Quinn’s glance shifted to Kelly. “I think you’re going to see a big improvement this Saturday. Samuel has good rotation and quick hands.”
“I’m not sure what that means, but it sounds good. We’ll get out of your hair now. We’ve got a book report to write.” Kelly looked at Ellen. “It was nice meeting you.”
“Same here.”
“See you tomorrow, Quinn.”
“Goodnight, Kelly.”
Once the silver minivan had disappeared, Quinn turned to Ellen. “You look tired. Did that thunderstorm that rolled in after midnight keep you awake?”
She laughed. “A little. I thought for sure my electricity was going to go out.”
“It happens here a lot because of the trees being so close to the power lines. If you’re not in the mood for more of Isobel’s leftovers, I’ve got some leftovers of my own. Jase ordered two pizzas from Dom’s today.”
“Mmm. I love Dom’s pizza.”
As Ellen preceded him up the stairs, she couldn’t help but echo Kelly’s wish that Avery would stay away from Quinn. Hadn’t she done enough damage already?
* * * * *
Quinn felt an easing of the depression that had settled over him from the moment Avery walked in his office. Spending time with Ellen was like finding an oasis in the desert. If only it was enough to make him forget the circumstances that brought him to the desert in the first place. He wasn’t sure anything could do that.
She picked up her shirt off the counter. “You didn’t have to wash it.”
He walked around her to the stove. “Why not? You washed mine.”
“That’s different. I wore your shirt.”
“That’s just semantics.”
“You like that word, don’t you?”
“It’s my word of the month. How many pieces do you want?”
“Two, please.”
He slid six pieces out of the box and onto a pan. “How did things go in the world of flowers today?”
“Everything wasn’t coming up roses, but there were a few bright spots. I got a call from the editor of St. Marys Living about participating in a series of articles about weddings. They picked me to be the featured florist. I got so excited I almost dropped the phone.”
He hid a smile. It appeared his suggestion to the editor’s daughter had produced results. “That’s great, Ellen. That should bring you some business.”
She leaned against the counter, twirling her hair around her finger. “I’ll take all the free advertising I can get. What I can’t figure out is why they selected me. I’m not the only florist in this area.”
“Your reputation precedes you. When you do good work, people talk about it.”
“That’s what Frank said. Is Jase out again?”
“He’s catching up on his social life. When he’s writing, he hardly leaves the house or his room for that matter.”
“I don’t know that I could do that. I need a change of scenery. When I worked at the bank, I sometimes felt stifled sitting in my office all day looking at the same four walls.”
He put the pan in the oven. “Kind of like what I do?”
“It was nothing like what you do. I went to staff meetings, wasted a lot of trees printing reports, and ruined my eyes staring at numbers on a computer screen. I was under pressure to meet quotas for loans and forced to turn down people who desperately needed them. In short, nothing I did really meant anything. Being a doctor does mean something; you make a difference in the world. I know that being a florist isn’t comparable, but in a small way, I think I impact lives in a positive way.”
“I agree. You’re an integral part of the most important days in most people’s lives: birthdays, engagements, weddings, and holidays. However, you’ve made it challenging for the men in your own life. Do they send flowers to the florist?”
“That’s an interesting question. I’ve only had one boyfriend since becoming a florist, and he never sent me flowers.” She tapped her cheek in a gesture he was becoming familiar with. “Now that I think about it, he never gave me anything. I guess he was too busy trying to cover his tracks so I wouldn’t find out he was cheating on me.”
“He was a fool to let you go,” Quinn said as he removed the pizza from the oven.
Ellen’s eyes twinkled. “I like to think so. By the way, I won’t have to do the flowers for his wedding. His fiancé must have changed her mind because I doubt Mark would have bothered to do anything about it.”
“She probably realized the wisdom of keeping him away from you.”
“Or she found someone cheaper. Either way I’m glad to be rid of them. I made my first delivery to Magnolia Manor today. Your grandfather’s in a very nice place.”
“He’s not too happy with me right now. I can’t make it to the weekly card game. I’m taking my mother to Sea Island for her monthly Audubon Society meeting. She doesn’t like to drive back late at night by herself, and my dad has something else going on.”
“Can’t Jase take your mom?”
“He could, but my mother refuses to ride as a passenger in any car Jase is driving. He has a habit of looking away from the road when he’s talking. It makes her very nervous.”
“It would make me nervous, too.”
Once the pizza had been eaten, Ellen talked Quinn out of leaving the dishes for Jase.
“It’ll only take a few minutes to wash up everything,” she pointed out. “While I’m doing it, you can tell me about your day.”
“Well, let’s see. I visited the newborn nursery at the hospital, did some well checks, looked into a lot of little ears and mouths, tickled a few tummies, put in some stitches, and calmed down some anxious moms.”
“In other words, a normal day at the office.”
“Not completely normal. I had a visitor just before lunch. An unwanted visitor. Avery came to see me.”
“Without calling first or anything?”
“Yep. I was almost as upset with her for coming to see me at work as I was for her coming to see me at all. Why do people always say they’re doing something for you when in reality they’re doing it for themselves?”
