Hunter caught my eye and tapped his headphones. I yanked my own off and looked up at the cabin-crew member.
‘I’m sorry. I was just… talking to myself.’
Ugh.
The woman nodded at me. ‘Very good, madam. Please don’t hesitate to call one of the crew if you need anything.’ She smiled and began walking away.
I pulled my headphones back on, making a point of not looking at Hunter, Instead, I scooched over onto my side, putting my back towards him. I’d slept fitfully last night after he’d left and it was already catching up with me. The comfy full recline of the seat beckoned and I lay back, pulling the warm blanket over me. Hunter didn’t want my concern. He’d been pretty damn clear on that. So I needed to find a way to box it up and put it away, just like I’d done with everything else I’d once felt for him. I swapped the headphones for earplugs and burrowed down into the pillow, determined that, when I woke, I’d be back in charge and following his advice of just letting it go. Even if he clearly wasn’t able to do that himself.
***
We’d spent a day settling in to our hotel and taking advantage of the gym (more Hunter) and the buffet (more me), among other aspects. It had a stunning pool and I’d been happily bobbing around in it for the last hour on a lilo chair, chatting to Liv as she sat on an identical one next to me, our feet trailing in the water, our faces and shoulders shaded by hats and sunglasses. Sandeep was sitting under a beach cabana, Kindle propped on his knees, catching up on some reading. Hunter had now joined us – or rather Sandy – and was sitting sideways on the lounger next to him. He’d glanced towards the pool as he’d wandered up, raising a hand as Liv waved to him. His eyes were hidden by the classic Aviators and, unlike Sandeep, and most of the other guests lounging around the pool, he chose to keep his T-shirt on, even though I would have put money on him having the best body out here. Liv and I sat in our inflatables, drifting around on the slight breeze that teased the edges of our hats and caused the faintest of ripples on the surface of the water. Occasionally our chairs would bump into each other and at other times one of us would grab the other as she started drifting too far away for a polite level of conversation to take place.
‘So, the dress is all ready? Back home I mean?’ I asked as Liv bumped my lilo and paddled lazily round to face me a little more.
‘Yes. Obviously, there’ll be some last-minute adjustments, just to make sure everything is perfect. The bridesmaids are all going for a fitting this week so I’ve asked to be kept informed as to how that goes. I’m hoping there won’t be anything drastic but I’d rather know now than find out when we get back with only a few days left to the wedding!’
‘That seems a sensible plan. But I’m sure there’ll be nothing to concern you anyway. You said they’d already had some fittings, didn’t you?’
‘Yes. But a couple have gone on diets – I’ve no idea what for. They have great figures as it is, but you know, there’s no telling some people.’
I gave a head bob of concession and took a sip from my mocktail.
‘The venue has been great, keeping me informed of everything, and they just sent me some photos of the most recent wedding they had there, to show they’re still up to scratch, I suppose, or something like that. It’s such a competitive market, I guess. Obviously, the colour scheme was different and we’re having Christmas trees as decoration, and fairy lights and baubles for more of a festive feel, but I thought it was a nice touch for them to do that.’
‘It was. So, basically, everything is pretty much all ready?’
‘Unless there’s anything horribly vital I’ve forgotten!’
I put my hand on her arm, warm from the sun. ‘There isn’t. I’m sure of it.’
She smiled under the shade of her hat and covered my hand. ‘Thanks.’ She took a sip of her real cocktail. ‘It feels a bit weird talking about snow and Christmas and a winter wedding while we’re sitting in bikinis bobbing about in a pool in the Florida sun, doesn’t it?’
‘It does a bit. But don’t worry. We’ll all be freezing out butts off again soon enough and it will all feel very real indeed!’
Liv grinned. ‘I’m so excited! I don’t want this trip to be over – we’re having such a fabulous time. But I can’t wait for the wedding either.’
‘Perfectly understandable. And just the way it should be, I think.’
‘Sandy’s super-excited too. He’s just a lot better at hiding it in public than me.’
