by Jayne Blue
The Judge was sensitive to my need to design. The apartment was on the top floor. It was an old warehouse, I had the corner. I had light on all sides. And I had the supplies I needed.
All of it came from The Judge. Once Daddy had “given” me to him, he took care of me. He got me what I needed. And I was supposed to return that favor.
The first time we were alone in the apartment The Judge sat me down on the couch I’d picked out, and he had paid for. He’d let me pick everything. He’d also kept me away from Daddy. I had expressed my fear of the club to The Judge, I told them that I knew that they would hurt me, and that was all it took. The Judge was going to be sure I was safe and tucked away. His own doll.
“I don’t want you in their company. It doesn’t look good for a judge’s wife.”
The Judge it turned out was a proper pervert. And he was a man. I learned that too. We sat on the couch the first day, and he told me what he wanted.
“First, just let me see you. We won’t do anything you don’t want to do.”
So he brought his hand, the skin looked old and spotted next to mine, up to the strap of my dress. He’s asked I not wear buttons. He liked zippers and straps but no buttons. When I saw the joints of his fingers, it was easy to see why.
I sat facing him on the couch, and he slid one strap down over my shoulder. Reflexively I put one hand over my breast. He smiled and then slid the other strap down my other hand went up. I’d not worn a bra. A mistake I realized now when it was clear where this was going. I held the front of my dress to my breasts. And The Judge was mesmerized by them.
“I promise we won’t do anything you don’t want. Now please, if you want to, of course, put your hands behind you on the couch. Your Daddy promised you were very willing to please me.” I wanted to throw up. I was shaking. Scared. Ashamed. But I had made a deal. I thought of what I’d seen so far with Daddy and knew I could take it.
Slowly I removed one hand, and the fabric on that side floated down. My breast was exposed to The Judge.
“Good girl. Very good girl. Now go on. The other side. If you can.” His eyes stayed on my naked breast, and I did as he said. I moveed the other hand. I was exposed topless and quivering.
“I like the shaking. It looks lovely. Stand in front of me darling. I can’t lean in. Bad knees you know.” I stood up and did as he asked. My breasts now level with his face. He put his hands, on each side of my breasts and cupped them. His palms were cold and dry. The cold had the effect The Judge seemed to want. I started to slowly understand how I could hypnotize the all-powerful Judge.
“Be still for me darling.” And he leaned in, I felt his lips, and gray stubble above it, slide over my nipple. He sucked on one nipple, gently, his lips covering his false teeth. Then he released the nipple and pushed the other into his mouth. He kept his mouth on my nipples one and then the other.
“Delicious. Delicious darling,” he said. I put my hand on his head. His gray hair like cobwebs through my fingers. While his lips and eyes stayed on my breasts, his hands slowly worked my dress down around my hips. I was close to being completely naked but not quite. I wondered if this would be it. Would we have sex this first time? I had thought I could stall. My mind raced. How would I handle more than this? Should I think of Ryder? Should I try to enjoy it? I didn’t have the first clue. I thought enduring it quietly would be all I could muster.
“Delicious darling,” he said again and kept his hands on my hips and finally released my nipples from his sucking. I had no idea how long it had gone on in reality, but it felt like he had sucked on them forever. Like I was his food. I felt dirty. But I hid it. This was it. He’d for sure want to try to.. I stopped thinking about it.
“Now put your hand here.” The Judge took my hand and put it in his lap. I was afraid of what I would feel. It wasn’t what I expected.
At all.
My eyes went wide.
“Yes, that’s the truth. The sad truth. I cannot, an old injury, old age, I have very little going on there I’m afraid. My douche son is adopted. Hmm. Come back here.” I leaned in again, and he ran his fingers over my belly like I was an object he was inspecting. This was getting stranger and stranger.
“You are a sweet young thing, and I deserve you. I’m seeing the best doctor. A new doctor. He’s very impressed that I have a sweet young thing willing to help me in that department. Very hopeful I can fill you up on our wedding night.”