Ellen dried her hands and then turned to lean against the counter. “Because it sounds better. It makes them look less self-absorbed.”
“It’s a little late for that. Avery showed her true colors. I thought she was done bringing turmoil into my life, but it appears I’m due for another installment. Her boyfriend is coming to work at the clinic. They’ll be no avoiding him or her unless I lock myself in my office.”
“I’m sorry, Quinn. I know that won’t be easy for you.”
He stared down at the floor and smiled faintly. “That’s what my mother said when I told her, and I’m sure the rest of my friends and family will have similar sentiments. It’s funny; pity is about the only emotion I can arouse in anyone these days.”
She moved in front of him, too close to be ignored. “You’re wrong about that. I admire and respect you. That doesn’t leave room for pity.”
More than her words, the sincerity in her voice and the warmth in her eyes were his undoing. It was the oasis thing all over again. His hand rose to cup her chin and then his thumb skimmed the fullness of her lower lip. She quivered in response. He leaned down and captured that softness with his mouth, seeking comfort and getting much more.
* * * * *
Quinn’s warm breath caressed Ellen’s neck just ahead of his lips, sliding down the side of her throat and tracing the sensitive skin of her collarbone. His touch left sparks in its wake. Her mind went blank when his lips returned to hers, his kisses saying all that he wouldn’t. When her hands slid up his chest to rest on his shoulders, he groaned audibly and pulled away.
“This is wrong. I shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Why is it wrong?” she asked, wishing she could erase the anxiety and remorse in his eyes.
He brushed the hair away from her face with gentle fingers. “Because it won’t work.”
“How do you know? You
can’t deny there’s something between us. Isn’t it worth finding out what it is?”
Quinn stepped away from her, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “I know what it is. You’re reliving a childhood crush, and I’m taking advantage of it. Look at me, Ellen. I’m not that guy anymore.”
There was a raw edge to his voice that tugged at her heart. She walked over to where he stood and placed her hands on either side of his face, forcing him to look at her. “I am looking, Quinn. The same tenderness shines out of your eyes. The same kindness reaches out to enfold me when you smile. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you’ll always be beautiful to me.”
He put his hands over hers and drew them away. “You don’t know what you’re saying. The scars on my face are only the beginning.”
She touched his shirt. “Whatever is under there doesn’t matter.”
“You have no idea how bad it is. I can barely stand to look at myself. It’s not something I want to share with anyone else.”
“If this accident had happened to Avery, would it have changed the way you feel about her?”
He moved restlessly. “It wouldn’t have changed anything. I loved her.”
“Then stop acting like no one can love you. To do so is to diminish what love really is.”
“That’s easy to say when you’re standing on the other side. You have no concept what it’s like to be disfigured, what it feels like to watch someone’s face change when they see you. Then to have them quickly avert their eyes or turn away. You have no frame of reference for being an object of pity to almost everyone you meet.”
“You’re right. I don’t know what you’re going through, but you’re wrong to assume how I’ll react. You’re lumping me in with everyone else, and that’s not fair. I resent the implication that I’m judgmental and small-minded.”
“I never meant to imply either of those things. I’m trying to make you understand.”
“I appreciate that, but the end result is the same. You’re going to use this as an excuse to push me away. You’re refusing to give me a chance.”
“It’s not an excuse. After what happened with Avery, I made a decision. Nothing has happened since to change my mind.”
“So the kisses we’ve shared don’t mean anything? This has just been a little game you were playing.”
He bit down hard on his lip. “I can see where you might feel that way, but it wasn’t a game. I would never purposely do that to you or any woman for that matter. It was a mistake to kiss you. I never should have done it. My actions gave you the wrong idea, and I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too, because you’re wrong about me, you and us. Kisses don’t lie, Quinn. Unlike words, they can’t be twisted around to mean something else. They can’t be taken back or explained away. They’ll always be there between us.” She walked over and picked up her shirt. “Thanks for the pizza.”
All the color faded from his face, but he didn’t say anything. He went with her to the door, even reaching out to open it. When he started to follow her outside, she put up a hand to stop him.
“That’s okay. I can see myself home. It’s only a few steps.”
Without waiting to see if he complied, she turned to go. When she reached her door, she glanced over her shoulder. He was still standing where she left him. A gentleman to the end, she thought as a tear slid down her cheek. Once inside the relative safety of the cottage, she stood for a moment leaning against the solid wood door.
Did he actually think she couldn’t see what he was doing? Quinn wasn’t pulling away from her because he didn’t care; he was pulling away because he cared too much.
* * * * *
Quinn watched as the door to the cottage closed and then waited for the lights to come on inside. His fingers clenched into fists. He despised the weakness that had created this situation, the need for companionship and acceptance that ultimately caused him to hurt someone he cared about. In the process, he’d probably lost a friend, and he certainly could have used one.
A flash of lights in the driveway signaled the return of his brother. Hopefully Jase’s evening had gone better than his.
“What are you doing outside?” Jase asked as he joined Quinn on the stairs. “Wishing on a star?”
Nothing so innocent or enjoyable. “Ellen just went home. Do I need to congratulate you on your upcoming wedding?”
