by Lacey Silks
“What? Why didn’t you say anything at the gala? Why didn’t he?”
“I think it will make more sense once I tell you everything. Chloe knew him as well. In fact, she dated him just before she left home.”
“I have a feeling this is the good news.”
“Well, you’re right. Axel, you better brace yourself for what you’re about to hear.” I paused. “It’s not pretty.”
After a long breath in and out, he nodded. I went on to tell him about what had happened that night in the basement. It wasn’t easy. I watched his face twist in pain as the words sank in. The mother of his child had been hurt and degraded, and he’d never known about it. She left her entire life behind because of Jack and disappeared for two years. I told Axel about how I blamed myself for the incident, and then just as we were reunited, I’d swerved on the way home and Chloe lost her life. Axel kept shaking his head. His fists were clenched, and if he tugged on his hair any harder he’d rip it out.
He finally shot off his chair, rage rolling off his body like a determined bulldozer. “That fucker!” He clenched his fist looking for something to hit. When he got close to the wall, he eyed it before swinging his arm forward, but as soon as Trevor’s laughter sounded from the outside, he stopped inches from the wall. His whole body shook, and Axel looked ready to rip apart anything that stood in his way. I’d never seen him this enraged. He whipped his body around, pain in his eyes throbbing like flesh beneath sharp daggers.
“Damn it!”
I jolted in my chair. I almost didn’t recognize this normally calm man as he dealt with the agony. Axel came back my way and knelt in front of me.
“Did he hurt you as well?”
“No,” I whispered.
He lowered his head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
I got off the chaise and knelt on the carpet, right in front of him. I took his hands into mine and lifted his chin. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know he’d—”
“You’re sorry? You shouldn’t be, Trish. This isn’t your fault.”
“I… I led her to that basement.”
“Yes, and I’m sure you knew what was waiting for her there.” The sarcasm in his voice made me recoil. I’d thought I was strong enough to deal with the past, but perhaps I’d been mistaken.
“Fuck! Trish, I’m sorry. It’s just all these years, I didn’t know how hurt she was. I mean, I knew she had issues, but I didn’t know they were that deep. She’d never talk about her past, no matter how much I insisted, and then Chloe got pregnant, so nothing else really mattered and… I don’t mean to take it out on you.”
“But you can.” I looked up into his pained eyes. “I’m here for you. I’m here for whatever you need.”
He shook his head. “No, I’m not going to use you like that. You deserve better.”
I took his hand into mine and guided him up toward the chaise.
“Did Chloe ever say anything about her family?” I asked.
“Only that you were estranged, and she wasn’t ready to talk about it. I understood her because at the time, I was fighting my own demons. I was just starting out in the business and desperate to put my father’s dealings to rest.”
“Is that where the anger comes from?”
“Yes. I can control it now. I have to, for Trevor. It all makes sense now. She was so hurt and in so much pain when I met her. Chloe had run into some trouble when she first came to New York, and I thought that was it. I was stupid. I should have known the moment I couldn’t find out anything about her.”
“Because she lied about her last name, the way I did.” My heart thumped harder, as if trying to remind me how alike my sister and I were.
“She did. I guess it runs in the family. You have no idea the hoops I had to jump through to find her after she didn’t call me back. And still, I couldn’t find her. Your parents finally found a mention of me in her suitcase. That’s when they called me, and I told them that they had a grandson.”
“I can’t believe how much you’ve gone through. How did you manage it?”
“Mom’s been great. She’s helped a lot with Trevor, and we’ve visited your parents every few months. They came to New York as well, more than once.”
“I can’t believe they’ve been so close to me all this time. Tell me about Chloe. How was she?”
“When I met her, Chloe like a live wire. I swear I could turn around and that girl would be dancing on a restaurant table.”
I laughed, remembering my sister’s free spirit. She was the creative one in the family.
“You gave her the most wonderful time of her life. She couldn’t stop gushing about you on the way home.”
He lowered his head back into his hands, and I was afraid I’d lose him to the grief that consumed his body.
“She was the best sister I ever had. If it weren’t for that night… the accident… she’d still be here. I’m so sorry.”
Axel lifted his head. Watching his grief and heartache return after all the years that had passed pained me as well.
“Trish, was that why you run away? Because of the accident?”
“I killed her.”
“You didn’t.”
“I swerved. It will take some time until I can forgive myself, but I was the driver.” It was still difficult to believe what my mother had told me about the accident. All these years I’d believed that I was the sole person responsible.
“No, no, no. There was a car behind you. The witness reports said so. Whoever it was, they hit you from behind. You swerved to regain control on an icy road.”
“Yes, my parents just told me. But after all the years when I thought differently… It’s a lot to take in. All I remember is a bright flash in the rear view mirror. I thought it was a comet or an asteroid hitting the atmosphere. At least that’s where my NASA mind went.”
Axel got off the chair, and this time it was him kneeling in front of me, comforting me.
“You left everything because you thought Chloe’s death was your fault, just like she left because she blamed herself.” He shook his head. “You two are so alike. Were, I mean.”