“Oh, well. I’m not sure what to say or, uh, do.” Which was entirely true. I had no idea.
“You will wear the pretty things I buy you. And help me take them off you. And maybe on our wedding night, if my doctor can find the right meds without killing my heart, I’ll make love to you. Until then though I’m going to touch, touch, touch, but never spoil your purity. Your Daddy told me you’re a virgin, and I approve.”
My purity? Daddy had really gone all out here.
“How long will that be? Until our wedding, do you think?”
“Well if we want it proper and in the papers, we’ll need to plan it.”
“Yes, Richard. I want it to be like in the magazines. Can I?” Asking a seventy-year-old pervert a question while topless is a way to get a sure yes. I was learning fast.
“Whatever you want delicious doll,” he said and sank his lips to my breasts again. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried not to think about what might happen after the old man had meds.
I had no date. But I had some time. Thanks to biology and God knew what injury.
That was the start of our little game. Since then about once a month, The Judge would engage in this little dance. He’d watch, he’d suck, he’d fall the fuck asleep. In between times he’d parade me around to his friends.
I could survive it. I was surviving it.
Goddamnit, why did Ryder have to be here?
The Judge dropped me off at the apartment but didn’t come in. I was so grateful for that I could have cried.
I needed to be alone. I needed to process where I was and what was happening.
Ryder.
My little world of lies and sacrifice was going to crumble if I also had to see Ryder.
I went to bed. The last thing I could remember was crying. I slipped into dreams. The dreams where Ryder was there. But just out of reach.
Chapter Fifteen
Ryder
I did not have a good night. Ridge and Cruz teamed up to get me out of the Wheelhouse. One on each side, they practically carried me out of there. Just in time, by the way, to see Jules get in the car with The Judge.
I needed to punch something. Tear something up. Do damage. I felt uncontrollable and furious.
What was she doing here? In Michigan. Engaged again? Was she the biggest liar in the fucking word? Was I the biggest idiot? Great Wolves Southwood did not have an MMA gym. I could have used that. Instead, I made a fucking mess of a store room. I knocked shit down. Broke shit and in the end didn’t stop until I was exhausted on the floor. At some point, I fell asleep because I woke up to the door opening and Bret’s sarcasm.
“A lot of drama over Jules Maldonado I see.”
“Fuck you.”
“Such language from our esteemed mentor.” I looked at the mess I’d made.
“Give me an hour to get this shit together.”
“Forget it. I’ll send a few probies in. You need to get some coffee.” Bret put a hand out to me and yanked me up off the floor. We walked to the office, and I tried to push the shame of my outburst to the back of my head. I was supposed to be guiding this chapter, and I lost my shit. Massively.
“So you know Jules.”
“Yeah, she’s a friend. I guess.”
“A friend?”
“Well, old friend. We were junior high besties before I dropped out and decided to become a tortured runaway.”
“You friends now?”
“Uh, no. It was the Devil’s Hawks that introduced me to my first hit. I stay far away from those fuckers.”
“Did Jules?
Was she the one who got you hooked?” It didn’t seem possible, but I clearly didn’t know much about Jules.
“Oh, hell no. One of the young guys in the club. Jules daddy kept her in a glass cage. She went to school, got good grades, was the prom queen. All that shit.”
“And then college.”
“So what’s your deal. Why’d you go berserk when you saw her?”
“You realize she ran away from a wedding?”
“Yeah, she was supposed to marry the son but traded up it looks like for the old man. He’s got her in a cool loft downtown I heard.”
“That’s Judge Wexler, David Wexler’s dad?” I was trying to piece it together.
“Yep. I did hear she broke it off from David. Good thing. That guy is a weak asshole. At least The Judge has balls.” Bret handed me a Styrofoam cup filled to the top with hot black coffee. It scalded my tongue. Just what I needed.
“I met Jules when she was sprinting at breakneck speed away from the church in her wedding dress.”
