by Elle Rease
“I’ve scaled back a bit and got involved with my dad’s business,” he responded. “I think it’s about time I pull up my socks.”
“But you like tattooing people.”
He shrugged. “I like taking care of you, by whatever means necessary.”
“Bren, is there something you’re not telling me?”
“Look, healthcare wouldn’t cover all of the expenses for your operation, but that’s not why I’m doing this. I just haven’t taken anything seriously for years. Since you’ve been back, I’ve spoken to my dad about getting trained up in his business and after… what’s happened, I finally started pulling my weight around.”
“I’m just worried you’ll forget that I don’t want a white-collared prick.”
He burst out laughing and glanced at her. “Apart from the wedding, you’re never getting me in a suit and tie.”
“Okay, good,” she said. “Has the wedding been postponed?”
“No, we’ve kept all the arrangements as they are.”
“But Bren, I won’t be healed up in time for the honeymoon.”
“Cinnia, if you think I’m marrying you for the sex, then you don’t know me very well.”
“What happened to the guy who wanted to fuck me whenever he felt like it?”
He was quiet for a while, focusing on the road. His hair was loose and, coupled with his beard, covered his facial expressions. She had no idea what he could be thinking.
“He’s had a bit of a wake-up call,” he answered softly.
A sliver of apprehension slipped through her weak emotional defenses. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“I’m not saying we won’t be sexually active anymore, Cin. I’m just willing to wait until you’re ready.”
“And until then? Who are you screwing?”
“Jesus Christ, Cinnia.” His gaze was fierce. “How can you even ask me that? I will never cheat on you again. Does my word mean nothing anymore?”
She closed her eyes and sighed deeply. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“I need to know you understand what being with me means. Neither one of us will ever be with anyone else, until death do us part.”
The one corner of her mouth pulled up. “Maybe even after that.”
“Aye.” He let out a frustrated breath. “I know you’re going through a tough time, Cin. I just want you to keep talking to me about whatever’s bothering you. Don’t let your thoughts fester into resentment, whether that’s against me or someone else. Talk to me, all the time. Okay?”
Her psychologist had given her similar instructions. “Okay.”
“For what it’s worth, I want you even more now that I’ve almost lost you. Nothing will ever change that.”
She nodded and turned away, gazing out the window while she tried to get her emotions under control. She’d needed the reassurance, but she hated herself for it. She had been so secure in Brennan’s love for her a few weeks ago and it sucked that one event made her question it. He deserved better.
“You’re doing the opposite of talking to me,” he informed her dryly.
“Sorry, I’m just thinking.”
“What about?”
“How I don’t have much self-confidence anymore. It’s stupid that I’m taking it out on you.”
“Cin, I’ve got broad shoulders. I can take it.” He reached over and gave her knee a squeeze as he turned into their street. “And you’ve got nothing to feel self-conscious about. You’re awesome.” He leered at her lasciviously. “Besides, I don’t care if you’re voluptuous or skinny. You always make me hard.”
She blushed from her head to her toes, glad that he’s put that argument to rest. “I don’t like that you’ve lost weight.”
“I haven’t had time for gym, is all.” He parked the car and got out, striding to her side to help her again. “I’ll get back into it soon.” He shut the door and caged her in against the car. “Before we go in, I want to show you something.”
Her heartbeat became erratic as he pulled his shirt over his head. His close proximity was setting her blood on fire and she felt a little dizzy. She blinked in confusion at his chest, something about his tattoos seeming different.
With a start, she realized he’s finally added her name over his heart.
“Bren,” she sniffed, tracing the cursive letters with her finger. It blended so well with the rest of his pieces, looking like it belonged. It was already healed, so he must’ve had it done the day after her attack. “It’s beautiful.”
“So are ye, lass,” he mumbled. His head swooped down to kiss her, gently working his tongue inside to connect with hers.
