I was also using more discipline on my shields. I kept my shields up all the time to protect from magical attacks even if I didn’t see them coming, not just my recent need to shield my magic from the pack, but like Chris, during my resting state out of battle they weren’t quite perfect.
It gave me something useful to focus on between restoring memories for each of the San Antonio coven. I was very careful not to read them myself.
I also hadn’t contacted Jared yet, and after calling him for help I knew he was waiting. I wasn’t even sure what to tell him about what happened, and I certainly wasn’t in the mental space to hold my own against the alpha in an argument. A part of me knew my mate wouldn’t hold the weakness against me, alpha werewolf or not, but it still mattered to me.
It was just after eight when we finished, and we gathered for dinner in the very large dining room.
Barbara was just under a thousand, and she had blonde hair, blue eyes, and a body I’d have usually envied if I was in my right mind. She was also dressed to the nines, with a red cocktail dress, jewelry that had to be worth millions, and wore designer black high heels, silk stockings, and makeup. It seemed strange to me, until I realized that was her armor, and what she needed to boost her confidence after everything she’d gone through the last week.
Her chief of security Thomas, was a mountain of a man to rival any shifter I’d ever seen, even Bob, and he had light brown hair and hazel eyes. He should have been intimidating, but he had a very disarming presence and his eyes were warm. At least, for us he did.
They were both… extraordinarily friendly with all of us given the circumstances, and I couldn’t help but be impressed with them both. The rest of the coven looked rather like Lisa, Kelly, and I, which is to say a bit shell shocked. I also felt guilty for being so weak, my own issues felt small next to theirs.
Barbara said, “Please, enjoy the meal. You are all welcome here at any time. There’s simply no way to thank you enough for what you did for my coven and I.”
A guilty look flashed across Melody’s face, it wasn’t her fault at all, but she seemed to be blaming herself for being gone when the air sorcerer came back. In hindsight it was obviously a trap, we’d just mistakenly thought the trap was complete when the coven was knocked out.
Ceara replied, “He needed to be stopped.”
Ceara had a bland expression on her face, a mask over her feelings. Over the last few days I’d gotten a glimpse of the woman underneath the mantle as head of vampire society. I also knew she was struggling, this had been the second time she’d been helpless in a fight with me present, and she didn’t like it at all.
I couldn’t blame her. It also helped me understand just how leery she was of sorcerers, and specifically how I would turn out after a few years in this world. I also hoped it would mean she’d trust me more, this was the second time I could have ended her, but didn’t. It hadn’t even occurred to me until that moment. I’d actually been worried about her.
Barbara asked, “Have you made any progress in finding others for the council?”
Ceara replied, “Not as yet. I’ve been considering an idea one of mine made, to offer to combine covens. I don’t suppose that would appeal to you Barb?”
Barbara took a sip of wine to give herself a second to compose an answer, and consider the ramifications of such a thing.
“I’d consider it and speak with my people,” she looked around, “Either way we need a new coven house. This place is… tainted now.”
Ceara replied, “There’s no hurry, if we do go that way, we’ll need a much larger condo building, or a mansion, which means building. Although, there is enough room to double up until the larger one is ready, all the condos have two bedrooms.”
That made sense, the coven could afford to buy a larger condo building, but we couldn’t exactly kick out the current residents. Well, we could relocate them all with some compulsions, but I didn’t think Ceara would. She didn’t use her power for unnecessary shortcuts.
Barbara looked amused, “That wouldn’t be a hardship for us, we’re used to having rooms in the same house already. I admit it’s tempting if I get to keep my people, but I need some time.”
We moved on to lighter conversation at that point, and I found myself hoping Barbara would accept the offer.
She had a good soul, even if she was way too gorgeous to do my self-esteem any good.
