[Measure of Devotion 03.0] Measure of Peace

Home > Other > [Measure of Devotion 03.0] Measure of Peace > Page 8
[Measure of Devotion 03.0] Measure of Peace Page 8

by Caethes Faron


  “John showed us around today.”

  “I know. I know everything that happens on this ranch.”

  Jason continued, ignoring the interruption. “It’s impressive. I never knew how massive it all was.”

  “Of course not. You could never be bothered to care.”

  Jason focused on his soup. There was nothing more he could think to say. How did Kale expect him to make this work?

  The rest of the soup course passed in silence. After his bowl was cleared away, a plate with a thick steak, potatoes, and green beans was placed in front of Jason, standard fare at the ranch. Beef had been served every night that Jason could remember. In front of his father sat an identical plate, except the steak was already cut into tiny, bite-sized pieces. Jason guessed it was to lessen his father’s chance of choking. As a child, Jason had been mortified by his father’s table manners. Robert always took such big bites of meat that he resembled the cows chewing cud. Darlene, their cook, must have been worried that one of those large bites would get lodged in his throat should he cough.

  Robert grimaced when he saw the plate and banged his fist on the table. It used to be he could shake the whole table with that fist. Now it barely made a sound. “Demetri, have Darlene come here, please.”

  “Yes, Master.” Demetri bowed and scuttled into the kitchen.

  A few minutes later, Darlene, looking as formidable as she had to Jason as a child, stood before Robert.

  “Darlene, we have had this conversation before. I do not need my food cut for me like I’m a damn child.”

  “Yes, Master.”

  Jason tried to hide his smile. Darlene was the same as she had ever been. Robert glared at her. “Was that a ‘yes you’re right, Master’ or a ‘yes you need your food cut, Master’?”

  “You know you tear off pieces of your steak bigger than your mouth. The doctor says you shouldn’t even be eating meat, sir, but you command me to fix it for you, so I do. And after you nearly choked that time, I’m going to keep cutting it up for you until you’re better. If you don’t like it, there are potatoes and beans on that plate that’d be better for you anyway, sir. I won’t have you choking to death on my cooking and ruining my good reputation, Master.”

  Robert sat stone still. Jason couldn’t see the expression on his face, and he cringed to think what he would do. Darlene stood proudly before him, not backing down. If anyone could get away with talking to his father that way, it was she. The woman had been with the family as long as Jason could remember. It was impossible to think of home without picturing Darlene in the kitchen.

  After a tense minute, Robert chuckled and then laughed outright. “Go get back to your kitchen, Darlene.”

  Darlene bobbed her head and left.

  “I thought you beat slaves who talked to you like that.” Jason said when the meal resumed.

  “Darlene knows her place. I only beat slaves who forget.” Robert eyed Kale before stabbing a piece of steak with his fork. “That woman has kept me fed for more than twenty years.” Robert chewed his bite slowly before he swallowed. “She has a right to protect her reputation.” Robert chuckled again. “What kind of slave would she be if it turned out I choked to death on her food?”

  So many of Jason’s feelings toward his father would’ve been resolved if Robert had treated Kale the same way he treated Darlene. It baffled Jason that it was too much to ask that his father treat the love of his life with the same level of courtesy with which he treated his cook.

  Jason caught some movement out of the corner of his eye and saw that Kale was shaking his head at him. His feelings must have shown on his face. Jason supposed he could keep his thoughts to himself and talk them through with Kale later. No doubt his lover would have some annoyingly simple way to make Robert’s behavior make sense. However, if he wasn’t going to give voice to his feelings, he would have to stay silent. He had no more patience for his father.

  The only sound in the dining room was the clink of silverware on plates and the occasional hacking cough from Robert. It was awkward, but Jason guessed it was preferable to heated argument.

