by B. B. Hamel
I didn’t want to. I wanted to forget about him, accept his offer of money and just move on with my life. As soon as the war ended, I kept telling myself, I’d get off the compound and move away. I’d forget about Vince.
But I still couldn’t stop thinking about him. He was everywhere, in everything I did. Every time I looked at Alexei, I saw Vince. I heard the words he said to me back in that garden.
Expectations never failed to let us down, because expectations never mirrored reality. Our expectations were always filtered through our own distorted sense of self, our own distorted sense of the world, and our own distorted beliefs. And still it was always painful when our expectations were shattered and destroyed.
The cart came with my breakfast and I feed Alexei while watching TV. For a few minutes, I forgot that I was a single mother in the middle of a gang war, disowned by her family but also hunted by them at the same time. Instead, I pretended like I was sitting in a five-star hotel.
After ten minutes of that fantasy, there was a knock at the door. “Come in,” I called out, assuming it was Sonya.
I needed to stop assuming. Vince stepped inside, smirking at me. “Morning, mommy,” he said.
I made a face. “Oh god, no. Don’t.”
He laughed. “Okay, fine. Princess.”
“Better, but not much.”
“How’s it going?”
I shrugged. “Fine. What do you need?”
“Listen for a second.” He walked over and sat across from me, his muscles stretching and flexing as he sat. He wore a tight black T-shirt and jeans that fit him just right.
“Okay,” I said, confused.
“I saw something yesterday, and it made me want to try something.”
“Look, Vince, I’m not sure I’m into the weird stuff.”
He laughed. “Please, princess. If I wanted to fuck you, I’d fuck you any damn way I pleased.”
I blushed. “What do you want then?”
He held out his arms and looked at Alexei. “Can I?”
I paused, surprised. “Uh, sure.”
I stood up and walked Alexei over, placing him down in Vince’s arms.
Vince laughed. “He moves around a lot.”
“He’s just exploring the world.” I sat back down on the couch, eyeing him strangely. “Is this the only reason you’re here?”
He shrugged, watching Alexei. I sat in silence as Vince bounced Alexei and looked at him, Alexei staring back up at him. And then Alexei smiled, and Vince smiled, and I felt something very, very strange inside me.
Vince looked back up at me. “Yeah, this is why I’m here.”
“What could you have possibly seen that made you want to hold Alex?”
“Just a Chinese gangster with his granddaughter.”
“Oh,” I said. “I see.”
Although I didn’t, not really.
“Why don’t you let me watch Alex for a little while?” he asked.
“Uh, I don’t know about that. Can you handle it?”
“Sure,” he said. “If I have a problem, I’ll call Sonya.”
“Where should I go?”
“Actually, Lucas’s wife was looking for you.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Really?”
“She said you had met already, asked me to send you to her room when you’re ready.”
“Oh,” I said, completely shocked and mystified. “This is a really weird morning.”
He laughed. “Yeah. No fucking shit.”
“Well, you’re sure you’re okay?”
“Fine. Just go. I’ll call Sonya if I need help.”
“Okay.” I stood up, staring at the two of them. Vince laughed and Alexei squirmed, smiling up at him. “Okay,” I said again. “Have fun I guess.”
Vince grunted at me, and I turned and walked toward the door. I put my hand on the knob, my stomach a knot of uncertainty.
This was what I wanted. So why did it feel so strange?
I turned the knob and left the room, letting the door shut behind me.
I had just left my son alone with his father, his gangster, killer father who yesterday said he wanted nothing to do with Alexei, and who now suddenly wanted to babysit. It was a pretty intense one-eighty turn, but I couldn’t pretend like I wasn’t happy about it.
I took a deep breath. Alexei was going to be just fine. Vince would call Sonya if something went wrong.
I began to walk down the hall, hoping he’d call her anyway. Just in case.
I found the door to Nat’s room standing open. “Hello?” I called out as I went inside.
“Come in.”
I saw Nat standing in the kitchen.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hey yourself. Wine?”
I walked over to her and laughed. “Sure, okay.”
She poured me a little glass of white wine. “One good thing about being around Italians,” she said, “is the wine.”
“I’m so glad I’m not pregnant anymore.”
Nat laughed. “Right? You can’t do any fun things.”
“I still can’t, not really. I have to be careful how much coffee I drink. Shouldn’t have too much alcohol either. It’ll get into the breast milk.”
Nat nodded. “Men don’t understand. They can drink whatever they want.”
“Vince is far away from understanding,” I said. “Although he’s watching Alexei right now.”
Nat raised an eyebrow. “Really?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I don’t know why, but I guess he saw something that made him want to spend time with Alex.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“I really don’t know,” I said honestly.
Nat leaned up against the counter. “What do you think about him?”
“Can I be honest?”
“Of course.”
“He’s an arrogant asshole.”
Nat laughed, nodding. “Sounds about right.”
“But I love being around him. He makes me feel something I’ve never felt before.”
“Yeah,” Nat said softly. “I know just what you mean.”
“He told me just recently that he has no interest in being a father to Alexei.”
“And now he’s babysitting?”
