Theo's hands landed on my shoulders, his thumbs rubbing in circles above my collarbones. I opened my eyes and looked up into his face as he kept slowly massaging the stiffness away.
"Congratulations," he murmured. "You're officially an Athanatos. Mistrust being our number one tenet."
My eyelids closed again in sadness at that thought. It was not a way to live.
Theo pulled me closer and then wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pressing my cheek into his chest. He kissed the top of my head, inhaling my scent.
"I wonder," he mused, "if you'll obey the rules of history or just forge on despite precedent."
"I do have a bit of wild streak," I deadpanned.
"Oraia," he purred, ignoring the tongue-in-cheek tone of my words. "You are Fire itself."
God. How could I not love this version of Theo?
How could I have been so lucky to have him fall for me twice?
Chapter 15
Let... Me... In
Isadora hadn't awoken by dinner. Even I was beginning to worry. If she didn't come-to soon, I was going to have to break my promise to Theo. The Moreton Bay Fig Tree had somehow miraculously survived the earthquake, and I knew I'd start my attempts there.
Gi had been the first Element to Awaken, it would be the first I reconnected with.
Dinner was a subdued affair. Without being able to connect to the outside Athanatos world, and with the repetitive and rather inadequate announcements on the Civil Defence radio station, we felt extremely cut off and ineffectual. There was only so much tidying of rubble about the place, stacking of provisions and organising a ration system, that you could do.
By the time the sun set and no further Genesis threat had appeared we all decided we'd hit the sack and get as much sleep as we could, knowing tomorrow could bring another disaster. Theo offered to take first watch, with Aktor moving into Isadora's room to keep an eye on her, and Mark being locked out of either duty altogether.
I was up for third watch, after Nico took over from Theo, so I crawled onto the big mattress, covered myself with the blankets Aktor and Sonya had salvaged, and waited for sleep to arrive.
There was no reason to think my grandfather would appear in a dream visit, I hadn't had another Awakening, but as I finally drifted off to sleep I kept hoping that he would. If he was in CERN, he had access to whatever Element he could steal, and might have an answer for us on how we could reconnect with ours.
I wasn't sure whose side he actually was on. One of the first things told to me when I became a Gi was that the Alchemists were the enemy. Of course, that was laughable when the Pyrkagia and Gi had proven equally as deadly to me. The Aeras not so bad, but quite frightening. I hadn't met a Nero yet, and I wasn't in any hurry.
So, who to trust? I'd chosen to put my faith in Theo. As my Thisavros he was compelled to protect me. Above all else, even his beloved Pyrkagia. Now, he was no longer my Thisavros, and yet I still found myself sure of his loyalty. But my brother, who as family should have gotten an automatic vote? I couldn't decide. And that left me in turmoil.
I knew another Genesis moment was approaching and I felt off centre, powerless, afraid. Not sure if I could trust any advice given by either Mark or Gramps. Not sure we had enough knowledge ourselves to get out of this mess without their aid.
It made for a fitful sleep, and definitely no dream visit. By the time Theo slipped into the bed beside me, in a move that felt more natural than it should have, I hadn't made progress on any front. Still lost. Still unsure. Still scared.
He pulled me close, kissed my forehead, and murmured in a tired voice, "Go back to sleep."
Thankfully with him there the next few hours seemed to be far more restful. When Nico came to wake me for my shift I almost felt whole enough to face Genesis blind, hog-tied and at a definite disadvantage. Almost.
I slipped out from under Theo's arms and legs, catching the smirk on his cousin's lips in the dim light of the candle he held out to me once I was free. We closed the door before he spoke.
"There are fires burning all over the city," he whispered as we walked into the living area. "Some are certainly out of control and no doubt intentionally set. A few have ventured closer in the past hour."
"You think we might have to handle an approaching horde?" I asked.
He snorted. "I'm picturing pitchforks and flaming torches."
Well, I had been.
