by Jessica Kale
Her expression was tamer than before; normally, she looked like a tigress ready to pounce. But after hearing the tape, her face fell lifeless, which, to Gabriella, was a good sign. Straub whispered something to Dorothy before he spun around in his chair and stared at the blonde. “So, I understand that you want to become a solo artist?” he asked, searching her face for a reaction.
Gabriella nodded. “I feel like there’s a lot of controversy surrounding the band these days, and I don’t want to be a part of it,” she said, shaking her head from side to side. “And after what happened on tour …” She paused for a second, clearing her throat. “I don’t think I want people to look at me as the girl who got kicked out of Sawdust, you know?”
Straub nodded, trying to mask his smile. He scratched his head and fumbled with a few things on his desk, pretending to be deep in thought. “Well, I’m not gonna lie, Gabriella. You were our biggest asset,” he said. “Sawdust will never really be the same without you.”
“Which is why I think I should stick around, maybe work on a single or two,” she said, the corners of her mouth fighting to turn into an angry scowl. It was hard to maintain her smile.
“What do you think, Dorothy?” Straub asked, peering over his shoulder at the raven-haired woman. “Don’t you think Gabriella would be amazing to have on board as a solo artist?”
“That depends,” the woman said. “Are you more open now to switching things up than you were before?” she asked.
“If by that you mean transitioning to a more universal style of music, then yes, definitely,” Gabriella said.
“You know you’re quite the role model, Gabriella,” Dorothy said, scribbling some things on her notepad. “You just came out recently, you’re already a respected singer among people your age and, well, you’re hot as fuck.”
“Thanks,” she said, trying not to grimace. “I appreciate that.”
“I think we have a deal,” Straub said, his eyes darting from Dorothy to Gabriella, and then to Dorothy again. “Gabriella, you made the right choice by coming to us. We’re going to catapult you to new levels of fame. Believe me, you won’t regret it.”
Gabriella pursed her lips and reached her hand out to him. Her head was buzzing with thoughts, with expectations. Across the table from her sat Straub and Dorothy, gawking at her like a pair of hungry wolves. Suddenly Gabriella felt like running out of the office. She slid forward in her seat and, eventually, rose to her feet. This whole place was starting to feel like a prison.
“Well, I better get going,” she said.
“See you on Sunday to start working out the details of your contract?” Straub asked, the silver of his eyes flaring up. If Gabriella looked closer, she could’ve have seen dollar signs where his irises were.
“Definitely. One o’clock?” she asked.
Straub nodded and she walked away. Her heels still clicked against the floor, but Gabriella didn’t walk as proudly as she had thirty minutes ago. Something told her she was probably making a big mistake, but for the time being, she had to live with it.
CHAPTER 15
“Check this out,” Jeremy said, motioning for Alicia to join him. He sat cross-legged on the floor, staring at the TV screen. Beside him were three empty beer bottles; Alicia was growing worried about him, but right now, she had bigger things to take care of.
“What’s going on?” she asked, snuggling up next to him. Jeremy didn’t move. “You’ll see,” he smirked.
“Oh, I know what this is,” Alicia said, averting her gaze to the TV screen. Gabriella was shifting in a big red velvet armchair opposite a blue-haired interviewer with a smile whiter than pearls. She sat cross-legged and obviously uncomfortable. Alicia watched her as she flashed the interviewer a shy smile, as if weary of what he had to say next.
“So, Gabriella, news has been going around that StoneCrawl has officially dropped Sawdust? Is that true?”
“It is, yes,” the ash-blonde said, nodding. She was so uncomfortable, it almost looked like her cheeks hurt from smiling. Alicia couldn’t stand to watch this, but she knew she had to.
“But I think most fans would agree that the band is nothing without you,” the interviewer said, leaning forward in his chair, his eyes wide in attention.
“Well, I wouldn’t say the band is nothing without me,” Gabriella said, averting her gaze elsewhere. She pouted her pale pink lips that resembled rose buds, trying to carefully choose her words. “I left the band due to unfortunate circumstances … right now I’d just like to do what’s best for me,” she continued, holding her breath.
“So what you’re saying is that you’re flying solo now?” the man asked, briefly glancing at the camera and then back at Gabriella.