I nodded. “The man is all over the place.”
“Give him time. He’ll come around.”
“Why do you think that?”
“Vince had a hard life,” she said. “He didn’t have a father, and he probably thinks he doesn’t know how to be one.”
“I didn’t realize that.”
“The mob was his family. He doesn’t think you can be a good member of the mob and still raise a family.”
“But you guys are doing it.”
She smiled and nodded. “Vince can be blind to certain things sometimes.”
“It’s just so frustrating. I never wanted any of this. I didn’t come here to trap Vince into being a father.”
“I know that.”
“But now I feel like just being around him is making him feel that way.”
“Maybe,” Nat said. “But again, is that so bad?”
“No, I guess not,” I said, shaking my head.
“Look, can I offer some advice?”
“Of course.”
“I think you need to figure out what you want. You’re clearly torn about Vince, and for good reason. But he’s trying, and if you want him around, you’re going to have to accept that.”
“He is who he is,” I said.
“Exactly.” She smiled, sipping her drink.
“Where are your kids, by the way?”
“With Sonya.”
“Must be nice to have a break.”
She smiled and shrugged. “Sometimes. And sometimes I miss them as soon as they’re gone. It’s strange.”
“Yeah. I know the feeling.”
We spent the next half hour just talking. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to talk with Natalie, but it felt like we got along really well. I was getting more and more comfortable a
round her, and it was great to have another mother to talk with.
Back at home, I couldn’t talk with my mother. She just wasn’t interested in talking about my bastard son. Whatever my father said was what she did, a good, obedient little Russian wife. It felt amazing to finally have another mother to talk about this stuff with, someone who’d gone through something similar.
After our wine glasses were empty, Nat stretched. “Kids are coming back soon,” she said.
“Okay. I’ll get out of your hair.”
“Before you go.” Her face got serious suddenly. “I wanted to see you for a reason.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Just a warning.” She looked out the window, frowning. “In war, men do stupid things. There are whispers going around. People aren’t happy that you’re still here.”
“But Arturo said I’d be safe?”
“You will be, but he can’t control what everyone does. Just be careful, okay? Don’t wander around alone.”
I nodded. “Okay. I think I’m fine, though. They’re watching me.”
“Good. Just be safe.”
“Thanks, Natalie.”
She walked me to the door and hugged me. “I’m happy you’re here. Don’t go anywhere.”
“I won’t.”
I left her room and heard it click shut behind me
I felt good as I walked back to my room. Natalie made me feel safe and cared about, although her warning was nagging at me. I understood why people might be angry about my presence, but I couldn’t imagine Arturo would let anyone hurt me. That’d only make things worse with my family.
Then again, maybe they’d want that to happen.
I tried not to let that get to me too much. I couldn’t control it. I’d just have to make sure I didn’t stray too far from my rooms. There was a war going on, and I could see how people would want to take it out on the innocent Russian girl who had started it all.
I pushed open the door to my room, not thinking, and looked up sharply as Vince stepped toward me.
“Quiet,” he said softly.
“What’s wrong?”
He grinned. “Alex is sleeping.”
I let out a breath. “You scared me.”
“Sorry.”
I shut the door softly behind me and walked into the room. Alexei was lying in his little crib, sleeping peacefully.
Vince stood behind me, looking down at the kid. “Easy,” he whispered. “He’s no problem at all.”
I turned around, and he was right on top of me, inches away.
Natalie’s advice came flooding back into my mind.
I needed to figure out what I wanted. I needed to make up my mind. His strong body was inches away from mine, his cocky grin making my panties soaking wet.
And so I pushed myself against him and kissed him hard.
24
Vince
The girl tasted like fire when she kissed me.
I hadn’t expected it. As far as I knew, she was still fucking pissed at me for telling her I didn’t want to be a daddy.
But apparently doing some babysitting made her wet, because she threw herself at me with a passion I hadn’t expected.
Not like I fucking minded. I grabbed her hips and pulled her away from the kid as I kissed her, my tongue touching hers, that taste flooding my mouth. We stumbled across the room, and I ended up pushing her up against the door to her bedroom.
“Vince,” she said as I kissed her neck, “we can’t. He’s sleeping. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Shhh,” I whispered in her ear. “I’m going to fuck you until you want to scream. And you’re going to stay absolutely quiet.”
I pressed my hand down her pants, flicking underneath her panties. Her pussy was soaked, and I heard her choke back a moan.
“Vince, we shouldn’t,” she said. “He’s right there.”
“Forget the kid,” I whispered in her ear. “Concentrate on my fingers rubbing this fucking soaked clit.”
“I don’t know.”
“You started this,” I said, grinning. “Now I’m going to finish it.”
I pressed a finger deep inside her and watched her face light up with pleasure. She bit her lip to keep from moaning, grabbing on to my arms.
My cock was fucking hard as hell. Trying to stay quiet around the baby was exciting as fuck, and it only made me want her all that much more. I wanted to see if she could be quiet or if I could make her break and moan my name like the dirty girl I knew she was.
