The Muse: MMF Bisexual Romance

by A. Anders

  “But then you did what you did and I fucked Mars. How was I supposed to handle that? Were you telling me that you had no strong feelings for me and that we were just having fun? Didn’t that mean that I should stop thinking about you as something potentially serious? Didn’t that mean that I should focus on developing a relationship with Mars?”

  Cara stared at Brik as your heart broke a second time. “So, are you two together now?” She asked no longer seeing a place for her in either of her guys’ hearts.

  Brik looked at Cara no longer hiding his confusion. “I don’t know. I try, and then I fail. We have sex and while we’re doing it, it’s fantastic and it’s everything I’ve ever wanted. But as soon as it ends, it feels like there’s something missing.

  Always when it’s over, I think about you. I think about how much I miss you. Cara, I don’t think we’re complete without you.”

  Cara held her breath unable to swallow what he had just said. The tears rolled down Cara’s cheeks again, this time from love. “I missed you too. I missed you so much,” she admitted. “I thought about the both of you every day. I don’t want to be without you two. I’m not complete without you two either.”

  Brik, stripped of his resistance, sat on the bed next to Cara and through his arms around her. Squeezing her tightly, the hole that he had felt for so long within himself, began to fill. Brik was starting to realize that he loved Cara too. And, holding her, he never wanted to let her go. It was Cara who eventually pulled away.

  “What about Mars? He hasn’t called you back,” said with sudden realization.

  Brik thought about the mistake he had made leaving Mars naked on the floor. How could he have been so heartless? As the scene replayed in his head, he felt nauseous.

  “I think I might have screwed up,” Brik admitted feeling his heart ache.

  “What happened?”

  “I ran,” Brik explained not needing to say more.

  “Maybe you should call him again,” Cara suggested getting concerned.

  “Yeah, I should do that.”

  Brik retrieved his phone and punched in the number. It rang but no one answered. Staring down at the phone, Brik wondered what he should do. Did he just give Mars time? Did he call him back and tell him how he felt and that Cara was here?

  None of that seemed enough. He had genuinely done something wrong. Mars had always presented himself as unemotional and hardened. But the thing that made Brik fall in love with Mars immediately were the flashes of vulnerability in his eyes. Mars was a man who felt deeply.

  What the hell had he done? Brik asked himself. He had treated the man he loved horribly and had left him naked on the ground like trash. He needed to do more than just call Mars, Brik needed to see him.

  “We have to go,” Brik told Cara.

  “Where?”

  “To Mars’ place. I need to talk to him. I did something wrong,” Brik admitted with a heavy heart.

  “If we’re going to see Mars, then I need to change first,” Cara said.

  “Change? You look fine,” Brik said frustrated that she would focus on something so trivial. When he saw her change, though, he understood. She slipped off her professional looking blouse and put on the pink, purple, and blue plaid flannel shirt that Mars had sent her.

  “You look good in that,” Brik realized with a smile.

  Cara hugged herself rubbing her hands on the soft cotton. She felt like she was being held by Mars. It made her feel strong. It made her feel prepared for anything that might happen next.

  The two left the room for the elevator and traveled down to the garage. Leading Cara to his Maserati, Brik opened the door for her, closed it, and then slid into the cars leather bucket seats. The car started with a roar and in moments it was zigzagging the streets.

  “There,” Brik said pointing to Mars’ studio in the distance.

  “The lights are on,” Cara pointed out.

  “Maybe he’s there,” Brik suggested with an inescapable sinking feeling in his heart.

  Brik pulled into the driveway finding it empty. “His car isn’t here,” he said looking around.

  “Couldn’t he still be inside? The lights are on.”

  Now truly concerned, Brik got out of the car without a word. With Cara following him, he rounded the building to the front door. Brik pulled the handle expecting it to be locked. It wasn’t. When the door flung open, he looked at Cara.

  “This is bad, isn’t it?” Cara asked him.

