“Marion, thank you so much. Do you mind if I join you now? I know you asked if I would like to help set up flowers and I would. I would also like to come over more and visit with you. I think it’s important that we keep our relationship going. Marc would have really liked that and I know I would really like that as well. I know that you were one of the most important people in his life and I would love to have the opportunity to get to know you better. I can drive you there if you would like. My mother, sister and best friend will be there waiting to meet you. You’re part of the family now.”
She got up and helped Marion to her walker. They both smiled at each other in joy. Cathy could feel that this was the start of something good. They needed each other to get through the pain and to remember Marc in the way that he was meant to be remembered. They both loved him and he had loved them both. Cathy only wished that she had gotten in contact with her sooner, but she was happy to get a relationship going with her now. It was the perfect start to a new life of joy and happiness.
* * *
Cathy’s eyes were soaked after hearing Marion’s eulogy to her beloved son. She didn’t see a dry eye in the house. It was so touching to see how dearly his mother had cared about him and loved him. Cathy hoped that one day when she was a mother, she would have a son and have a strong relationship with him like Marion did with Marc. Marion stepped down from the podium and motioned for Cathy to step up. Shocked, she didn’t know what to say or do. She didn’t have anything prepared and she wasn’t ready to speak to such a large group about someone she had cared so deeply about.
Pushing her fears aside, she got up and stood right in front of the podium. She nervously looked out at all of the guests whose eyes were glued on her. She gulped apprehensively and began. “Hello everyone, I’m Cathy Montanan. I just came up here to say that Marc was the love of my life. When I met him, he changed my life for the better. He made me see the type of person I was and strive to be even better. Not only was he the love of my life, but he was my best friend. It was hard even going a day without talking to him. We did everything together. I first met him in Professor Tyson’s class back when the semester first started. I knew he was an excellent student once he answered one of Professor Tyson’s trick questions. We were inseparable after that day. Whenever I was feeling down, he always made me feel better about myself. We connected over a bond of marine animals. I admired his passion for everything that he did. He never gave up on things, even when they were tough. He died doing something that he loved to do and longed to do for ages. He got back on his board and was strong in honor of his father. Marc was a hero and he died a hero. I will always love him and he will be in my thoughts and prayers until the day that I die. Thanks everyone for listening.”
As she walked down to her seat, everyone started clapping. She felt tears coming from her eyes, but she wasn’t ready to wipe them just yet. She wanted to feel her pain and grief at full force. After letting it all out, she would feel better. When she sat down, Chris took her right hand and held it softly.
“That was beautiful. You gave a great eulogy.” He whispered in her ear after the clapping had ended.
She nodded taking in the compliment while still grieving. A few of Marc’s friends gave speeches as well as the pastor. The funeral was over and Cathy felt signs of relief. She wouldn’t have to tell Marc goodbye any longer. Even though he had been gone nine long months, it felt as though he had just died yesterday. The room started to clear out and Chris went with Cathy’s mom to see the flowers that had been planted in front of the church in honor of Marc. Carly and Cathy were alone in the room once again with the casket.
“Shall we say goodbye?” Carly looked at her sister uncertainly.
“Yes, here we go again to the casket,” She said as she took Carly’s hand and they walked over to the casket together. When they were standing in front of it Cathy said, “Even though I know there’s no body in there, it still feels like there is. Isn’t that weird?”
“I think it’s because you miss him so much. Maybe it’s because you have finally accepted the fact that he is gone. Even though there’s no body, you know that he’s gone forever. It has been a long time since you last saw him.” She put her hand on top of the casket. She whispered, “Goodbye Marc, rest in peace.”
“It’s been easier to accept the fact that he’s departed as time has gone on, but I don’t feel like he’s completely gone. I think he lives on. Sometimes I still feel his spirit, as if he’s still here on earth with us. I loved him more than I loved any other man. I don’t know if I will ever find that kind of love again.” She sighed feeling guilty that she was even thinking of having another relationship in her lifetime, but at times she did feel lonely. Marc had been gone almost an entire year and he wasn’t coming back. She’d had time to grieve and she would have liked to think that he would have wanted her to move on. He would have wanted her to find happiness even if it wasn’t with him.
“He’s probably looking down upon you in heaven. He’s smiling knowing that you are moving forward with your life. Cathy, don’t even worry about that. I know for a fact that you will love another man. I think that you already do, you just don’t see it yet because you’re not ready to. People will always love you, you don’t have to worry about not ever being loved again. You’re a great person,” She said as the light shown through the stained glass window. “Let’s go to the beach after this. It’s Daddy’s tradition.” She said and smiled. “I’ll be in the hall waiting. Say your last goodbye and come and get me. We’ll run again. You always feel free after that.” She walked away leaving Cathy alone with Marc.
