by Claire Kent
Sabrina slowed down too. “What what? Why do you look so gut-foundered?”
Lori didn’t answer. She just stared blindly ahead of her and tried to process this new information.
Apparently, Sabrina could put the pieces together on her own. “Didn’t he do all that with you?”
“Yeah. No. I don’t know.” Unable to get her legs to move, Lori climbed off the elliptical trainer and picked up her towel to wipe off her hot, red face.
“Lori?” Sabrina got off too. “Tell me.”
“We shared a room,” Lori admitted. “And we didn’t spend much time talking about money.”
“Why not?”
Lori felt mortified all of a sudden—for no good reason. She couldn’t even look Sabrina in the eye. “I don’t know. It all just sort of felt... natural.”
“Natural? A weekend with a male escort?” Sabrina’s voice conveyed ironic skepticism.
“I know it sounds weird. But it did. We like each other. I think. I mean, we’ve gotten to know each other. And so it doesn’t feel so much like... like an impersonal business transaction.”
“Oh God,” Sabrina groaned into her towel. “Pretty Woman.”
“It’s not like that,” Lori snapped. “I’m not stupid. But we get along well. And so most of the business stuff just sort of falls to the side and we just have a good time.”
“He has a good time too?”
“I don’t know.” Lori tried not to squirm with embarrassment. “Sometimes I think so. It’s hard to tell—because he has such good instincts about what a client wants from him—but I’m pretty sure he has a decent time with me.”
“That doesn’t sound like a normal scenario with a male escort and his client.”
Lori scowled. “How the hell do you know what’s normal with a male escort? I don’t even know. I’ve never been with another one.”
“Well,” Sabrina said, her face softening with humor. “I guess that’s true. Who’s to know what normal behavior consists of when it comes to male escorts? But it sounds a little suspicious to me. Like things aren’t entirely professional.”
“They are professional,” Lori insisted. “I pay him every evening. He’s just really good at his job. He gives women what they want.”
“Maybe. But maybe you should dig into it a little to make sure. Have you thought about talking to him about how you are together?”
Stiffening, Lori said a little awkwardly, “No, I haven’t. He’s told me quite clearly that he breaks off the business arrangement when a client tries to go beyond professional boundaries.”
“Oh. I see.” After thinking about this for a moment, Sabrina added, “And you’re not willing to take that risk.”
“What risk? It’s a done deal. He made that more than clear. No more appointments for a client who tries to break those boundaries. I know this thing can’t last forever, but I’m having a good time with him, and I don’t want it to end yet.”
Sabrina studied her—a little suspiciously, she thought. But for once, her cousin didn’t say anything.
Lori let out a long breath. Her legs felt weak from the exercise, and her face was blazing red.
And she felt strangely uncomfortable in the wake of this particular conversation.
LORI LAY NEXT TO ANDER on the bed of her hotel room and stared up at the ceiling. “Are you going to retire?” she blurted out.
Ander’s neck twitched spasmodically, jerking his head over to look at her. “What?”
She found the courage to glance over at him. Saw his expression was still, almost frozen. “I asked if you were going to retire,” she admitted, feeling a surge of mortification at the random, revealing question.
It was almost seven thirty on Friday evening. Just last weekend they’d been in Quebec. Just last Monday Lori had talked to Sabrina on the elliptical trainers. And both things had been on her mind all week.
When Ander had arrived, they’d talked for a while about casual issues and then had fallen into a silence that felt almost tired. They hadn’t yet touched, and now Lori had been foolish enough to blurt out a question she never should have asked.
Ander replied with a slow, careful sentence. “I assume I’ll retire one day.”
“Yeah. I would imagine so. I meant anytime soon.”
“Why do you ask?”
She gave a helpless shrug. Sorted through a few possible responses and landed on the truthful one. “My cousin was talking to one of your old clients. And she said you were retiring.”
Ander’s lips parted slightly, as if he now understood where the question was coming from. But he didn’t answer immediately.
Lori felt her pulse start to pound as she watched the subtle flickers of emotion cross his face—the flutter of a jaw muscle, the tightening of his mouth, the blink of his eyelashes. She unconsciously held her breath as she waited.
She wasn’t even sure which answer she wanted to hear. Part of her wanted him to say yes, wanted him to give up this line of work and find something to do that would really fulfill him, that would make him feel like something more valuable than a piece of meat. Maybe doing this job wasn’t unhealthy for some people, but she was worried it was unhealthy for Ander, so he would probably be better off if he didn’t do it.
But the selfish part of her was terrified that he was going to drop her as a client, that she’d never see him again.
Either way, she was more invested in this answer than was entirely healthy.
Finally Ander said, “I would have told you if I no longer wanted you as a client.”
Lori swallowed hard. Then let out her breath. “Yeah. I assumed you would. But I guess this former client seemed pretty sure of your retirement.”
Ander cleared his throat. His blue-gray eyes were oddly tentative. He opened his mouth to speak. But then shut it again without shaping a word.
“What is it?” she asked breathlessly, tilting her head toward him instinctively.
