The sudden flare of jealousy that awakens in me is so violent I think I must react in some way because that’s the first time a smile breaks out on Max’s handsome face.
“Easy there tigress, it’s Alice.” He explains with a chuckle.
“Alice?”
“Yes, she has to be the best Criminal Prosecutor Assistant United States Attorney in all of the East Coast.” He explains and I can’t say I saw that coming, though the sharp intelligence in her eyes when I met her. . .
“I mean, you met her, she is razor sharp and her tongue would slice anyone open. So, I’m confident that he will be here within the next hour.”
And it’s been more than two hours and five minutes but who is counting?
As I watch the sun sink even lower, I can’t help but think just how true the spoken word by Rupi Kaur in her book, ‘Milk and Honey’ is in regard to the man that has all of my attention and my focus.
“He brings the sun to its knees every night”
And without him here with me, I’m not at peace, yet I just know, I need to move on. I need to finish what we started. I am the one they are out for. I am the one who has held this burning need for revenge and seeing the people that recently came into my life suffer because of this agenda is not something I’m willing to let slide.
So much doesn’t make sense. A lot of lies have been told since the day I bumped into the hard chest that belongs to Gideon Black and even though we came together in the name of working alongside each other to bring down a common enemy, secrets were withheld, and those secrets brought in much more trouble than we asked for.
The gnawing within me, the screeching alarms blaring in my head are all telling me that it’s going to get much worse and pretty soon too. I have to be prepared. I have to protect them. I’m already responsible for the death of one, that’s enough for me. Maybe if I left. . .
Maybe if I am far away from this place—away from him—he will be safe.
I’m unaware of the silent tears streaming down my eyes, standing there, my body covered by a soft fleece blanket that I found at the foot of the large bed. For some reason, it’s chilly in here. It’s chilly without him.
My vision becomes blurry but others senses of me are hard at work as I feel the intoxicating tingling that drowns me whenever he is near which allows me to feel him before I can even see or hear him.
It’s the crackling of the flow of energy between us—the current in the air shifts, becoming highly charged like the movement of electricity. It’s the way I feel the hairs at the back of my neck stand up on end. It’s the way my heart beat slows, and my breaths come in long, drawn-out pauses like I’m trying to calm down an erratic need within me. A need for him.
I take my time to turn around. I don’t want to look at him just yet, but who am I kidding, I’m starved. I need to take him in because I’ve felt robbed of him since the gala. I’ve felt like there are forces working extremely hard to keep us apart and just maybe. . .they are right.
But, I do need to see him. To make sure that he is alright at least. I turn around and there he is, standing in the open doorway, looking as dark, broody and downright intimidating as ever. I can feel his anger from all the way across the room making a shiver work down my spine, making me gasp.
His intense eyes that I missed so much pierce me, looking at and through me. Searching the depths of me. I watch—frozen in my place—as he peruses my body from head to toe, searching for something, analyzing me in a way that makes me shift from one foot to the other in discomfort. He can read me, at times too well. And I don’t know if I want that right now.
There is nothing sexual about the way he is looking at me, yet each point on my body that his eyes touch knows that it has been seen by him. Judging of course, by the way, I feel my blood rushing through my veins, heat pooling in areas that I would like to ignore but can’t.
He doesn’t say anything though, but his jaw is clenched tight. Then his gaze zeroes in on the bruises on my knee. The skin there is torn and it hurts when I move but I have gone past the pain now, able to manage it since I woke up. But Gideon only grows angrier and I know the sight of my bruise does nothing to pacify him. I move the blanket so that it covers the bruise. I can’t handle the way his anger is growing, festering and simmering just beneath the surface.
“Hey.” I whisper. Why am I whispering anyway? It’s almost like I’m talking to a lion that’s about to pounce. Trying to pacify it by being cautious but it’s not working, because his nose flares at the sound of my hoarse voice.
Our gazes are connected but something about my voice causes a shift in him and I don’t know what to make of the impassive expression that he now wears on his face. And then, he moves.
Shutting the door behind him with a calm unlike any I have ever seen from a human being before, he strides over to me with a sleek, easy stride. Not a lion, no. In this moment, Gideon might as well be the biggest, most feral sleek black panther.
He doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t acknowledge my greeting, nor does he take his eyes off of me. Our gazes still locked. My breathing falters, my anatomy is completely aware of his presence. As he moves towards me, I take him in, carefully studying him as best as I can. I wonder if he is hurt, but as I think that, I immediately dismiss that thought because I know, Gideon would never be assaulted by anyone. He is too confident and so dangerous to have anyone mess with him that way. Just one icy look from him would send bigger men fleeing.
He comes to a stop right in front of me. There is hardly any space separating us. I can feel, more than see the exhalations from his chest and I force myself to look up, craning my neck just to maintain eye contact. My fingers twitch and itch with the need to touch him, any part of him that I can.
“Drop it.” He rumbles out. I’m too transfixed in his stormy gaze, watching his irises dilate, that I don’t hear his command at first, but then it registers.
“What?” I hoarsely question, my brain playing catch up as I mentally try to extinguish the fire that he has started in me. I swear, Gideon is a force of destruction that I don’t need in my life, yet crave with my next breath.