I laughed, bouncing off a corner of Liv’s lilo chair as she lazily stretched out a tanned arm and pulled me back beside her.
As we lounged, talking about this and that and nothing in particular, a woman who’d been sunbathing at the far end of the pool stretched elegantly, and very noticeably, before sitting up and slipping on a pair of Manolo heeled mules. She stood, her tanned and toned body grabbing attention from various directions – including mine. The high-cut bikini bottom was then covered by a citrus-yellow sarong, which she tied casually around her hips. I say covered. The sarong was about the same size as a men’s large handkerchief and pretty much sheer so it was definitely more for show than purpose. But if show was the purpose, it was doing its job spectacularly.
Liv tipped her head towards me. ‘This should be interesting.’
‘What?’
‘Watch.’ She slid her Chanel glasses down her nose a touch and glanced at the woman before pushing them back up again.
I frowned behind my own oversized Boots-own-brand sunglasses and waited.
The woman tossed her hair as she hooked her designer bag over her shoulder. Its gold clasps caught the sun, sending flashes across the pool. She began walking back towards the hotel, but instead of taking the path that led directly back in, she opted to walk poolside, her hips swaying softly, the breeze rippling the sarong as she walked. Unlike most people, she kept her sunglasses up on top of her head. And it was pretty obvious why. Hunter was still sitting sideways on the lounger, his arms resting loosely on his thighs as he chatted to his friend. I couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen her – Hunter had never been one to gawp at other women when we were together but he was single now and he’d most definitely been singled out. The woman kept her eyes unshaded in order for him to see exactly where her focus was trained. On him. When his head turned briefly, she shot him a wide, confident smile.
‘Hi there.’ The smile stayed as she spoke, her pace slowing a little.
I saw Sandy look out to Liv and his eyebrows waggled a couple of times above his sunglasses as he grinned at her. She lifted the cocktail out of the holder on her chair and held it up in a cheers motion to him, making sure her fingers were specifically placed in a message as she did so. His grin got wider and he rubbed a hand over his mouth to hide it.
Hunter smiled back at the woman, returned the greeting politely and then turned back to Sandy, picking up the conversation they had briefly dropped. Sandy shifted on the lounger, clearly surprised to once more be the focus of Hunter’s attention so soon. The woman looked at Hunter, then at Sandeep, her smile in place but a little less bright and a little more fixed as she picked up her pace and sashayed on into the hotel, a flash of bright yellow disappearing behind smoked glass as she stepped through the doors.
‘Well… wonders will never cease,’ Liv murmured.
‘Do you think it’s a nationality thing?’
‘Huh?’ Liv was staring at Hunter. At my question, she pulled her attention back to me.
‘That woman. I mean, obviously she was hitting on Hunter – but she was so confident about it. I just wondered if you thought it was a nationality thing – she didn’t sound British – or if it’s just that she knows she looks hot as… you know… Or if it’s just some other sort of inner belief. I mean, I can do presentations and speak to pretty much anyone for work but I could never be that confident in the same situation.’
Liv downed the remains of her cocktail, motioned for me to do the same with my mocktail and then waved the glass at a passing waiter, ind
icating one more of each.
‘You totally should, though.’
I laughed. ‘I couldn’t! For God’s sake, I have dusters bigger than that sarong for a start. I’d be lucky if it covered one bum cheek, let alone two!’
‘I don’t think covering up is what that was about. It’s all about illusion. Can I ask you something?’
‘Sure.’
Liv and I were now paddling with our hands, as we steered our way to the shallow end and a safe depth to disembark without risk of losing our specs or ruining our straw hats. We slid off the chairs and stepped out of the pool, heading back to the cabana.
‘It really doesn’t bother you?’
‘What?’
‘That woman clearly hitting on Hunter. And you two were… or are…’
‘Oh! No. Past tense only. Definitely not “are”.’
‘Oh…’ Liv slowed her pace so she could finish her thought. ‘It’s just that you two disappeared part way through the fireworks at the party and we thought maybe…’ She left it unfinished.