"I think they'll stay back," he finally said. "Aktor and I placed some traps around the property, but if they get too close, it would be best to wake us all up."
"OK," I agreed.
"How are you holding up?" he asked, eyes scanning my no doubt pale face.
"I've had better adventures."
"Yes," he said softly. "I dare say you've had a few to date."
Silence. He seemed reluctant to go to bed. If Sonya was sharing it, I wondered why he'd delay.
"Has he remembered?" he finally asked and I realised why he wasn't rushing into my best friend's arms. It's hard to get amorous when everything was so upside down and 'round the wrong way.
"No," I murmured.
"But he seems so..."
"Attentive?"
"That's one way to put it. I would have said possessive. Acting like a Thisavros with his mate."
I shook my head. This topic of conversation still hurt so damn much, even with the progress we'd - I'd - made.
"I don't know, Nico. I'm just glad I've got Theo with me at all."
"He's bloody lucky," Nico whispered. "Even if he can't remember why."
"So am I," I ventured. Even if my heart still ached because he didn't remember me at all.
Nico offered a kiss on the cheek and then quietly left the room, leaving me with the candle. I checked the accessways, walked the perimeter of the property, took in the sporadic fires lighting up an unusually dark cityscape from the highest spot I could climb, noting their distances from us for now, and then walked back towards our makeshift home.
Without conscious thought I found myself beside the Moreton Bay Fig Tree, my hand touching the grooved trunk, my eyes following the raised roots. I sat down on one, leaning back against the base of the tree, keeping my eyes on the front of the property where anyone approaching would likely come.
It would have been so easy to reach for Gi and test our connection. The desire to call for it inside my head was so acute. But what if something happened to me, like it did to Dora? I told myself I'd be careful. I told myself I wasn't holding back a blaze for a suspended stretch of time like her. I told myself just one little, tiny attempt couldn't hurt me.
It was wrong. It could be called selfish, because those inside the house were relying on me to stay alert enough to watch over them. But the compulsion was too great, the desperate need to end this, right this, fix this, too consuming to stop me from testing the waters with the tip of my toe.
I sucked in a deep breath of air and whispered aloud, as well as in my head, "Are you there?"
Only echoing silence, which was almost a relief, belying my frantic desire to reconnect.
I dug my fingers into the dirt beside me, between the over large exposed root system of the tree. For a moment I just enjoyed the sensation, the feeling of earth over my fingertips. The smell of the soil as I disturbed it. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, rubbing dirt between my fingers and finding a strange kind of peace.
I'd promise Theo I wouldn't reach for my Stoicheio until Isadora awoke.
I'd promised my Stoicheio they were not alone.
"I'm here," I whispered, not sure if I was projecting my thoughts to Earth or not, just needing it to know I hadn't given up. Just needing to hear me say the words.
The light of dawn found me in the exact same position. I hadn't dozed off, but I certainly hadn't been as alert to my surroundings as I should have. Thankfully the front of the property looked the same, no torch or pitchfork wielding thugs crashing through the now manual front gates.
I rose up to full height and stretched
out the kinks in my body, feeling like I had slept a solid night's sleep, despite only being in what I assumed was a meditative state. I did a round of the property, checked the location of the fires that dotted the horizon; none had come close enough to cause worry. As I walked back towards the house I was conscious I'd dodged a bullet. My first watch duty and I had not been at my best.
But nothing could stop the feeling of wellbeing thrumming through me. The lack of exhaustion lifting a ten tonne weight off my shoulders. I practically skipped through the front door and raced down the hallway towards the smell of morning coffee. Aktor already up and about, lighting fires, boiling water and if I knew him, baking bread.
"Morning," I announced, as I walked into the living room. Aktor jumped and spun around from the fire with a surprised smile on his face which slowly turned to an intrigued one.
"Good morning, Miss Eden," he said. "You look like you've had a good rest."
"I have," I declared, grabbing a precious apple from the fruit bowl and taking a bite. "Even though I was on last watch."
