by MarieMedina
“Are you and your father at war? I don’t know what time it is here, but it’s nine in the morning on the other side of that door. I can see the sun coming in the window. If you’re in bed during the day, I’m guessing things aren’t so bad.”
“We’re not at war. Yet. And I’ve been having trouble sleeping. We’re ahead of you, a bit, but we have longer days so it varies all year long.”
“You’re having trouble sleeping?”
“Yes. I learned horrible things about the man I already despised having for a father. And I hurt you. Was rejected by you. It’s been a pretty miserable week.”
“I’m not here to be with you. I want that to be clear. I’m not saying I hate you or can’t forgive you. But I’m here for myself. Okay?”
“I understand.”
“I want your father to pay for what he did. And I’ll help in any way I can. I hesitated to come, but a dream I had … well, it motivated me.”
“Someone died?”
“Yes. I saw you die. You were on a horse, and an arrow pierced your heart. A man who looked almost exactly like you, but with slightly longer hair, came to your side and held you as you died.”
“Henri. He’s my twin.”
Sebastian took a deep breath, feeling a bit chilled. “I didn’t know that. This mean it’s going to happen? That it was a vision of the future?”
“A possible future. I’ve accused Grayden of murder. That’s the king—I refuse to refer to him as my father anymore. I’ve demanded that he give up the throne. He has another five days to respond. Thus far, nothing.”
“Who’s most likely to win?”
“More of the kingdom is standing with me.”
“They would support you as king?”
Alexander nodded. “Yes. Most of the people love me. It’s easy to do so with Grayden being so useless and unfeeling. He does nothing for the people. I try to help. I do what I can.”
“What do you do?”
“You want examples?”
“Yes. Shouldn’t you be trying to make yourself look good in front of me?”
Alexander looked hurt. “I won’t brag to win your favor. I do things the present king thinks are beneath him. Yes, I want to convince you to be with me because I’m already falling in love with you, but what I do for my people is purely for their sake.” He pushed his breath out and met Sebastian’s gaze. “Just being near you and not being able to touch you is painful enough. I’d give anything to have you at my side supporting me through this.”
Sebastian looked down, struggling to swallow. When he lifted his gaze again, he said, “I’m sorry. I genuinely wanted to know in order to learn what kind of man you are. I didn’t mean for that to sound snarky. But I am still pretty angry about the way you tricked me.”
Alexander nodded. “All right. Just bear in mind that my point of view is different. I’m hurting because I’ve waited half my life to find you. Because I think you’re perfect for me and want you to think so as well. And I’m angry at myself for the way I handled things. Angry I hurt you and frightened you.”
Sebastian felt tears at the back of his eyes. “I don’t know what to say to you. It’s what kept me away.” He moved to stand in front of Alexander. “Do you understand?”
“Yes.” Alexander closed his eyes a long moment. When he opened them again, he said, “Then right now we focus on something else. I have to think of my people, and you wish to see justice done.”
How the fuck are we going to do that with this shit hanging between us? Why did I come here?
Alexander cleared his throat. “I think you figured this out last week, but when your mind is very focused, your thoughts can come across to me.”
“Shit,” Sebastian said. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine. I agree it’s going to be hard.” He cleared his throat. “Do you want your memories back? It will only take a few minutes.”
“Can someone else do it? Someone besides you?”
Alexander seemed to wince. “Yes, anyone.”
“Don’t be upset. You’re just … you’re already in my head more than enough.”
“Would you trust my mother? My twin is a bit aggressive. He might overwhelm you with questions.”
“Yeah, your mother would be fine.”
“I’ll go get her.” He went to a large wardrobe and pulled out clothes that were more masculine than the robe but that still looked odd to Sebastian. He stripped the robe off and began dressing in leather trousers and some kind of tunic, and Sebastian didn’t look away. This man was beautiful, far more beautiful than anyone Sebastian had ever been with before.
Alexander caught him looking but didn’t comment on it. He strode over to the bed and quickly slid his boots on. When he rose again, he said, “No matter what, you are fey. I’m your prince and hope to soon be your king. I will protect you even if you ultimately reject me. Even if you wed another.”
“Thank you, but you don’t have to reassure me.”
“I don’t? Are you saying you trust me?”
“I’ve never heard anyone speak so passionately. I believe you, for better or worse.” He bit his lip and asked in a rush, “Are you really falling in love with me? I don’t see how. Or why.”
“Why? You don’t fall in love with someone because of things you could list on a piece of paper. But what I loved most was how concerned you were when you saw how stressed and weary I was last week. I can’t explain the how. But yes, you’re winning my heart. Your desire to help me, help all of us, is admirable, too. Yet that’s not the answer either.”
“Can of worms. Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“Don’t say that. I’m glad you’re taking me seriously. But what do you mean by can of worms?”
“It’s a phrase we use. It means my question was complicated and all that. Like if a bunch of worms were in a can trying to get out?”
“Oh. I see. Like a Gordian knot?” He smiled softly, just for a moment.
“Yeah. Close enough.”
“It’s hard to pick those things up just going to the human world every now and then.”