“So naturally you thought this is good relationship material.”
I laughed out loud. She was so fucking right. I’d met a runaway bride on the side of the road and expected some non-insane ending to that.
“Yeah, we had a few great days. And then I put her on a bus going west. She told me she was going to get away from her Dad and Devil’s Hawks. I hadn’t heard from her in six months.”
“Well brother she’s been here for six months and as far as I know engaged to The Judge. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen them together. He’s really proud of his young piece of ass.”
“Hey.”
“Well? What?”
“Nothing.”
“So there you go. She left you for an older rich man. Not too original.”
“So you know where this loft is?”
“Yeah. uh no.”
“You’re going to take me there.”
“The fuck I am.”
“Why not?”
“Number one she’s the daughter of Sonny Maldonado, Devil’s Hawk king asshole. Number two she’s banging The Judge, who’s in charge of my probation for my possession conviction. Number three you just tore up an entire room after talking to her for less than a minute.”
“And your point?”
“My point is no. We need you to help us not get arrested or killed for talking to a woman who has no interest in you.”
“You think that’s true?” Maybe Bret was right. I was reading into everything. Jules and I’s time together. How she looked at me last night… everything.
Bret stared at me for a few seconds.
“No. I don’t. I think she looked at you last night like you looked at her.”
“Which is how?”
“Like you wanted to jump all over each other. Which is exactly why I’m not taking you to her place.” Bret turned and walked out to the garage.
I didn’t need Bret to do a damn thing. It wasn’t over between Jules and me. I had questions, and she was going to damn well answer them.
I needed to get to her, confront her, and ask her what the hell happened? I would probably get my gut kicked in for it, but I had to know.
I had my eyes open for her now I’d find her easy in this small town. A cool loft downtown. That’s what Bret had said before she declared she wasn’t helping me.
I looked around the garage. Looked to me like we needed office supplies or a computer printer or some shit. I was going to be in downtown Southwood as much as possible until I found Jules again.
I was hatching my stalking plan when Ridge and Cruz interrupted.
“One of our new security clients called. They were robbed,” Cruz explained.
“Shit. Under our noses? What the fuck?”
“Worse, it’s more like thumbing a nose,” Cruz said.
“Let’s check it out,” Ridge said, and we headed to the local hardware store that had just signed up for Great Wolves Security services.
“This is what I can expect?” The owner of Southwood Do It Better Hardware, Tom Oswald, was pissed.
He was a man in his fifties, skinny, nervous, and mad. He had a right to be.
Shelves were dumped over, a back door wrenched open, and the cash drawer was empty.
“Did they get a lot?” Cruz asked.
“Not really. I had already been to the bank. But look. Look!” On the front display, there was a message for us. Spray painted on the brick it said Great Wolves Security Sign Up Today! The message was clear, and in red, and in the fucking brick.
“It’s the Goddamn Hawks. They don’t want us dealing with you.” Oswald was looking more nervous by the second.
“You want to keep dealing with them?” Cruz said.
“Devil’s Hawks have been raping this store since I started. They demand cash from me and then they want me to launder their money. All of here in town would rather have Great Wolves instead of Hawks. But I can’t have this.”
“You’re right.” I stepped in.
“Who are you?” Oswald asked.
“Ryder, Great Wolves MC out of Grand City.”
“So what are you going to do about it?” Oswald directed his question to me.
“We’ll beef up,” I told him. I didn’t know how but if Great Wolves Security was going to protect Southwood we couldn’t let another incident like this happen.
“You damn well better, or I’m going to shut this down and move to Florida. My brother has a store in Gold Cross. I hear it’s nice.” Oswald left us while muttering about getting out of Michigan and then directed his employees on clean up.
“So how are we going to beef up?” Cruz had a valid point. Southwood’s MC didn’t have that many extra bodies.
“We’re all on it. Polk, Nero, Bret, and me. Devil’s Hawks are trying to crush you. Time to stop that shit.” I said.