Aktor stared at me a minute, then flicked a look towards the open door.
"Cassandra," he started and I stopped chewing because this couldn't be good. "Did you...?"
"Morning," my brother said on a yawn. "Another day in paradise, huh?" he asked, throwing himself into a chair and continuing to yawn.
"Did I what, Aktor?" I asked.
"Nothing, my dear," he said quickly returning to his task.
I watched him for a second and then mentally shrugged my shoulders and crossed the room to sit beside Mark.
"Hey," I said, some of my exuberance diminished at Aktor's strange behaviour.
Mark started chuckling.
"What?" I asked, playing with my apple, but no longer eating it.
"You got some last night, didn't you?" he whispered, leaning forward and offering me a high five.
I stared at his hand and frowned.
"What are you going on about?"
"Sis, you look like a woman well tended."
"Well... what?" I said slowly, beginning to put two and two together.
"So, was he as good as before?" my very obnoxious brother asked. "Or was it your first time all over again?"
"You have got to stop speaking right now," I declared, mortified he'd be discussing this with me.
"In times of war you have to take any chance you can grab for gratification," he declared.
"Stop," I pleaded, trying to cover my ears.
"We could be all dead tomorrow. Live it up, Case," he blithely went on. "If I were you I'd go back for seconds."
"Seconds of what?" Theo's voice asked from the door to the room. I watched as he walked over, bent down as though to kiss me, but instead took a bite of my apple. Which was kind of sitting there doing nothing in mid air by my ear.
Theo fell into the seat beside me, nodding to Aktor and wrapping a casual arm around my shoulders.
"Oh, man," Mark said. His eyes flicking from my face to Theo's. "I guess he really is a prince, huh?"
Oh, good grief. Kill me now.
"Pardon?" Theo asked.
"Well, Casey looks..."
"Stop," I snapped.
"...like she's still floating and you look..."
"Oh, dear freaking God, just stop."
"...like you need to go back to bed and sleep it off. You the man!" my brother concluded, offering another high five.
Silence. You could have heard crickets chirp, if they'd survived the earthquake.
Theo turned bemused eyes towards me, pulling away slightly to get a good look. The bemusement was swiftly replaced with anger and confusion as his gaze scanned my face.
"Tell me you didn't break your promise," he said in an extremely low and ominous voice.
"I didn't break my promise," I replied immediately. A little too quickly for someone meant to be hiding nothing. My efforts earned me a scowl.
"Then why do you look well fed?"
"I.." My mouth fell open as I realised I did feel well fed. I felt like I'd communed with my Stoicheio even though I hadn't communicated with it at all.
"What did you do?" Theo demanded, each word spoken softly and slowly.
All eyes were on me. Even Aktor had stopped breakfast preparations and was watching from his side of the room. Thankfully Nico was with Isadora, and Sonya hadn't risen yet.
"I didn't talk with it," I said, forcing myself to hold Theo's clearly enraged look. "I.." Oh, God. I might as well just come out with it. "I did speak to it. I told it, well it doesn't matter, but I spoke without reaching for it. That's all."
I wanted to say, "I swear," but felt that might have been pushing it right now. I didn't need to profess my innocence that much, even if I felt guilty for considering attempting to reconnect at all.
"That's all?" Theo asked, his body still held immobile, his eyes unfortunately still doubtful. "You look too well fed for that to be all," he added, challenging me.
I never did take well to direct challenges.
"Well," I said, crossing my arms over my chest and offering a glare. "I sat next to the Moreton Bay Fig Tree and played in the dirt, so if that's a crime against your sensibilities, then I'm sorry."
"No, you're not," Mark offered helpfully.
"Yes, I am," I argued. "I'm sorry he's got a stick up his arse and doesn't like me digging in dirt."
A snort sounded out from Aktor, who quickly covered it with the clattering of several plates. Theo silently reached forward and lifted up my hand still holding the apple. His eyes narrowed in on the dirt beneath my nails. Oh, damn it. I should have washed before I walked in here.
