“Maryann, come on let’s get you in another dress,” said Aunt Bess.
I stared at her.
“I told you that I’m not going back.”
“Yes, you are.” said Aunt Bess.
I should have laughed that she insisted I go back to the dance with Rick.
“Do you want that girl to win?” she demanded hands on her hips. “She will if you don’t return and rub her face in it.”
She went to the closet, looked through my dresses and pulled out a blue flowered print.
“Here try this one on.”
“It doesn’t fit.” My mother bought the dress. I’d only worn it once and it never felt comfortable or looked right on me.
“I’ll be right back. I think I have a dress that’ll work.”
I felt too emotionally drained to fight any more. Staring at the blue heap on the floor I felt tired and defeated. Let me just crawl into bed and have a good cry.
Aunt Bess came in holding a blue-gray dress in a similar A-line cut to the dress on the floor.
“Where did you get this?” I asked taking the hanger from her.
“I wore it to a dance with your Uncle Jacob. He called it my stormy blue dress. Said it was the color of my eyes when I got mad.” She laughed. “I think it’ll look real pretty on you.” Her eyes softened,
A faint hint of lavender enveloped me as she put the dress over my head.
I looked in the mirror. “It fits,” I whispered.
“Of course it fits,” replied my aunt matter of factly. She fussed with the neckline and sleeves, and then stepped back. “You look real pretty,” she declared.
Our eyes met in the mirror. She leaned over and hugged me.
“Thank you, Aunt Bess.”
I blew my nose and rubbed a tissue across my eyes.
“Now, let’s get you back to that dance.”
In the living room Rick jumped to his feet from the sofa.
“You look great,” he said. “In fact, I think I like this dress even more.”
“You look real nice,” agreed Russ.
Rick held out my coat. “Come on, Maryann. Let’s get back to the dance.”
“Now you drive real careful,” my aunt cautioned as we headed toward the door.
“Yes ma’am,” replied Rick, taking my arm.
Russ and Aunt Bess walked us outside to the truck. Rick held the door and I got in. As we pulled out, I looked back. Russ had his arm around my aunt. I had no time to think about that because Rick reached for my hand.
How could things change so quickly I wondered? How could I feel so terrible one moment, then so happy the next?
“I’m glad we’re going back,” said Rick after we got into the truck and back on the road,
“Me too,” I admitted. He held my hand until we were at school.
We walked in just as they were drawing the winner of the raffle.
“And the winner is…” the band played a drum roll for effect.
“Lisa Barrows!”
Everyone cheered as Lisa went up to claim her prize, a $50 gift certificate to Sam’s Mercantile.
She waved and said, “Thank you!” into the microphone. More cheers erupted.
The band started a slow number and Rick took me in his arms. We let the music wash over us.
“I’m glad I came back,” I whispered in his ear.
Rick held me tighter. “Me, too.”
After the music ended, the announcer came on. “Get your ballots into the boxes. We’re gonna crown the Dance King and Queen real soon.
Another lively number started and Billy Gray grabbed my hand. Partner after partner spun me around the floor. I danced and danced until I thought my sides would split.
“This is the last dance,” they announced. “Grab your partner.”
The band played Patsy Cline’s Crazy and Rick pulled me into his arms. I wanted the music to go on forever. Then, the music stopped.
“And now the news you’ve all been waitin’ for,” said the principal. “The Dance King and Queen.”
Pauline and her date stood in front, confident they’d announce her as the winner.
Another drum roll…Lights dimmed…
“The Dance King and Queen are…” The drum roll continued then stopped. The silence was unbearable.
Who was it? I wondered.
“Rick Ferguson and Maryann Madigan.”
Everyone went wild. Rick hugged me. I hugged Rick. He took my hand and pulled me up on stage amid clapping, cheering and stamping feet.
“The Dance King,” announced the principal, putting Rick’s crown on. Then turned and picked up mine. He hesitated before putting it on my head.
“I just want to say I admire this young lady’s perseverance. I heard there was an ‘unkind incident’ earlier which necessitated in a change of clothing.” He glared down at Pauline. Then he placed the crown on my head and the school photographer snapped a picture of the two of us.
By that time it seemed like Rick and I been congratulated by the entire school. When we were finally ready to leave, Pauline and her date had disappeared.
Lisa ran up and grabbed my hands.
“Congratulations Dance Queen,” she said.
“I can’t believe it,” I said still dizzy from the crowning and all the congratulations. It all happened so fast.
“Well let’s just say that a lot of votes were cast after you left to change. Pauline isn’t as well liked as she thought.”
“Oh Lisa!” I hugged my friend knowing she was responsible for me being at the dance and for so much more.
“I’m glad you’re staying over,” she said. “We are going to have such fun tonight.”
How grateful I was that Aunt Bess insisted I come back to the dance.
How did she know how important it would be?
Chapter 20
May 1961
After the dance, everything seemed different at school. It wasn’t just that Rick and I were elected Dance King and Queen, somehow the balance of power shifted. Pauline fell off her throne. People I barely knew said hello as they passed me in the hall and more than one girl told me how proud she was that I put Pauline in her place.
