The first clown tried to cut in. The audience was clapping to the Latin beat. One of the blue and yellow fairies danced with her, and then she danced with a large sea creature of some sort wearing a tall headdress with bright shades of purple and red.
Her original suitor presented himself and she took his arm as he led her in the direction of her seat to enormous audience applause. He stopped her, bowed to her, encouraged the audience to clap louder, and let her share the moment. She couldn’t see any of the faces of the two balconies above, but she was awash in the flash of lights from everywhere.
She wondered if Gerud had also arranged this reception. She bowed to the audience again and then resumed the processional to her seat, the other clowns and fairies in tow behind her.
Of course, just as they were coming upon her section, she saw Jake and Gerud seated just behind where she and Karen sat. Jake looked like he’d seen the Virgin Mary or some such thing.
The clown air-kissed her on both cheeks, as did the rest of the entourage before she sat down to thunderous applause.
She felt Jake’s presence directly behind her and glanced up to her left, catching a wink from Gerud. She immediately faced the stage as the lights went dim and the performance music began.
“I’ve never seen you so radiant, Ginger. You took my breath away,” came the voice she knew so well.
She turned her head in profile and said across the aisle, not facing him, “Thank you, Jake. What a nice surprise.”
“Yes, it is.”
Karen grabbed her hand, and the show was off to a magnificent start.
If someone had asked her what the performance was like, she wouldn’t have been able to tell them about any costumes or acts, except the look of the three clowns and half dozen fairies she’d danced with. She could tell anyone the color of the velvet seats: burgundy. She could tell someone that fleur d’lise patterns were stitched into the carpeting that went up the aisle. The stage was a light tan canvas, tiny markings drawn in it only the dancers could see. She could tell you about the purple glove of the first clown, or that his eyes were green as emeralds and he had lots of chest hair that extended up over his red and white striped shirt.
And he smelled nice. And streaked his face paint with sweat.
But she could also tell anyone what it felt like to sit in front of the man she loved, had always loved and hoped to win back again. She was a wicked woman on a mission to lure him back to her. She’d been planning the takedown ever since she’d heard Jake’s newborn had arrived and he and Monica were fighting constantly. Her ex-mother-in-law made sure she understood that Monica was all wrong for her son. Ginger got good at laughing it off, even while her girls longingly looked up to her just to check and see if there was a chance Daddy would be coming home to stay.
All had been artfully planned. She’d waited too long the first time and missed Jake in his flurry to get married and thought she’d lost him forever. Monica was the result of a weekend in Mexico that lingered for two years.
But this was her time. She would make him see the error of his ways. She would have him back if it was the last honest, or perhaps dishonest, thing she did. She could play stealth and execute a plan just as well as any of the SEALs on Team 3, maybe better. They had no idea what five years of regret had wrought. And if this didn’t work, so be it. She’d go on and have a good life with her daughters and would do her best to bury Jake in the cemetery of her lost dreams.
This little clown parade had helped. Oh God! It had helped. She owed a lot to Gerud, who had been the one with all the ideas. She’d find some way to repay him for giving her the one thing she wanted: a chance with Jake again.
Intermission came quickly. As she turned, expecting Jake to avert his gaze like he always did when she’d drop the girls off or he brought them home, this time, he just examined her directly, like he was seeing her for the first time.
Gerud was asking if they wanted some champagne. Karen was all for it. Ginger shrugged. Just being in Jake’s proximity was refreshment enough, but she said, “Sure.”
The four of them walked up the aisle, Karen and Gerud in rapid conversation with sprinkled laughter thrown in. He turned several times to wink at her, and she showed her appreciation with her best smile.
The plan had been to make Jake jealous by being a little flirtatious. They were to go dancing afterwards, and Gerud would show him how much he admired his ex. All she had to do was not look at Jake very much, avoid his eye contact if she could, make him want to stare her down, take her away from Gerud. Jake’s brother was a genius at reading people. He knew exactly how she felt about it and how desperate she was to get Jake back into her life.
And it was a miracle Gerud had agreed to help!
They had to ease their way through a throng of people on their way to the bar. Several couples stopped her and commented on how talented she was on the stage, asking about her hair color, if she was part of the cast or just a bystander or audience member.
The questions came so fast, she didn’t have time to answer them in order. Finally, Jake took her hand and dragged her toward Gerud and Karen by the bar.
“Ginger’s got all the attention tonight, Jake.” Gerud said. He put his arm around her waist, pulled her to his side away from Jake and planted a kiss on her cheek.
This made her blush. Karen giggled. Jake turned his head stiffly like a robot and stared at his brother.
Gerud handed her a glass of pink champagne, matching Karen’s and his own, and asked Jake if he wanted something.
“Water,” he said, his voice gravely. He extended his left hand and that’s when Ginger noticed his wedding ring.
She knew Gerud had placed it on his finger, but she was supposed to act surprised, and more than a little disappointed.
She leaned into Gerud closer, “Congratulations, Jake. You didn’t wait very long this time.”
Jake pulled back his hand without taking the water, as if he’d burned it. He adjusted his sleeve over the still-swollen wound from the red ribbon sashes.
