Thanks for letting me steal Kenzie today! We had a great time shopping! –Cara
I keep scrolling through the pictures Cara sent me again on the way back, unable to stop myself from looking at them. I chuckle at a few; I can see the obvious distaste for the outfits in Kenzie’s face as she poses for Cara. By the end, though, she looks like she is having a good time, and there’s even a picture of her and Cara posing together, that I can only assume Hunter or Ben took.
I’m about to put my phone away, when a picture catches my attention. Kenzie is dressed in a long off-white floor length gown that looks absolutely amazing on her. When I see that picture, suddenly everything becomes clear, and I start to formulate a plan. The moment I get back to the condo, I head into my office and start researching everything I need so I can be certain this is a viable option. I don’t know why I didn’t consider this before, but it’s perfect! This will get the press off my back and more importantly, should prove to my employees that they can have confidence in me and that my personal life will not affect my business decisions.
It takes a couple of hours, but I finally manage to put everything together that I think I need. I’ve texted Kenzie, now that I have her cell phone number, and she has agreed to come to my apartment so we can talk. As the time gets closer to Kenzie arriving, I find myself incredibly nervous at the thought of presenting everything to Kenzie. I don’t know how she’s going to feel about a new arrangement, especially one that is this significantly different from what we currently have.
“Mr. Parker, Ms. Rose has arrived,” Carter alerts me just before Kenzie steps into my office.
“Thank you, please come in, Kenzie,” I gesture for her to take a seat in one of the chairs in front of my desk. It’s obvious that she changed after she came back from shopping and was probably relaxing when I texted her. Now she is wearing a pair of tight, black pants with a just as tight light blue shirt that brings out her eyes. The shirt hugs her breasts while the pants highlight her ass. I immediately think back to our kiss the other the night outside her apartment and how it felt to have that beautiful body pressed against mine. I quickly shake my head and walk around the desk taking the seat next to Kenzie.
“Kenzie… we need to talk.”
“Okay…” I can tell by her voice that I’ve caught her off guard.
“I… I…” FUCK this is so much harder than I thought it would be. I need Kenzie to agree to this; I need Kenzie period. Without her, this won’t work, and I could lose everything. “I… I think we need to end our contract with Bridget.”
“Oh,” she immediately looks at the floor, no longer making eye contact with me. I’m trying to figure out the perfect way to say what I want to next, having completely forgotten everything I had previously prepared. “I… I’m sorry you feel that way, Nicholas. I guess I’ll see myself out.”
“What? No, wait, Kenzie!” I quickly grasp her wrist in mine before she has a chance to move more than a couple of feet from me. “I didn’t mean it like that; it came out wrong. Please sit back down.”
“So, you don’t want to end our contract with Bridget?” she asks cautiously sitting on the edge of the chair where she sat comfortably only a few minutes ago. I move my hand from her wrist, that I realized I was still grasping, down to her hand while I try to figure out the right wording for what I need to say next. All afternoon I thought about this moment—I planned exactly what to say, but now my mind is a complete clusterfuck.
“I do want to end our contract with Bridget, but…” I can command an entire board room of strangers, yet as I sit in my office before Kenzie, I’m a fucking, nervous wreck. I don’t recall ever being this nervous before—I’ve never had so much at stake as I do right now. “I’d like to propose a different arrangement; one that is just between us. Bridget would no longer be involved.”
“A different arrangement?”
“Yes… I’d like for us to get married—“
“Married!?!?!”
Chapter 2
Kenzie
“Married!?!?!”
Please tell me I didn’t just hear him correctly: that he did not just tell me he thinks we should get married! What the hell is he thinking? Why does he think this is a good idea? Where is this coming from?
I have so many questions, yet I can’t seem to voice any of them; I’m absolutely speechless. There are so many thoughts going through my head right now that they don’t even make sense to me. I don’t know how I could tell him what I’m thinking or how I feel right now. I’ve gone from expecting him to offer me payment for spending the day with his sister, to thinking he wanted to end our contract with Bridget because I had done something wrong, to now thinking he is absolutely crazy.
“You think we should get married?” I repeat the only words that come to my mind clearly.
“Fuck, this came out completely wrong. I had this planned differently,” he lets go of my hand, which I hadn’t even realized he was holding until now, and runs his hands through his hair. “I know this sounds crazy, Kenzie—“
“Um… yeah, it does.”
“I told you before that I think of you beyond the contract we signed with Bridget. In the few months we’ve been under contract, I’ve come to enjoy our time together. It’s no longer a chore to attend the different events; I no longer mind it as much, because you’re there with me. I enjoy spending time with you, and I’ve come to think of you as a friend—“
“As I have you, but I don’t think that means we should get married—“
“Kenzie, I’m in a bind and I need your help. I know this is an incredible thing to ask of you—“
“You’re in a bind?”
