by Alice Wilde
I hardly hear a word Lena says. I know I shouldn’t be listening in on the conversation Annalise is currently having, but I can’t help myself. Louis’s story makes sense, and it helps to put me slightly more at ease with the camp, but it’s Annalise’s words that bother me.
It’s hard for me to tell if she’s completely dismissed us as lovers or if she wishes we were. Or perhaps she only wants one of us. This shouldn’t be bothering me. Of the three of us, I know better than to expect or want anything more than to protect her.
Lena’s voice fades as the fairytale comes to an end and Louis gets up. I move to take his place beside Annalise.
“I’m not sure we should stay the night,” I say.
Almost immediately, I can tell this isn’t going to go over well with Annalise. I know she’s tired, we’re all tired, but I wish she’d trust me more. And I doubt Roan is going to say anything to back me up. At least she agrees to sleep on the outskirts of the camp. We’ll have an easier time protecting ourselves or escaping quickly if need be.
It’s only after we’ve laid out the bedding that I realize how fatigued I’ve become over the past weeks. As badly as I crave sleep, I refuse Roan’s offer to take first watch…at first. I do want to stay awake and protect Annalise, but they’re right. If I don’t rest, I won’t be good for much of anything, let alone protecting anyone from harm.
I lie down and close my eyes. I can already feel sleep creeping up on me when I’m startled by the feeling of small hands grasping my sore feet. I open my eyes to see that Annalise has taken one of my feet in her lap and started to massage it, although it’s more ticklish than relaxing.
“Then you might as well put a bit more power into it.”
I’m sure my words come off coarser than I intend, but I’m too tired to be less than blunt. Annalise makes a snarky remark but presses hard into my feet nonetheless. It’s almost painful. Almost. She doesn’t know how much this simple gesture and the pressure points in my feet are arousing me. Perhaps it’s a good thing I’m so worn out.
I smile to myself and let sleep overtake me.
Five
Ero
I want to run and never look back. So much of me had hoped that Louis and his men were Damien’s or bandits that when they turned out to be otherwise, I was more than a little disappointed. I wanted so badly to tear something apart that even dinner can’t satiate me.
Li is worried. He knows Damien far better than any of us, and I know better than to disregard caution when it comes to him. That doesn’t mean I’ll just kneel and obey, but I’ll play my part. Besides, I’d almost hoped he’d ask.
Now, here I am scouring the woods once again for any sign of him or his men. Hell, I’ll even take a down a party of bandits if I come across them. Anything to release some of the tension that’s been building in me since we escaped Damien’s clutches.
I can’t quite figure out what’s going on between the four of us. I know Li has feelings for Annalise. He made that pretty obvious from the start. But Roan? I hadn’t expected him to start fawning over the girl quite as much as he has been. Damn, even I feel something for her.
I thought our feelings for her would ease once we got far enough away from Damien, or at the very least our bond would lessen. So far, that hasn’t been the case.
All I want to do is protect her, keep the other two from touching her, and tear Damien’s throat out. Alright, that’s not entirely true. Food and sex are high priorities as well, even if I can’t act on the latter at present. I’ve never had any trouble before, but ever since we met Annalise, I can’t get anything up without thinking about her. Damn curse.
I circle the camp once again, combing through the surrounding land, slowly widening my path, but I don’t find anything out of the ordinary. Frustrated in more ways than one, I head back to meet the others.
The troupe is preparing for the night when I finally arrive. Li has managed to get Annalise to agree to sleep toward the edge of the clearing.
I move through the forest to join them, not wanting to startle the troupe by cutting through the middle of camp. Annalise begins to massage Li’s feet and I curl up on the blanket to rest, a twinge of jealousy forming in my gut. I don’t know why, perhaps it’s a primal reaction from my beast form, but I wish she were massaging me, playing with my fur and rubbing my body.
My ears twitch and I focus in on the sound of Roan moving closer and open an eye to see what’s happening.
“You bastard,” I say, linking with Roan as he pulls away from his kiss with Annalise.
I was surprised to find I couldn’t link until after the kiss had finished. It was like running headfirst into a stone wall.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
“Exactly what it looks like.”
“Stop before you get us all in trouble.”
Roan breaks the link, but he seems to sense the danger he’s put us in. Annalise’s pheromones are running rampant, triggering my own body to prepare for mating. I center myself in my beast heart, but even so, I’m finding it nearly impossible not to shift and take Annalise then and there myself.
“—Ero would kill me. And you’d never forgive yourself either,” Roan says.
Damn, he’s good. Roan finally removes himself from her and steps away, but even so, as Annalise lies down next to us, it takes all my strength to keep from touching her. It isn’t until she finally falls asleep that I am able to rest as well.
Six
Roan
I lean back against the tree, the calm coolness of the night washing over me. Looking down at Annalise, I smile. I may not have fallen for her the second I saw her, but she’s grown on me. Not that I didn’t want her before, as any man wants a woman, but she’s not quite like any lass I’ve known before. She has the same strong will of the lassies back home, but it’s different somehow. I’m overthinking this. I just like the lass. I’ll figure out all the reasons why later.