“Drop the damn blanket, Charlotte.” He demands again, this time, his voice comes out like a growl. What does he mean drop the blanket? What does he want? I suddenly feel vulnerable, dressed in his large t-shirt with only the blanket covering me.
Apparently, it seems I’m testing his patience and at this particular moment, he has none to spare. “Damn you Charlotte, fucking drop that blanket and let me look at you.” He demands and this time, as if on autopilot, I drop the blanket that covers my body, immediately shivering because of the chilly breeze coming through the window. But I am in Gideon’s presence, I have all the heat that I need and then some—more than I can handle even.
He takes a step back and really looks at me. That’s when I realize that he wants to know where my bruises are, inspecting each one and making me feel self-conscious as he does so. His jaw clenches tighter and if my heart was thumping as fast and hard as it is now, I swear, I might even hear the grinding of his molars. His utterly kissable lips are drawn in a flat, angry line and his eyes, God, in his eyes is a battle I don’t think I want to take part in.
Because I know, I will lose.
“It’s just minor scraps here and there. I’m fine.” I inform him, scrambling to look for something to pacify him with. I don’t like the way he is studying me, as if he can see exactly what’s going on inside so I turn to look away but he doesn’t let me.
The burning touch of his fingers connects with my chin and he forces me to look up at him when it’s the last thing I want. He wipes the tears that I had long forgotten by now as delicately as he’s ever touched me and it makes me melt.
“Charlotte.”
It’s just one word, gritted out with a volatile mix of anger, frustration, worry and—oh my goodness—lust.
His gaze falls down to my wrist where the insertion wound of the drug is evident and I witness the involunta
ry stillness in him that I know, one wrong move can result in some disastrous consequences. For whom though, I’m not sure.
“Sam says the wounds will heal over and the bruises will disappear in time as well” I start, needing to fill the silence with something. Anything. “She rubbed some ointment on them and even told me that I don’t need band-aids either.”
I know I’m rambling but I don’t care. The silence from Gideon is so damn loud and deafening, I can’t stand it.
“Gideon. . . “
“Don’t.” He cuts me off, scorching me with his angry heated gaze.
“Don’t what?” I question.
“Don’t stand there looking at me like you are about to bolt.” He starts, stepping closer to me but I take a step back. I can’t handle his touch right now.
Yeah, he knows exactly what’s going on inside me and something tells me he isn’t going to allow me to face the truth. Well fuck that, I’m done being ‘protected’. By him or anyone else. A lot of things would be much easier than. . .
“I’m sorry but maybe in your absence, you might have noticed that a lot of things happened.”
“Charlotte. . .”
But I cut him off, walking away from him.
“He’s dead Gideon or did you miss that?” I demand, hot angry tears falling down my eyes. “John is dead and it’s all my fault I should have. . .” I pace around the room but he cuts me off, striding towards me.
“Damn you Charlotte, none of what happened is your fault. If anything, I am to blame.” He says as he grabs me by my arms and I can’t deal with all of it. “Do you have any idea the hell I have been in these past however long hours?”
“Well, I’m sorry but I can’t say I feel any sympathy for you—seeing as this is now bigger than I first thought!”
“You think I knew any of this beforehand? You think I knew any of this was going to happen?!”
“Yes! Because you knew something was going down and you decided not to tell me about it!” I say as I shake his hold off of me and move away from him. I know it’s a low blow, none of this is his fault but I’m wounded, the weight of John’s death is on my shoulders and I don’t know how to handle it all.
“What exactly did you think I knew?” He questions after a beat. We stare at each other, him looking at me with new eyes now. No longer is he impassive, but now, he is calculating and I know he is about to manipulate me.
But that’s just the thing, even when I know he knows how to extract anything from me, I still allow him to do so against my better judgment.
“The syndicate. You knew about that. All you told me was Caleb’s father was there and just a little bit about them but you never once told me anything else like why the hell they are interested in me!”
“And what about you? When were you going to let me in on your deal with Lorenzo?” He questions as he glides over to me and I try to back away.
One more step and I’m plastered to the wall, right beside the windows. He crowds me in, not backing away any time soon.
“Were you ever going to let me in on your little secret or did you think maybe you have an ace in the hole that you can use against me?”
His voice is silky, his gaze sharp and cold, making me shiver.
“Gideon. . .” I start.
“Did you think he was going to help you find the truth about you?” He goes on, ignoring the way I’m shivering as his hand glides oh so softly up my thigh and grips my hip and the other hand goes to the nape of my neck and straight into my hair.
“You have no idea what you are talking about.” I say, trying to keep my composure. I don’t want him to know just how much he affects me. Just how much he derails me from my perfectly laid out plans.
“You thought, since he gave you some kind of information about your parents or whatever, that he was on your side and that I was not to be trusted huh?” He is taunting me and I can’t keep my eyes off of him.
“I never said that. I never said I don’t trust you.” I cry out on a gasp as he tugs my hair, bringing a cry out of me. It’s not painful but it did catch me unaware.
“Yet your actions speak for you.”
