping out of a car parked beside ours.
“You fucking asshole! You set us up!” I hissed. He had Evie pinned in front of him as hostage, and I couldn’t have made a clear shot if I wanted to. I heard footsteps clattering up the front steps and took aim at the three who came tearing into the room.
“Step back! Step the fuck back!” I yelled.
The three tried to take a hasty appraisal of what they were seeing. In a heartbeat I turned to see Evie and Mike scuffle, and like magic she had twisted back and down to the side, pulling out of his clutches and elbowing him back up into the nose. He cried out but held her firm, and she delivered another blow. Everyone broke out into confused screaming. But Evie had already wormed her way free and had gained control of his weapon, still in his hands. When he finally squeezed the trigger, it went ringing out.
“No!” I screamed, but she leapt back and let his body fall down in front of her. A gush of red spurt out from a hole underneath his chin. She looked unruffled, watching him as he crumpled sinuously onto the floor. She crouched, picked the gun up and stood again, cocking it in the direction of the three stunned intruders. I would never stop being in awe of this woman.
“You lied to me,” she said coldly, pinning me with her eyes.
“No, Evie, I wanted to save you. He knew where you were. He betrayed me.”
“Why should I trust you?”
Before I could answer she took two aggressive steps towards the trio, aiming cleanly at the guy in the middle’s head. I saw him waver a little, saw that brief flicker of fear in his eyes, Rookie mistake.
She lifted her heel and leapt towards him, kicking hard down onto his shin and bringing him folding forward in pain. In a second she had snagged his arm and wrenched his weapon from him, sending it clattering to the floorboards and away from us. In the next instant two guns were cocked and aimed at her head, freezing her to the spot, her arm now around him.
“Don’t move, bitch, that’s enough.”
She didn’t move. In fact, it blew my mind how calm she seemed. Her eyes were wide and black and unfocused, yet she had moved as swiftly as a ninja. It was hard to believe that she was pregnant.
We stood there staring at one another, in a standoff that I knew I’d have to bust us out of.
“Drop your weapons,” I said in as calm a voice as I could muster. I was banking on them having orders to capture her but not kill her. Little Joey Valenti was an asshole, but even he wouldn’t murder a pregnant woman. Would he?
They stood their ground. I could make out her breathing. Her chest seemed so narrow and delicate, so small compared to those of the two that flanked her. I didn’t come all this way to have them do this to her.
“I said drop your weapons.”
The floorboards creaked under them as they dug their heels and stood their ground.
“We’ll take you too, buddy,” one of them said.
And then something strange happened. At first I thought I was hearing things. But then it was undeniable. I could hear her. Though her lips were squeezed tight I could hear her voice …in my head. I stared hard into her eyes. Nothing but deep, strange black. She wanted me to shoot the guy to her left. I just knew, like I knew my own name, that that was what she wanted, and in a moment, it was what I wanted too.
But it was stupid. His finger was hugging the trigger. Shooting him would guarantee a bullet in her head. There just wasn’t another way.
“Do you trust me, Jack?” she said out loud. I was taken aback. She flashed those stretched wide pupils at me and my heart broke and all I could say was that, yes, I think I did.
The next few moments unfolded in slow motion, like a grisly, bloodied ballet where she was the prima ballerina, and I was there to help her execute a daring, dazzling display of grace and athleticism. I lifted my gun and fired. Before the bullet left the chamber she lowered and twisted her weight down and away from me, bringing her hostage’s body square into the line of fire. A burst of red spew out from her human shield as the bullet tore into his soft flanks. Before a second had passed I delivered another bullet clean into the guy on the
right of her, toppling him. It felt like there were hours between each of those gunshots, and yet in reality they popped off almost at once, killing the three instantly.
The sound echoed and ricocheted off the worn walls of that place, disturbing a flock of crows outside. Her eyes flitted back into her skull, and all at once, she collapsed down to her knees and then fainted. I rushed over, pulled the dead man’s limbs from her small body and held her in my arms like a ragdoll.
“Evie! Evie, wake up! Are you hurt?” I cried out, my shaking failing to rouse her.
