She didn’t let herself admire the view, instead putting her back to the window so that she could face Long Nu.
The woman was as graceful as ever, but Lyssa had the benefit now of being older, with ten years of hard living behind her. She was no longer scared of the old dragon. Or as naïve about her own power.
Eddie stood very close: an anchor, her broad shoulder to lean on. His presence helped her focus.
“Be honest,” said Lyssa. “You hoped I was dead, all these years.”
“Not exactly,” replied Long Nu in a cold, flat voice. “I found your parents after their murders. When I realized your mother had not killed the other Cruor Venator, I was upset. I was even more upset, though, when I didn’t find your body. I thought, maybe, if you lived. . that the witch who killed your family was raising you. Which, frankly, was a bomb waiting to go off that I did not look forward to dealing with.”
“Fuck,” said Roland, staring at her.
Eddie said nothing, but heat throbbed off his body, making the air shimmer around them. Lyssa basked in that warmth, breathing deep of it, making herself calm.
“I always suspected,” she said, “that you led the Cruor Venator to my family.”
Long Nu shook her head. “No, I did not do that. I promise you, I did not. But you cannot blame me for wishing that your mother had been strong enough to kill the witch.”
“My mother was strong enough. . but she gave her life to protect mine.” Fury thickened her voice, as did grief. “And yes, I wish she had killed Georgene. But only because I loved her. Not like you. . who only wanted to see the lesser of two monsters gone.”
Eddie’s hand curled around hers. “Maybe we should go.”
“No,” Roland said gruffly, staring at Long Nu. “Not you.”
Lyssa stepped closer to the old woman, ignoring both men. Power filled her, born from her own blood and spirit, and the dragon waking inside her. She could feel, on the edge of her spirit, the ability to make Long Nu afraid. Afraid, as Nikola and Betty had made others afraid.
But just before she accessed that power, she thought of Estefan, and pulled back.
“Why now, after all these years?” she asked softly.
Long Nu swayed, golden eyes gleaming. “Because the other Cruor Venator began killing. She took the life of a shape-shifter in Florida, one who knew you. . and I realized that she did not have you and that you were alive. And that maybe, just maybe, you might be the one to kill the lesser of two monsters.”
Anger filled Lyssa, and disdain. But after a moment, confusion crept upon her, as well.
Lyssa stared. “You knew she killed Estefan?”
“We discovered his murder just before we started looking for you in New York,” Roland said.
She took those words in. . and turned to look at Eddie. Searching, stunned. He did not hide from her gaze, but his eyes were filled with regret.
“How could I tell you?” he said softly. “How, when we first met, could I have said those words?”
“You could have,” she whispered, even though she knew he was right. It stung, though, that he had kept something so large and important from her. It hurt worse than she could have imagined. Tears threatened, but she pushed them down — and shook her head at him when he moved to touch her.
Eddie stilled. Lyssa summoned up all her strength and met Long Nu’s cool gaze.
“You,” she said in a hoarse voice. “I know how much you value your own skin. I suppose that’s why you didn’t come looking for me yourself. You always had such little faith in my mother. . and in me.”
Lyssa glanced at Eddie. “She sent you. . someone who would be a temptation if I’d gone bad. If you lived, she’d know I wasn’t entirely dangerous. If you died, she would have had another answer.”
His jaw tensed. Roland spun away to stare out the window.
Long Nu smoothed down her sleeves. “It was the only way to be sure about you. Perhaps you don’t remember the days of the old Cruor Venator, but I do. I would do anything to make certain that we not live through another genocide.”
“I would, too,” Lyssa whispered.
The old woman gave her a mirthless smile. “Then kill the other Cruor Venator. Do it fast, as you should have when you had the chance. And then never have children. So when you die. . finally. . it will be over. All of you will be gone.”
Lyssa stared, stunned to hear the vicious clarity of those words.