I twirled the fingers of my right hand with the left, whispering, “I feel guilty for having you in my life now. I mean, if Chloe were alive, we wouldn’t have…”
“Don’t over-analyze it, or you’ll go crazy. We both will.”
“I miss her so much.”
He lifted his head and locked his gaze with mine. Revenge swam in his eyes.
“Powers is gonna pay for what he did to her. I’ll make sure he does.”
“I sort of took care of that already. That’s why I came back home. After I saw him at the gala, I knew I had to make it right for Chloe.”
“What do you mean, ‘took care of it’? What did you do, Trish?”
“Earlier this afternoon, I sent the video file Chloe had recorded on her phone to a detective. I don’t know how she did it, but she did. It’s all there. Everything Jack and his buddies did to her is on that tape. They were supposed to issue an arrest warrant this afternoon.”
Axel removed his phone from his back pocket and began typing. After a moment of silence, his phone pinged and his mouth curved up in satisfaction.
“He’s been booked. Powers is behind bars. How in the world did you get Chloe’s phone?”
“It was in the box. Mom said you brought a few of her belongings back home a few months later.”
“I remember that. Shit, if I’d only known all this, he would have paid earlier.”
“Well, now he will.” I leaned back against the chair. “I’m pretty sure they’ll want me to testify, but that evidence is solid. I can’t believe it will soon be over.”
“Trish, if I know Powers well enough, this is only the beginning. We better get ready for a fight. Have you told all this to your parents?”
“No. I wanted to make sure he was in jail before I did. And I don’t think we should do it tonight, with Trevor here.”
“Okay, how a
bout we do it tomorrow before we leave? But let’s not include too many details. It could be traumatic for them.”
“I agree.” His expression shifted from revenge mode to pure satisfaction.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I’m not sure whether this is good news or bad news, but Brad’s dead.”
“What?”
“I didn’t want to tell you over the phone.”
“When did this happen?”
“Yesterday.”
Wow!
“I’m happy and sad at the same time. That’s pretty bad. I mean, a human life was taken.”
“Would it make you feel better if I told you that he died while holding a gun to Julia’s head?”
“Oh, my god! Is she okay?”
“Yeah. She’s at the hospital now. He broke out of prison and went after Jules at Scar’s. Thankfully, our mother stopped by the house. From what I gather, it got pretty ugly.”
I could barely breathe. So much had happened in the past twenty-four hours, I was beginning to have trouble dealing with all the emotions constantly coursing through me.
“You okay?” he asked.
“I think so.” I touched my hand to my chest. “It’s a lot to take in. I can’t believe you knew my sister, and that I’m an aunt, Brad is dead, Jack’s in jail, and now you and me. Doesn’t it feel weird to you?”
“No, it feels right.”
A new feeling swept through me, suddenly making me doubt whether it was right. This man had been with my sister, had a child with her, and was going to propose to her. I’d never been jealous of Chloe before, and I wondered whether I would have been if she were still alive and she’d introduced me to her new family. Then another part of me felt stupid for thinking that, simply because I loved my sister so much. She gave me her life — in fact, she gave me everything she had, including her heart.
“Trish, your sister would have wanted you to be happy.”
I pulled on the collar of my shirt, revealing my scar.
“You’re going to think about her each time you’re with me. Every time you see this, she’s the one who will cross your mind.”
“You’re wrong. I will never forget Chloe because she’s the mother of my child. And also, because she gave you to me. She made sure that she’d always be part of our lives, through you. But you are you. You’re not her, and I would never want you to think that you’re replacing her, because you’re not, Trish. You are Patricia Dalton. One of the most beautiful women I’ve ever met. I’m lucky to have found Chloe and blessed that she gave me the most wonderful son in the world, but I’m even luckier because I found another woman I can love, who I know is crazy about my son and will love him with her whole heart.”
“You love me?”
“I do. I love all of you, baby. All of you.” He cupped my face into both of his hands, kissing my lips gently.
I pulled away, my breath sealed in my lungs.
“I… I don’t know if it makes sense, but I think Chloe guided me to find you.”
“I think she did.” He smiled, leaning his forehead against mine.
“So we’re okay? We’re going to be okay? Brad’s gone, Jack’s behind bars, and we’re… we can be happy, right?”
Why was there so much doubt inside me? My heart beat urgently as if warning me not to get too comfortable, but how could I not be? After all the years of guilt and repression, I could finally let go of it all.
“Yeah, I think we are. Jack better be glad that he’s behind bars. Otherwise I’d be at his doorstep already, thinking about the best way to rip him to shreds.”
He pulled me into his lap, and I leaned against him.
“Trish, I don’t want you to move to that apartment.”
“Why?”
“Because I want you with me — with us.”
“I… I don’t know. Isn’t it too soon?”
“Well, we’re already a family, and it would be nice for Trevor to have his aunt nearby.”
I sighed, taking him into my arms, holding him, letting him grieve all over again — letting us both grieve for what we had lost, but also realizing what we’d gained. I took his hand and brought it to my chest. He traced the ripple of my scar with his fingers and leaned his head over my bosom before weeping. My heart absorbed all his painful tears.