She peered up at the light shining through the windows and smiled. “I know you are here, Marc. I feel you with me all the time. I don’t want to ever lose that feeling. You were my first love and I will always love you. I don’t want you to ever forget that. I think that you would want me to be happy, so I hope that you understand why I am doing what I am doing next. I didn’t want to ever hurt you. I love you so much. Goodbye Marc.” She took her hand off the casket, leaving the room without looking back.
Chapter 18Present Day
It was still hard to believe that her life had turned out this way. If someone would have asked her three years ago, if this was the way she would have seen her life, she would have responded with not in a million years. As she sat on the rock and overlooked Ocean Beach, she could still feel his presence. Time had gone on and she still felt the loss of him. Some days were worse than others. Like today. Seeing the ocean had always reminded her of him. He had died surfing and whenever she saw the fierce waves coming in, she often thought of him.
Through everything that had happened, she had learned that life was short. There wasn’t much time to waste. She knew that now. She had lost the two men that she had been the closest to. Her father and the love of her life. Thinking of loving another man seemed impossible. She didn’t believe that it would have ever happened again. Not after everything that she had been through in the past decade of her life. But for some reason, she was destined to find love. She couldn’t give up on it. No matter what she was thinking or feeling, love seemed to find her.
“Cathy? Are you ready to go home now?” He stood a few feet away from her now and gave her a concerning look. He always was worried about her well-being. He knew that her past hadn’t always been kind to her, but he had.
She got up from the rock and looked at him admiringly. Every day she loved him more and more. After everything she had been through, she didn’t even know how love was possible for her again. But here it was standing right in front of her. It had taken her some time to get used to, but she loved him. By the way he was looking at her, she knew that he loved her just as much. She had been so lucky to have met him.
“Yes, I’m ready.” She came closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. After passionately kissing him, she grabbed his hand and they started to walk towards the beach together. “Let’s go on a beach walk. I don’t feel like going hom
e yet.”
“Sounds like a plan. Are you feeling alright?” He asked running a hand over her cheek. “You look flushed. I hope you’re not coming down with something.”
“No, no I am fine. Don’t worry about me. I’ve just been thinking about everything that led me to you.” She grinned as they had finally made it to the beach. Even though she was a grown woman, she still loved the feeling of the sand in-between her toes. Everything felt right in the world when she was next to the ocean. She felt as if she belonged here. Looking down at the diamond on her left hand that shimmered in the sunlight, she realized that she felt content. The man next to her was hers for life and she couldn’t help but to look him warmly in the eyes with pleasure.
“Oh, what are you thinking about?” He asked worriedly.
“Just everything. I was thinking that maybe we are soul mates and that we were destined to be together. What do you think?” Cathy asked as the wind blew her hair all around her face. She couldn’t be happier. She hadn’t been this happy in a long time. It was as if everything had fallen in place. For once in her life everything felt right.
“I don’t know if I believe in soul mates. I think sometimes people just come together, but there’s no code for them to do so. They come together because they have a lot in common or they end up miraculously falling in love.” He smirked at her stunned expression.
“What?” She was taken aback. It wasn’t the answer she was hoping for.
“You know I am just kidding right?” He poked her stomach.
She sighed a breath of relief. “It wasn’t very funny. Don’t joke about our life together.” She put her hands on her hips trying to be serious, but ended up laughing.
“You know that I have always loved you. From the minute that I met you, I fell in love with you. I just couldn’t tell you at the time because you were with Marc and you appeared to be happy with him. I waited so long to tell you because I wanted to make sure that you were fully done grieving and this was what you wanted too. But yes I do believe that we were meant for each other. We have so much in common and every day that I spend with you is better than before. You’re my best friend and I love you. After the marines, I never thought I could be fully happy again. I came out depressed and uncertain about life after my injury. When I started Shark Savors, I started to feel better and I started to regain my passion in life again. But it wasn’t until I met you that I began to feel whole again. You changed my life for the better and I love you more than I thought I could ever love a woman.” He said with sincerity.
She laughed and he gave her a look of dread.
“Why are you laughing? I was being serious.” He said pulling his baseball cap down below his eyes.
“Because I love you Chris. It’s just that speech sounded a lot like your engagement speech. I started laughing thinking that you memorized it or something.” She said with a whimsical laugh.
“No, no I didn’t memorize it. I’m not that big of a dork,” He said now laughing as well. “I love you more Cathy. I’m glad that we are spending the rest of our lives together. I didn’t think I would ever get the chance to do that with you. I feel blessed.”
“I’m pretty happy about it too. I know we have only been married for two years, but these two years have been the best of my life. I didn’t think I would ever find this kind of love again. We’re pretty lucky.” She smiled thinking about all of the good times they had. She could honestly say that she loved him from the bottom of her heart.
They walked along the beach together still holding hands and Cathy was completely in bliss. The wedding had been beautiful. She had worn a white dress with lacy accents and her mother’s veil. Her mother had walked her down the aisle and had given her away to Chris. It had been one of the happiest days of her life. Carly had been her maid of honor. The summertime wedding had been filled with joy and happiness.
