by L P Peace
‘Good afternoon, Charlotte,’ Kerr turned to her.
Charlotte lowered her lids, shutting off that handsome face and ignoring the increased beating of her heart.
‘I’m so sick of this place,’ she murmured.
‘Ugh! Me too,’ Rowan said.
‘Then it’s fortunate that I came,’ Kerr smiled. ‘I thought you ladies might want to come to the beach.’
‘Beach!’ Elise looked at Charlotte, an urgent, eager look on her face.
‘Beach is a great idea,’ Willow said, standing.
‘Hell yeah!’ Rowan stood. ‘I’ll get blankets!’ she shouted, skipping towards the building.
‘Me and Erica will raid the kitchens,’ Willow said, grabbing Erica’s hand and pulling her up.
‘We will?’ Erica said, almost breathless as Willow dragged her towards the door, pointed looks thrown at the others. Charlotte sighed.
‘I’ll—’
‘Stay there while we get everything ready.’ Willow called back before disappearing. Everyone else disappeared, as though Willow had tugged them behind her in her wake until it was only Kerr, Elise, and Charlotte left behind.
There was a moment of awkward tension before Kerr sat down, popping Elise on his lap. ‘Tell me everything you’ve done since I last saw you.’
Elise reached out, stroking his cheek as she launched into everything they’d done in the last three days since Kerr’s last visit. She loved the feel of his scales under her fingers, and he seemed content to let her stroke him like some kind of living snakeskin handbag.
Charlotte turned to study the alien who had seemed fascinated by her since she first woke up. When he talked to Elise like this, he seemed not to notice her anymore, so she felt safe studying him.
He had a long face and nose, with hooded eyes and lips that were a little fuller than average. She stared at them for a moment, trying not to obsess with the thoughts of nibbling them. Pushing that urge away, she turned her attention to the rest of him. His skin was in shades of grey and orange, turning to iridescent red around his cheekbones, chin, down the sides of his neck, and disappearing under the sharp black uniform of the Protectorate. They reappeared at the back of his hands, becoming smaller and smaller as they went up his finger to the sharp claws. Claws that he never hurt Elise with, even though they looked deadly.
Kerr was a hybrid, apparently. She could see, through the horns and his white hair, as well as the white skin surrounding his red scales, that he shared ancestry with those males that were now the males of her species, but he was very different to them—smaller, lither. He walked with a grace the others didn’t possess and seemed to have the quiet, confident self-assurance of a man twice his age.
His tail whipped in lazy arcs at his feet as he patiently took in every word Elise said.
Longing filled Charlotte's heart. She wished she could believe this man, male, whatever. She swallowed. She wanted to believe him. That he was on the up and up. She couldn’t afford to. Not when Elise was so invested in him. After today, she’d be talking about him for days.
‘What colour is the sand?’ Elise asked. ‘We can’t see it from here.’
‘It’s the same shade as your skin.’ Kerr smiled at her, running a knuckle down her cheek. ‘Though not nearly as beautiful as you and your mother.’ Kerr glanced over at Charlotte, his bright green eyes catching hers, a hopeful smile on his face.
Charlotte looked away.
She wouldn’t be deceived again.
Charlotte let the sand run through her fingers. Kerr was right. It was almost exactly the same shade as her and Elise’s skin.
Kerr squatted on the sand in front of the ocean with Elise. He held a stick in both hands as he showed her a fighting style the protectorate used in battle. Adunis sticks, he’d called them.
‘Practice ones, though.’ He’d looked at Charlotte. ‘No blades.’
‘Blades?’
‘It is a weapon,’ Kerr had shrugged and walked away, taking her daughter with him.
Now, minutes later, Charlotte sat in the sand with her friends and watched him show Elise some fighting forms. This was all a part of his plan to help Elise feel safer by teaching her how to defend herself.
‘They’re adorable together,’ Willow said. ‘He obviously adores her.’
‘Does he?’ Charlotte studied them. She saw Elise slip in the sand and Kerr, dropping the blades, grabbed her before she hit the ground. He looked at Elise, examining her like something valuable he’d dropped to ensure there was no damage.