At the moment of contact, her panties grew damp. She shivered as he raked his fingers through her hair and pressed his hips to hers. The feel of his hardening cock behind his leather had her weak at the knees. He hadn’t been lying: he did still want her.
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, gasping in pain when this made her ribs stretch in a way her physiotherapist had warned her against. “Ow!” she exclaimed, letting go of him.
“Shit, I’m sorry.” He turned away, raking his fingers through his hair. “I forgot myself.”
“Bren, please don’t say sorry.” She flinched as the last cramp subsided. “I wanted it.”
“That’s part of the problem, isn’t it?” With a sigh, he took her hand and smiled. “It’s hard for me to remember you’re hurt when you touch me like that.”
“Noted. I’ll do it again soon.”
He chuckled. “Come on, let’s get you comfortable.”
She was dazed as she stepped over the threshold. She headed for the living room, eager to sit down. Her limbs were tired already. “It’s good to be—”
“WELCOME HOME!”
She blinked at her closest friends and family, who were huddled in the living room. There were banners and streamers and balloons decorating the space. Her heart constricted at what lengths they’d gone to, to make this special. She should’ve known that they would.
“Cin!” Loraine rushed forward and hugged her daughter as if she was made of delicate china. “God, it’s so good to see you up and about!”
“I’m glad you’re here, mom.” Cinnia planted a kiss on Loraine’s cheek and greeted her father next. “Hey, dad.”
“We should stop this habit of being in hospital,” James said hoarsely. “It’s not good for my health.”
She giggled and patted his back. At least she wasn’t the only overly emotional person in the room. “I’ll do my best, dad.”
“Hey, sis,” Teagan said when their father released her. “It’s good to have you back.” He dropped a peck on her forehead and squeezed her good hand. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you, too.” Her eyes were filling with tears as Piper embraced her. “How are you, sis?”
“A million times better now that you’re home,” Piper whispered. “Can’t wait for your nose to heal completely.”
Cinnia laughed and touched the gauze on her nose. “Me neither.” She grinned once Mysie kissed her cheek and gave her a brief, yet loving, sideways hug. “You guys spoil me.”
“Lass, after everythin’ ye’ve been through, ye deserve nothin’ less,” Reade muttered. He stroked the back of his hand over the side of her face. “Ah’m so proud of the way ye handled them. Ye never back down first, and tha’s somethin’ tae be admired.”
“I guess I was raised by men who showed me how to be strong,” she teased.
“Aye, but now ye can put yer feet up while ye get yer strength back. Ah don’t want tae tell ye twice, ye hear?”
She nodded, her gaze already on Dawn, who had Aurora in her arms. Cinnia held her breath. “I’m glad you brought her.”
“We couldn’t find a babysitter on—”
“Dawn, relax,” Cinnia interjected. “I’m really glad you brought her. Just because I can’t…” She cleared her throat when her voice cracked. “I’m her godmother. I want
her around.”
“Cin,” Dawn said softly, tears rolling down her cheeks. She came forward and threw her unoccupied arm around Cinnia’s shoulders. “I love you so much. It might be completely selfish after everything you’ve been through, but I’d rather have you here than a horde of your babies.”
Cinnia couldn’t stop the waterworks anymore. She clung to Dawn as she sobbed her heart out, not caring that her ribs were hurting more with every hitched breath. She knew she meant the world to these people and she felt the same about them. It was also obvious that she had the right support system to help her through this time, and for the years of a childless home to come.
At the same time, her heart ached from her loss.
Aurora whined when Cinnia and Dawn’s hug became uncomfortable. Dawn stepped away with a short laugh, wiping her tears before doting on her daughter. “I would give her to you, but I know you’re not supposed to carry anything heavy.”
“She can’t be that heavy,” Cinnia argued. She burned with the need to hold a baby.
“She’s too heavy. So get better soon: she needs her godmother.”
