Fabric of Fate

by N. J. Waters

  Audrey didn’t think he was going to release her at first, but gradually he lowered her to the ground. She walked on unsteady feet to the small patch of ground and stared down at it.

  She remembered bits and pieces of that night—the cold and driving rain, the blustering winds that had bitten into her flesh. She’d probably never remember all of it and that was fine with her. She could have easily died here and likely would have if they hadn’t found her.

  “Thank you for saving my life.”

  “Save your thanks for Carn. He’s the one that found you.” Abrah turned, strode back to his horse and swung up onto its back. “Come. It is time to go home.”

  Audrey closed her eyes as pain engulfed her body and soul. Home. Had she ever had one? Maybe when she was a young child and her parents had still been together. But she’d been too young when her father had left to have more than one or two memories of that time.

  She blinked back tears and headed toward Heroc. If she believed what they’d told her then it was almost time for the tapestry to appear, time for her to go home. Soon this place and these men would be nothing more than a memory, like the sandcastle, like this day.

  She stumbled and would have fallen but for the strong arms that rescued her, keeping her from taking a header into the rocks and hard ground. She didn’t have to see behind her to know it was Abrah who caught her. Anger radiated from the man, searing everyone and everything around him. She could have handled it if he’d yelled, stomped around and berated her. It was his quiet acceptance that made her ache. She didn’t want him to hurt, didn’t want him to be angry, but didn’t know how to change the inevitable.

  Her chest hurt but she knew it wasn’t due to any illness—mental or physical—but was because her heart was breaking for Abrah and Heroc and for herself. The ride back to the castle was short. Abrah kept her close but said nothing. She wished he’d say something. Anything.

  “I have to go back.” She had to make him understand.

  “Why?” His deep growl vibrated through her body, giving her goose bumps.

  “Why?” she repeated.

  “Why do you have to go home? What is there waiting for you?” He swung down off the back of his mount and stared up at her.

  “My life.” She’d believed that only days before but the words no longer rang as true.

  “Then you will do what you must do.” Abrah lifted her off the horse and set her on the hard-packed ground of the stable floor before leading the animal way. She watched him go, totally confused and bewildered.

  “Come inside.” Heroc wrapped his arm around her shoulders and turned her toward the door. “You’ll want to get cleaned up before we eat the evening meal.”

  She went with him, but looked back. In the shadows, Abrah was standing by his horse, watching them.

  Abrah lifted his mug of ale and drank deep, watching his men-at-arms and the others who had joined them for this final evening meal with Audrey—his people, his responsibility, the only life he knew. One he’d hoped to share with Audrey.

  He took another drink, tasting the bitter ale on his tongue before swallowing. He wanted to get drunk even though he’d never been in such a state in his life. Maybe strong spirits could drown his sorrow and make him forget the woman sitting next to him.

  Today had been a waste of time. Better they’d locked her in a tower room when she’d arrived and left her there until the tapestry arrived to take her home.

  She laughed at something Heroc said and he wanted to fling his mug against the wall and watch it shatter into a million pieces.

  No one watching him would guess at the scope of his inner turmoil. He sat at the head of the table with his legs stretched out before him, the picture of relaxed masculinity.

  He’d even dressed for her last night here, wearing an embroidered shirt that his mother had made him. A heavy silver torque rested over his heart—a symbol of his authority as lord here. It had belonged to his father and his father before him, and so on, going back into the mists of time.

  “Why do you wear two skinny braids in your hair while Heroc doesn’t?”

  He turned his head slowly and studied Audrey. She was smiling, but there was a ring of falseness in her good spirits. Her eyes were sad and her cheeks flushed. “I am the eldest.”

  “Oh.” She nibbled on her bottom lip. “So it denotes your status and isn’t a fashion statement.”

  He wasn’t certain what she meant, so he said nothing. Her hand trembled when she picked up her cup and his gut clenched. He disliked seeing her upset. It didn’t matter that he was angry with her for choosing to leave.

  Abrah debated with himself for a short while and then shoved back his chair, coming to his feet. “We will retire.” There was no point in putting off the inevitable and he wanted to be alone with her when the tapestry appeared, not in front of an avid audience.

  He took Audrey’s hand and pulled her to stand beside him. There were no cheers from the others in the room. They all knew she planned to return home.

  She hesitated and then raised her chin, facing the group that had joined them for the evening meal. “Thank you all for everything.”

  No one replied, but several of the men inclined their heads in respect. Tara was swiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. Audrey’s chin wobbled before firming again. There was no doubting she had a backbone of steel.

  Abrah nodded at Heroc, who fell in beside them, and they made their way up the stairs to his room with Carn at their heels. He led Audrey to the chair beside the fireplace and indicated she should sit there. Heroc closed and locked the door.

  “Why are you leaving? What is your objection to staying here?” He should have asked this question the first time she’d told him she was going home.

  “It doesn’t matter now.”

  “It does!” Audrey jumped when he roared. Even he was shocked by his outburst. “It does,” he said more quietly. Their very future was on the line.

  She shrugged. “I don’t know what to do here. I mean, I can’t cook and you don’t need me to manage your household. Not that I’d know what to do there. Everything is so different than in my world.”