He seemed to be genuinely concerned, but Charlotte still remembered how much attention Noel had shown Charlotte.
The night they were going to make love for the first time, Elise had started to cry. Noel went off to tend to her. After a few moments, Charlotte had decided to go to the bathroom only to find Noel swearing at her daughter to ‘go the fuck back to sleep so I can screw your mom.’
She would never forget the things he’d said to her when she kicked him out. Noel was a spiteful man.
‘Charlotte?’ Willow’s face was full of concern.
‘Hmm?’
‘I really want you to be happy,’ Willow said.
‘I want you to be happy,’ Charlotte returned.
‘Okay, I’m not talking, oh, let’s all be happy,’ Willow shook her head, a hard look in her eye. ‘I mean. I want you to be happy and I think that,’ she jabbed a finger in Kerr’s direction, ‘is the man to make you happy.’
‘That’s an alien. I had my fill of them when I was lying on that table having god knows what done to me.’
‘You seriously can’t be holding our liberators responsible for the actions of Kallis.’ Willow sucked in between her lips and shook her head. ‘That’s so wrong.’
Charlotte shook her head and sighed. ‘I know. I didn’t mean it. It’s just—’
‘You’re scared.’ Willow dead-eyed her. ‘We’re all scared, girl. But this is a new world, with new rules and a new race of men, all of them looking at us like we’re the key to their future.’
Charlotte looked out across the sand, at the way Kerr focused on Elise as though she was the most important thing in the world.
If he was for real…
Her eyes scanned over him. She’d always thought he was handsome—more than handsome. There was something intensely masculine about Kerr despite him being the smallest of the towering Protectorate males. Not that he was short. He was taller than the average human man by quite a way. He was at least 6’7”.
Charlotte had forced herself to keep a distance from him in the time he’d been hanging around. He intrigued her, but Charlotte had a habit of being intrigued by assholes when she felt lost and vulnerable. There was something about a cocky grin and a confident attitude that made her feel safe and special. But, historically, when those guys got what they wanted—or didn’t—they disappeared.
Elise’s father had been the worst, though Noel was definitely a close second.
On the few occasions Charlotte had been close to him, she found her eyes were glued to the smatterings of scales on his cheeks, neck, and elsewhere. A part of her desperately wanted to see how far those scales ranged and she often found herself obsessing over how they’d feel under the sensitive pads of her fingers and… elsewhere.
Huffing out a breath, Charlotte looked back at Willow to speak, only to find her best friend’s eyes elsewhere.
Following her gaze, Charlotte couldn’t suppress the grin that came to her lips. No wonder Willow was focused. They’d never seen this Protectorate before and his skin was every bit as mottled as Willows.
He crossed the sand. His skin was mostly inky black, but there were patches of white spots here and there. His long, antelope-like horns and white hair confirmed his Protectorate ancestry.
When he reached Kerr, the two men embraced. They squatted in the sand to continue talking, all the while Elise staring at the newcomer, her dark amber eyes and her mouth round.
The newcomer was tall. Much t
aller than any of the other Protectorate, his powerful muscles moved under his close-fitting uniform as the two males spoke. After a moment, they both looked up, their eyes meeting Charlotte’s. Kerr smiled his devastating smile, and the other male nodded, recognition in his eyes before they turned to Willow.
A smile of pure delight appeared on his face. When he stood and began crossing to them, Willow froze.
‘Oh, fuck!’ Willow looked at Charlotte. ‘Oh… Shit…’
‘Cool, girl. You’re Willow, not some little child. Show him who you are.’
Willow’s ‘deer caught in headlights’ gaze faded as she took control of herself. She leaned back in the sand, winked at Charlotte, then turned to the Protectorate just as he reached them.
‘Kallis get his hands on you, too?’
The male’s grin widened and he laughed.
‘He did actually. But he didn’t like me or my brother. We’re too dark for him.’ He crouched in front of Willow, his gaze focused.