She hung heavy and limp in my hands. I put a palm to her clammy brow. She was burning up. Had she…? I couldn’t even think about that now. At least she was alive. I scanned the room and tried to think. There’d be others. I didn’t know what Mike’s angle was and I had no idea who else he had involved, but I didn’t want to stick around and find out.
I put one knee to the ground, slipped my arms underneath her and hoisted her up and then over my shoulder. She was light but a deadweight; completely unconscious.
I went over to kick the bodies on the floor and, satisfied they weren’t coming back to life any time soon, I turned to leave. I took one more glance at Mike. I had never been a bad judge of character before. I would have trusted that man with my life. And yet there he lay, his blood seeping into the dusty wooden floorboards below, and I wondered just what was so special about all these secrets Evie knew.
I angled her out the door and stepped into the harsh sunlight. I trotted over the gravel to the car, Evie’s hair bouncing in waves over my shoulder, and realized with fresh horror that they had slashed the car tires. With her still on my shoulders I opened the door, crouched down inside to pull out a few things, and then slammed it shut again. I didn’t have any idea what I was doing. I just knew that as long as she was alive, and as long as she had that little one inside her, I would keep running.
Though my thigh muscles were crying out in pain and I was suddenly aware of some raw, torn patches on the skin on my forearms, I gathered all my energy and stood tall again. I eyed a clearing in the brush, leading away from the house and away from the gravel road. I lowered my head, took a deep, painful breath and ran towards it.
Her body felt warm and toned and delicious as it weighed down on me. I was exhausted as I fled through that leafy tunnel, but it was all for her, all worth it …all easy so long as I knew she was alive, as long as I could feel her warmth, and the faint rise and fall of her breath in her chest against me.
Chapter 15 - Evelyn
I was strapped to the immense back of a giant, riding through the desert, heaving and swaying with each step it took. I could feel the giant moan and sigh underneath me as it carefully picked its way over the dunes, like the air in his lungs was the howling wind. I was safe. Mostly. Reflexively, I reached behind me to touch my own back. I was relieved to find that it was still there: the tiny swaddled bundle that I knew I had to carry and protect no matter what was still strapped to me. We were a stack of beings, each smaller than the one underneath, each more tenuous. He was awake, I was half awake, and the tiny bundle on my back was completely asleep.
Something cracked loudly and shook me from my dream.
It was Jack.
Jack was carrying me somewhere.
Though my eyes hung down heavy as lead and I couldn’t lift them, I realized that my arms were draped around his neck and the rest of me was hanging long and loose down the length of his back. I could feel my feet occasionally tap into things as he walked. Then he stopped. He could tell I had awoken.
“Evie?”
I said nothing, but he knew I was awake. I don’t how I knew he knew, but I did. He carried on walking, a quick, springy pace through what smelt like the woods. Slowly, the events of the day were coming back to me. A pile of bodies in a broken-down house. The feeling that I was only watching a video of myself from way up in space, a video where I could speed up and slow down time at will. Fuck, I had the hugest headache.
“Are you OK?” he said. He meant the baby. I had never planned to embark on massive shootouts and chase scenes in my first trimester, but it was what it was. I knew the baby was fine. I don’t know how I knew it, I just knew it. I said nothing. He kept on walking briskly. I don’t know how much time passed, but the air around us seemed to change, almost getting thicker and damper somehow. Either we had covered some good distance and arrived somewhere in a tropical rainforest …or it was about to pour with rain.
I felt myself being gently lowered and propped against a tree. My body felt weak but the fresh air revived me mentally. I was safe. Mostly.
“They nearly killed you,” he said, looking down at me with concern. I could see that he was hurt bad. A dry, crusted black blood stain snaked down his tattooed bicep.
“Before we go on, you have to be honest with me. What do you know? Why is everyone so keen to have your head?”
Wincing, I got to my feet.
“Where are you taking me?” I said.
He didn’t answer.
“You’re just like them… you just take and take and take …I left that life behind,” I said bitterly.