  “If you don’t mind me asking, sir—” Jason and Robert both looked at Kale, stunned by the intrusion into their silence, “—how did you build all this? From what I understand, you didn’t inherit any of it. To go from nothing to the biggest cattle operation in the country in one generation, it’s unheard of. I’d love to hear how you managed it, if it’s not too much trouble, sir.” Kale’s eyes were earnest, and he leaned toward Robert, eager for his response. Even Jason couldn’t tell if it was an act.

  Robert wiped his mouth with his napkin. “I bought this land when I was twenty years old. I was an orphan and had been working since I was nine. I saved everything I earned. This bit of land had been for sale for a while. It was raw and wild, and no one wanted to put the effort into taming it. I convinced the owner to sell it to me a piece at a time. I still don’t know why he agreed to it. I fenced some land down by the creek and bought five head of cattle and a horse.

  “I still worked any labor jobs I could find. Those first couple of years, I lived in a tent perched right where this house stands. There was too much work to be done for me to build a cabin. The first thing I built here was the stable for Trudy, my horse. I spent every minute of the day working until I was so tired that sleeping on the cold ground seemed luxurious.”

  Robert shook his head. “I couldn’t do that now. It’s amazing the things a young body can withstand. I don’t know if I would have ever got around to building a cabin if I hadn’t met Lena. I remember the first time I saw her. I was shearing sheep, and she was visiting with the boss’s daughter. That night, I went home and knew I had to build a cabin. I couldn’t very well go ask to court her without a home.” A rattling cough swallowed his chuckle.

  “So I built this cabin. It wasn’t nearly so big. We added on to it as the years went by, and I could afford to put some money into it. I don’t know what possessed me to think that having a plain cabin and a ranch that hadn’t yet turned a profit qualified me to go courtin’, but I did. To this day, I don’t know what Lena saw in me. She could have married anyone, and she loved the city and pretty things. I couldn’t give her any of that. I could only give her four walls and roof and the promise that I would love her ’til all the breath was out of my body.

  “When we married, she didn’t know a thing about cattle, and she could only ride sidesaddle. I hated to see her work, but she insisted, and it really helped. I don’t know if I could have held on long enough to see my first profit if it hadn’t been for her.”

  “How did you go from five cattle to this?” Kale was wide-eyed.

  “Discipline. Everything we earned went back into the business. I couldn’t afford a decent bull, so we used the best stud we could afford. I knew we’d start earning faster if we invested in the best quality rather than raise subpar cattle and try to break out of it into higher quality later. Lena milked the cows and sold the dairy. We even sold their dung as manure. Once I was able to quit working for other people, we started growing our own hay and used the dung ourselves. Around that time, I purchased our first slaves. It was a relief to have more hands.

  “Lena and I had been trying for children, but there were difficulties. It worked out for the best. By the time Jason was on the way, we were a full operation. We profited off of every bit of the cattle. We made money off their milk, their hides, their meat. We didn’t take the easy road and just raise ‘em and sell ‘em so someone else could make the money.”

  “So that’s where Jason gets his love of efficiency.” Kale smiled at father and son.

  Jason had never thought of it before. His father had never sat him down and explained the concept of efficiency to him, but his example had planted the lesson. Robert didn’t waste anything, and Jason knew from an early age that no part of the cattle was allowed to pass through their ranch without leaving them money.

  “Huh?”

  “Well, that’s how he’s bec
ome so successful, sir. Arlington Steel was only a fraction of the size it is now when he inherited it from his father-in-law. He’s always said efficiency is the quickest and easiest way to increase profits.”

  “Quick and easy. That sounds like my son. What we do here is certainly not quick or easy.”

  “Absolutely. I’m sorry if I implied otherwise, sir. I guess I didn’t explain myself well. Jason’s an expert at looking at the operation and maximizing productivity. His mills produce more than any others, and that increase has allowed him to expand the business and build more mills in strategic locations. I can only assume that he learned it from you.”

  Their dinner plates were carted away, and slices of apple pie were brought to the table. Jason couldn’t remember ever hearing his father talk this much. Every word Robert spoke was news to him. All he had ever heard from his father was that he had built this place from nothing. Until now, Jason hadn’t really known what that meant.