‘You weren’t the only ones.’ Willow raised an eyebrow. She held up one of her impossibly long legs, the one with the largest number of white markings. ‘Tried to rectify it though. Like my skin was a blot to be washed away.’ She raised her eyes to him, but the male was staring at her leg, his jaw slightly slack. ‘You?’
He looked up at her then, his unnaturally bright turquoise eyes meeting her black ones. ‘I was born like this,’ he said. ‘My father is one of the Protectorate. My mother is an Inadiine. My brother doesn’t have the mottling, but I was born with the markings.’
‘And they don’t bother you?’
Despite her tone, Charlotte could detect the insecurity in her words. Willow hated what Kallis had done to her. All she could see was that that alien had tried to steal the colour of her skin, skin she had, according to her telling of it, always loved. The alien had tried to steal a part of her identity. He’d planned to steal it all, according to what the Protectorate had told them. To steal their minds and their memories and use them for his own purpose.
‘No,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘But children are so precious to us. Every child is a gift. No one cared about the markings, and they’ve always just been a part of me. A part of my story.’
‘… children are so precious to us…’
Charlotte looked at Kerr and Elise. Could he be for real?
Unexpectedly, catching her off-guard and scaring her to her core, Charlotte felt hope bloom.
‘I’m going to test this “children are precious” thing,’ Willow said a few minutes later. The Protectorate, Dak, had gone back to Kerr, but he and Willow were eye-fucking each other almost constantly.
‘Why?’
‘Do you think I can live with that daughter of yours and not want my own?’ Willow frowned down at her even as she rose to her feet. ‘That man,’ she moved her head a fraction towards Dak, ‘is sex on legs. Sex on very long legs, and I’m not into casual relationships. Can I take Elise for a walk?’
Charlotte shook her head, grinning. ‘Of course you can. Just don’t get so caught up in Dak that you forget about my daughter.’
‘Of course not,’ Willow said, throwing her an annoyed look before she turned and marched over to Kerr and Elise.
‘You’ve had Elise all day. I want a turn!’ she shouted.
Charlotte watched as the group exchanged words. Then she, Elise, and Dak set off, walking up the beach and away from Kerr, who, suddenly alone, turned his gaze to Charlotte.
‘Oh, fuck!’ She clenched her jaw. She hadn’t considered this outcome.
With a disappointed look, Kerr turned away and Charlotte felt it like a knife in her gut.
‘Goddammit,’ she whispered before standing up. She walked towards the alien.
‘Kerr,’ she called when she got close enough.
He turned, a guarded look on his face.
‘Wanna go for a walk?’
A smirk appeared on his face, and Charlotte felt her treacherous heart give a leap of joy. She gestured her head down the beach, away from the direction Willow had taken.
Her eyes moved up the beach to the spot the others had taken when they arrived. Willow had dragged Charlotte away, and when Kerr took Elise, they’d naturally gravitated towards her daughter. Now Charlotte realised Willow had taken her to talk about Kerr.
As he raced to reach her and fell into step, Charlotte took a moment to acknowledge that there was something there. Something she couldn’t didn’t want to run away from. She just wasn’t sure how to trust a man again. Not after Stephen and definitely not after Noel.
They walked in silence towards the rest of the ladies, who stilled and stared with wide eyes and smirks as they passed.
‘Ladies,’ Charlotte nodded in acknowledgement.
A few feet up the beach, the laughing began. Charlotte felt herself become tense, but she knew they only wanted the best for her. Willow wasn’t the only one trying to encourage Charlotte to give the devil a chance.
They continued on in silence for a short while. Charlotte was trying her best to relax but finding it difficult.
‘How are you finding the facility?’ Kerr’s voice was smooth and deep with a rumbling bass.
‘I hate it,’ Charlotte admitted. ‘I love the ladies there, but,’ she sighed, ‘I need to make a home for my daughter now.’
Charlotte looked over her shoulder, searching far down the beach for Elise. She was walking hand in hand with both Willow and Dak. A moment passed, and they swung her between them. They were too far for Charlotte to hear Elise’s screams and laughter, but she could feel them, followed by the cry of, ‘Again, again!’