I watch her sleep for a moment before I feel a familiar tear in my soul. I snap my eyes shut just as I feel inky tendrils flow through my body. My eyes roll back inside my head as Damien takes control of them. I can feel his presence in my head, as if his eyes have replaced my own and I am fighting for control of my own mind.
His black eyes bore into the backs of my lids and I struggle to keep my eyelids shut. A twig snaps in the distance and my ears ring with the echo.
“There you are,” Damien says before breaking our link.
I double over in exhaustion. He’s more than close.
Damien is here.
Seven
Annalise
My eyes snap open, a cold sweat dripping down my brow as I stare up at the dark, starry night sky. I can see, but I can’t move. I hear Roan gasping for air, but I can’t turn my head to look. There’s a heaviness around us, not unlike the darkness that had tried to take my mind.
“Li,” Roan growls. “Wake up!”
I can feel Li shift beside me, but he groans in his sleep.
The heaviness suddenly lifts from me and I breathe deeply, only to find my breath pushed from my lungs the next moment as a giant paw steps on my chest.
Ero…but it’s not Ero.
I watch in horror as inky black tendrils take over the last remnants of his sapphire eyes. He bares his teeth at me and for the first time, I’m truly frightened of one of my leopards. Dull, soulless eyes bore into mine as he shifts more of his weight onto my chest. My lungs burn from the lack of oxygen. I’m sure my ribcage is about to collapse. I want to yell, but then I hear a scream rise from the far side of the camp.
“Li!” Roan roars.
Li springs up beside me just as Roan launches himself into Ero, sending him flying. Li is already on his feet and has scooped me into his arms, blanket and all. I just manage to catch a glimpse of Ero tearing at Roan’s flesh as Li shoves through the undergrowth and we charge off into the night.
It takes me several minutes to get enough air back into my lungs to speak.
&nb
sp; “Stop! Li, stop!”
Li doesn’t stop.
“We can’t leave them. They’ll kill each other!”
“I know.”
“So, turn around!”
“I can’t.”
“Turn around right this instant,” I say, wiggling in his arms to try and force him to drop me.
Li slows to a stop, but doesn’t release his hold on me.
“Let me down. Now!”
“Hush,” Li growls at me, and something in his tone makes me swallow my tongue.
All I can hear are the quiet sounds of the woods. A breeze rustles through the tops of the trees. Somewhere in the far distance an owl hoots. And then, nothing.
“Li,” I venture.
Li sighs and then looks down at me, his expression full of concern. I turn my face away.
“Annalise, I know you mean well, but sometimes you just need to trust me.”
“How can I trust someone who leaves his friends and a whole family to fend for themselves?”
“You still don’t get it, do you?”
“What is there to get?” I exclaim.
“There’s so much more at stake here than our lives, or the lives of the troupe. Yes, there’s always the chance that Damien may kill them, but as long as he doesn’t get you, it will mean nothing.”
“How can you say that?” I ask, my heart tight in my chest. “How can you say their lives don’t matter?” I don’t know how I could have ever wanted this man.
“You’re misunderstanding me.”
“So, explain,” I say, my eyes flashing as they flicker back to his face.
Li watches me, his eyes searching mine. “Annalise,” Li begins, “I am not so hard-hearted as you think me. Sometimes, as leaders, we have to make choices for the greater good.”
“The greater good,” I scoff.
“Yes. As painful as it may be, the lives that may be lost tonight will pale in comparison to those lost if Damien takes you.”
“I’ll never accept that.”
“Then here we must differ,” Li says softly. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry won’t change what’s happening.”
“I know.”
“Then go back! We have to help them.”
Li lifts his face to stare out into the darkness. “Whatever Damien did, it would be too late to stop it now.”
“I’ll never forgive you if you don’t take me back.”
Li’s jaw tightens. “I’ll have to live with that then. I can’t let anything happen to you, even if you hate me for it.”
My eyes burn from the tears welling up in them. I’m lost for words and my pride is hurt. Li is giving me no say in the matter and I can’t help but feel undermined. How will I ever be a queen if everyone else is forcing my decisions? No. This is unacceptable. Li may have my best interest in mind, and he may have good reasons, but I have just as much of a right to decide what happens as he does.
“I demand you return us to camp, not as Annalise, but as the queen you’ve promised to aid.”
Li looks at me and blinks, trying to process what I’ve just said.
“Did you not promise to help me take back my kingdom?”
“Yes, but this contradicts—”
“No. As queen, I have the right to make my own decisions. I will make mistakes, but I intend to learn from them. I will not be ordered about by anyone…not even you.”
I know the words sting, but Li nods and turns, walking us back toward camp.
I smell the fire even before we see it. My heart sinks in my chest the closer we get. I can’t hear anything besides the loud crackling of flames.
“Put me down.”
Li lowers me to the ground and I walk slowly toward the unearthly glow.
“Prepare yourself,” Li says.
But nothing could have prepared me for what I see. Stepping to the edge of the clearing, I look out over the blazing campsite. My stomach twists as my eyes are drawn to a small mound on the ground.