“You don’t propose on the first date. Even I’m not that reckless.”
“That’s good to know. I’ve got some paperwork to finish.”
That wasn’t entirely true, but it gave him a reason to go to his office. After he pushed things around on his desk for an hour, he went upstairs to his room. He didn’t expect to be able to sleep, and he didn’t. All he kept seeing was Ellen’s face when he told her that he never should have kissed her. It was the truth; but not for the reason he’d given her.
The next morning Kelly took one look at his haggard appearance and immediately got up to fix him some coffee. He didn’t say anything as he watched her lace it with enough sugar to make it unpalatable. At this point, he didn’t care.
“I hope helping Samuel didn’t cause your back to flare up again,” she said as she handed him the cup.
Quinn wished his two fused vertebrae were to blame for his loss of sleep. He had medicine he could take for that. There wasn’t anything to relieve the guilt of deliberately misleading someone. “It didn’t. I stayed up too late. And before you ask the next question, I’m not losing sleep over Avery.”
“That’s a relief. I moved all the appointments after two-thirty to before lunch. You’re in for a busy morning.”
He took a sip of the coffee. It was like drinking sugar water. “A few cups of this should keep me awake.”
The morning blurred into the afternoon. By three-thirty, he was exiting the room of his last patient and making his way out the back door to pick up his mother.
“You look awful,” was her greeting when she let him in the house.
“That bad, huh?”
“Yes, it’s that bad. What in the world are you doing to yourself?”
Getting what he deserved; that’s what he was doing. “Nothing out of the ordinary.”
“I went into Violets are Blue today.”
Quinn rolled his eyes. “Let me guess. You wanted to order flowers.”
“Not at all. I wanted to see Ellen in daylight and with clothes on. She was just as pretty and nice as I remembered.”
“Did you tell her so?”
“No, there were several customers in the shop. I was only able to talk with her for a few minutes.”
Thank goodness for that. Ellen wouldn’t have had time to tell his mother what a jerk she had for a son. “Are Terry and Lucas still planning on taking a cruise to Mexico for their anniversary?”
As a red herring, this subject worked perfectly. Quinn’s parents had been going on cruises for the last ten years. It was his mother’s preferred type of vacation, and she considered herself something of an expert. She was still describing the ten-day cruise they’d taken to Alaska last year when he pulled the Jaguar into the parking lot of The Lodge resort on Sea Island.
After making sure he delivered her to the right conference room, Quinn found a discreet corner of the spacious lobby in which to sit down. It wasn’t long before his thoughts gravitated to Ellen. He might as well get used to it because short of finding a way to reset his brain back to where it had been a few weeks ago, this was how it was going to be.
* * * * *
Ellen lay in bed listening to the patter of rain drops hitting her roof. It had been three days since Quinn spoke the words that brought an end to their budding relationship. He might not have known it, but his avoidance of her was a confirmation rather than a denial of his feelings. If he was indifferent there would be no reason to pretend she didn’t exist. She’d pulled him out of his comfort zone, and he was doing everything to get back there.
Hopefully, the rain that was helping to put her to sleep wou
ldn’t put an end to her plans for tomorrow. Since Quinn had gone into hiding, Ellen invited Isobel and Winnie to go with her to the farm to pick blueberries. If they left early, they could be back by noon which left her plenty of time to get ready for the wedding she was doing in the late afternoon.
The next morning brought a return of the sun. There wasn’t a sound from the house next door when she exited the cottage and opened the door of her car. She reached into the back seat to make sure the seatbelts they needed for Winnie’s booster seat were functional.
“Where are you off to this fine morning?” asked a deep voice from behind her.
It wasn’t the voice she’d hoped to hear, but she summoned a smile and glanced over her shoulder. “Hey, Jase. I’m going blueberry picking. Want to come along?”
“Thanks for the invite, but I’m on my way to pick up Quinn. He took the Jaguar into the dealership for its monthly servicing. We’re heading to Valdosta for a car show.”
She knew Quinn was avoiding her; why did having it confirmed make it any worse? “It’s a nice day for doing something outside.”
“Yes, it is. What’s going on with you and Quinn? He looks like he hasn’t slept in a month.”
“Nothing’s going on. He just wants to be friends.”
Jase scratched his chin. “That doesn’t make sense. I was so sure, especially after I found your…, then again, this is Quinn we’re talking about: Mr. I-Don’t-Need-Anyone. I’m sure seeing Avery again didn’t help, either.”
“He’s had a lot thrown at him lately. It’s easy for us to question his actions, but we’re not in his shoes. The fact that he puts on such a strong front is misleading. It makes everyone think he’s okay, but underneath he’s dealing with things we know nothing about. When you don’t like what you see in the mirror, it makes it difficult to believe anyone else will.”
“I don’t want you to think I’m making light of it, Ellen. His scars are bad; I’ve seen them. He has every reason to want to hide away, and that’s probably what I’d be doing, too, if I was in his shoes. It just hurts that I can’t do anything to help him.”
Yours, With Love: A Sweet Contemporary Romance (Finding Love Book 5) Page 13