He shook his head and glanced away. “I told you I was cutting back on my clients. And I had to tell her something.”
“Yeah. That’s what I told Sabrina. I figured it was just an excuse. I mean, it would be kind of rude for you to retire without telling me, wouldn’t it?” She smiled at him, trying for ironic teasing although she still felt oddly nervous and embarrassed.
He returned her smile easily, and Lori relaxed a little. Everything was as it always was between them. There was no reason for her to get so uptight about what Sabrina had told her on Monday.
“Oh, I meant to tell you,” she said. “I’m going to be out of town for a couple of weeks at the beginning of next month.”
“Work trip?” he asked, arching his eyebrows.
It was actually a book tour for her new release, but Lori cut off the explanation before she spoke it. Ander didn’t know she was Lucy Anderson, and it might become too obvious if she said she was going on a book tour right when Lucy Anderson’s highly anticipated new romance was released.
“Yeah,” she said vaguely. “Something like that.”
Ander nodded and didn’t pursue the subject.
They lay side by side, and both stared up at the ceiling for a few minutes.
“So your new book is coming out on the first of the month?” Ander asked at last, speaking casually and without any prelude.
“Ye—” Lori answered automatically before she realized what he’d just asked. She jerked up to a sitting position with a gasp and stared down at his bland face. “You know?”
Ander gave her a slight, sheepish smile. “Guilty.”
Lori’s heart hammered, and her belly twisted—with a collection of emotions she couldn’t entirely work out. “You’ve known all along?” She was dismayed to hear the hint of betrayal in her words.
Shaking his head, Ander sat up too. “No. When we talked about it at first, I had no idea. But I’ve reread some of your books in the last few months, and I kept seeing... seeing you in them.”
“Oh.” Lori felt herself blushing for some re
ason.
“I thought it must be you. And then, last weekend, it didn’t take too much searching to discover what writers’ conference was being held in Quebec during those days and who the keynote speaker was. It just affirmed my suspicions.”
Lori slumped back on the bed, releasing a long, shaky breath. She should have known Ander was too sharp and observant to hide something like this from.
A tiny little part of her was glad he knew. Glad he knew that she was his favorite romance writer.
Ander reclined back as well, but his face was turned toward her, his eyes resting on her face. “Are you upset?”
“No,” she admitted, turning to smile at him almost bashfully. “I guess not. I mean, now that I know you, I feel pretty safe about a story not appearing in the tabloids about how Lucy Anderson has been using the services of a sex professional for the last six months.”
Ander’s eyes were unusually sober. And after a moment of silence he said, “I hope you believe that.”
“I do. I know you’re not going to the press with the story.”
“The story will never come out through me,” he murmured. Then his lips twitched a little. “It won’t even appear in my true-life confessions best seller.”
“Hey,” she said, giving him a reproachful look. “Don’t mock the book idea. I was serious about that.”
“I know you were.” For just a few seconds, his smile looked almost tender. Then the softness disappeared in his easy irony. “Although it was a rash suggestion since you don’t even know if I can string together two sentences.”
Lori sniffed disdainfully. “Please. Someone as intelligent and articulate as you? Of course you can write. Besides, you don’t have to be a brilliant writer. Just interesting and basically coherent. You’d have an editor to clean things up.”
Ander chuckled. “You’re serious about this.”
“Yes. I am. Why shouldn’t I be? Just say the word, and I’ll do anything I can to help.”
That softness flickered in his eyes again, disappearing just as quickly as before. “I appreciate it. But I’m not sure I’m a project worth pursuing.”
Lori hated the resignation she heard in his last words. It was worse than the bitterness she heard far more often. She opened her mouth to argue but then changed her mind.
Nothing she could say would change his mind about himself, would make him believe he had true value.
She reached over and turned his head toward her again, keeping her palm on his cheek. Then she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his.
She had no delusions about the powers of her kiss. It wasn’t going to change anything about his attitude toward himself. Couldn’t reshape his whole world. But it was the only thing she could think of to do to express how she felt at the moment.
And she needed to do something.
Ander responded immediately to her kiss, but he let her take complete control of it. His mouth opened, and his tongue moved at her urging. But he didn’t roll over or reach out to touch her.
They kissed for a long time, joined only by their mouths and Lori’s hand on his cheek. It felt sweet and oddly innocent, and Lori felt both her body and her emotions responding. But eventually she wanted more, so she slid her hand down to his chest and then lower to his abdomen. Ander wore a slate-blue dress shirt, and she stroked his belly through the expensive fabric.
She loved the feel of the flat, firm muscles there, rising and falling with his accelerating breathing.
Then she slid her hand even lower. To the front of his trousers. Realized he was already getting hard.
Lori wondered why he wasn’t making any moves, why he just lay on the bed and let her kiss and caress him.
Sometimes Ander was so unknowable she wanted to scream.
She wanted to know how he was feeling. She wanted him to feel as deep and overwhelmed as she did at the moment. She wanted him to react to her with genuine pleasure and affection.
She wanted him to respond to her in a way he did with no other client. No one else but her.
And suddenly she knew what she wanted to do.