Chapter Nineteen
I groaned when my alarm went off at seven on Thursday morning. My head had a slight ache, and I knew thanks to my vampire healing, I’d manage to avoid another major hangover. A second later I scented both Kelly to my right, and Lisa to my left. I looked down, and felt a wave of relief when I saw the night shirt, at least I had on more than just underclothes this time.
Last night was a bit fuzzy, but after our ordeal we weren’t quite ready to be alone, or even sleep, when we got back to the coven around ten. We’d wound up going to B&B, drank a lot of alcohol despite the promise I’d made to myself to never do it again. We also played pool… badly. When we’d gotten back to the coven late last night, none of us wanted to be alone, so we’d crashed together. It had seemed very logical at the time.
I looked around and frowned, I wasn’t even in my own bed, this was Lisa’s condo.
Lisa said, “Wow Miku, you were amazing last night. The way you did that thing…” she trailed off meaningfully.
I giggled, “Don’t start with that crap again, I remember last night… mostly.”
Kelly sighed in mock sorrow, “Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. I had fun watching though.”
I snorted, “You two are crazy. I need a shower, and I have to be at Legends by eight.”
I felt a stab of guilt at that, there’d been no Jared dream last night. I’d only myself to blame for that, I guess I hadn’t wanted to see him when I was such a mess. It was my power that did it after all, and it obeyed my desire.
I had talked to him though, before we went to B&B, just to tell him we were back in town, still alive, and that I’d see him tomorrow. I’d avoided going into any details though, and was sure he’d be after me for more later.
Lisa replied, “I have guard duty at eight.”
Kelly nodded, “Me too, downstairs, breakfast in ten?”
We all agreed. I grabbed my pile of stuff, both weapons and clothes, and headed back to my condo. Ten minute showers were possible with vampire speed, even for three women. We could be even faster of course, but vampire speed couldn’t help with washing long hair.
The hot water felt great, and I felt a little more like myself that morning. I still had to work through what happened, but I wasn’t in shock like some disconnected from life zombie anymore. Based on the banter, Lisa and Kelly had seemed past the initial shock of it as well.
I put on a pair of jeans, a loose red t-shirt, and a pair of comfortable sandals. My knife sheaths went on my jeans at the small of my back and left side, and my sword over my shoulder. I grabbed my phone, and then my laptop bag since I still had to type up a report.
Apparently I was the slow one, as I headed down the stairs I noted that Kelly and Lisa were already downstairs sitting with Cheryl, Andrew, Paul, Jerry, Tammy, and Matt. I grabbed a tray of food, and joined them.
“Morning.”
Tammy smiled, “So I hear you’re a hero?”
I felt a chill and didn’t really want to talk about yesterday yet. Both Lisa and Kelly must have seen my reaction, because they sent me an apologetic look.
I shrugged, “It was pretty bad, the rogue was stronger than me, but I caught him by surprise when he foolishly let down his guard.”
I deflected, “Any plans for this weekend while I slave away for you?”
Tammy snickered, “Not really, I think we’re staying here this weekend. Although, you might not see us at all.”
Matt choked on a piece of sausage, and turned red.
To my relief, the conversation stayed away from what happened yesterday for the rest of the m
eal, and focused on what everyone’s plans were, and training…
I got to Legends a little early, and just left the back door unlocked for the pack as I walked through the kitchen and into the office. I pulled out my laptop and booted it up, and started to type up my report.
Jared’s scent, when he came in the bar, hit me like a punch in the stomach, and I felt conflicted feelings rise in me. I wanted to both hide, and run to him. I settled on neither, and kept typing, until I saw him standing in the doorway with a concerned look in his eyes. I imagined he could scent each one of my roiling emotions.
“Miku?”
My heart won the tug of war, and without the conscious decision to do so, I had my arms wrapped around him, and my body up against his, as fast as a fifty-year-old vampire could move. I burrowed my face into his chest, and sighed in pleasure as his arms went around me.