“If Trevor agrees as well, then I’ll move in.”
He wrapped his arms around me, squeezing tightly. “I think Trevor will be over the moon happy.”
“And you?”
“I’ll be out of my mind horny all the time.”
I laughed. “Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
Axel took my lips with his, kissing me sensually. Delectable shivers swept through my body. This kiss wasn’t like any other. It meant so much more. We were one — no matter what happened, I’d always be in Axel’s and Trevor’s lives and they’d be in mine. The connection we had through my sister was permanent.
The top button of my blouse popped open, and I let out a quiet moan into his mouth. At my invitation, Axel helped me up, never breaking our kiss. The intensity of our touches heated, his hands roaming over my body and mine over his.
“Trevor…” I whispered in between our lips.
“They’re setting up the tent.” He pointed to the backyard. I glanced their way, and now more comfortable, let Axel kiss me in all the ways I’d always wanted to be kissed. By someone who loved me.
“Wait.” I pulled away.
“What’s the matter?”
“I… I love you too. With all that I am and with my new heart.”
I was stripped in seconds. That evening, for the first time, we were together knowing that we loved each other. The overwhelming cluster of feelings that was swirling inside of me made me tired again, and I fell asleep in Axel’s arms after the first round of love making, my evening ending much sooner than I would have liked.
Chapter 20
When I woke up the next morning, Axel was gone. I was beginning to think that he had a habit of leaving the bed in the morning, and wanting to cuddle, I made a note to talk to him about that. When I opened my eyes, instead of his loving gaze, a pair of younger eyes stared back at me. They would have normally reminded me of Axel, but this morning I saw Chloe in her son’s – my nephew’s – eyes.
“Good morning. Was I snoring?”
“No,” he laughed.
“Did you have a good night camping?”
“Gwamma and Gwampa wewe snowing, and I told Gwamma that I want to go home and she took me inside.”
“And you left Grampa in the tent?”
“Yes.”
Trevor’s giggles were the best sound ever. A moment later, he stopped and took on a more serious expression.
“Is it twue? Is it weally, weally twue? Awe you my auntie?”
I wondered how long Trevor had been staring at me this morning, waiting for me to wake up and get the answer.
“Yes, it’s true.” I smiled.
His mouth stretched from side to side in a wide smile, but his gaze lowered to the scar on my chest. Trevor reached to me and touched the white mark. I held my breath as he ran his tiny finger up and down.
“Is Mommy here?”
I wasn’t expecting to have serious conversations this early in the morning. “She is, baby. Did Daddy tell you?”
He nodded. There was a pinch of sadness in his eyes, mixed with happiness.
“Yes. Your mommy was my sister. She saved me by giving me her heart.”
“Mommy was a hewo just like daddy?”
“Yes, she definitely was.”
He scooted closer and leaned his head against my chest, listening to the beating of my heart. I felt my pulse rush as his little hand slid close to the scar, almost by his cheek. I wasn’t sure how long Trevor remained like that, but I didn’t want to do anything to disturb him.
“It sounds like mommy’s heart. And yours too. It sounds like both of you.”
“Well, if you’d like, you
can listen to it any time.”
This time his big smile revealed his pearly white teeth. Trevor had lost all his front baby teeth already, and the new ones were still different lengths.
“Where’s Daddy?” I asked.
“He went out, and Gwamma is making bwekfast with Geowge, and Gwampa is still snowing in the tent.”
Grateful that I’d worn my shorts to bed, I pulled the covers aside and slid from underneath.
“Did you brush your teeth?” I asked as I walked to the bathroom.
“Yes.” Trevor followed me inside. Feeling my bladder, I stopped by the toilet and looked back at him. Trevor turned around and lifted his hands to his eyes, saying, “I’m giving you pwivacy. Daddy says it’s impowtant.”
“Thank you.”
With Trevor turned around and me getting used to the idea of someone else being in the bathroom while I peed, my bladder couldn’t take it any longer.
This is going to take some getting used to.
I did my business and washed my hands. As I wet my toothbrush, I saw Trevor standing beside me. He lifted his hands and I took that as a sign that he wanted to sit on the counter, so I lifted him.
He sat, watching me brush my teeth. I had a funny feeling that Trevor would be stuck to my side all day long, which I totally didn’t mind. I was looking forward to learning more about my nephew as much as he was probably wondering about me.
“Twish, did mommy like dinosaurs?”
“She loved them.”
His eyes grew wide open.
“In fact, I think she may have some books in her old room I think you’d like.”
He nodded his head up and down quickly and jumped off the counter, ready to go. Instead of going downstairs, I led Trevor to Chloe’s room. We sat down on the floor, and I pulled a few of her books from the shelf.
I leaned back against the wall, and holding the book in front of him, he sat between my legs. As we flipped through the pages, Trevor pointed to the words and I read them. The moment felt magical. A warm breeze swept thought the room, teasing my gaze upward. The curtains moved slightly, and I could have sworn that I felt my sister’s presence in the room.
“If you’d like, we can go out today to buy some dinosaur coloring books.”