  Brik didn’t answer. Racing in, he searched the lobby before heading to the studio. “Mars?” He called out hearing only his echo.

  As soon as Brik entered the studio and looked around, he stopped. The place was a mess. The fallen mannequins still wore their company’s clothing and a few of them were absorbing the liquid that, along with broken glass, littered the floor.

  Having a feeling, Brik found a shard that held the label. Picking it up, his feeling was confirmed. This was the bottle of champagne that he had brought for the two of them to celebrate with. Mars had clearly thrown it against the wall destroying it.

  “He’s upset,” Brik told Cara understating the situation.

  “Are those the rest of the clothes from your line?” Cara asked heading towards the mannequins.

  “Yeah. That’s them.”

  Cara stood each of them up examining them as she did. “They’re really cool. Wow, they’re really awesome.”

  “Yeah. Each has colors from particular pride flags,” Brik said briefly distracted by the pride he felt in what they had created.

  “Pride flags?”

  “Yeah. You know how there is a gay flag?”

  “You mean the rainbow flag?” Cara asked.

  “Yeah. Well, there’s also a bisexual flag, a sexually fluid flag, a queer flag and an asexual flag. It was Mars’ idea to make plaid patterns using each of the flags’ colors. That way people who identified as bisexual or asexual or queer, could wear something that speaks to who they are,” Brik explained.

  “That’s brilliant,” Cara said incredibly impressed. “How did he think of that?”

  “That was the idea he had after the three of us were together. The reason why he needed to get back to Los Angeles so quickly was that he needed to work with his loom to create the cloth.”

  “He loomed the cloth?” Cara asked shocked.

  “Just to design the first samples. He says he likes to work hands-on and have something he can hold.” Brik pointed at the mannequins. “These were created by our manufacturer. I think the one you’re wearing was created on his loom.”

  Cara hugged herself again comforted by the soft material. “Where do you think he’s gone?”

  “I don’t know. But it’s not good that the door was open. I’m going to try calling him again.”

  As Brik held the phone to his ear, a song played within the room. Brik recognized it. It was ‘I’m bringing sexy back’ by Justin Timberlake. It was one of Mars’ favorite songs. That was the reason why he had hired Justin Timberlake to sing on the yacht. He knew just how much Mars would appreciate it.

  Spreading out and searching the room for the source of the song, Cara found it. “It’s a phone,” Cara said holding it up. “It looks like you’re calling,” she added reading Brik’s name on the caller ID.

  “Shit,” Brik said hanging up.

  “What’s the matter?”

  “This isn’t good. None of this is good. I’m very worried,” Brik finally admitted to Cara.

  “Where do you think he’s gone?” Cara asked sharing Brik’s concern.

  “I don’t know. He could be anywhere. I’ve screwed this up,” Brik said collapsing into a chair.

  “Do you think this is serious? I mean, do you think he might do something stupid?” Cara asked feeling her chest thump.

  “He didn’t take his phone. The place is wrecked. And our last interaction was not a good one. I think he might do something crazy. He acts like he doesn’t care about anything, but that’s not true. I think I hu
rt him badly.”

  Cara moved to Brik and wrapped her arms around his chest and chair. “We’ll find him. I promise you he’ll be okay.”

  “How? He could be anywhere.”

  Cara thought as she scanned the room. “Where do his parents live? Do you know?”

  “His parents? Why do you ask?”

  Cara let go of Brik and moved in front of him. “When we were back in the Bahamas, he told me how he would sometimes go to his parent’s place and sit in front of it. I asked him why he didn’t go in and he just shrugged. I thought it was weird but I just wrote it off as him being eccentric.”

  “Are you thinking that he went to sit in front of his parents’ place?” Brik asked confused.

  “Maybe. He made it sound like that was where he went to think about stuff. Maybe he went there to think. Do you know where his parents live?”

  Brik thought for a moment. “I remember him saying that he grew up in Palmdale.”

  “Yeah. He told me that to. Where is that?”