It was so easy to trust him in my dreams. In those quiet moments alone where I was sure that he was the only person in the world who had my back. But looking at him now, I had the crushing fear that he was just like all the rest, just looking to take what he could get. I was tired of mafia men. Tired of the death and the lies and the greed…
“Evie, tell me what you know.”
He was even better looking than I remembered. The veins in his neck pulled tight as he frowned at me, one legged propped up on a tree root.
“No.”
“Evie, tell me, for fuck’s sake. Haven’t you lied to me enough already?”
He took a step towards me, but I pulled back.
“I’ll kill you,” I hissed, and brandished a weapon I had pulled from his belt when I slinked off his back. He looked stunned. He backed away, hands raised.
“Evie you’re not well, you fainted back there, let me help you…”
I lifted my arms and took aim right between his eyes. I had a clear shot. It wasn’t that long ago that I had cruelly framed this man, and now I was carrying his child and I couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t make sense of the emotions swirling through me. Couldn’t get my heartbeat to stop jumping all over the place. But this is what I knew. Killing him would be easy. I would never have my happily ever after, not with my history, not with the enemies I had …so why was my hand shaking now, as it aimed at him?
He took a step towards me.
“Evie, put the gun down and let’s talk. Why do you think I’m out here now, in the middle of nowhere with you? If we have any hope of getting out of this mess alive we need to work together. And we need to be honest with each other.”
His words sounded so sweet. So tempting. Of course I had imagined it. Life with Jack. I had no idea what women with babies and husbands actually did with their lives, but I still couldn’t help imagine it.
Standing in front of me was a man who was offering to help me, no strings attached. Back in the house, something had happened. There was no denying it. We had worked together. Somehow. In my wildest fantasies I pretended we could read each other’s minds, that we were one of the rare ones who responded to Pink Kisses with a surge in empathy neurochemicals, and fucking secretly in a container glued us together and cemented our fates. But standing now looking at him, I felt silly for ever thinking that. Stuff like that didn’t happen. I had just taken too much of a poorly understood chemical and was paying the price. Old Evie would have wasted this guy hours ago. I lifted the gun and cocked the trigger.
We locked eyes. He took another step towards me, bringing his chest close enough that it touched the barrel of my gun. He stood there, pressing gently into it, his eyes still firmly glued to mine.
“Do it then, if you really want to,” he whispered.
This isn’t what I did. I was a killer. A tough-as-nails mafia quee
n bee who fought blood and guts for every last scrap of respect she had in the organization. Pulling the trigger was the easiest thing in the world for me. But I couldn’t do it.
“Kill me, Evie, if that’s what you want. Pull that trigger if you know you feel nothing for me, if what happened that night was just meaningless. Go ahead. If you’re really not curious to see where this goes, to see where we go…”
I couldn’t stop my hands from shaking. I was coming down, and the ache in my head became a scream. But I couldn’t lower the weapon. The muscles in my arm had frozen.
“I know that you got the paternity tests …that’s how they found you Evie. I know you wanted to find out who the father was, and that’s why you’re in danger now. Let me help you. They want to pit us against one another. They want us to fight. But I saw you that night… you’re not really a killer at all, are you…?”
Though I held on with all my might, two fat tears escaped when I blinked hard and I stood there shaking, feeling them roll down my cold face and onto my cheeks.
“I never… I never got the results back from the clinic,” I said. The more I held in the shaking the more it seemed to morph into sobs in my chest. His hand rose up, curled around the barrel of the gun and gently pushed it aside.
“I’m the father, Evie,” he said quietly, pushing my arms down and to the ground so all the tension fell away. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Big sobs wracked through me and I began to cry. The gun fell from my hands and thudded into the wet ground below.
He leapt forward and wrapped his arms around me.
“I just want to protect you,” he said. Hot tears streaming down my face, I pulled away and shoved him hard against his chest. I couldn’t do this.
“I don’t need your protection,” I spat. I must have been out of my mind. Maybe it was pregnancy hormones, or it was the stress of the situation, but no way in hell was I going to go gaga over some guy I barely knew.
I picked up the gun again, shook my head to clear it and wiped down my face with the back of my arm. I turned to hike down the path.