I gave her a smile. ‘No. We did leave early but only because Hunter was…’
Liv pushed her sunglasses up, her hat now in her hand. She was waiting for me to finish.
‘Hunter was what?’
Ummm…
‘Coming down with a migraine. I had some tablets in my room so we just went to get away from the noise a bit. Nothing more exciting than that, I’m afraid.’
Liv gave a cute little head tilt that really worked for her. ‘Ohhh. We thought maybe the romance of India had worked its magic on you two.’
‘That would be a big nope. Which is exactly how it should be,’ I added, seeing another thought forming in Liv’s brain.
‘So it doesn’t bother you when he gets hit on?’
‘He’s really nothing to do with me now. And it’s bound to happen, isn’t it? He’s not exactly had many dealings with the ugly tree.’
‘True. And believe me, it does. Often!’
‘Right,’ I said, not knowing exactly what response to give to that but somehow feeling one was expected.
‘But that’s the first time I can remember, when he’s been single, that he hasn’t followed it up. I mean, she was super-hot, wasn’t she?’
‘She was.’
‘That’s why I thought maybe…’
I pulled off my glasses and laughed. ‘Definitely no. You saw her, right? And you’ve seen me, right?’
‘You’re gorgeous. And you’re funny, and talented too.’
‘I’m also not seventeen feet tall with the perfect body and artfully styled hair. Not to mention she’s probably something terribly important and virtuous like a paediatric surgeon or human rights lawyer. Seriously. I am so not the reason why he didn’t follow up. And who’s to say he won’t later?’
‘I think you’re underestimating yourself. And him.’
‘Liv,’ I said, stopping her for a moment as we were now approaching the cabana where the men were sitting, ‘we didn’t exactly have an amicable break-up. We have different ideas about things and they’re not things you can get around. Us getting back together isn’t a possibility.’
‘Does that upset you?’
I smiled. ‘No. Whatever happened, I want him to be happy and I’m not the person who can do that for him. Or him for me.’
Although, oh my God, he’d had the ability to make me unbelievably happy when he wanted to.
Olivia gave me a quick hug and then squinted at me. ‘We should get you in the shade. You’re flushing a bit.’
‘Oh… really?’ I pulled my hat off and flapped it to and fro as we entered the little hut.
Sandeep immediately got up, pulled a towel from the pile beside him and stepped forward to drape it lovingly around Liv’s shoulders, delivering it with a soft kiss. Which was all delightful and sweet, except they were now completely blocking me from the pile of towels. I stood there dripping for a moment, and tried to pretend I wasn’t seriously thinking of launching myself over both of them in order to get myself wrapped up as soon as possible.
The white frilled bikini I was wearing was one Lorelei had persuaded me to buy and was consequently far more daring than the basic black one-piece numbers I’d always bought before. It showed way more cheek than I would ever willingly have chosen to and had a push-up bra that definitely didn’t hold back on its agenda. When I’d explained to Lorelei that it was a whole lot more flesh on show than I was used to, she’d looked at me like I’d spoken Venutian. So I’d nodded and bought the thing just so we could finally go and get some lunch before burying the purchase in a drawer at home. It had been bought purely for a quiet life, never to be worn. I knew for a fact I had actually packed two of the aforementioned basic black numbers instead. I also now knew that my reply at the airport to the question “Have you packed your case yourself?” was apparently only partly true. I’d forgotten I even owned this damned thing until I was due to meet Liv by the pool and, upon emptying my suitcase, had discovered the only swimsuit I had with me was something I’d never willingly have chosen to wear! I’d grabbed my phone and pulled up WhatsApp, sending Lorelei the simple message:
I am going to kill you.
A cross-eyed pokey tongue face came back. I’m guessing it was finally time for a swim…? You’re welcome.
