Caelin
Heaven Hill Shorts #1
Laramie Briscoe
Thank you to everyone who has read a Heaven Hill book, who has been patient and always wanted more. This is for you!
Thank you to Louise who helps me keep it all together, I’m so thankful you said yes when I asked if you would help me!
Laramie
Contents
Also By Laramie Briscoe
New Release Alerts
Author’s Note
Blurb
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Reviews
Connect With Laramie
Copyright © 2019 Laramie Briscoe
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, distributed, stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, without express permission of the author, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages for review purposes.
This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to any person, living or dead, or any events or occurrences, is purely coincidental. The characters and storylines are created from the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used. Except for review purposes, the reproduction of this book in whole or part, electronically or mechanically, constitutes a copyright violation.
Proofreader: Danielle Wentworth
Cover: Laramie Briscoe
Cover Photography: Carian Cole
Formatting: Laramie Briscoe
Also By Laramie Briscoe
Heaven Hill Series
Meant To Be
Out of Darkness
Losing Control
Worth The Battle
Dirty Little Secret
Second Chance Love
Rough Patch
Beginning of Forever
Home Free
Shield My Heart
A Heaven Hill Christmas
Heaven Hill Next Generation
Hurricane
Wild
Heaven Hill Shorts
Caelin
Christine
Justice
Harley
Jagger
Charity
Liam
Drew
Dalton
Mandy
Rockin’ Country Series
Only The Beginning
One Day at A Time
The Price of Love
Full Circle
Hard To Love
Reaper’s Girl
The Moonshine Task Force Series
Renegade
Tank
Havoc
Ace
Menace
Cruise
Laurel Springs Emergency Response Team
Ransom
Suppression
The MVP Duet
On the DL
MVP
Stand Alones
Sketch
Sass
Trick
Room 143
New Release Alerts
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Author’s Note
Thank you so much for reading my books!
Thank you so much for following this family from Meant To Be until now, and thank you for being such a support in my life!
- Laramie
Blurb
It is recommended that you read "Heaven Hill Generations" before starting this series, or you will be spoiled and lost!
Caelin Blackfoot
I was forced to make an adult decision when Justice Walker was kidnapped by a traitor within our club.
Now I'm dealing with the repercussions of my actions and the blanket of guilt that smothers me from within.
Or am I?
Chapter One
It’s dark inside my room. The way I used to always love it. As a kid, I'd never been scared of the dark. Not in the way everyone else was. One of the things my dad taught me was darkness could lead to an amazing light. It was just on the other side, and all I had to do was wait.
For seventeen years, I believed him.
Until I was forced to make a decision to save a friend, and now I’m struggling with that darkness. It’s threatening to smother me, get rid of all the light. I’ve never been that person who slept with a light on, but now I do. Not that anyone knows, I make sure it’s the light in the bathroom attached to my bedroom. But it gives me just a little bit of a glow. Enough to shine around and make sure there aren’t any monsters.
Now I know monsters aren't under your bed. They're live and in color, around every corner, and in every person you know. That's the biggest lesson I've learned this year, and I'm not sure I'm going to ever be able to forget it.
“Do you have everything you need for school?” Mom asks, as I sit at the breakfast bar, wolfing down the scrambled eggs and bacon she made me.
No matter what, Meredith Blackfoot makes sure I’m sent off with a very full stomach.
“Yeah, it’s only half a day today for most of the school, I’m hoping I’m part of it, some sort of teacher in-service. I’ll be heading out to the clubhouse later. I’m still trying to figure out everything he did.”
He is Travis Steele. The person who sent us all into a tailspin when he decided to betray the club. Not only the club, but everyone in it. The two of us tense, as everyone always does when he’s mentioned. Two months later and we still aren’t sure how to handle the whole situation. Most of us are angry while the rest of us are just trying to live our lives.
“You know you don’t have to, right?” Her voice is soft. “No one would blame you if you can’t take it. At least I wouldn’t blame you,” she puts more eggs on my plate.
“I know, Mom, but the club needs me, and I want to feel needed.”
“Do you?” She sits down next to me. “Do you really? Is this your dream, Caelin? If it’s not, there’s absolutely no shame in admitting it.”
“I want Dad to be proud of me,” I take a bite of the bacon.
“You have to know he’s proud of you no matter what you do,” she pushes.
I do know that, but I’m having issues on being proud of myself. Even though I saved Justice, I still feel as if I could have done more. If they had come to me earlier, maybe I could have prevented the whole thing.
Mom is watching me, and it’s like her eyes know everything I’m thinking. Like she can read my mind before I even say a word.