“Agreed.” Ridge chimed in. The garage could wait. Great Wolves wouldn’t get anywhere here if Devil’s Hawks could walk all over them.
“And I’m going to help get this off the damn wall.” Fuck you Devil’s Hawks and your bullshit graffiti. Juvenile crap.
We had convinced Oswald we could protect his business. That meant pitching in when shit went down. Ridge and I had Great Wolves pride to protect. If Devil’s Hawks wanted to send a message, we’d send one right back.
Ridge and I power washed and scraped for the rest of the day. Three times I saw Hawks bikers drive by. They were taking note to send back to Jules Daddy. Fine. Take my fucking picture for all I cared. Great Wolves were staying in Southwood, and they could suck my dick.
Then it happened. Jules.
She came around a corner and was headed for the sidewalk where Ridge and I were working. She wore tight jeans a leather jacket and boots. I took in every inch of her. She looked beautiful but in a hurry or distracted. She carried two bags and didn’t see me at first.
When she did look up, she stopped. She’d have to walk by me if she stayed on her current path. She’d decided against it and darted across the street.
“I’ll be back.” And I handed Ridge the power washer made a b-line for Jules.
She had stepped up her pace and was already to a door of a building and had darted in. But her little legs were nothing compared to my stride, and I closed the distance.
I entered a lobby with metal mail slots and buzzers. No doorman or desk. My eyes adjusted and there she was at an elevator door that opened. She saw me and darted in.
I got my boot in the elevator as she backed into the corner of it.
“Shit,” she said.
“Floor?”
Jules looked at me and didn’t say a word.
“I can just push all the buttons.” There were five stories to this building.
“P.”
“Oh, penthouse. How very nice for you.” I pushed the “P” button. The doors closed, and I closed in. I stepped directly into her space.
“So, The Judge put you up here in the penthouse suite? He up there waiting for you?” I
was mean. I was angry. And I was in her face.
“It’s not like that.”
“Really? Why don’t you explain?” Jules’s eyes darted around.
“I don’t owe you anything.” She jutted her jaw out. The elevator reached her floor and opened straight into her loft. It looked pretty damn nice. It was all open. No walls. I even noticed a workspace.
Jules sidestepped me, and I followed her.
“You don’t? Didn’t I help you run away? Kind of stuck my neck out if I remember.”
She walked to the kitchen area and put down her bags.
“I didn’t ask you up here. Please get out.” I’d thrown her off balance that was something.
“Let me help you with the groceries.” I walked into the kitchen, and she stepped out of it. She was trying to keep her distance, and I was trying to close it. I wanted to touch her. I wanted to shake her.
Instead, I grabbed a carton of almond milk and put it in her fancy refrigerator.
“Ryder you can’t be here.” She had turned from agitated to pleading. It was getting to me. In the end, I didn’t want to hurt her or make her cry. Dammit. I felt everything for her, and she wanted me out.
“Fine. Answer me a question and I’ll get out.”
She exhaled and leaned on the back of her couch.
“What. What do you want?”
I stepped forward again and this time, she didn’t run away, but she held her breath. I could smell her. I wanted her, hard.
“I want to know why you’ve been here the whole time. Did you lie to me from the beginning? Was I basically a quick ride and easy fuck to you?”
She flinched when I said it. Jules lifted her eyes slowly and locked with mine. She swallowed.
“Yes. I used you until I didn’t need to anymore.” Her lips were drawn in a tight line.
“Oh really?” I didn’t have a smart answer. But my anger and desire were bubbling up and choking me. I raised my hand, and she closed her eyes. Maybe she thought I was going to hit her. I wasn’t. I’d never hit a woman and never would. I did run my knuckle lightly across her soft cheek. Damn her.
“You said you’d leave.”
“Yes, I did.” We stood there less than an inch apart. She’d confirmed that she was a cold-hearted bitch, and I was an idiot who thought with his dick.