Cinnia thanked Loraine for handing her a tissue. “Okay.” She accepted Haye’s kiss. He was the final member of this little party, yet she was exhausted. She shuffled over to the closest chair and leaned on Teagan’s proffered arm as she sat down. She looked around and frowned. “Where’s Bren?”
“He…” Mysie dabbed at her eyes with a soaked tissue. “He went to get you something to drink.”
Cinnia was confused as she glanced at the coffee table, which was adorned with confectionaries. “Really?”
“Look, lass, my boy’s tryin’ tae be strong for ye,” Reade replied, “but tha’ does nae mean he’s not broken over this.”
Her brain put the pieces together and she could kick herself for being so wrapped up in her own woes that she didn’t think of saving face. Brennan was probably hurt, seeing how messed up she was over Dawn’s statement.
She had to be more careful. She couldn’t let him feel guilt over something that wasn’t even his fault to begin with.
Brennan entered the room with a glass of water, his eyes suspiciously red-rimmed. He spotted her and brought it over, kneeling at her feet. “How are you feeling?” he asked, pressing his hand to her forehead as if to test her temperature.
“I’m just a little tired,” she admitted.
“That makes sense. I should probably bring your bag in so you can take your meds.”
He was out of sight before she could argue. She swallowed past the lump in her throat and, with a shaky hand, brought the glass to her lips. She had no idea how long everyone was planning on staying, but she suddenly felt like she was going to be shitty company, either way.
“Cin,” Mysie said, sitting down next to her. She took Cinnia’s healthy hand between both of hers. “I want you to walk me through what happened that night. I know you probably don’t want to talk about it, but I think it’ll do you good to get it off your chest as many times as you can.”
“Right now?”
“You won’t have to repeat the story as many times with everyone already here,” Mysie shrugged.
“I suppose.” She looked at her lap while she mentally went back to that night. “I just wanted some fresh air. It was so hot in the club, what with all the smoke and dancing. Piper came with me.” She made eye-contact with her brother’s girlfriend and smiled. “Someone upstairs must’ve been looking out for me.”
Piper’s eyes were watery and she cuddled into the crook of Teagan’s neck.
“We were busy talking when I heard a car close by. I should’ve gone inside then: I knew it wasn’t normal for cars to be at the back of the club, especially at that time of night. And then there were footsteps.” Cinnia stared off in the distance, becoming detached, as if everything had occurred to other people. “I recognized him immediately. He was with five other guys. They formed a circle around us in the blink of an eye. I tried to get Piper out of there but it was too late.”
Brennan had joined them as she shared the story. He pretended as if he wasn’t really paying attention, although she knew that he’s never heard her side and that his ears were pricked for new details. He was rummaging through her bag for her meds.
“I stalled for time, hoping that one of the guys would notice that we’ve been gone for too long, but someone was in on it and kept the guys busy inside, or so I was told.” She inhaled sharply, feeling that sense of dread all over again. “We were alone and outnumbered. He made comments and I didn’t shut up. Then they attacked and I tried to keep them off me, screaming for Piper to run. She was passed out on the ground.”
Her fiancé read every label and took out the prescribed amount of pills. He carried them to her, his gaze downcast.
“If there weren’t so many of them, I would’ve won. They didn’t know I could fight back. I’ve been trained to deal with those situations, but there were six. I couldn’t stop them.” She gagged, vividly recalling their taunts and how relentless they had been. “And he had brass knuckles on.”
Loraine gasped and threw her arms around her husband’s neck; Mysie’s eyes became hard and her jaw set, mimicking Reade’s expression; Piper burst into a fresh set of tears. Dawn shook her head in disbelief.
The men were all beyond pissed off.
“What a fucking coward,” Brennan said roughly. “He hid behind five men and knuckle dusters. He wouldn’t even get his hands dirty.”
“One hit and I was on the ground,” Cinnia went on monotonously. “I wanted to move out of the way, but he kept me there and kicked me. I felt weaker with every hit. I screamed for help. He hinted that he was going to rape me. I screamed louder, until it felt like I swallowed sand. I hit his face until my wrist broke.” She glanced at the cast. “He hit back, and then everything went dark. I heard Byron, but I thought it was wishful thinking. I’m glad it wasn’t.”