  “About three hours north,” Brik explained.

  “How big is it? Do you think we would be able to find him if he was there?”

  “I don’t know. But I don’t think we have another choice. We can’t just sit here and wait for him to come back. We have to go and try and find him,” Brik decided.

  Agreeing that they had no other choice, Cara pocketed Mars’ phone and did what she could to secure the studio. They had no way of locking it, so they left it open. What else could they do?

  Getting back into Brik’s car, they set the GPS to Palmdale and drove. They were scheduled to arrive at 1 AM. In the meantime, they traveled in silence. Brik had so much that he wanted to share with Cara, but, with everything that had happened, he wondered if this was the right time.

  Eventually, weighed down by guilt and regret, Brik broke his silence.

  “I remember the first time I met Mars. I thought that he had to be the hottest guy I had ever seen.”

  Cara laughed.

  “Why’d you laugh?”

  “Because I thought exactly the same thing. I mean, you were a close second. But Mars?”

  It was Brik’s turn to laugh. “No, I get it. He really is unbelievably hot, isn’t he?”

  “Yes, he is,” Cara said with a smile.

  Brik again turned serious. “I don’t know what I’ll do if something happens to him.”

  Cara looked over at Brik. Seeing his concern, she put her hand on his thigh. “You love him a lot, don’t you?”

  “He is the first man I have ever loved,” Brik admitted. “Do you know what drives me crazy about him? He’s incredibly smart. His mind works in ways that I could barely understand. Sometimes he says stuff and I think, where the hell did that come from? And, he acts all tough, but sometimes she can be so tender.”

  Cara squeezed Brik’s thigh comforting him. “We’ll find him. He’s gonna be all right. I promise.”

  Their three hour trip became three and a half as they navigated the traffic through Hollywood. As they did, Brik sat thinking about his time with Mars. Early on as they put together their idea for the clothing company, there had been a lot of laughing and a lot of drinks. Everything was good until Mars made his first attempt at a design and Brik didn’t like it. Things slowly changed after that.

  Brik hoped their trip to the Bahamas would, if nothing else, rekindle the chemistry they had had together. It seemed to do the opposite. And when Brik first saw Mars talking to Cara, he was more jealous than he had ever been in his life. Though it didn’t take Brik long to understand how great Cara was, Brik hated knowing that the easy chemistry Mars once had with him, he now had with Cara.

  But for the sake of their company and Mars’ mental health, he knew that Mars needed Cara around him. Brik was willing to give up any chance that he had with Mars if it meant that he would be able to help Mars regain himself. But, Mars never truly came back to him. Or, maybe in truth it was that Brik had never fully let Mars in. Brik wasn’t sure which.

  “We’re here,” Brik said as the city’s lights appeared in the distance. They were still a mile out of town but they were getting close.

  “So, where do we go now?” Cara asked scanning the darkness.

  “I don’t know. But one thing I do know is that we need to stop for gas,” he said looking at the dashboard.

  Taking the first turnoff, Brik found the closest gas station and stopped. Sticking the pump nozzle into his tank, he set it to fill.

  “Do you want anything from inside?” Brik asked Cara.

  “I didn’t eat dinner. Maybe a bag of chips or something.”

  Brik headed into the gas station shop and scanned the aisles for something to eat. He collected a few bags of chips and a muffin. None of it looked very good but it was better than nothing.

  “Is this everything,” the cashier asked Brik.

  “That’s it…,” Brik looked at the man’s name tag, “Maxwell.”

  Maxwell rung up the purchases and placed them in a bag. As he did, Brik watched him wondering if he could be of further assistance. “So, Maxwell, are you from here?”

  “Born and raised,” Maxwell said handing Brik the bag.

  Brik stared at him again. Maxwell had a tired, weathered look to him, but underneath that, he looked like he could be Mars’ age. How many schools could there be in Palmdale? There couldn’t be that many.

  “Since you’re from here, perhaps you could help me find someone.”