"I see you did," he said quietly. His attention slowly came back up to my face. "You look beautiful," he whispered, the anger at me risking myself somehow replaced with male appreciation.
"It felt right," I whispered back. "And I didn't even get a twinge in my head, if I was indeed feeding off Gi. I certainly wasn't aware I was. I just woke up feeling like I'd had the best sleep ever."
"You slept?!" he asked, voice raised.
Oh, freaking hell.
"No." I shook my head. "Nah-uh. I... meditated." I nodded my head. "Yeah, that's it."
"Yeah, that's it?" he repeated in a question. "So," he went on carefully, "you were on watch, but decided to commune with your Stoicheio and zone out for the duration of your shift."
Yeah, basically. "Not at all. I had no idea it was happening."
Oh, boy. Not the right thing to say.
"You had no idea," Theo semi-repeated slowly. "Does that mean you had no idea of what was happening around you?"
"I'd done a round of the property. I checked it again afterwards."
"And how long did this lapse of cognitive abilities last?"
Oh, now I was getting mad at his superior attitude. Even if he had a point.
I slammed the apple down on a low table in front of me and turned fully to glare at the man.
"Everything's fine," I ground out. "I'm fine. You're fine. Every freaking person is fine." I almost said, "I didn't mean to," then remembered how my mother used to lose the plot on that one.
"Everything is not fine!" Theo ground back. "You could have been harmed."
"I wasn't."
"We could have been attacked."
"We weren't."
"You could have accidentally reached for your Stoicheio and be unconscious on a bed."
"I'm not."
"Casey!"
"Theo," a small voice said from the door. We all stood up and spun to face a still pale looking Isadora, who was at least on her feet, but leaning heavily on Nico and Sonya.
For Dora to display that much weakness was truly unheard of. She must have forced herself out of bed when she heard us arguing, just to rub it in.
I held my breath.
"You're missing the point, Theodoros," she added.
"Isadora," Theo said, taking a step out from behind the couch in order to approach her. I felt abandoned, so soon after our argum
ent; his immediate desire to go to her side hurt. Even if the poor woman looked like she could use a helping hand. I wasn't feeling charitable what with my guilt and Theo's temper and, well, every-freaking-thing.
Isadora held up a hand to stop him.
"You're missing the point," she repeated.
"And the point is?" he asked in that regal tone he sometimes uses when someone pisses him off. I was unsure if it was still me, or if Dora was now the target.
"The point is, that Casey was able to commune at all."
Theo turned slowly to look back at me. I had no idea what he saw from the implacable mask on his face.
"She is well fed, no?" Isadora went on. "We all need to commune."
My eyes darted to hers, she held my gaze with an equally impassive - and completely hazel - one as Theo's. She wasn't siding with me. She was acting as the soldier she had been trained to be. Our survival relied on communion with our Stoicheio. We'd grow weak without it. Isadora was making sure that didn't happen. For everyone.
"If it works, it could make us stronger," Theo conceded. "So be it." Agreeing because we wouldn't be reaching, just communing.
"The Prince has spoken," Mark muttered to the side, but no one listened.
As Aktor rushed over to prepare a puffed up seat for Isadora to sit on, Theo held out a hand for me to take. I stared at it for a second, as everyone else's attention was on the recovered - well, at least conscious and officious - Isadora, unsure if grasping it was a good idea.
"Humour me," he murmured, clearly not fully recovered from his latest over-protection jag.
I slipped my hand reluctantly into his larger one and let him lead me from the room. He stopped just down the hall, by the modified front entrance we now used.
Turning to me he said, "Don't do that to me again."
What? "I didn't do anything to you," I pointed out.
"You scared me half to death."
"Theo," I said frustratingly. "You've got to stop this... this possessive lark you're on."
The Chilling Change Of Air (Elemental Awakening, Book 3) Page 15