“All the negative publicity that I’ve been experiencing lately is beginning to affect my employees. PFS just conducted their routine employee satisfaction survey and it was determined that my employees’ confidence level in me is at an all-time low—“
“Oh, I’m sorry. Do you really think it’s because of the press? I mean, isn’t it possible—“
“The survey asked employees to cite the reason for their low confidence, and the negative press was the only reason cited. Until now, my employees’ confidence level in me, in the decisions I make, and in PFS as a whole has always been excellent. There has never been a question about my ability. Now, because of the press though, their image of me has changed. They no longer have confidence in me.”
“Surely there’s something else that can be done?”
“The press won’t leave me alone—you’ve seen it. I’m desperately trying to find out who is feeding the press all of this negative information about me, but until we figure that out, I can’t sit back and watch my company fall apart. If my employees don’t have confidence in me, they will leave PFS. Up until now, we have had incredibly low turnover; turnover so low that we use it as a marketing technique when we present proposals to perspective companies. If PFS suddenly experiences high turnover combined with the negative press… I… I’m afraid I could lose everything. It’s not just me I’m worried about it, it’s my employees, my clients…”
“And you think getting married is the solution?”
“Yes,” he sighs and shakes his head almost as if he is in disbelief himself. “The press would have to leave me alone as there would no longer be anything to write about. They wouldn’t be able to question my ability to stay faithful or suggest reasons why women seem to run from me.”
“But why me?” I need to know the reason he is suggesting this with me isn’t just because we have this established history with Bridget. I don’t know why, but I need to know that he isn’t suggesting this with me because the press has already linked us together. What surprises me is that I haven’t walked out yet—I haven’t told him he is out of his mind and left his apartment.
“I’ve never even considered letting another woman into my space, into my apartment, yet with you I no longer feel threatened. You are different than any other woman I’ve ever met, Kenzie; you’re the only one who looks
at me and doesn’t see my bank account balance.”
“Nicholas—“
“This isn’t just because of our arrangement with Bridget; I knew you were different from that day on the sidewalk,” he interrupts me before I can say anything. “When you tried to refuse my offer to replace your outfit after we ruined it; I knew you were different. Obviously I’ve gotten to know you a lot better since then… and I… I care for you. There is no one else I would even consider proposing this arrangement with.”
“I don’t know what to think.”
“I know you probably imagined getting married for love—“
“Actually, I never thought I would get married, for love or otherwise. Not after…”
“I would never hurt you and I will never try to control you the way he did,” Nicholas obviously understands why I thought I would never consider marriage again. “This wouldn’t be like that, I swear.”
“What would it be like?” I can’t believe I’m sitting here actually considering this crazy scheme that he is proposing.
“Honestly, I don’t think it would be very different than our current arrangement,” did he really just say that? “Well… I mean there would be some obvious differences. You would need to move in here, of course, since it would look odd that we were married and living in separate apartments. You would have your own bedroom and any other space you needed. I would continue to cover all of your clothing expenses of course…”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I know this is a lot to take in.” Well that’s an understatement. “If there were any other way...”
“You can’t go after the press? Sue them or something?”
“According to my legal team, no one has breached the definition of slander yet. We have had stories retracted but unfortunately once the story is out there, people already know about it, so retraction does very little. If it was just one reporter, I could go after them; I could make it so they never work in the industry again. Unfortunately, it’s more than one… it’s actually quite a few different reporters publishing the stories or raising the questions about personal life. My lawyers say because they aren’t publishing facts, but simply raising questions, that we can’t do anything yet. I have a feeling someone is pushing things to be published about me, but I can’t prove it.”
“Do you think it’s—“
“I don’t know. We are exploring that option, but she currently isn’t even in the state, however, that doesn’t mean we aren’t watching her.”
“I… I think I need some time to think about this, Nicholas. This is a lot to take in.”
“Of course. I have prepared some documents for you to review—“
“Documents?”
“If you were to agree to this arrangement, we would both need to sign a prenup, which I’ve printed for you. You can have a lawyer review it of course, but it basically says that you are not entitled to the normal 50% split of assets and property—“
“No, of course, I wouldn’t—“
“However, unlike most prenups, this one further outlines what you will receive upon the dissolve of our marriage.”
“What I would receive?”
“If you were to agree to this arrangement, and we remained married until the time it was mutually agreed upon that we dissolve our marriage, you will receive the deed to the condo you are currently staying in—“
“Wait,” I need to process what he just said. “If I agree to this arrangement, you’re going to give me the apartment?”
“Yes. The deed will be put in your name the day we are married, and held until our divorce, at which time, it will be provided to you. The condo would be yours with no strings attached. Whether you choose to live there, or to sell it and move somewhere else, that would be up to you.”
“Why would you give it to me?”