Meanwhile, Pauline seemed to go out of her way to avoid me. Lisa giggled every time we saw her scurrying out of the way when I walked down the hall. Willing to let bygones be bygones, I couldn’t get close enough to tell Pauline that. Eventually, my celebrity status wore off and things at school returned to normal.
I missed riding home from school with Rick. Although we talked to each other in school, it wasn’t the same. Unable to do anything about it, I tried to let it go. Every time I got on the school bus, I saw Rick get in his truck and leave without me. And it hurt. It seemed that nothing short of a miracle would change Aunt Bess’ opinion about the Fergusons.
At the ranch I rode Freeman almost every day. He became a different horse now, more confident and mine grew right along with him.
Now that Shadow Dancer had recovered, I began working him on a lunge line.
“This is the beginning of getting him broken,” explained Russ.
“It is? How?” I asked, not understanding.
“You lay the ground work. Kinda like kindergarten,” said Russ. “He gets used to being handled, to listening to what you’re asking him to do and obeying you. If you do it right, it isn’t a test of wills with a young horse. It’s a natural progression to getting a saddle on his back — and then a rider.”
Russ showed me how to handle the 30-foot line. At first the lunge line felt like a big unwieldy ball of yarn and I had trouble keeping the line from getting tangled up. I made Shadow go around me in a circle at various gaits. He had to be worked in both directions to limber up. We went from a walk to a trot and then a lope. It took a lot of practice for me to get it right. Eventually, Shadow Dancer obediently went through his paces and I became more coordinated handling the lunge line. I looked forward to the day I could ride him.
Ranch work continued. There
were still stalls to clean, horses to groom and ride. As my skill grew, I got things done faster and, therefore, did more. Russ was a patient teacher and took time to answer my endless questions. He looked out for me and usually worked close by.
Although I missed getting a ride home with Rick, spending time with Shadow Dancer gave me something to enjoy. The horse and I had gotten closer since I doctored his leg twice a day. Now, he nickered every time he saw me. Of course he expected treats and often got them. It was something more. We shared a special bond. Even Russ remarked how gentle Shadow was with me and how well behaved he had become.
Thursday, June 1, 1961
A couple of weeks after the dance, I got the courage to speak up at breakfast, one morning.
“Aunt Bess, would it be all right if I get a ride home from school with Rick? I mean you’ve met him when he brought me here to change my dress.” I plunged on. “And he’s a safe driver and….”
Her eyes flashed. “I can’t believe you’d even ask that knowing how I feel about the Fergusons.”
“I think you should let her,” said Russ in a soft voice.
My aunt turned on him. “She’s my niece, not yours,” she snapped. “This is my decision.”
“Well, I think you’re making a bad one,” he said standing up. He sounded annoyed. “Excuse me. Got work to do.” He walked out the door without another word. The door slammed behind him and I jumped at the sound.
“Well that’s enough of that,” my aunt huffed.
I carried my dishes to the sink. “I’ve got to get ready for school,” I said, glad to leave.
“See you later,” she said and sat at the table drinking her morning coffee.
* * *
Things were no better at supper that night,
“Where’s Russ?” I asked sitting down at the table with only two place settings.
“He’s eating in the bunkhouse,” she explained as if there wasn’t unusual about that. I couldn’t remember having a meal without him.
Conversation dragged. I gave up after pulling a few half-hearted comments from her. I could tell by the way she kept looking at the door she hoped Russ would change his mind. He didn’t, and we ate our apple pie without him.
After clearing the table, I began to start washing the dishes when Aunt Bess stopped me.
“Leave them, Maryann. I’ll do them later.” She sounded tired.
“Okay. I have homework to do,” I said, glad to escape.
Later, after I finished my studies and was getting ready for bed, I heard voices arguing downstairs. Opening the door, I listened.
“She’s my niece. I told you I’m doing what I think is best.”
“Well you’ve made that right clear,” said Russ in an angry voice. That was unusual. I’ll never seen him lose his temper.
“It’s been fifteen years, Bess. Don’t you think it’s time to forgive Doug?”
“I’ll never forgive him.” Her voice shook with anger.
“I don’t believe you, woman. And you call yourself a Christian? Maryann cares about the boy. He’s a nice kid and he taught her how to ride, for Pete’s sake. What harm could it be letting him give her a ride home from school?”
“No,” Aunt Bess replied.
“Doug was Jacob’s best friend,” said Russ in a soft voice. “It was an accident. You know that.”
“He killed my Jacob.” Her voice rose, full of indignation.
The silence continued. What was going on?
“Oh Bess, come here.”
“What am I going to do, Russ?” she asked in a voice thick with emotion. She sounded close to tears. That shocked me because I’d never seen my aunt cry.
“We’re gonna let Rick give Maryann a ride home from school, that’s what we’re gonna do,” said Russ firmly. “And the rest? We’ll figure it out together, one step at a time.”
More silence.
It was driving me crazy not being in the room to see what was going on.
“Now get some sleep, sweetheart. I’ll see you in the morning.”