  “Hmph. I suppose some of his old man might’ve rubbed off on him, despite his efforts to the contrary. We certainly didn’t expand our business until we knew we could. I’ve seen too many folks be lured in by the promise of a bright future and get themselves entangled in debt. We operate on a strictly cash basis. That’s why it took so long for us to add on to the house. As soon as Lena told me I was going to be a daddy, I knew I couldn’t raise my son in the little old cabin Lena and I were living in. I wanted to build a whole new home. We could have afforded it, but Lena was sentimental. She didn’t want to abandon the house I had built her. So instead, we added on.” Robert smiled. “I was determined to prove to her that I could provide as good a life as she could have had with anyone else, so I made sure this would be the house of her dreams. All the modern appliances went into it, a private bathroom for every bedroom, the best gas lighting and fixtures. I wanted to make sure when her parents came to visit after the birth they would be impressed by how I took care of their little girl. It doesn’t even really resemble the original cabin, but Lena loved the sentiment.”

  “So that’s where Jason gets it from.”

  Jason snorted. “I’m the sentimental one? I’m not the man who carried a lock of his lover’s hair around for three years.”

  “A moment of weakness on my part. You have always been sentimental.”

  “I have to agree with Kale. You are entirely too attached to sentiment. I think Kale’s all the proof we need of that.” The mild tone of his father’s voice made the words seem almost nice.

  Robert yawned, and Jason noticed that his eyes drooped. By his own admission, Robert had slept much of the day. When Jason was a child, his father had been up with the sun and worked until late into the night. It was strange to think that a simple meal and conversation was enough to tire him.

  “Dinner was delightful, Father. Thank you.”

  Robert nodded. “Yes, I suppose it was.”

  Robert made no move to stand, signaling the end of dinner. It occurred to Jason that he hadn’t seen his father stand the entire time he had been home. Given his father’s state and the way he was constantly propped up with pillows, Jason realized that Demetri must be carrying him. Robert wouldn’t want his son to see him carted around like an invalid. “May Kale and I be excused? It’s getting late.”

  “Yes, of course. Have a nice night.” Robert genuinely smiled and nodded at both Jason and Kale.

  In the hall, Jason put his arm around Kale’s waist and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”

  “I figured someone had to nudge the two of you along.”

  “Yes, and you did beautifully.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  In bed, Jason rolled around this new image of his father as he laid on his back, staring in the darkness. It was easy to get wrapped up in the warm spell cast by the story his father had told, but he just couldn’t reconcile his conflicting images of the man.

  “What are you thinking about?” Kale was on his side with his back to Jason.

  “How do you know I’m thinking about anything?”

  “Because you think too loud. You might as well tell me what it is. I’m not going to be able to sleep until you stop.”

  Jason smiled. Being known so well never ceased to amaze him. It was an entirely comfortable feeling. “I just don’t know what to make of my father.”

  “Then don’t make anything of him. Just love him, respect him, and be content.”

  “But I can’t make sense of him.”

  “Yes, no use being content when you can fret instead.” Jason felt Kale roll over to face him.

  “He’s such an enigma.”

  “Only to you. He’s quite a simple man. I believe that used to be your complaint about him.”

  “You’re telling me you understand him? You understand how he could allow Darlene to speak to him like that, but he couldn’t tolerate the love of my life being far more respectful?”

  “That’s precisely the problem. You treated me like a lover, and I treated you the same. That’s what your father had issue with. He’s actually a very fair man when it comes to his slaves. That’s his reputation. If he were a tyrant, I would have heard about it back when I belonged to Carter.”

  “But he treats Darlene like family, why can’t you be treated as family?”

  “For one, Darlene has earned her place in this household. She’s loyal and hardworking. Second, I’ll concede that she is part of the family, but the same way a dog or pet is. You love your dog, but you won’t hesitate to shoot him if he turns vicious.”