When she turned to Kerr, he was watching her intently. A smile touched his lips, his face, his eyes soft with affection.
‘What?’
Kerr’s smile deepened. ‘I love watching you with her,’ he said. Then, ‘You’ll have a home soon. They’re preparing them now.’
‘Yeah, in a city. I’m sure it’s beautiful there, but I lived in cities my whole life and always hated it.’
‘I’m sorry to hear that. What are Earth cities like?’
‘Old. Dirty. Full. You can’t go anywhere without it being crowded with people. Can’t move, can’t breathe. There’s no space. It feels like you’re boxed in on all sides, but you’re all alone at the same time. Earth lost any semblance of community a long time ago. Now they’re all just united in their hatred of aliens.’
Charlotte’s statement was followed by deafening silence. She sounded defeated, she realised. Even if Kerr was for real now, how long would that last when she was like this?
‘We were moving to Mars,’ Charlotte said quickly, not wanting Kerr to get the wrong impression of her. ‘Earth spends most of their money on the military machine to defend the system, but they also have incentives for people wanting to emigrate.’ She glanced over at the alien. His green eyes were fixed on her, a contemplative look on his face. ‘I found a job and a sponsor. They helped me get a small apartment in Demeter city, and I registered Elise in a school there.’
‘Then a slave ship took your transport?’
Charlotte nodded. ‘They got forty-seven of us, then sold us all to Kallis.’ She was whispering by the time she got to the scientist's name. She almost felt as though saying it out loud would call him to her. ‘Willow was on the same shuttle. We saw each other, but we didn’t meet till we woke up here.’
‘Why are you telling me this, Charlotte?’ Kerr stopped walking, and Charlotte turned to face him. ‘I mean, I want to know. I want to know everything about you. But you seem to be nervous.’
‘I just…’ Charlotte sighed. ‘It’s just that you keep coming back after I told you to stay away. I can’t have another man in my life who’s going to abandon us. I can’t have that, and I won’t have it for Elise. She loves you. So if you’re not one hundred per cent with whatever this seems to want to become, then you need to leave now.’
Charlotte realised her words were harsher than she’d meant. You’re fucking
this up, girl!
‘But,’ she let out a long, fearful breath, ‘if you’re in, you need to just give me a little time, and I’ll work on trusting you.’
Kerr smiled, stepping closer to her. Charlotte found herself putting her hand on his chest, part-barrier, part-touch. ‘I’ll give you reasons to trust me,’ he said.
God, this man is tall!
He felt like a barrier between her and the world. But unlike her experiences with Stephen, there was nothing controlling behind it. It was a protective barrier, and for a moment, she allowed herself to feel safe.
‘That’s not how trust works,’ she smiled at him. His own grin widened in response. ‘You can give me every reason in the world, but the trust has to come from me.’
Kerr reached out, stroking a finger down her face. ‘I understand,’ he said. He seemed to get closer, and Charlotte found her gaze fixed on his lips. When she forced her eyes up to his, he was staring at her lips. He bent, slowly, and Charlotte found herself reaching up on her toes.
A noise behind them broke the spell.
Turning, Charlotte saw half a dozen heads suddenly turning to stare out at the sea.
Three days had passed since she and Kerr almost kissed on the beach and she hadn’t seen him since.
‘I’ll give you reasons to trust me.’
‘Hah!’ Yet again, she’d been let down by a man.
It was early afternoon, and Elise was eating at the table while Charlotte cleaned up. They hadn’t been out to the pool today. They had ‘therapy’, though bless Tevin, he wasn’t very good at it. Therapy wasn’t something the Tessans had ever considered before suddenly needing to acclimatise thousands of humans—or whatever they were—to their world. Mostly they talked, and Charlotte led the way, trying to document, if nothing else, everything that had been done to her at that sadist bastards hands.
‘Mommy, I don’t like this,’ Elise said in a small voice.
Charlotte looked at her plate and saw Elise had eaten everything but a strange purple vegetable. What was it called again? Tabin root!
It had a nutty flavour that wasn’t altogether unpleasant.