The door opened.
“Russ?” There was a pause, then “Thanks.”
“Any time, darlin’.”
The door closed.
Sweetheart? Darling? Why did Russ use those endearments? Then I remembered his arm around her when Rick drove me back to the dance.
Instead of feeling happy, I felt scared. My world was tilting again like it had after my parents died. By the time I got into bed, I felt sick and dizzy.
Chapter 21
Friday, June 2, 1961
“We have something wonderful to tell you,” Aunt Bess said the next day after supper.
My stomach clenched. Whenever my parents said that, it had been something great for them and awful for me. Like the time my dad got a chance to work in France for two years. I had to live with Susan Lawrence because her mom was my mother’s best friend. Susan and I couldn’t stand one another. I hated staying with them.
Aunt Bess looked at Russ.
“Do you want to tell her?”
Russ looked at Aunt Bess.
“No, you tell her.”
“Tell me what?”
Russ moved until he stood with his arm around Aunt Bess.
“We’re getting married.”
“Married?” I looked at them is disbelief. “You’re kidding.”
My eyes went back and forth from Russ to my aunt. “How long has this been going on?”
Aunt Bess blushed.
“You owe your aunt an apology,” said Russ.
“For what? I can’t even get a ride home from school with Rick Ferguson, but you two can go ahead and get married.”
“It’s not the same thing and you know it,” snapped Aunt Bess.
“Not to me,” I said and left them.
I couldn’t breathe.
I wanted to throw something.
I wanted to scream.
I wanted to cry.
Instead, I sought out Shadow Dancer.
The familiar feel of the brush on his body soothed me as I groomed him. He kept turning his head around to look at me as I sniffled and wiped tears from my eyes. Somehow he sensed how upset I was.
“What’s eating you?” Russ asked behind me.
I continued grooming the horse, ignoring him.
“Leave me alone,” I muttered.
“Your aunt’s worried about you,” continued Russ.
“No, she’s not. She doesn’t give a hoot about me. All she cares about is you.”
I continued brushing, struggling to stop my tears. I felt so stupid. I sure didn’t see this coming.
My head pounded. I leaned against Shadow Dancer’s warm shoulder taking a deep breath and drinking in the wonderful horse smell of him.
“You wanna talk about it?”
“No.”
“What’s wrong, Maryann? It’s not that Bess and me are getting married, is it? Hell, I’ve been trying to get that woman to the altar for years. Beats me why she finally accepted.”
He waited. I didn’t answer.
“You know it helps to talk about what’s bothering ya.”
It used to be easy to talk to Russ. Now I felt tongue tied.
“Nothing is gonna change with me marrying your aunt. It’ll be just like before.”
I turned to Russ. “It won’t be the same. Don’t you see? It’s all changed now.”
I left the barn. Even Shadow Dancer couldn’t comfort me.
That weekend I noticed Aunt Bess had changed in subtle ways. She and Russ had a secret code between them. Sometimes it was a word, other times a glance — like shorthand. They spoke a foreign language that I couldn't understand. I felt exiled in a different country.
There was a new softness in my aunt, too. Russ touched her hand, gave her a quick kiss or put his arm around her. And she melted, turning like a sunflower toward the light. Only having eyes for each other, they barely noticed me.
“Don’t you like the idea of us getting hitched?” Aunt Bess a
sked me. “I thought you’d be pleased because you like Russ and all. We’ll be a family.”
Her voice caught with emotion. “I want you to be happy, Maryann.”
“It just takes some getting used to,” I said, unable to explain.
I’d lost my family when my parents died. Then I’d been transplanted to Wyoming. Aunt Bess had become my new family. Now marrying Russ meant that everything changed.
How would I fit in?
What if they just wanted to be alone with each other?
What happened if they decided to send me away to school?
My heart beat faster and I had trouble breathing. I felt nauseous at the thought of leaving the ranch. I was just getting used to living here.
“But nothing’s changed,” said my aunt, trying to convince me. “Everything will be just like is used to be.”
That’s just what she didn’t see.
For me, everything had changed.
Chapter 22
Monday, June 5, 1961
The minute Lisa saw my face at school on Monday morning she knew something was terribly wrong. Maybe it was my red eyes that clued her in. I cried on and off all weekend. Then today I dashed out without breakfast before my aunt could get a good look at my face. Thankfully, Russ wasn’t there because he noticed everything.
“Maryann, what happened?” Lisa pulled me over to the side of the hall.
“You won’t believe it.” My eyes filled with tears again.
“What? Tell me,” she demanded.
I shook my head as students passed us going to class.
“Come on. I know an empty classroom.” Lisa grabbed my wrist and dragged me down the hall. We ducked into a dark room. She shut the door, and left the lights off.
“Now what gives?” she asked.
“Oh Lisa, it’s awful. Aunt Bess is getting married.”
She looked as surprised as I’d been Friday night when they told me.
“Who’s she marrying?”
“Russ.”
“Oh boy.”
“Lisa, it’s awful. She’s going to send me away to boarding school so they can be alone together on the ranch.”
“Did she say that?”
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