“Why is this place called the Veiled Court? Is that the name of the royal court or the entire world?”
“It’s what we call the entire realm. The world of the living is the Veiled Court, where some secrets are still hidden. When we die, we go to the Unveiled Court, where all is revealed and we go to our fate.” He nodded to the door. “Let me fetch my mother. I’ll do so discretely. You’ll soon have all your questions answered.”
Sebastian watched him go. All my questions? Not hardly. I can’t help these people. I don’t even know what I’m doing here. But as he sat down on the bed and found his hand drifting over the sheets as he breathed in Alexander’s scent, he knew what had brought him there.
Chapter Five
Alexander stood in the hallway outside his bedroom, trying to be patient. He’d left his mother with Sebastian half an hour ago. His two younger brothers had arrived, and he’d gone to greet them in an attempt to kill some time. They’d tied up their affairs in the human world and come to stand with him. Nathaniel and Rory had been curious about Sebastian, yet they’d insisted Alexander return to his room to see how things were going when they noted his anxiety. After they’d teased him a bit, of course. Now, Alexander wished he’d kept talking with them. Anything, including teasing from his younger siblings, was better than this waiting. He could faintly hear his mother’s soft voice and wondered what they might be talking about. She’d never been the type to interfere, but what might Sebastian want to know? What questions could he be asking?
Alexander jumped when the door opened, and his mother laughed as she gently shut it behind her. “Everything all right?” he asked.
“Yes. He’s fine. Memories fully restored, and he’s adjusting perfectly.” She smiled. “He’s a very sweet and thoughtful man. Very mature for his age. And intelligent. I think that’s helping him deal with the resurgence of his memories.” She gestured to the door. “G
o on. Go in and talk to him.”
“I don’t know what to say to him.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I already care for him so much. I’m more nervous about trying to win him than I am about fighting Grayden.”
Venetia’s brows came together, and she shook her head in seeming dismay. “I always knew you were my worrier. Get in there. He’s a bit stunned now that he has the fullest sense of his situation. He grew up on a farm and never expected to be the cariad of the crown prince. Get. In. There.” She sighed. “Before you both overthink this.”
Alexander kissed his mother and then obeyed her. Sebastian sat on the bed, but he rose when Alexander came in. He actually bowed stiffly, looking intimidated, which Alexander didn’t like at all.
“Your Highness,” Sebastian said, lifting his gaze as he straightened up.
Alexander shook his head adamantly as he crossed the room. “No, please. Don’t withdraw into formality. I’m the same man. Don’t treat me differently now.”
“Hard not to.” Sebastian clasped his hands behind his back. “I feel like a different person.”
“I understand.” He paused to see if Sebastian would elaborate. When he didn’t, he asked, “What can I do?”
“I don’t know.” Sebastian sat. “I feel a bit shaky.”
Alexander went to the table set against the wall and poured Sebastian a glass of water. “Here,” he said, crossing the room again. “Drink this.”
“Thanks.” He took a few measured sips before saying, “I understand more about your motivations. Why you did what you did. It’s not the kind of situation you can prepare for. And I know why you felt you had to come and get me. I was just a child when I left, but I already knew how important the bond was.”
“How do you feel about being my cariad now you understand what it means?” While he feared the answer in a way, he was still desperate to hear it.
Sebastian looked up and laughed, which confused Alexander at first. It soon became obvious it was nervous laughter. “I don’t know. It’s a big responsibility.”
“No, Sebastian. I’m not asking how you feel about my social position. I’m asking how you feel about me. Now that you know I’m not crazy or trying to do you harm.”
“It’s overwhelming. You’re my prince. I’m going to support you and help you fight the king. It’s still hard to believe what’s happening. My two lives are blending, melting together. I feel loyalty to you. I’m proud you want to do what is right. That’s getting mixed up with other feelings.” Sebastian met his gaze, licking his lower lip.
“Other feelings?” Alexander asked after only a few seconds.
“How I felt when you kissed me. When we touched. And … when I sucked your cock.” Sebastian turned bright red and looked away.
“You weren’t embarrassed before. You certainly weren’t when you did it.”
Sebastian quietly said, “I didn’t know who you were.” He tapped his chest. “In here. Not until today. When we were together, you were just a man I liked. Now you’re…” He gestured at Alexander, seemingly lost for words. He sighed, fidgeting with the seam of his jeans as he lowered his gaze again.
“I don’t want to overwhelm you. Do you want to be alone?”
“No. Please stay.” Sebastian looked up. “I’ll get used to it.”
Get used to it? I want more than that. So much more. “I can give you time. I’m happy simply knowing you’re safe. That the spell didn’t harm you.”
Sebastian flexed his hand and moved it over his glass. A couple of drops of water rose and then fell back into the glass. “It’s so strange to feel the power flowing through me again. I’m excited but kind of scared.”
“Were you skillful as a child? Did you use your magic often?”
“Yes. I loved using my powers.” He set the glass aside and turned away.
When Sebastian didn’t say or do anything else, Alexander inched closer. “What is it?”
Sebastian began shaking.
“Sebastian?”