“I was going to tell you, but when were you going to tell me?” I demand, looking him straight in the eyes. I won’t back down even as my body grows softer each second that passes by. His fingers dig into my hip and I know, there is going to be a bruise there.
“You are a smart, calculating woman, Charlotte. All your life you have been a go getter and I know for a fact that if you want something, you just go for it. It has never stopped you from quickly jumping to work with me, has it.” He taunts, lowering his lips to my face, skimming my cheeks and jaw with feather light kisses that are driving me insane.
“You are a self-possessed asshole!” I spit out, trying to push him away. He makes me so angry and some of the things he says just drive me to the brink.
“You know, all you had to do was ask. All you had to do was come to me with any question you might have but you didn’t.” He says as his body plasters mine to the wall. I can feel his large, thick length pressing into my stomach, but his hard gaze is still trained on me. Uncompromising, not yielding and definitely pissed off.
“You stood there, in my living room, and demanded that I be completely honest with you, yet you couldn’t be bothered with being the same. Now you think I’m just going to let this slide, that I’m just going to let you blame me.”
“Nobody is blaming you for anything.” I say, but this time my voice doesn’t have all the rage it possessed before. It’s weaker somehow and I feel like he just punched me in the stomach.
“You are blaming me for what happened, while blaming yourself for John’s death.”
I flinch and try to look away but he tugs my hair again, maintaining eye contact with me, while simultaneously grinding into me, making me gasp.
I feel at odds with myself. On the one hand, I want a fight. I want to argue with him and then on the other hand, I need him to take away all this pain. I need him to fuck me because only he can awaken my body because he is the one who knows just how to do so. He is the only one that can effortlessly make me feel this way. Wild and in need of his dominating touch.
“You don’t know a thing about me or what I’m feeling. . .” I spit out, all the hurt and pain evident in my voice but I don’t get to finish because he cuts me off. He sweeps in so fast and savagely kisses me into silent submission, biting my lower lip as he does, making me gasp. But he doesn’t stop there.
I’m pinned by over six feet four of hot, angry and impossibly aroused male and my treacherous body is literally begging for him to use me in any way that he wants. He kisses me, giving me all the rough pent up emotions that I feel deep within me. He kisses me like he is taking everything in me. The parts that he knows as well as the parts I have kept to myself all this time. He doesn’t let up, nor does he go easy on me.
That softly, bubbly stuff is gone as we go at each other like hurt, wounded animals, driven by the need to mate and heal each other as best as we can.
I push at his hard chest, wanting some space but he growls and bites my lower lip again, drawing some blood and continues to kiss me. I can feel the heat in between my legs, I know I am soaked and I want him. He pulls away from me and then tugs at my hand, spinning me around until my back in plastered to his hard, front.
“You keep parts of yourself away from everyone. Your own best friend doesn’t know that part of you but I know and that’s what scares you the most.” He says, grinding into my ass and I shiver.
Surely, he doesn’t mean to be rough with me. I have always known that Gideon keeps a certain part of him away but tonight, I don’t think he is going to hold back.
“I’m not scared!” I’m scrambling here, falling apart at his hands but this time, for different reasons.
Gideon is reigning down havoc on my body in an intense way I have never experienced with him before, but more than that, he is mentally probing and pushing me with all of th
ese questions, I can’t think straight. I’m experiencing a sensual overload, over stimulated by him, until all I can think, all I can feel in me and around me is him.
“Yes, yes you are and you know what, you should be.” His ominous voice is low and deep.
His voice is like a savage growl. If I was questioning just how angry he is, I have my answer now. He is so damn angry with me.
“I’m going to show you the error of your ways. Lying to me is one thing, lying to yourself and putting everyone around you in danger is another.” He informs as he roughly tugs at my t-shirt, ripping it apart and then he grabs ahold of my tits, pinching them in a painful manner that almost has me seeing stars.
“Gideon.” I’m shocked and gasping at this new pleasure-pain of his touch but he doesn’t listen to me.
He rips the t-shirt all the way, and through the moonlight now shining through the room, I see the strain of his veins on his forearms and hear the harsh deep breaths he takes.
“I’m going to show you just who you are.” He savagely growls in my ear, his harsh voice making me almost climax. “You look fucking sexy with my boxer briefs on. Were you thinking about me with them on, rubbing that sweet, greedy pussy?” A loud moan escapes me as he makes short work of dropping his boxer-briefs down my legs and I’m all but writhing in his arms, wanton and needing to be satisfied, yet I feel like running away as well.
The sound of him unzipping his pants has me salivating, and I’m desperate for him. I can feel his long, thickness taunting my butt chick and the next thing, Gideon slaps one of them making me gasp out loud. Fuck, I’m flooded and so ready for him.
“Gideon please. . .” I cry out.
And with that savage vow, he kicks my legs apart with his shoes, pulls my hair back and brings a hand down the middle of back to force me forward and then I can’t help but stand on my tip toes. And just like that, drives right into me, making me scream into the endless night. My wet, hungry and greedy channel taking him in with a bite of pain that I welcome.
Billion Dollar Hearts (Inconguity Series Book 3) Page 5