“You’re too damn much like your dad, Caelin. Just remember you don’t always have to be the strong one,” she gives me the rest of my food and then leaves the kitchen.
I’ve always had an appetite. Up until two months ago, that is. It was ruined right around the time I shot Travis Steele through the neck. Right around the time Justice and I started texting daily. She’s not doing well, about as well as me, and just like me, she’s scared to tell her family.
Because I know Mom will be checking, I force myself to eat as much as I can, and then toss the rest in the trashcan. Right now, I wish we’d gotten that pet Addie and I asked for, for so long. At least then I could hide how much I’m not eating. Checking the clock, I realize I’ll be late for school if I don’t leave now.
My bike. It’s my favorite place to be if I’m not with my family. Last year Dad helped me bu
ild it, and I’ve been proud of it ever since. Sometimes it’s my best friend, the only thing that doesn’t ask questions or let me down. The air going through my long hair is exactly what I need to feel as I drive towards the high school.
I feel so much older than all these kids. I have responsibilities that most of them have never even fucking thought of. I can guarantee the rest of them aren’t prospecting for the Heaven Hill MC. Of course I can’t wear my cut at school, but I do wear it most of the time, and I guess it is cool I don’t have to do the stupid shit most prospects have to.
Remy keeps telling me I’m lucky. But I don’t feel lucky. Fuck if I don’t feel stuck right now. I always imagined this shit would be my choice. I’d decide to follow in Dad’s footsteps with a huge amount of fanfare, not in a blaze of glory that saw me murdering the former IT expert of the club. I still can’t get his face out of my mind. Nobody told me when that would happen either.
I’m half-tempted to talk to Doc Jones. At least she would understand, and I know I can trust her. Dad trusts her, and he trusts no one. That’s my next step if I can’t sleep through the night soon; there’s only so much of these damn dreams I can take.
Walking into the school, I sigh heavily. Immediately eyes focus on me and conversations stop. It’s been like this since it was found out I was fucking a teacher. Not one of my prouder moments, but damn it was fun. Neither of my parents thought it was fun, but I’ve been getting female attention since I was thirteen, and now that I have my bike? It’s ridiculous.
The gazes follow me to my locker, watching every move I make. I wonder a lot about what they expect me to do. Am I supposed to drop my jeans, or maybe flash them a smile that shows the dimple in my cheek?
“Hey Caelin,” I hear a feminine voice beside me.
Long hair is a blessing when you want to ignore everything and everyone around you. But this voice I can’t ignore. She’s the coach’s daughter and she’s one of the only people who doesn’t treat me like a piece of meat.
“Hey,” I answer back, pushing my hair out of my face. “What’s up?”
“You quit the football team?” Her voice sounds pained.
“Look Jules, I’ve just got a lot of shit going on right now,” I do my best to apologize to her with my tone. There’s no way in hell I want to bring anyone else into the fuckedupness that is my life right now.
“Well so does my dad, Cae. They’re gonna fire him if we don’t win state this year.”
I wish that were the worst of my problems.
“Don’t you think you could come back? Just this season, Caelin,” she sticks out her bottom lip in a move I’ve never seen her do before. Other cheerleaders and other girls? Yeah. Jules? Never.
“Jules,” her name is a sigh. “I have a lot of personal shit,” I try again.
“I would consider it a huge personal favor,” she runs her finger down my stomach, hooking it in the waistband of my jeans, pulling.
Grabbing hold of her hand, I grip it tightly. My other hand coming up to hold her chin in the palm of my hand. Her head is tilted back and she’s looking at me with her huge green eyes. “Jules, honey, this isn’t you. Don’t hand something over to me you’ll never be able to get back.”
Immediately I know I’ve not only offended but also upset her. It’s in the way tears gather in the depths of her eyes, the way her skin blotches a deep red. “How dare you?” She hisses. “I’m offering you my virginity on a silver platter, Caelin.”
This shit pisses me off, it’s what I get for trying to be nice. For trying to explain to people who have no idea how much fucking pressure I’m feeling.
I turn from her, slamming the door to my locker before I turn back. “And I’m telling you, Julie. Your virginity isn’t something I want.”
She slaps me hard across the face. The hallway goes silent as the two of us stare at one another.
“Go to hell, Caelin.”
I don’t even look at the faces of the people staring at us, I just walk to my first class, mumbling under my breath. “Already there sweetheart, already there.”
Chapter Two
Eyes are on me from every direction. Again, I can feel them. Most people are at least polite enough to avert their eyes when I catch them looking, but a few want to try me.