He turned back, tears rolling down his face. “He … killed her. I r-remember s-so c-clearly. He left … br-bruises on my arms. I f-f-fought s-so hard … and f-felt so helpless.”
Alexander wiped at Sebastian’s tears with his thumbs and then pulled the man into his arms, grateful Sebastian didn’t pull away. “I’ll kill him. I swear I will. He’ll never hurt you or any of my people again.” He caressed Sebastian’s hair, longing to kiss the tears away yet holding back and simply saying, “I’m so sorry.”
* * * *
Sebastian clung to Alexander, feeling safe and protected in his arms. He wasn’t even sure how long they stayed like that. Being held by the prince felt right, though Sebastian tried to stop his tears. “I’m sorry.” He drew back a bit and took a steadying breath. “I guess it took a while for it to hit me.”
“Don’t apologize. There’s no shame in grief. Cry as much as you need to. I’ll hold you as long as you’ll let me.”
Sebastian pulled from Alexander’s arms and wiped at his eyes. “It’s strange looking at you now. You’re the same, yet you aren’t.” He still felt the tears welling from behind his eyes, but that initial outburst had made him feel much better. What had once been a void within him was now filled, but the pain of his restored memories took away from the joy of finally knowing the truth.
“Is that good or bad?”
“Good. I think. I feel flattered.”
“Flattered? Because you’re my cariad? I like to think the fates know what they’re doing. That they have reasons for pairing us.”
“Maybe they do, but I meant the way you’ve pursued me. You seem to want me so much.”
“I do. My feelings are very strong already.”
“That makes more sense now I understand how it works, but I still don’t get it. I can’t be what you’ve spent all these years expecting. Especially knowing I come from a family of farmers.”
“Without farmers, we’d all starve. Don’t think that way. My mother was the daughter of a miller. My paternal grandmother was the child of farmers.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
Sebastian clasped his hands together to keep from fidgeting. “I’m the same age as your youngest brother. Does that matter to you?”
A faint smile touched Alexander’s lips. “I suppose it would’ve been strange ten years ago, but I couldn’t imagine anyone objecting to a pairing with you.” His smile fading, he asked, “Are you asking because of the way other men treated you?”
“Yeah.”
“Forget them. I did initially worry about our age difference, but my fear was that you wouldn’t want me.”
“It was?”
“Yes. I worried we wouldn’t be compatible at all, but let me make it clear that I don’t see you as a child. You’re a handsome and intelligent man, and I’d be honored to have you at my side. Proud even.”
“You said all your other lovers were women. Yet you’re fine with this. You seem fine anyway.”
“Of course I am.”
“I’ve never been attracted to a woman in my life. Suddenly being told I was meant to be with one would throw me. Shock me. Honestly, I’m not sure it would work out at all.” He paused. “You’re really attracted to me?”
A bit of heat came to Alexander’s gaze. “You have to ask that after the way I reacted to you that night?”
Sebastian shook his head, his body stirring at the memory of Alexander trembling under his touch. “I guess it’s because I’ve been living in a different world. Different culture. This is like an arranged marriage.”
“But we both still have a choice. Nearly twenty percent of fated pairs decide to go their separate ways. I won’t touch you again unless you invite me to.”
While Sebastian felt grateful Alexander wasn’t pressuring him, he knew he wanted them to touch again. But Alexander wasn’t just any man. If all went well, he’d be king soon. Being with him in any way was a serious matter.
“Thank you,” Sebastian said eventually. “I want to focus on helping you. Seeing the king brought to justice. We can get to know each other more as I do that.” He rubbed his forehead. “I don’t know what to do about school. There are three more weeks this semester. I’m almost done with my degree.”
“I know you have an entire life there, but … you wouldn’t need a degree here.”
“You mean, if I’m with you.”
“You don’t have to be with me to stay. This land is your true home. You’ll always have a place here.”
Throwing his hands up, Sebastian said, “But what would I do, farm? I don’t really know how. It’s been years. I was just a kid doing simple chores. You don’t need someone to teach human history or literature here, I imagine.”
“You’d have plenty of options. I’d see to that. Your knowledge would be valued. You could still be a teacher or tutor here, if you wished.”
Sebastian held his gaze. “You’d help me even if we don’t work out?”
“Of course. You’re still one of my people. And I won’t stop caring for you if you choose not to be with me.”
Though he didn’t want to start an argument, he said, “It’s easy for you to say that now. I’d be foolish to trust you so completely and not make plans of my own. Stand on my own two feet.”
Alexander nodded. “It is easy for me promise you things. I understand why you say that.” He gave a long exhale. “I know none of this is easy for you. I’m just glad you’re feeling more at ease around me.”
“You’re right. You are the same man.” Sebastian let his gaze wander over Alexander, noting the prince holding his breath as this happened. “I guess I can drop the title when we’re alone. Find out what’s really between us now the truth’s out.”
“I should see to a room for you. If you’ll stay.”
Sebastian stared at the door that led back to the human world. “I don’t know what to do about that. To stay or go back. I might worry myself to death if I leave, but staying here? I doubt I’m going to sleep much no matter what I do. But I do know what I want to do before sunset today.”