And now here I was, standing in said bikini in front of my ex while our clients snuggled adorably. I shuffled around a couple of times to try and nonchalantly reach the cabana hut’s towel bale. Unsuccessfully. I chewed my mouth for a moment and tried to be all casual and patient for love. Also unsuccessfully. I shifted my weight and attempted to stop the breeze flapping up the frill that half covered my backside. As I did so, Hunter’s head came up from where he’d been looking at his phone while Sandeep did his romantic fiancé bit. His eyes were still hiding behind the Aviators so I couldn’t tell exactly where he was looking. Which was probably just as well. His head turned towards me, cocking briefly to the side at Liv and Sandy with a half-smile. I flapped my hand and pulled an “oh gosh, these lovebirds” kind of face, casually hugging my hat to me, feeling incredibly self-conscious and ridiculous in a bikini I wouldn’t have bought in a million years if it had been entirely up to me.
Hunter stood and, stepping up onto Sandeep’s lounger with one foot, used his height and long arms to reach over the couple, who were still engrossed in one another, to grab a towel. As he stepped back down, he held it out to me.
‘I’m guessing you’re waiting for this?’
‘Thank you!’ I gushed, a little bit too enthusiastically.
Hunter tilted his head momentarily, opened his mouth to say something, but then apparently changed his mind.
‘What?’
‘Never mind. If you’re staying out here, put some more suncream on. You’ll only burn otherwise.’
‘Yes. I know. Thank you. And hello, I’m in the shade.’
‘Just saying.’ He held his hands out as he shuffled his bum back on a lounger, his feet still hanging off the end.
I took a deep breath, knowing he meant well. ‘Which I appreciate. But I am quite capable of looking after myself.’
‘I wasn’t suggesting otherwise.’
‘Right.’
He shook his head as he leant over, grabbing a National Geographic from his rucksack.
‘What?’
‘You. You’re just impossible. Stop being so bloody defensive all the time.’ Our voices were low, although Sandy and Liv were now sitting together on the end lounger furthest away from us and I think the only thing we could have done that might have distracted them was the one thing I could guarantee wouldn’t happen.
‘I’m not being defensive. I just don’t need you nannying me all the time!’
‘I’m not!’
‘You are! You don’t even know you’re doing it!’
‘It’s called looking out for someone, Mia. You should try it.’
‘That’s unfair!’ I said, tears unexpectedly pricking my eyes. I shoved m
y sunglasses back on so he wouldn’t see. ‘So you’re telling me if you were here with some two-hundred-pound guy, you’d be reminding him to put on sun lotion too?’
‘If he was fair skinned and wearing a sexy little white bikini, then yeah, I would. Most definitely.’
I glared at him as I sat on the next lounger and tried not to let that smile of his have any effect.
‘You’re hilarious.’
‘You’re a pain in the arse. We all have our crosses to bear.’
I pulled my book up to my nose and pointedly ignored him.
Chapter Twelve
The next morning was bright and warm but without the sticky heat Florida offered in its summer months. I was standing on the banks of an inlet, in the shade of a clump of palms, watching in awe as manatees unhurriedly swam past, breaking the surface every now and then, their gentle faces making me smile every time I saw them.
‘Aren’t they adorable?’ Liv said, as she came and stood next to me, all kitted out and ready for kayaking in shorts and a T-shirt, a compact life jacket dangling from one very recently manicured finger.
‘Amazing,’ I replied, unable to keep the smile off my face or out of my voice.
Olivia gave me a squeeze. ‘Oh, I’m so glad you decided to take this job. I knew I loved your writing but I didn’t know if you’d be up for all the activities too. But when Dad said you were just as excited about it all as we were, oh, I was so thrilled! He told us you weren’t terribly experienced at doing many of the things but knew you’d just take it all in your stride. He’s so proud of you, you know. He called you his most capable employee.’
‘Oh! Wow. Yes! I’m… yes, really excited. Really! And that’s so… nice of him to say that.’
Liv bounced on the spot a couple of times in excitement and I did the same, partly because she had hold of my arms and I had little choice.
‘Ooh! Sandy! Selfie time, come on!’ She waved to him and pointed to the edge of the water a little further along where a group of manatees were congregating.
Hunter gave a little shake of his head as they passed him. ‘If you’re going to insist on doing selfies, tell me again why I’m here?’
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