Eddie stepped forward, his eyes consumed with fury. Flames erupted over his arms, hot and crackling. The firelight reflected off his eyes, turning them briefly golden.
He reminded her, in that split second, of Lannes — when the witches had threatened his wife’s unborn baby.
Her belly clenched. No condoms this morning. She’d known what she was doing and hadn’t cared. She still didn’t. If she was pregnant. .
I’ll do what my mother did. I’ll love my baby. I’ll teach her love.
That was all anyone could do. And she would protect that child with her last breath.
“Stay the hell away from her,” growled Eddie.
“Yes, I made a mistake with you,” murmured Long Nu, unflinching as she met his enraged gaze. “I had no idea you would bond as mates. A Cruor Venator shares her protection with her blood match. It happens upon first meeting. I could feel it on you like slime when I saw you together in that elevator.”
Roland stepped in front of her. “Stop talking and get out. Get the fuck out, and don’t come back. I mean it. You’re no longer welcome here.”
She seemed truly surprised. “We have an alliance.”
“We don’t have shit now.” Roland leaned in, his big frame rigid and strained. Lyssa smelled whiskey on his breath and noted his rumpled, slept-in, clothes. “You manipulated me and people I care about.”
He stabbed his finger at Eddie. “This boy is like my son. He is one of the finest people I know. That’s a line no one crosses. And if he vouches for Lyssa Andreanos. . then I don’t care if she has flying fucking monkeys coming out of her ass. You leave her alone.”
Lyssa raised her brow. Eddie stared at Roland with a look in his eyes that was heartbreakingly vulnerable.
Long Nu backed away. “You’ve made an odd decision today, Roland. Not entirely practical. Or wise.” She gave Lyssa a long hard look. “Your father was equally foolish.”
She started forward, but Eddie held her back. “Go to hell. He loved us.”
“Love is rarely enough,” replied the old dragon.
Without another word, she turned and walked down the corridor. The elevator opened for her, she stepped forward. . and in moments was gone.
Lyssa let out a shaky breath and collapsed into the nearest chair. Eddie sat beside her, with a wildness in his eyes that felt too familiar.
Roland bowed his head, rubbing his neck.
“Both of you,” he said gruffly. “Tell me everything.”
Eddie found Lyssa on the roof of the old building, watching the city come alive in light.
A fire burned in the copper pit, and her feet were propped up on a wooden bench. She held a bottle of water in her left hand, and her right — ungloved, exposed — hung loose off the arm of her chair.
The wind was sweet. Eddie took a moment, watching her, soaking in the miracle all over again.
I hope I never screw it up.
He ventured close. Lyssa did not turn around but she set down her water. “I smell pizza.”
“There’s an Italian restaurant downstairs. Roland has them on speed dial.” Eddie sat beside her, sliding a box across the small table between them. “Meat. A lot of it.”
Lyssa’s mouth quirked, but she looked away at the city. “This has been a strange couple days.”
He stared at his hands. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Estefan.”
She sighed. “If you had. . I would have run like hell. I wasn’t ready to hear that news. You were right.”
“Still,” he said. “It bothered me, keeping that from you.”<
br />
“I called his wife.” Lyssa glanced at him, and tears glittered in her eyes. “Josie was glad to hear from me, I think. But she didn’t know who killed her husband.”
“Did you tell her?”
“I told her. . I took care of it. That it was a shape-shifter thing. And she believed me.” She rubbed her eyes “I don’t want to be a good liar about things like that.”
Eddie stared at the city, then the burning fire. Without quite realizing what he was doing, he found himself reaching out — sticking his hand into the flames.
He felt nothing. Just a tickle. Movement of air over his skin.
“What Long Nu said,” he murmured, “about children.”
Lyssa tensed. “I want them. I didn’t before. . but I do now.”
She sounded defensive, but Eddie breathed a sigh of relief. “I do, too.”
“With me?”
“Of course. Who else?”
She smiled, but it was tremulous. “You looked at me as if I were an idiot for asking. I like that.”