She knew he would be at a loss for words. That was the plan. Ginger knew there was no real marriage or wife, but she thought she would enjoy watching Jake squirm, trying to figure out what to say to her. But his wrist injury had her distance herself from Gerud’s embrace.
“What’s the matter with your hand? Did you injure it?” she asked.
Jake scanned from Gerud to Karen and back to Ginger again before he’d answer. His happy mood had soured. Ginger was concerned.
“Just another case of bad judgment, I guess. Isn’t that all what you’re used to from me?” His right eye twitched. He walked away from them, into the crowd.
Ginger was crestfallen.
“What is that—that—red mark on his wrist?” She alternated between Karen and Gerud. Karen shrugged. But Gerud hung his head.
“I improvised.”
“What did you do?”
“I added a little bondage scene to his pass out.”
“You did what?”
“I tied up his wrist, well, both his wrists, to the bedframe. I thought they were loose enough he’d get them undone and then fall asleep. But apparently I was more thorough than I thought. He must have slept that way.”
“Gerud, that’s terrible!”
“Ginger, I’m sorry. I guess part of me was concerned he’d fall off the bed.”
She could see even he didn’t buy the excuse. And now she had a problem. She had to tell Jake. She had to take responsibility for what their plan had hatched. What had started as a fun caper—though she’d never been totally comfortable with the sleeping pills—what she thought would be a joke they could laugh about turned out to be something much more. He could have been seriously injured.
What was she thinking?
“Ginger,” Gerud grabbed her arm but she wrestled free.
“I have to tell him, Gerud. This isn’t right.”
“And if you do, everyone in the family will know. Your parents, your girls. Every
one.”
“But I didn’t do this!”
“No, but you were an accomplice.”
“Not really. I didn’t expect he’d get hurt! What were you thinking?”
“That you’d do anything to get back with Jake. You even told me so several times. Desperate was the word you used, I believe.”
Karen was looking down at her feet. Other patrons were pushing past, trying for a spot at the bar, annoyed they were taking up space. The three moved out into a corner. Ginger watched Jake standing near the entrance and thought perhaps he was going to bolt. She felt horrible, and tears began to collect in her eyes.
Karen put her arm around her shoulder. “Go to him. Just go talk to him, Ginger. He seemed interested, earlier.”
With a last minute death stare at Gerud, Ginger did just that. Just as she got close, Jake started for the exit.
“Jake, wait a minute! Can I talk to you?”
His scowl was familiar to her. It was the expression she saw most often in their last days together, just before their breakup.
“So you and Gerud, huh?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You let him get his hands all over you? How long have you been fucking my brother, Ginger, Miss High and Mighty?”
“I’m not sleeping with your brother, Jake.”
“I didn’t say sleeping with him. I said fucking him.”
“That’s unfair. I’m not.”
He put his fingers to his eyes and squeezed them. “God. Can’t do anything right.”
“Look, can we just go somewhere and talk? I’d really like to just talk to you.”
“Is that what this, this setup is, then? You and Karen getting tickets right in front of me and Gerud?”
She tossed her head and agreed. “Yes.”
“Your little dance on stage?”
“No! That was just coincidence. I don’t know how they found me. They just pick people from the audience, Jake. Honest, I had nothing to do with that. I have no clue how come they picked me.”
His eyes roamed over her body, scanning her neckline, up to her eyes, then focusing on her lips. “Probably because of how beautiful you look tonight.”
Tears pushed up and spilled over her lower lids as her cheeks flushed. He’d not said that for years. They were words she’d wanted to hear ever since the day he’d left.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I didn’t mean to—”
“Didn’t mean to what? Cause me discomfort? How in the world would you think you telling me I’m beautiful would cause me any degree of pain, Jake?”
The air cleared for thirty seconds as they gazed straight into each other’s eyes, unlike anything they’d done since the breakup.
“Okay, are we set to go back?” Gerud’s voice cut through the moment like Monica’s ax.
“You know? I’m going to go have a cup of coffee,” said Jake, avoiding eye contact. “Would you excuse me?” He followed up with a half grin that looked more like a grimace.
“I understand the grand burlesque scene at the end is a showstopper, Jake. Don’t want to miss it!” Gerud seemed unaffected by his huge blunder. Ginger feared he didn’t even feel remorse.
“No thanks.” Jake held up his hand. He glanced back and smiled. “Nice to see you again, Ginger.”
Her heart melted. As he turned, she caught his arm. She’d come all this way, had made a terrible mistake in doing so, but she was still on her mission. It was still the right thing, done the wrong way, but still the only thing that mattered to her anymore. She risked appearing needy, but she knew deep down inside she it was the honest truth. She was so crazy in love with her ex, she’d swallow her pride and take her chances, because not doing anything left only one outcome.
His face showed surprise.
“You want some company, Jake?”
He glanced up at Gerud and Karen and then returned to her. “I’m not very good company this evening, Ginger. Kind of been a rough few hours.”
“Let me be the judge of that.” She had to add, “But you decide.”
“Well, sure, I guess we could get a Starbuck’s. They’re right across the street.”