  “Yeah? Who’s that?” Maxwell said dryly.

  “His name is Mars Templer. Actually, who I’m really looking for are his parents. Templer can’t be that common of a name here, could it?”

  Maxwell froze. For an instant, he looked like he had seen a ghost. Quickly, however, the look was gone. “Why are you looking for them?”

  “Do you know them?” Brik asked with a glimmer of hope.

  “It’s a small town. Templer isn’t that common of a name. What, he owes you money or something?”

  “No. To be honest, me and my friend in the car, we’re worried about him.”

  “Worried? Why?” Maxwell asked very interested.

  Brik considered how much he would tell the stranger. Brik decided he would never see this man again, so, why not be honest.

  “Because I love him and I think I hurt him really badly. I guess that would sound strange, you growing up in a small town and all. But, you asked, and that’s the truth. Now, the only place my friend and I can think that he might be is at his parents’ place. Is there any chance you might know where that is?”

  To Brik’s utter surprise, Maxwell’s face twisted nearly to the point of crying. “No, that’s not so strange to hear. It’s a small town, but we aren’t all backwards here. Yeah, I knew Mars.”

  Brik was suddenly washed with hope. “Really? Would you know where his parents live?”

  “Yeah, if they live in the same place. They used to live on Malbec Road. If you take the road east, you’ll pass an old dirt track. Go a mile past that, take a right, and the Templers live in a small blue and white house across from a set of shops.”

  “Oh my God! You’re amazing! I can’t believe my luck.” Brik reached back into his wallet and pulled out a fifty dollar Bill. He pushed it across the counter to Maxwell. “Thank you!”

  Maxwell looked at the note. “What’s this for?”

  “It’s for helping me.”

  “I don’t want your money. Just, find your friend. Patch things up with him.”

  Brik looked at him strangely. “Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure,” Maxwell told him unwaveringly.

  Brik reached back over and retrieved the bill. “Okay. And, listen, thanks a lot. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this.”

  “Yeah,” the cashier mumbled not giving Brik any more of his time.

  Having collected his stuff, Brik exited the shop and headed for the car. Dumping the food in through the window, he removed the gas pump from the tank and got into his car.
/>   “Apparently, Palmdale is smaller than we thought. The cashier knew who Mars was,” Brik said with amazement.

  “Oh my God, he did?”

  Brik followed Cara’s gaze back towards the shop. The man was staring through the window back at them.

  “Yeah. He even knew where his parents lived. How lucky was that?”

  “Where do they live?” Cara asked excited.

  “They’re not too far from here. It sounded like a ten minute drive.”

  Cara sat silently for a moment. “What are we gonna say to Mars if he’s actually there?” She asked turning to Brik.

  Brik’s jaw tensed as he turned his attention towards the road and pulled off. Brik knew what he should say to Mars, but was he going to say it?

  Chapter 12

  Mars

  Mars sat in his car staring across the street at the home he had grown up in. He had had enough. The rejection, the feeling of being unloved, he couldn’t take anymore. If only something had been different. Mars wasn’t sure what, but he had a feeling that the root of his lonely life began across the street from where he now sat.

  Mars had been sitting there staring for hours before his father’s car arrived and his father stumbled out. It had been over fifteen years since Mars had seen him and the first thing Mars saw his father do was stagger up the two porch steps and fail to get his key in the lock. He was drunk. But succeeding on his fifth attempt to unlock the door, his father opened the front door and disappeared within.

  For a long time after that, everything in the house had been quiet. There had been some door slamming, but more than an hour had passed since there was any commotion. The house had been dark for more than forty-five minutes when Mars finally turned his attention away from his childhood home and back towards his crumbling life.

  Feeling bitterly alone as the darkness of the night consumed him, Mars was about to start his car and drive into oblivion when he stopped. As he had reached for the ignition, a light had turned on in his old living room. Through the window, he could see his mother. She was agitated and in angry pursuit was his father.