“Good.”
“But I had to ask. This has all been so fast. We didn’t. . talk about that.”
“No, we didn’t. Like I told you, though. . I like surprises.”
“I like you,” she said, and all that good heat spread through him like the sun was blooming in his bones.
Eddie pulled his hand from the fire and reached for her. Lyssa met him halfway, and he could see in her eyes the weight of the day bearing down on her. This was his home, not hers. She had been wrenched across the country, away from what she was used to — forced to deal with people she hated, people who were grieving — just as she was grieving.
He hauled her into his lap, holding her tight in his arms. The sky was darker, the city brighter. Her hair smelled like woodsmoke and something sweetly indefinable. . maybe his shampoo.
She buried her face in his neck, and her body slowly began to relax. His did, too, and after a short, very comfortable, time. . he began to drift off.
Until his cell phone rang.
Lyssa flinched. Eddie briefly considered not answering until he looked at the screen.
“Mom,” he answered.
“Matthew Swint,” she said, and dread splashed him cold. “He was here.”
“I’m coming,” he said.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Eddie’s mother was a short, slender woman with an elfin face and long dark hair streaked with silver. She wore jeans and a white blouse with chunky turquoise jewelry — but the bright clean colors only seemed to enhance the sadness in her eyes.
Especially, thought Eddie, when she looked at him.
She met them at the door and seemed only a little surprised to find that he had brought someone with him. Lyssa was calm and polite, and her smile was warm. But she walked to the windows as Eddie spoke to his mother, and he knew her good eyes were scanning the shadows outside the house for any unwelcome observers.
Roland still had some clothes that had belonged to an old girlfriend, a woman Eddie knew well. Soria was shorter than Lyssa, but her style was the same: long-sleeved flowing blouses and equally long skirts. A silken scarf embroidered with turquoise beads covered her throat, but she’d kept the cream-colored knit gloves Serena had given her in New York. It didn’t look all that odd, put together.
“Where is he?” asked Eddie.
“I don’t know,” said his mother, rubbing a shaking hand through her hair. “I happened to look out the kitchen window, and he was in the backyard, staring at the house. I called you as soon as it happened.”
Fear and loathing touched her eyes. “He was thinner, and his skin sagged. He looked. . sick.”
Eddie felt sick. “We’ll find him.”
“No, you stay away from him.”
“I can’t. You know I can’t.”
“You have to.” His mother’s voice broke. “Edward—”
“No.”
“I can’t lose you.”
“You should have thought—” Eddie stopped, but too late. His mother stared at him, no doubt hearing the rest of that sentence in her head.
You should have thought of that.
All the color drained from her face. He looked away, shame rolling off him like a bitter cloud.
“Mom,” he said, softly. “Keep the doors locked. Call Grandma and tell her to do the same.”
She didn’t say a word.
Outside, Eddie strode down the front walk, past the rental car, and down the street. His hands were in his hair, partially covering his face. Every inch of him was strained and rigid.
Lyssa followed, allowing him his silence — until even he couldn’t take it anymore.
“I hate him,” Eddie snapped. “Come on. There’s a park nearby.”
A small park, filled with trees and a several wide paths. It was empty except for two joggers in black pants and sweatshirts who ran past them with a large golden retriever. The dog shied from Lyssa with a whimper.
They found a bench and sat down. It all seemed too normal, far away from the disgusting horror of the previous night.
But not sufficiently far away from the horror of his childhood, years and years in the past.
“I’ll never be able to talk with her about this,” he said. “It’ll kill her. It might kill me.”
Lyssa leaned against him. “Some things can’t be talked about. Anyone who says differently has never lived through a truly horrible event.”
“And saying the words doesn’t heal anything unless you’re saying them to the right person, at the right time.” Eddie bowed his head, kneading his brow. “You were the right person, the right time. My mom. . isn’t.”