She noted Gerud looked like the life had been sucked out of him. Without expression, he turned. Karen waved and nervously followed him back into the theater as the call came.
She was alone with Jake at last. The timing was all wrong. So much of this evening was all wrong. She regretted everything she’d done, been a part of, and even regretted that she had felt so desperate. All her old fears about not being worthy enough for Jake and his bravery and not being strong enough for his demons, came haunting her once again.
She brushed those thoughts aside, grabbed his hand, and led him out into the Las Vegas night air. For coffee. For a chance. Just a chance. And if it failed, well there was the life she’d been living before, raising his girls, teaching them to honor their father, and looking for a partner who would never measure up to Jake, flaws and all. She’d have to make do with that, but only after she went for the brass ring and hoped she didn’t fall off the horse.
Chapter 5
Jake ordered them both lattes, without checking with Ginger first, because he knew her that well. He still remembered what she liked. He understood more about her than she even realized. He’d thought more about her over the years than he wanted to admit to anyone.
Boy, did he need a drink. But the latte was reassuringly warm in his hands as he shuffled to the corner table with his ex looking fine in that beautiful peachy-orange glow she always seemed to have. She’d been a ray of sunshine in his life at one time. He’d very nearly put that light out, and he figured she’d been much better off, the girls, too, with him gone.
“Here you go. Hope you don’t mind I didn’t ask you.”
She studied him with those green eyes of hers, those honest eyes that didn’t miss a thing. That was always the thing with her. She saw everything about him. Noticed everything. Everything meant something to her. The intense flame that was her honesty was still there, in that commanding beauty he finally couldn’t take.
“Thank you.”
Again, she stared.
“So, here we are, Ginger. What did you want to talk about?”
She broke off and followed her finger rimming the top of the latte cup, dipping in the foam and making a mockery of his heart. She had no right to hold such a claim on him, but she did. Her smooth flesh was moist from the humid coffee shop lobby, the cleavage between her breasts heaving and settling, her hair of spun fibers of orange framing her face in a new cut that featured her jaw and cheekbones. Her lips were pale pink with a hint of rose from the lip-gloss she liked to use, not the heavy lipstick the showgirls sported. It made her lips the color of other parts of her he’d enjoyed during those early days of their marriage, when all they could do was lay in bed together and feel how incredibly wonderful it was to fuck, to be so much in love, and to want to just die doing nothing but that.
He didn’t wait for her to return his gaze, deciding he’d indulged his fantasy too long. He inhaled, sitting erect in the chair and stared out the window.
He fingered the wedding ring still fuckin’ stuck on his digit. He’d go get it removed tonight. Probably was a jewelry store open somewhere. He’d go there alone. They probably knew what to do and saw it all the time in this place of broken dreams and fantasies of impossible proportions.
“So can you tell me how you managed to get that ring on your finger if you aren’t really married?” Her face was pure angel. The right side of her lips turned up in a sexy crease he watched deepen and then disappear. His heart was in his throat. He hated experiencing being so helpless.
“Well, you, of all people understand me, Ginger. Always unpredictable. Surprises. I was expecting to see the little lady come tonightand claim her prize!” he extended his arms to the sides and gave a sarcastic chuckle. It would have been funnier if he’d been drunk. “But like all the rest of the women I’ve loved and love still�
��” He watched her blink twice. “She’s abandoned me. Left me here in Sin City.”
He could tell she was at a loss how to react to him. He leaned in and suddenly decided to take a chance, tucking her hands in his. “Funny thing is, Ginger, you were the one I always wanted, even after I went out and got crazy. It was just a rebound thing. Twice. That’s the God’s truth, and I’m sorry.”
He watched her eyes fill up with tears. Now he’d done it, made her miserable with a come-on she probably thought was generated by some desire to get even with Monica. Or anger at being left at the altar with no wedding night to consummate.
He was about to pull his hands away and leave her alone when she moved one thumb over the top of one of his hands and didn’t say a word. He knew that look. It was pure flame.
She examined their entwined fingers. “I always thought we never finished what we started. Things got in the way. If they weren’t there, we would have been different.”
“I didn’t like disappointing you all the time.”
“You scared me, Jake.”
“I scared myself.” He had to break away. He put his hands on his thighs under the table, checking out the bizarre assortment of people sitting in the coffee shop. The crowd was nearly as colorful as the cast of the Circus Bare.
She was doing that thing again she always did when things got tough. She inhaled and was holding her breath, steeling herself from exploding out of control. He hated he had that effect on her.
He loved her, but it was so bad for her that he did. The best thing in the world to do was to let her go. He wished she’d find someone else, because he hated the idea of hurting someone he loved so much.
“Ginger, I loved you so much it hurt. I want to be a better man. A man who wouldn’t disappoint you all the time. You are way too good for me, honey. Way too good. I’m not worth it.”
“Stop it, Jake. That’s not true. You just don’t want to try.”
“Try?” He sipped his latte and noticed she’d barely touched hers. “Come on, finish your coffee, and I’ll walk you back across the street.”
Band of Bachelors: Jake Book 3 Page 3