It made no sense, out of the two of us I was strongest, but for the first time since Chris hovered over us in the backyard of the San Antonio coven, I felt completely safe, cherished, and loved.
Tears gathered in my eyes, and he held me tighter when I squeezed him tighter.
“Miku?”
My voice was scratchy, “I love you Jared. Yesterday was… bad.”
I cry chuckled at the understatement, and must have been quite a sight, getting snot and tears all over Jared’s shirt. This also hadn’t been how I’d pictured things would be the first time I told him that I loved him.
I’d been hurt before in battle, badly, but there was something about loss of will, and having my mind invaded that made it so much worse.
Jared closed the door, and picked me up and walked over the chair and sat down. It was a testament to my state of mind, that I didn’t object to that treatment. In fact, I curled up in his lap and was fairly content at the thought of never leaving it.
“Tell me what happened.”
I almost cried at that, his tone of voice wasn’t a command as I’d feared it would be, but concerned, worried, and full of love. I was sure the overbearing protective argument would come, but apparently he was putting it off.
The man I loved had depths I didn’t know about yet, and I looked forward to learning them all.
I started out haltingly, but told him everything that had happened. The hardest part was when I told him about how Chris had used compulsion to prevent me from using mind speech. When I realized what was going to happen to me, and that I wouldn’t even have a chance to say goodbye.
That I’d never get a chance to tell him how much I loved him.
Jared comforted me with his touch, and with soft murmuring as I got it all out.
I felt a bit better after that, but I knew I wasn’t over it yet, it would take time. I also felt a little selfish, I’d just justified all his fears that his mate puts herself in danger all the time. But I also knew hiding it wasn’t the right way either, this felt right, complicated, but right.
Nothing worth doing was easy, and surely that included the relationship with my mate.
He said, “You… kicked him off this plane of existence. That’s a pretty hard core ass kicking.”
I laughed into his chest.
He said, “I love you too, we’ll figure this out, and no doubt drive each other crazy, but I’m really glad you told me.”
After a moment he asked, “Is that why you weren’t in my dream last night?”
I nodded against his chest, “I wasn’t hiding it from you exactly, I just wasn’t ready to talk to you about it yet.”
Jared asked, “Are you coming home with me tonight?”
“Only another rogue emergency, and a direct order from Ceara could stop me.”
He chuckled, “Let’s hope things stay quiet, at least for a little bit.”
I kissed him, and then stood up. I had to finish my report, and he had construction to do, even if I’d rather spend all day with him.
Things did stay quiet for a few days.
I managed to work out the last two days at Legends, which reopened that Saturday night. Not that I got to go to the reopening, I was busy working at Pulse that night.
I did get to spend most of Saturday with Reah, and I discovered that werewolf women shopped for dresses that were easy to take off, for shifting speed. As a result, I ended up with a simple but elegant red sundress, and a new pair of creamy white open toed sandals.
Reah was turning into a great friend, and despite my guilt I enjoyed her company and the day. The guilt of course was because Reah and her father weren’t really talking at the moment, they’d apparently had a huge fight about her spending any time with me. I knew it wouldn’t be a cure all, but I really hoped the ally bond made a difference there.
I may have felt guilty, but Jared was my soul mate, and I was his chosen life mate. One man’s foolish prejudice couldn’t be allowed to come between that, even if it did complicate it. I didn’t even really even dislike Ted anymore, I just felt pity for him, because of both the wife he’d lost, and what he’d become because of it. He was almost a pariah in the pack, and I didn’t really expect him to show up to the ritual.
I hadn’t gained in power from my intense fight with the sorcerer, I still believed it would take a couple of years before my power grew again. But I was much more used to it now, and more comfortable controlling it.
My two nights bartending at Pulse had been mostly quiet. We did have to deal with two rogues, but they were just young arrogant idiots who shouldn’t have been turned in the first place, they had no agendas, plots, or designs on ending Ceara’s reign. I didn’t even have to get involved, Andrew, Paul, and Steven had no trouble taking care of them.