  “Is that all?” Abrah wanted to grip her shoulders and shake her but clenched his hands into fists by his sides instead, knowing he’d never do anything that might harm her.

  She surged from the seat, anger bringing color to her cheeks and a flash of fire to her blue eyes. “No, that is not all. I don’t want to be dependent on a man for anything. To have to go to him for money, to wonder if he’s going to up and leave me someday.”

  She slapped her hand over her mouth as though she’d said too much.

  “Who left you?” Abrah softly asked. Whoever it was, Abrah wanted to find him and beat him to within an inch of his life. He had helped shape Audrey and her beliefs toward men and life in general. So much in her past had made her afraid to trust and time was too short to change her mind.

  Audrey wanted to scream or cry. Maybe even both. She couldn’t believe she’d just blurted that out, had never quite articulated in that way before. That was her mother’s life, not hers. She’d worked hard to make certain her fate was different. It had been a long, hard road for her mother when Audrey’s father left. She’d never had a job and didn’t have much schooling. She’d depended on her husband for everything and when he’d left her she’d been lost.

  “Who?” Abrah prompted again.

  “My father.” A tear rolled down her cheek and she swiped it away before Abrah could. His hand dropped back by his side. “He took off one day, leaving my mother with nothing. She didn’t know what to do without him.”

  “I am sorry for that, Audrey. But not all men are like that.”

  “I know. But how do you know for sure? How can you tell?” What she was really asking was how could she trust them and from the pained expression on his face, Abrah understood that all too well.

  “You have to trust your heart.” This was the first Heroc had spoken and his wor
ds shook her to her core because she didn’t know how to trust her heart.

  Abrah cursed and strode to the chest at the foot of the bed. He threw back the lid and lifted out a small, wooden cask. He carried it back to her and held it toward her. “If you stay this is yours. You can trade what is inside it for food and goods. You will never be dependent on us, but know that we will always provide for you.”

  She didn’t want to take whatever was in the wooden cask, didn’t want him to think he had to buy her love. Her mouth went dry and her head spun. Oh, dear God, she loved him. And she loved Heroc too. What had she done?

  Abrah grew impatient and flipped back the lid to reveal a small pile of silver and jewels. She had no idea what it was worth in this world, but in hers it would be a small fortune.

  “People value silver because it is rare and the jewels for their beauty.” Abrah removed the silver torque from around his neck and place it in the chest along with the rest.

  She tucked her hands under her arms and shook her head. “No. I won’t take it. I can’t.” She backed away, her limbs weak and trembling. Everything had been so clear only days before. She knew who she was and where her life was going. Now every cell in her body ached with indecision.

  Who was she and what did she want?

  Abrah slammed the small cask shut, tossed it back into the chest and slammed the lid. “Nothing will make you stay?”

  She shook her head again, not because she was disagreeing with him but because she was so confused.

  “So be it.” He came toward her and for the first time since she arrived she was truly afraid. She threw up her hands to ward him off and backed away until her spine hit the wall.

  He was so much bigger than she, his sheer sense of will almost overpowering. It would take a strong woman to stand up to these men, not to lose herself to the overwhelming strength of their personalities.

  What was wrong with her? She wasn’t a coward. Never had been. She pushed away from the wall and took a step forward, drilling her finger against his chest. “Stop trying to bully me. Just because you’re bigger than me doesn’t mean you can intimidate me.”

  He growled and grabbed her hand, tugging her toward him. She was off balance and fell forward. Abrah took advantage of the situation, scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bed. “What are you doing?” she asked even though there was no real question in her mind.

  “Taking you to bed. If you are bent on leaving I want one more time with you.” He stood her beside the bed and had her tunic over her head before she could blink. His eyes darkened and his pupils dilated as his gaze wandered over her breasts, stopping on her taut nipples.

  He groaned and bent forward, capturing a tight nub between his lips. His tongue teased the hard bud and she gripped his head, holding him to her.

  How would she live without him?

  Strong hands eased her pants down her thighs and over her feet. Heroc was busy stripping the rest of her clothing from her. She tugged at Abrah’s shirt, wanting it off him, needing to see him naked. Wanting both their hands and mouths on her. The mood was frantic. There was no time left to play or explore.

  Abrah backed her up until her knees hit the side of the bed. She sat down hard on the mattress, her face level with his groin. The front of his pants was tented, his engorged cock pressing hard against it. She licked her lips in anticipation as he stepped back and kicked off his boots.

  Heroc hadn’t wasted any time and was already naked. He pushed her back onto the mattress and stretched out beside her. He caught her chin in his hand, leaned down and kissed her. It was sweet and bold, just like the man himself. There was so much to talk about, so much she wanted to say to them but the clock was ticking.

  Three days wasn’t nearly enough time to make such a monumental decision. Audrey didn’t know what to do, not anymore and the indecision was tearing her apart. An errant tear rolled down her cheek. Heroc broke the kiss and captured the tear with his tongue. “Don’t cry, sweetness,” he murmured.

  Abrah’s head jerked up and their gazes met. There was such pain in his eyes and she knew they mirrored hers. They were all hurting.