“If you told her that you forgive her—”
“I don’t,” he interrupted, then softened his voice. “One day, maybe. Not yet.”
“Then wait,” Lyssa said gently. “Wait until you’re ready. If you force it. . she’ll know you’re lying. And you’ll resent her for making you feel as though you have to say something you don’t mean.”
Eddie drew in a shaky breath. “Maybe you should be a therapist instead of an artist.”
“The artist is a therapist.” Her lips brushed his cheek with great tenderness. “But I’m better at dishing out advice than taking it.”
He took her hand and kissed it. “I want to introduce you a little better to my mom. Do you feel comfortable going back there?”
“Do you?”
When he hesitated, she said, “Let’s wait.”
“You must think I’m a coward.”
“No.” Lyssa rested her cheek on his shoulder. “When you returned home for the first time. . what was it like?”
“Horrible,” he whispered. “She was so happy to see me. . but she was angry, too, that I’d run away. Angry and hurt. She needed me after my sister died, and I abandoned her. I had a good reason — good, from my point of view — but she didn’t know any of that, and maybe it didn’t matter. Maybe I should have just stayed and fought it out — the fire, the guilt. All of it.”
“Early on, did you have trouble controlling the fire?”
“Yeah. It would just. . come on me. I spent a lot of time alone. I’m surprised I didn’t die from starvation or loneliness in those first few years.”
“I almost did,” she said. “And I’m surprised I didn’t accidentally murder anyone. I was a girl, alone. Men would. . men would try to take advantage of that. I’d fight them off, or they would see my right hand and freak. Or maybe they’d catch fire, and I would run like hell.”
He held her tightly against him. “I’m sorry.”
“Did that happen to you? You know. . with men who liked boys?”
“Yes.” Eddie closed his eyes, burying his nose in her hair. “I fought like you did, but it made me think of Matthew, and that was. . one more horrible thing.”
“He didn’t molest you, did he?”
“Not like that, but. .”
“You don’t have to talk about it,” she said quickly.
> “No, it’s. . he would look at me. Me, naked. And. . say things.”
Lyssa gripped his hand so tightly it hurt. But he welcomed the pain.
“That’s all,” he whispered. “You want to walk now?”
“Yes,” she said.
Eddie was going to drive them back to his apartment, but he could tell that Lyssa was still thinking about what he’d told her — and that wasn’t the memory he wanted to end her night on.
So he took her to the Kosmo Klub.
Built underground, the bar was accessible via a narrow stairwell so nondescript and unadorned, the only way to know it existed was by the long line of people waiting to get in.
Fortunately, it was the favorite haunt of Dirk & Steele’s agents — and the owner, an endearingly eccentric elderly woman named Dame Rose — loved all those men and women. Like, she really loved them.
Eddie walked Lyssa to the front of the line, and she gave all the waiting people an uncertain look. He slipped a protective arm around her waist, aware of the women glaring — and the men checking out her flawless face.
“You sure about this?” she asked, checking her scarf.
“You’ll love it. Only the best musicians come here, and the food is great.”
“Mmm,” she said, peering at the diminutive, old-fashioned sign nailed above the entrance.
“Kosmo Klub,” she read out loud, and smiled. “For a kosmic good time.”
The bouncer recognized him, and was just beginning to unhook the velvet rope when a musical voice cried, “Eddie!”
An elderly woman hobbled up the stairwell, face lit up in a broad smile. She was dressed in emerald green sequins, with a matching feather in her silver hair. Her skin was very dark and fine, her bones delicate as a bird’s. But when she hugged Eddie, her fingers pinched his ass with unerring precision, and she pulled his face down for a hearty kiss on the mouth.
“Lord, you make me lusty,” she announced loudly, and turned her sparkling gaze on Lyssa. “And who is this lovely? Don’t tell me you finally have a girl?”
Lyssa grinned, and held out her gloved left hand. “My name is Lyssa.”
Within the Flames d&s-11 Page 30