In short, life went on, and the horror and helplessness I’d felt at Chris’s hands faded a bit more each day. Kelly and Lisa seemed okay too, but I knew they’d seen a lot more than me. Over a hundred or not, I’d still only been out and about in the world for three weeks.
Epilogue
The scent of the forest, and the sounds of nature in the night calmed my nerves, as I returned Reah’s smile.
I wore the simple red sundress, with the sandals I’d brought, and that was it. My weapons, cell phone, and other things were in Jared’s bedroom. I didn’t even have my shield up as I stood among the pack, completely vulnerable.
Without complete trust, there could be no bond. As far as external threats, I had to trust that my mile reach would be sufficient to guard against any crashers.
Fortunately, Ted wasn’t there, but the other twenty-seven werewolves were, as well as another pack ally, the lion shifter Carly. She’d told me the ritual was an amazing experience, and she tried to be here each time they did it.
Jared, Bob, Reah, Tim, Cade, and Harris, along with a few others, all looked excited, and welcoming. The others were here, and that was enough. The magic would reveal the truth, when the bond either failed, or succeeded.
“Are you ready?” Reah asked me.
I nodded, and the pack formed into a circle and held hands. I wound up between Reah and Jared.
There were no circles or arcane symbols on the ground, this was intrinsic magic to werewolves and the pack, though only a mystic could shape and direct their natural air and fire magic with words and intent.
The night was still, and I felt calm and sure, if there was one thing I knew, Jared was my mate, and this pack was my family. Perhaps not under the tenets as a spirit sorceress, but for me, the woman Miku, I knew that they were my family now.
I had two families, the coven and pack, and I’d find a way to be true to both, though I still wasn’t sure how.
It started out small as Reah muttered a short phrase I couldn’t quite make out, over and over. A chant. There was a glimmer of fire magic, and then earth, followed by fire as the cycle repeated itself. I had to remind myself to breathe, as the magic started to get stronger, and I realized it was running around the circle from person to person, including through me.
I knew if I were to raise my spirit shield, I would break the circuit. I had t
o trust that Reah meant me no harm, as I felt the warmth of the fire, and the feel of the earth pass through me again and again, both growing in power and speed as it ran through us all, and connected us.
Trusting Reah was easy, I wasn’t even slightly tempted to raise my shield.
I sighed in wonder, as the magic sped up to the point it was leaving after image trails, and seemed to be in all of us at once. The pack seemed to glow to my magical vision. I not only sensed the magic now, but I could feel the pack around me as the bond started to form.
I couldn’t read their minds, or even specific emotions, but I felt a general sense of well-being. I was fairly sure it was the fire magic doing that. I also felt like I belonged, and each and every one of them held importance.
The earth magic bound me to the pack as an ally. Earth magic engendered loyalty, surety, and steadfastness. The idea of attacking one of them, or being attacked, was impossibly foreign. It amazed me, because I knew the bond between pack members was actually stronger, this amazing connection and feeling I had was just a weak echo for their allies.
Not because I was excluded on purpose, but because I had no earth and fire magic intrinsic to my own being, as the werewolves did. The magic tied me to them. Once the bond existed, much like the air bond between a master vampire and their turned, my shield wouldn’t stop it, or affect it.
Reah stopped the chant, and smiled. While the circling magic died, the connection between us was still there, the threads of fire and earth magic that connected me to the pack would be fed and maintained by the pack itself, their intrinsic magic. Much like my air magic as a vampire kept my sword enchantment viable.
Reah smiled and squeezed my hand, and I giggled when she gave me a hug. It was euphoric, and in that moment all my reservations fell away. I loved my friends in the coven, and I would never give them up, or my responsibilities, but I knew from this moment on, my home was here, with Jared, with the pack, and closer to nature.
Sorcerous Rogue: Spirit Sorceress: Book 3 Page 10