“Look at you,” I whispered in her ear, so softly, rubbing her clit. “You can’t help yourself. You want to throw yourself at me because you know how I can make you feel.”
I rubbed her clit in slow, furious movements, making her whole body tense. She was biting her lip and gripping my arms hard as I worked her, sliding my fingers inside her and then back to her clit.
“Don’t make a noise,” I whispered. “Except I’m going to try to make you scream anyway.”
“Vince!” she whispered. “Don’t.”
“I want to hear you come. Wake the whole fucking house; I don’t care.”
I grabbed her hips and spun her around roughly. She gasped as she put her hands up against the door, pressing her ass against my hard dick. I kept my fingers on her soaked pussy, working her from behind. I pressed my lips against her neck and her ear from behind, whispering softly.
“I’m going to fuck you right here,” I said. “I’m going to make you fucking sweat and come, rough and hard. And you’re going to take it.”
“Don’t,” she said. “We can’t be loud.”
“I don’t give a fuck,” I whispered. “I just want this tight fucking cunt wrapped around my cock.” I pressed my fingers deep inside her, and she let out a small, soft moan.
I kept working her like that, and she actively bit back any more noises, trying to stay quiet. I loved pushing her body, working her, and watching her trying so hard not to wake the baby up. It was so fucking sexy the way she could barely stop herself from moaning my name.
I pulled my hand from her panties and tugged her shorts down her hips. She stayed perfectly still as I slowly moved down her body, dropping to my knees as I pulled them off. I tossed them aside and spread her legs.
I pressed my mouth between her legs and began to lick her pussy from behind. She gasped and tried to protest, but she was too worried about making noise. I held her hips firmly as I pressed my tongue deep between her legs and inside her pussy, lapping her up.
I loved her taste, her fucking sexy ass in my face, her body tense and straining not to make noise. I pressed her legs open wide and sucked her pussy, licking her. I wanted to slap her ass but held back, deciding to play the quiet game. Instead, I held her hips roughly as I licked and sucked her cunt, eating her pussy from behind.
I looked up and saw her looking back, her face in total pleasure, her hands straining against the door. She was clearly trying hard not to moan, and I loved it. I wanted to drive her wild, make her lose herself. I licked her top to bottom, eating her wildly, starving for her fucking cunt. I pressed my tongue deep inside her and fucked her, pressing in and out and then rolling it down along her.
She was dripping wet from my mouth and from being so fucking excited. I loved how wet she got and loved her taste. It was like a fucking dessert as I licked and sucked up her juices, eating every inch of her, driving her fucking wild.
And finally, I stood. She went to move, but I pressed her back against the door. “Stay,” I whispered in her ear.
“Vince,” she whispered back, but I stepped away. I took off my shirt, grinning at her. She watched over her shoulder, legs spread, pussy dripping, hands against the wall. I unbuckled my belt and took my pants off, fishing a condom out of my pocket before tossing them aside.
She watched as I pulled off my boxer briefs. My cock was hard and straight, fucking straining and desperate for her tight pussy. She bit her lip as she looked at me, and I smirked at her, pressing myself against her. My
cock slipped between her legs but didn’t push inside her.
“I’m going to fuck this cunt until you come,” I whispered. “And you’re not going to make a single sound.”
“I can’t,” she said. “I can’t. I can’t stop myself.”
“You’re going to be a good girl and take this fucking cock nice and quiet.”
“Oh fuck, Vince,” she said, grinding her hips along my shaft. “Oh fuck. I can’t be quiet.”
I grabbed her hair, pulling it back. She gasped. “You’ll be quiet while I fuck you.”
“Okay. Please, just fuck me.”
I grinned and stepped back. I opened the condom and rolled it down my length while she watched.
I kicked her legs open wider, teasing her pussy with my fingers, sliding them in and out. I fucked her with my fingers from behind, working her pussy, getting her ready for my big cock. She took it and loved it, practically ready to beg for more, but she was staying quiet.
I grabbed her hips and pressed my big cock against her. She bit her lip and closed her eyes as I slowly pressed myself deep inside her, my cock sliding between her legs, deep into her soaked pussy.
“Oh shit,” she whispered, her fingers gripping the wall.
“Don’t make a sound,” I whispered in her ear. “Or I won’t make you come.”
I began to rock back and forth slowly, sliding myself in and out of her.
“You’re so big,” she groaned softly. “I can’t help myself.”
I thrust once, hard and deep. “Quiet,” I warned and grabbed her hair. I began to thrust slowly in and out, and I watched her face, loving the way her eyes shut, her teeth biting down on her lip to keep herself from moaning.
It was driving me absolutely fucking crazy to take her body like that, up against her door. We had to stay quiet to not wake the baby, but I wanted to fuck her like an animal, hear the slap of my skin against her ass.
Instead, I kept working her slowly, fucking her deep, savoring her soaking wet pussy tight around my cock. She lengthened her back and dipped her head forward as I kept fucking her.
“Take that cock nice and quiet,” I whispered in her ear. “Don’t make a sound. I’m going to fuck you rough and hard and you’re going to take it.”
She nodded, her mouth hanging open.