  He finished stripping off his clothes and climbed into bed beside her. Naked, he was even more imposing than he was fully clothed. He’d already removed the ornate, silver torque from around his neck, and now he took off the heavy wrist and armbands leaving only gleaming flesh over thick bones and taut muscle.

  His cock was hard and full, jutting out in front of him. Audrey knew she’d compare every man she ever met for the rest of her life to the two men in this room. They were the standard by which all others would be judged.

  Abrah sat on the bed and leaned against the headboard. He lifted her with ease, settling her on his lap with his erection between them. It pressed against her stomach and the dampness from the head brushed against her skin.

  Reaching down, she closed her fingers around his cock. It pulsed hard and hot against her palm, filled with life and promise.

  Heroc moved in behind her, his chest pressed against her back, his mouth hot against her nape. He nipped at the flesh, his teeth nibbling the sensitive skin, drawing a moan of pleasure from her. His tongue teased the length of her neck just below her ear and she gasped.

  Abrah growled and captured her mouth, kissing the very breath from her body. Desperation filled her and she clung to his shoulders, digging her nails into him. She was surrounded by the two brothers, their strength and their overwhelming presence. But she didn’t feel threatened. She felt safe and secure. Protected. Cherished.

  Tears pricked her eyes and she inwardly cursed herself for being so emotional. Three days. She’d only known them for three days but they’d changed her in ways she hadn’t thought possible.

  And she had changed them too. In her heart, she knew their lives would never be the same. The echo of loss would follow them all to their dying days.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Abrah tasted desperation on her lips, felt it in the way her fingers dug into his shoulders. He didn’t understand Audrey. Obviously, she felt something for him and Heroc, so why wouldn’t she stay?

  Because this world was foreign to her. Because she would be alone and at the mercy of men here.

  He was still reeling over the confession of her past. How could a man leave his wife and child? Abrah couldn’t even imagine such a thing. It was unknown to his culture. If a man died, his brothers and family would care for his woman and child. She would not want for anything.

  Her past had tainted her thinking and Abrah knew he was asking the impossible of her. Yet he’d had to ask. He’d offered her his entire wealth, such as it was, but she’d rejected the silver and jewels the same way she’d rejected his home and his heart.

  That wasn’t quite true. He’d offered her the wealth but not his heart. That, he’d kept locked up tight in his chest. He could not afford to have it offered and rejected. It would kill him.

  He cupped her breasts and thumbed her nipples and she rewarded him with a moan of pleasure. Here in bed, Audrey never held back. She gave of herself freely, offering untold treasures. But it was borrowed treasure.

  He couldn’t wait any longer, knowing that the tapestry could appear at any time and steal her away from him. Abrah released her lips and lifted her. “You will remember me,” he promised her. Her nails dug into his flesh as he lifted her and positioned his cock against her opening.

  “I will,” she promised, but it was cold comfort.

  Abrah met his brother’s gaze and saw the sorrow there. Heroc no longer believed. It was a deep blow to see the hope bleed from his brother’s eyes.

  He pulled Audrey downward and gritted his teeth as his cock forged inward. She was tight, but wet and warm. Welcoming.

  It was a lie. She might welcome his body but nothing else. She would not risk more and stay.

  Abrah tilted back his head and roared his pain to the heavens.

  Heroc did not want to think about the coming night. He wanted thi
s moment to last forever. He pressed his cock against Audrey’s warm, supple spine, clasped her hips in his hands. She’d brought life to his home and to his heart.

  And she was leaving.

  There was nothing left to be done. Abrah had shocked him by offering Audrey their small treasury. That was held in keeping, to be used for only the direst of emergencies. They produced all they needed to survive, but the silver and jewels would see them through any dark times. To offer it to Audrey was as deep a declaration of love as Heroc could imagine his brother giving.

  He wondered if Audrey even realized that.

  To Abrah the well-being of the people came first. Always. To offer the wealth of their entire holdings to her was unprecedented. It also told him how deeply Abrah cared for her.

  His brother’s cry of pain echoed off the walls. Desperation seized Heroc and he wrapped his arm around Audrey’s waist, trying to anchor her to him, to his home and to his life.

  He buried his face in the curve of her neck and inhaled her sweet scent. She smelled of the soap she’d used in her bath and he knew he’d never be able to use that blend again. It would forever remind him of Audrey.

  Audrey’s heart beat faster than a runaway train and her lungs were struggling to get enough air. Abrah’s cry was filled more with pain than pleasure. She was hurting him and Heroc. She hadn’t meant to. She bit her bottom lip to keep from echoing his cry.

  His cock filled her, stretching her pussy, but there was more pain than pleasure. Not physical pain, but the ache of loss, of separation even though they were joined in the most intimate way.

  She ran her hands over his wide shoulders, down his muscular biceps and across his thick chest. She wanted to touch him everywhere, to memorize every inch of his body.

  There was so much about Abrah she didn’t know. There hadn’t been much time to talk and he hadn’t exactly been offering. Heroc was the more open of the two and even he was quiet now.

  Their harsh breathing and the occasional moan were the only sounds in the room. There were no words of love, no offer of comfort, only the physical act of coming together.