“Kenzie, I know what I’m asking is a lot; it’s only fair that you receive something in return for helping me. I don’t want you to have to worry about finding a place to live or being able to afford a place that you want when this is all over—“
“I don’t know—“
“It’s the least I could do. I’m asking you to give up so much for me if you agree to this. You would be helping me save my company—I can’t not give you something in return, it wouldn’t be right. If you were to agree to this arrangement, I would also cover your education expenses, if you chose to return to school—“
“You would pay my tuition?”
“If you agree to this arrangement, yes, I would cover the tuition, books and any other expenses for you to return to school to pursue anything you want.”
“Nicholas, I don’t know how I feel about this.”
“You would be doing so much for me by agreeing to this arrangement… I wouldn’t want you to do this and expect nothing in return. This isn’t like when you stayed with me for the weekend because I was sick, Kenzie, this is so much more than that—“
“I know that—“
“I need to give you something in return; I can’t ask you to do this for me and not give you something in return. I can’t… I won’t take advantage of you like that.”
“I… I think I need some time to process all of this.”
“I understand. Please take as much time as you need.”
I can almost see the mask that Nicholas puts on as he takes on his CEO persona; he really is a different person when it comes to business. He was like that when we first met to discuss the arrangement through Bridget and of course, I’ve seen it at several of the business events we have attended together. Then there’s also the other side of him: the one that not too many people get to see. Tonight, as he was discussing how this affects his business, I got to see that person again. However, the mask went right back on when I wasn’t able to give him an answer right away. I don’t know if he expected an answer tonight; I would think he would have known I would need time to process everything.
“Would you like to stay for dinner?”
“No, thank you for the offer. I think I’m going to go back to the apartment and… think.”
“Kenzie… I really want this to work. If there’s something in the paperwork you don’t like, I’ll change it. If you want something more, I’ll give it to you. I know what I’m asking is… life changing, but I’ll do whatever…”
“Just give me some time, please.”
“Of course; I’ll walk you out,” and with that the mask is back on.
“Good night, Nicholas.”
“Night.”
For the first time I think we started the arrangement with Bridget, Nicholas doesn’t kiss me good night when I leave this apartment. I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t want to; the look in his eyes told me he did. I think maybe he was worried it would change how I thought about what he is proposing. As soon as I enter my apartment, I sit down and try to process everything that just happened. I try to make sense of the proposal and how I even feel about what he is suggesting.
I sigh and pull out the prenup agreement he gave me; as he indicated, the agreement outlines what I will receive when the marriage is dissolved, namely the condo I am currently staying in. I’m surprised to learn that Nicholas is not only proposing to cover my school expenses while we are married, but that he will continue to cover them for up to four years following our divorce. While I’m still not sure how I feel about the idea of him paying my bills, I’m kind of touched that he included the clause that he would continue covering the fees after our divorce, as it would ensure I was able to finish any degree I decided to pursue. It’s little things like that which make me realize that Nicholas does care for me more than a contract or business arrangement.
I think about how much my life has changed since I stepped off the plane in New York a couple of years ago. I had nothing but a small duffel bag and a few dollars in my pocket when I arrived here. I had no idea what to expect; all I knew was that I needed to start over. When I met with the case worker at the shelter in Denver, s
he asked me if I could go anywhere where would I go? I looked at the map on her wall, and my eyes just sort of fell on New York. My goal at that time was simple: survive.
I knew I had serious trust issues after what he did to me and because of that marriage was never a consideration for me. Unlike most women my age, I had no desire to date, fall in love, get married and start popping out kids. I could never see myself living with a man again; I vowed never to trust someone like that ever again. I vowed never to put myself in a position to be hurt like he hurt me again.
Yet, here I sit actually contemplating agreeing to marry a man; a man that I’ve only known for three months. I can’t help but think about how things changed with him; we moved in together very quickly, really without even knowing each other. I was blinded by the idea that someone was showing me affection, and I was desperate to get out of the house I lived in. Looking back, the signs were there, but I ignored them. When he took me out on a date, he always insisted on ordering for me and planning every detail of the date. When I moved in with him, everything had to be absolutely perfect in the house. The cup handles all had to face a certain way in the cabinets, cans in the pantry had to face with labels facing forward—even the bottles of liquor had to be organized in a specific way. At first, I just chalked it up to a quirk of his; one that I was willing to deal with because I was finally out of that house. Looking back now, I should have realized those were signs of his need to control everything.
If I didn’t think I knew Nicholas as well as I do, I wouldn’t even be considering this arrangement. I don’t think for a second that Nicholas would ever hurt me the way he did, but I can’t help but question my own ability to read people after the decisions I’ve made in the past. I quickly decide that if I’m going to agree to this new arrangement, I’m going to need to have an out in the off chance that I can’t trust my instincts with Nicholas. I won’t be forced to make a decision between having a roof over my head and being safe.
On Her Terms (The Arrangement Duet Book 2) Page 2