“As are all of us, lass,” Reade nodded. “He’s a good lad and he’s proven his worth.”
“Where is he, anyway?”
“He has school today. He’ll be here soon,” Mysie answered.
She held the first pill to her mouth and gulped it down. She had to do it slowly to avoid hurting her nose. “So, I hear the wedding’s still going ahead.”
“You two aren’t getting out of that,” Haye joked. “We’ve all put in leave at work. The show must go on.”
“Well, I’ll make for an interesting bride.” Cinnia winked at Piper. “And I’ve lost weight, so the dress won’t fit.”
Piper waved that comment away with a laugh. “Brennan will fatten you up by then, so I’m not worried.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I was never behind all the planning, anyway. You’ve all kept it together while I was otherwise occupied.”
They laughed and dug into some of the snacks on the coffee table. Cinnia did, in fact, feel as if a load’s been taken off her shoulders, yet she was glad that they could still be humorous around her. She knew Piper was shaken up and soothed herself with a single thought: this, too, shall pass.
Cinnia’s main concern was Brennan, though. Whenever he had visited her in hospital, he had made sure to keep the conversation from getting too dark. She’d been convinced that he was okay, especially because he had been able to even out the score with those bastards. It was unsettling to learn that he had the occasional breakdown.
The sound of a Harley parking outside broke her mental tension. “Is that Byron?” she asked, swallowing the last pill. Shit, she’ll have to eat soon, or she’ll pass out.
As if reading her mind, Brennan handed her a plate of small, healthy snacks. “Probably.” He sat down on the armrest and kissed her forehead. “I won’t be surprised if he cut class.”
“He can’t do that.”
“He’ll have to put in a couple of extra hours if that’s the case,” Brennan chuckled darkly.
Byron burst through the front door and zoned in on her. “Cin, I’m so glad you’re okay.�
�� She was happy he’d dropped the “ma’am” bullshit. “They wouldn’t let me see you at the hospital and the guys made sure that I always had work to do so I couldn’t sneak away—”
“It’s okay.” She smiled and patted his cheek. “Thank you for everything you’ve done, Byron. You’re a lifesaver.”
He shook his head. “I could’ve—”
“Byron, thank you.” Cinnia made sure that he was getting the picture, watching the stubborn set of his jaw with interest. “If you don’t accept my gratitude, I’ll drag you along to my shrink.”
He hesitated, exchanging a glance with Brennan. Then he pulled his shoulders back. “I want to do that, anyway. Between you, me and Piper, I don’t know which one of us is more fucked up.”
Cinnia laughed out loud. One of those infectious guffaws that brought tears of mirth to everyone’s eyes. Some clutched their stomachs and others’ shoulders shook as they cackled. She let it out until her stomach hurt and her ribs complained.
Anything was better than bawling her eyes out.
They didn’t stay much longer, mostly because Cinnia’s eyelids started drooping. She hated that her stamina was so weak, that she couldn’t even entertain her family for an hour. They greeted her at her chair and she watched Brennan see them out.
Byron remained behind to help Brennan clear out the dining room, so they could set up a bed there. She waited on the couch, hating that she couldn’t do anything for herself. She’s always been fiercely independent, and yet this situation was forcing her to allow other people to tend to her.
Once they were finished, Byron was hesitant to leave. She could tell that he’s lost faith in himself and that he thought bad things happened whenever he turned his back. She made a mental note to book a therapy session for him. Maybe that will help him deal with everything.
After Byron got on his bike and rode off, Brennan led the way to her new bedroom. They’d set up a television and CD-player, too, making this feel more and more like a glorified hospital.
“Are you going to be sleeping with me?” she asked, staring at the double bed. It wasn’t nearly as big as the one they frequently defiled.