This anger, pain, and frustration aren't who I am. It's not who I've ever been, but it eats at me, making me wonder who to trust in this crazy ass world and if I'll ever be normal again.
“You know, you could smile once in a while.”
Those words come from one of the only people whose stood beside me as I’ve gone from happy-go-lucky jokester to the serious person I am now. Casen’s dad is a cop, but he doesn’t seem to care who I’m affiliated with. Together we played on the football team. His quarterback arm always made sure to pass to my fast running back feet. Something happened to him this year too. He quit football around the same time I did. The only difference is, he hides his pain from the world.
“Like you?” I take a drink of the milk I got with my lunch. “Hide behind a fake one and pretend everything’s completely okay when it’s not? That’s not who I am.”
“You don’t always have to be who you think you are, Caelin. Sometimes you can be more, other times you can be less. You don’t always have to walk around here with a scowl on your face. It’s okay to smile.”
But is it? I’m having a hard time coming to grips with what I did. I feel like my mom looks at me differently, and I know the men of the club do. There’s an air of respect coming from them I didn’t have before. To some it would be almost intoxicating, for me right now it’s smothering. And then there’s Justice. We text almost every day now, and she asks me questions I just don’t have the answers to. Most days I don’t know if I’m coming or going, and it’s seriously starting to fuck with my brain.
“I’ll remember that,” I take a huge bite of the pizza on my tray, hoping that puts an end to the conversation.
It doesn’t taste great, but then nothing from a high school lunch counter ever does. Once I took pleasure in food though, today isn’t one of those days. Fuck, I’m a melancholic fucker, and I hate being surrounded by all these kids.
Even though we’re the same age, I feel so much older than the rest of them. Honestly, I always have, but this is different, a separation I’m not sure I’ll be able to overcome. Looking at the clock in the cafeteria, I see it’s eleven in the morning. Fuck it, I can’t take this anymore.
Getting up without a word, I take my tray to the trashcan, throw away my half-eaten food and head for the entrance. Once I’m in the hallway outside of the cafeteria, my motorcycle boots thunder in the echoey stillness. Once at my locker, I open it with ingrained motions. These days, unlike my first day of high school, I don’t think about my combination. It’s second-nature to me, if someone asked, I probably wouldn’t even be able to tell them the numbers. Spinning it, I unlock the mechanism, reach in and take out my jacket.
For a split second, I think about what I’m doing. Then I think fuck it. Putting the jacket on, I dump all my school shit, put my aviators on and strut like I own the place to the exit. The look on my face dares some fucker to stop me. Then I hear it.
“Caelin Blackfoot, where are you going?”
It’s the coach. Someone who’d been important to me in the before, but not necessarily the after. Especially since his daughter propositioned me today.
“Home,” I answer, no doubt in my voice.
“You can’t leave school property.”
“Watch me.”
Defiant hasn’t been my shtick for long, but fuck if I don’t own it. Almost like I was born to do it.
“Caelin, I can’t let you.”
My eyes meet his and I dare him to stop me. I pull out my one ace in the hole, even though I hate to get her involved in this. I can't stay here anymore today. "Talk to Mrs. Stone about it, she'll verify she gave me permission."
He looks like he wants to call me on my bullshit, but he doesn’t stop me as
I leave, thankfully. As I leave the dimly lit school into the brightness of the world, my spirit lifts. Breathing in fresh air that’s not been recirculated amongst an entire building does me good. It makes me feel alive, not dead like Travis Steele was on the floor of that building. The sunlight hits my back, heating me up, but I welcome it, another instance of the world letting me know I’m alive. I gather my hair up at the nape of my neck, securing it with a hair tie I keep for hot days like this. By the time I get to my bike, it’s up, my neck already starting to cool. Within seconds, I’m on the back of my bike spitting gravel from the over-flow parking lot at my high school. With a squeal of my tires, I go straight out onto Louisville Road, zero to sixty-five in faster than should be legal.
But finally, with the wind in my hair, sun at my back, I feel free. I can breathe easier, and I don’t feel like I’m a fucking science project that somebody worries will blow at any time. For a short time I feel like Caelin, and only Caelin.
I end up at CRISIS, and I’m not sure why. For most everything my first stop is usually my dad, but today I want to see someone else. Her car is parked in the lot, so I know she’s there. Luckily another car is gone, and I give out a sigh of relief. I park beside her car, and then walk up the steps, putting in my code before going inside. Nobody’s at the front desk, which doesn’t surprise me.
Caelin (Heaven Hill Shorts Book 1) Page 1