  “He should have treated you better.”

  “You need to see it from his point of view. I was way out of line with you and you with me. We were lovers for gods’ sakes. He was right when he said that you weren’t merely fucking me. You cared about me more than you should have, and you let me get away with everything. I had forgotten my place, and he took it upon himself to correct me. It wasn’t his right since he didn’t own me, but you can hardly blame him for it.”

  “Oh, I think I can.”

  “In a way, he was trying to protect you. I was dancing dangerously close to the line of impersonating a free man. Had I crossed that line, you would have lost me forever. Someone would have reported us.”

  “Him, most likely.”

  “No, if he’d wanted to, he would have. He could have, but he didn’t. From an objective viewpoint, he did us a favor.”

  Jason’s mouth tasted bitter. “How can you defend him?”

  “You’ve put me in a position where I have to. I don’t like it, so if you could just get past it, I’d appreciate it.”

  “I know I should be able to, especially since you have, and you’re the one he slapped and threatened to beat.” Jason sighed, trying to release all his negative feelings with his breath. As soon as he was done, a yawn overtook him.

  Kale threw his arm over Jason and pulled him in tight. Being surrounded by Kale, his scent, his touch, the steady rhythm of his breathing, soothed him. Jason’s body reacted to it as if this was the place he was meant to be, his natural habitat, protected from the outside world.

  “Tonight was nice. There could be more nice moments with your father if you’d only allow it.”

  Kale’s breath tickled his ear, the advice sounding even more practical in Kale’s strong, smooth voice than it already did. “You’re right. You’re always right. It’s rather annoying. I’ll try to let the past be.”

  “Good. Now stop talking, so I can get some sleep.”

  Kale’s lips brushed the rim of Jason’s ear. If nothing else, Jason should love his father for giving him the best man Jason had ever known.

  Chapter Seventeen

  It was easy for Kale to find the hilltop where he and Jason had spoken the previous day. Martin wasn’t likely to call until the evening if he even found anything today. Kale hoped for a call either way. Waiting inside the house would be unbearable, and he wanted Jason to have some time alone with his father. Once they had news from Martin, Kale intended to ask Jason to accompany
him. For all the talk he spouted about Jason needing to spend time with his father, he was selfish enough to take Jason with him when the time came. After what he’d experienced at Monroe’s, Kale knew he couldn’t go through something like that again without Jason’s support.

  After breakfast, he had saddled a horse and sought out the hill with the panoramic view, a sketchpad and pastels in his saddlebags. Kale hobbled the horse and sat to draw. It was nice to work on his art again. He should have done so sooner. With a light hand, he sketched the area and then filled in the color. It wasn’t anything he’d show publicly, but he wanted to unleash himself on the page and produce something, whether or not it was good. Closing his eyes, he pictured the way the scenery had been lit the day before. Taking some reds and oranges, he attempted to recreate the image. The result was a little off—the shadows didn’t fall correctly—but Kale was satisfied.

  Flipping the page, Kale began drawing the mare grazing a few paces away. It was an easy subject that he had drawn countless times. His pencil flew across the page. No need for pastels—he had only wanted those for the sunlit landscape. Within minutes, the horse took shape. A sense of satisfaction overcame him when images came into focus on the page. There was always a moment when he looked at his incomplete work and thought that it could really go either way. He could either make something great, or it could all fall apart. It always amazed him at how simple and small the touches were that made it come alive. A curve here, a shadow there, adding the eyes to a face. Such little things, but without them, the picture fell flat.

  Jason had asked him once how he knew when he was done. Kale still didn’t know. It was always a wild guess how far he would take a picture. Over time, especially since he had been afforded the luxury of pursuing art, he had developed the gut instinct that told him when one more shadow would be too much, when a detail should be left obscured. There was no explaining it, it just was. Kale smirked. This was exactly why he had never accepted the offer to teach an art class. What would he say? Just keep drawing until it feels right?

 

‹ Prev