The light had shown through the windows of the church and the sky had turned red. Even though her father and Marc were not alive anymore, she still felt their presence. It felt warm and happy. She felt as if they were both pleased she had chosen Chris. He was a great man who treated her like gold. She felt needed and wanted whenever she was with him. He was the one she was meant to spend her life with, at the time she just hadn’t known it.
The past three years had been mostly filled with joy. Ever since Marc’s funeral, Cathy had been able to fully move on with her life. Although she hadn’t made it back to working at the aquarium, she had fully joined the team at Shark Savors. She was proud to say that she was part of the full-time staff that kept the organization going. While working at Shark Savors, she had found her passion again. The work was different from the aquarium, but she loved it just as much. She felt as if she was making a difference in the lives of animals.
A few months after Marc’s funeral, Chris had confessed one night that he loved her and that he always had. Cathy realized that she felt the same way. Ever since that day, she had been perfectly happy. At some points, she did miss Marc. But she realized that he wasn’t ever going to come back and he would have wanted her to be happy. As time passed on, she wondered if Marc had really been right for her and if they would have made their relationship last. Chris had more in common with her and he seemed to understand her needs and personality better. Instead of thinking about it deeper, she just decided that God had a plan and knew what was right for her.
As they walked along, Cathy saw something intruding from the sand. She wondered what it was and why it was sticking out like a sore thumb on the beach. “Chris, what is that?” She asked interrupting the silence. “Let’s go investigate.”
“There’s always a mystery when I am with you,” He said while he laughed. “But don’t get me wrong. I love it.”
Still holding his hand, she pulled him toward the heap of sand with the object sticking out of it. She let go of his hand momentarily, as she dug through the sand to pull it through. When it was in her hands, she was completely speechless. It was a piece of Marc’s board. His favorite red board that he had always used to surf. The board that his father had died using. What were even more shocking were the words that were written on it. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. The words I love you Cathy were written in cursive on the red side of the board.
“Can you believe this?” She asked Chris still in awe. “I can’t believe that we recovered this. I wonder how it got here. I thought he died while surfing Stinson Beach.”
“It is quite amazing. Maybe the water carried it over in this direction or maybe it’s a sign. Marc wanted you to know that he still loves you and he always will.” Chris put a hand on her back as she suddenly stood up.
“I will always love him, but I love you too and I want to spend my life with you.”
“I know you do. I understand. I love you and I want what is best for you. I’m just saying it’s a sign from him from above. He’s letting you know how he feels.” Chris grabbed her hand again and kissed it.
“Now you just sound like Daddy.” She said giving him a look that he couldn’t help but laugh at.
“I guess I am being metaphorical. If I wasn’t into saving the animals of the planet, I might have been a great philosopher. I just find it strange that you would find it on this beach at this point in your life at this time. That’s why I’m saying it must be a sign.” He said as they began walking along the beach again.
“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. Who knows? All I know is I know who I want to give it to.” She looked out at the waves knowing it would be the last time she would come to the beach for a while. The winter months would be cold and Chris had planned a trip to Mexico for them to go on. She was excited about studying sharks that were in a different environment. She couldn’t wait for all of the new and exciting opportunities that would be coming her way in her future with Chris.
“Who are you going to give it to?” He asked interestedly.
“Hmmmm, let’s see. He’s on this beach. He has blond hair, blue eyes and some really cut
e swim trunks.” She said trying to be mysterious.
“I’m thinking that guy sounds a lot like me.” He laughed trying to take the piece of the board from her.
“Not so fast,” She giggled. “I wasn’t exactly talking about you.”
They approached a gray-haired lady with her hair in a bun who was holding a little boy. The little boy smiled as he played with the bun in her hair. Instead of being frustrated or reprimanding him, the old lady laughed along with him. In her eyes, anyone could see the love she had for the young boy. She looked happy and pleased. The large smile on her face told Cathy so. Cathy couldn’t help but to smile too. Whenever she saw that little boy, her heart was filled with joy.
“Mommy!” The little boy squealed with joy as he motioned to be put down and ran towards Cathy.
She picked him up in her arms and held him. “I love you, Marc. Look Mommy has a gift for you. She found it on the beach.”
He smiled and clapped it between his hands.
“It’s from your godfather, Marc.” She kissed the little boy on his forehead and he laughed.
“He’s a little young to appreciate the meaning of it yet, dear.” Marion had finally made her way over to where Cathy and Chris were standing. “Give him a few years. He’ll understand more in a few years.”
“You’re right. He’s so little right now. In a few years, he’ll be a bright little boy. Won’t you Marc?” She said as she felt a sense of pride and joy as she held her son.
“Daddy!” He squealed as he held out his hands towards Chris, who took him in his arms swiftly.
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