off the dance floor.
Joey blushes as soon as she sits down at the table with him.
Jack slides off the dance floor back to Tim.
JACK
Dude, I had her!
TIM
Look.
They both watch Britney.
She takes a long chug of Joey's bottled water. She mutters a few words to him and leans back to tease him with her cleavage. He fumbles through his pocket and gives her some money. She snatches the money from him and trots off to the bar.
JACK
We have to get her car keys out of her purse.
TIM
Which purse?
JACK
I will distract the nerd. You get the keys.
Jack strolls by Joey and bumps him. His glasses flip off his head and bounce onto the floor. He crawls around trying to find them. Jack sweeps them up. Joey looks up and squints his eyes really hard to focus on Jack.
With his blurred vision, he sees a thick figure in a plaid skirt and white shirt with shaggy hair.
Jack stands like a dainty female with his knees bent and his back arched.
JACK
(feminine)
Did you drop these, sweetheart?
Tim swipes the purses and makes for the bathroom.
Joey staggers to his feet and rubs his eyes. He squints and strains to see Jack as he desperately reaches out for his glasses. Jack drops them on the table and disappears into a crowd. Joey slides his glasses on and looks around.
JOEY
Where'd she go? She was more beautiful than an angel!
CUT TO:
INT: BATHROOM.
Tim leans against the wall in a bathroom stall. He rummages through one of the purses. Jack scurries in.
JACK
Tim?
Tim raises his arm up for Jack to see. Jack squeezes into the stall with him.
JACK
Wow, I think you are in deeper than you wanted, Tim. First, you fogged that guy with bug poison and then you stole four purses. Assault and petty theft all for me! Dude, you are the best brother a brother could have!
TIM
Yeah, pay me your share of the rent for once and we'll call it even.
JACK
That just cut me deep.
Tim continues to rummage through the purses.
TIM
Alright, I got some gum, lip stick, some more lipstick, a hair brush and...ewwww, something sticky on my fingers!
Tim wipes his hand on some toilet paper. Jack continues to dig in the purses.
JACK
Keys. We just need the keys.
Jack pulls three sets of keys from the four purses.
TIM
How do you know which set is the one you need?
Jack fondles a set of keys in his hand. It has a few different key chains. One of the key chains on the set is a yellow plastic replica of the Volkswagen insignia, V and W. Another key chain is a small acrylic picture with some writing.
INSERT: KEYCHAIN
The Good, the Plaid, and the Ugly Page 7