Her hands moved to his belt and started to unhook the buckle. Then she unfastened his trousers and untucked his shirt. Started to slowly unbutton it, baring his chest to her view. She slid his shirt off his shoulders. And then she started to push off his trousers.
Only then did Ander help by lifting up his hips. His eyes hadn’t left her face the whole time she undressed him, and his gaze was quiet and questioning with a depth she didn’t understand.
“Ander,” she said at last, surprised her voice came out so unsteadily. “Can I...”
Ander found and held her self-conscious gaze. “Lori, you can do whatever you want.”
The words made her belly twist at the same time they reassured her. “I wanted to... I’ll need to add some money to the envelope, but I...”
“Lori, just tell me what you want.”
“Oral sex,” she managed to choke out, her cheeks burning hotly. After all this time, it was silly to be embarrassed. But she was. Not so much by the act but by the vulnerability of saying she wanted it.
Ander’s brows drew together, and he started to turn on his side and push himself up. “Of course. I can—”
“No,” she interrupted, realizing he’d misunderstood. “I wanted to do it.” She swallowed hard. “On you.”
“Oh.”
“Can I?”
Ander froze for a moment. “Yes,” he said softly. “If you want.”
“I do.”
For a minute they just looked at each other. Then Ander rolled off the bed and walked over to his case, where he pulled out a foil packet. “This condom will be easier for you to use. It’s slightly mint flavored, and it will taste a lot better than latex.”
Lori nodded and watched as Ander rid himself of his boxers and returned to the bed. He was already almost fully erect.
He handed her the condom and lay back down on the bed on his back. He stared up at her face and waited.
Lori really wanted to do this, but she was also getting very nervous. “I’ve never done this before,” she said. “I won’t know what I’m doing. You’ll have to help.”
“Of course. Anything you want.”
She scooted down on the bed until her face was in range of his groin. She stared down at his erect cock, a deeper shade than the rest of his body. She thought she saw it twitch as she watched.
Her eyes darted back to his face, and he gave her a little smile. Oddly comforted, she laughed nervously. “I’m not going to be any good at it—just to warn you. And I hope you’re not going to expect anything fancy. I mean, you’re not going to go down my throat or anything, are you?”
Ander’s lips twitched, although his gaze was still that quiet, intense one. “Of course not. I’ll just lie here and let you do your thing. Just tell me if you want anything different.”
Lori snickered at his choice of words. And then she inhaled a long, shuddering breath. She took his cock in her hands and stroked it for a minute, running her fingers up and down the shaft and then twirling the tip a little.
She liked how he sucked in his breath very slightly at her touch. And how she could feel his erection twitch and harden under her fingers.
Since he was plenty erect already, she opened the condom packet and carefully rolled it on. He’d always taken care of the condoms before, so she made sure she got it on securely and didn’t nick it with her fingernails.
Then she adjusted her body on the bed, leaning over so her face was hovering above his pelvis. She held his cock upright with her hands and experimentally licked a line in a circle near the top of his shaft.
She heard Ander’s breath hitch, and she smacked her mouth around the taste of the condom. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t terribly unpleasant. She imagined it would be better without a condom at all, but that was out of the question, of course.
Looking back up at Ander’s face, she saw his handsome features were tense and unread
able. Again, she wondered what he was thinking. Whether he really wanted her to do this to him.
She wondered whether it would please him. She wanted to please him. The way he’d always pleased her.
She took a breath and then licked his cock again, this time going from the bottom to the top. Then she took the head in her mouth and started to suck.
On the first hollowing of her cheeks, Ander gasped and his hands shifted slightly on the bed. Assuming this meant he liked it, she took more of him in her mouth and sucked again.
It felt like his cock was pulsing, even through the latex of the condom, and the more suction she applied, the tenser his body became.
She knew there was more she should do as part of a blow job, and she tried to focus her scattered thoughts on the scenes she’d read in books for something to add to the sucking. Landing on a couple of ideas, even through the blurred excitement of her mind, she wrapped one hand around the bottom half of his shaft and used the other to stroke one of his thighs.
She had a little trouble coordinating the squeezing with the sucking. She fumbled around for a minute before she let his cock slip from her mouth.
Her eyes met Ander’s. She sensed rather than saw a tension coiled tightly beneath the surface of his expression, of his body. But he’d been as good as his word. He hadn’t moved at all.
“Aren’t you going to help me?” she asked thickly. Only then did she realize that she was aroused as well. Her nipples were tight beneath the red lace of her chemise, and she was already wet between her legs.
“Of course,” he murmured, his voice unusually low and textured. He moved one hand to the back of her head. “But you were doing great.”
She wrapped her hand more firmly around the base of his erection and lowered her mouth again, taking in as much of him as she comfortably could. She started to suck again, and this time Ander applied gentle pressure, guiding the bobbing of her head and helping to create a pleasing rhythm.
His hand curved around the back of her skull, his fingers tangled in her hair, and the pressure felt reassuring rather than bossy. She hollowed out her cheeks to the tempo of his soft urging, and her motion became more confident as she progressed.