“No,” I gasp, pushing through the foliage and running over to it.
Falling to my knees beside the body lying on its stomach, I brush the dark hair aside to reveal the face. It’s Lena.
Hot tears spill onto my cheeks as I stare at her in disbelief. My eyes fall to her neck and it’s only now that I see how she was killed. I turn and retch. Li places a hand on my shoulder, but I shake it off. Anger, sadness, and pain mix together in my gut as I lift my eyes to survey the hellish scene before me.
Innocents. Their crime was kindness, and Damien murdered them for it…and Li let him do it!
I jump to my feet, throwing myself at Li, pounding my fists into his chest. He doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even try to stop me. My knees give out and Li catches me, pulling me into his arms as I weep.
Leaves rustle behind us. Li spins around, pushing me behind him, the muscles in his back tense and ready for action. I peer around his side as a dark shape steps out into the clearing.
Li relaxes and I let out a relieved, whimpering sigh. It’s Roan. I push myself from Li and run to him. Roan scoops me into a comforting hug, kissing my head softly.
“I thought you were dead.”
“I’m here, lass.”
“Wo cao,” Li curses in Chinese. “You can’t just sneak up on us like that. Not after something like this.”
“You should know better than to be snuck up on,” Roan says, teasingly.
“I don’t think this is the right time for jokes.”
Roan tenses, shifting uncomfortably. He gently pulls me away from his body and crouches to look me in the eye. “You’re right. How are you coping?”
“I…Wait, where’s Ero?”
“I don’t know. I think he went after the attackers to lead them off in the opposite direction. Now, are you okay?”
“They’re dead…They’re all dead because of me.”
“No, they’re dead because of Damien.”
“We should have helped them. We should have helped you. We shouldn’t have fled.”
“Annalise,” Roan says, “this isn’t your fault. The best chance you had at saving them was to run. We had hoped that by splitting up, Damien and his men would be inclined to chase us, but we were wrong. Whether you had stayed or not, he was intent on harming these people.”
“You knew we would run?” I say.
“I certainly hoped Li wasn’t dumb enough to keep you so close to danger. Although perhaps he is, seeing how I’ve found the two of you right back here in the middle of a burning camp.”
“That’s my fault,” I say with far more conviction than I had anticipated. “I thought we could help.”
“I tried to stay her, but she insisted,” says Li.
“Of course,” Roan says with a shake of his head. “We need to leave. Ero will catch up with us.”
Li nods and then moves to pick me up.
“We can’t just leave,” I say. “What about all of this? What about survivors?”
“Survivors?” Roan says quietly. “Lass, take a good look around. Who could survive this?”
I know he’s right, but something is tugging at the back of my mind.
“We can’t stay to check,” Li says.
“We have to!”
Men’s angry voices can be heard from the other side of the camp.
“They must be coming back, we have to go. Now!” Li says stepping to my side and taking me in his arms before I can protest.
“Sorry, lass. Even if someone did survive, it won’t be for long now,” Roan says as he picks the blanket Li must have dropped earlier off the ground.
And with that, we turn and once again flee into the woods.
I don’t know how long we’ve been running. My eyes are heavy, but I just can’t sleep.
“This will do.”
I find myself lowered to the ground and onto a blanket. Li and Roan drop down beside me, exhausted.
“We must have run fifty miles,” Roan groans.
“I doubt we made it that
far,” Li says. “At least we can finally rest.”
“For now.”
“How will Ero find us?” I say.
“You’d be surprised how easy it is for us to follow your scent,” says Roan.
“Gods, Roan, it’s not my fault I haven’t been able to bathe.”
“That’s not quite what I meant, lass,” Roan says with a smile before closing his eyes to sleep. “Dinna fash about Ero. He’ll find us once he thinks it’s safe. He’ll probably spend the better part of the night trying to confuse Damien’s men and destroy any traces we’ve left. Don’t forget, he’s in his beast form. He’s far faster and more adept at handling things than we are right now.”
I pause, thinking. “So, why didn’t either of you change forms today?”
Li is silent for a moment. “I can’t speak for Roan, but I didn’t think it would do much good to lose the clothes I’ve been given or be unable to easily speak to you. Now, we really need to get some rest.”
“Command me, more like,” I mumble. “You go ahead. I don’t think I can sleep…not yet.”
Li turns over onto his side and closes his eyes. “Don’t hate me, Annalise.”
The comment takes me by surprise. I don’t respond. Yes, I may feel resentment toward him, but I know I don’t hate him. Not really.
I don’t think I could hate any of them.
Li and Roan have only been asleep for about an hour, as far as I can guess. Ero still hasn’t returned, and the sky is starting to grow pale with the coming dawn. I haven’t been able to sleep, the images from earlier cycling through my head like an open-eyed nightmare. I’m not ready to know what my dreams will show me.
I let out an unexpected sob, clamping my hand over my mouth a moment too late.
Li rolls toward me, opening his eyes sleepily. Roan mumbles something and then bolts upright.
“What’s happening?”
“Sorry, it’s just me,” I say.
“It’s not your fault. Time will heal the wound.” Roan yawns, rubbing my back.