“Yes,” she said, her cheeks turning a bright crimson. She jerked her leg up and down; Alicia could tell she was all kinds of nervous. “And I’ll let you in on another surprise,” she said again, this time more challengingly. “StoneCrawl is not only signing with me, but they’ll be signing with two other artists.”
The blue-haired merman flashed his viewers an intense grin. Alicia felt like she was personally violated. “Do tell,” he said, leaning back in his chair.
“James Logan and Sandy Day,” Gabriella said, rather challengingly. “They’ll both be joining the StoneCrawl family, as solo artists,” she continued.
“You’re kidding!”
“No, it’s true,” Gabriella said. “David Straub, owner of StoneCrawl saw something in them. It doesn’t really strike me as a surprise that he intends to sing with them both,” she continued.
“But let me just add something here; didn’t Logan turn down his contract with StoneCrawl just days ago?” the interviewer asked, scratching his beard.
“Yes, but he bounced right back. If you want to know the details then I guess you should hear them from him,” Gabriella said, pulling down her skirt.
Alicia could tell she was at the peak of her discomfort. She was twisting her ankles around, as if begging to be released. But she still kept that smile on her face; she knew she had to get through this interview. Alicia knew it, too. Life after this interview would be nothing like before. The whole world was tuning in, but no one knew, no one but them.
“Well, before this interview, Gabriella told me she had big news to share with our viewers. If this wasn’t big news, then I don’t know what is!” the man said, turning to face the camera. He turned back to Gabriella. “So it’s official?”
“Not yet,” Gabriella said. “We’re working out the details of the contract. But soon.”
“That’s exciting news!”
“Actually,” Gabriella said, as if preparing to drop one last bomb, “I wanted to say that Logan, Sandy and I will be opening for the annual StoneCrawl festival this year, so hurry up and get your ticket! Also, I’d just like to thank my fans out there for their enormous support.” There was a pause. Gabriella stared into the camera, as if bracing Alicia for what she was about to say. “And I’d also like to ask them to stand by me through this tough time.” Gabriella clasped her hands in her lap and shifted in her place. “Alicia and I are no longer together.”
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that,” the interviewer gasped.
He tried to act reserved, but there was a smile in there that was struggling to break free. “I’m sure you have your fans’ full support,” he continued, pretending to flip through his flash cards. For a moment he looked flustered, like he was at a loss for words.
Alicia couldn’t bear hearing those words come out of Gabriella’s mouth. She looked over at Jeremy, who didn’t flinch. He was rocking back and forth in front of the TV screen, as if mesmerized by Gabriella and what she had to say. Every word, every syllable was accounted for, Alicia just couldn’t stand to hear it. She got up on her knees and rose to her feet, trying not to let it get to her.
“You know, I can already see the hate mail pouring in,” she said. “Some people were dying to hear Gabriella say those words on li
ve television.”
“Homophobes?” Jeremy asked, turning to look at her.
“Precisely.”
“Well, they got what they wanted,” Jeremy said, rolling his eyes. “It’s going to be okay, Alicia. You know that, right?”
“We’ll see what happens,” she said, massaging her temples with both hands. “Right now, I just want one thing.”
“What?”
“I need a drink.”
CHAPTER 16
“God,” Alicia said, slamming the lid of her laptop down.
“Come on, stop reading this shit, you’ll drive yourself crazy,” Jeremy said, peering over Alicia’s shoulder.
She had been going through tabloid articles all day, her eyes glued to pictures of her and Gabriella walking together, holding hands when they didn’t realize they were being photographed. During their entire relationship, she never really paid attention to the tabloids. But now, these photos were surfacing, and they were making her question everything she knew about privacy.
Superstar Gabriella Tolken and producer Alicia Harper break up!
Alicia’s mind was wandering in all sorts of directions. She squinted at the big headlines; they were so bold they almost looked intimidating, like they were about to jump out at her.
Looks like Gabriella Tolken is sick of her producer girlfriend!
Alicia cringed. Normally these things didn’t get to her, probably because she never cared enough to read them. But now that she was stuck in a labyrinth of big headlines and photos and crazy rumors, she couldn’t help but stress over it.
“I can’t, Jeremy, this shit’s driving me crazy,” she said, running a hand through her hair. She took in a deep breath and let it out through her teeth.
“Alright, so, this is what’s going to happen,” Jeremy said. “I’m going to take your laptop away until you promise me you’re not going to look through tabloids all day.”
“But what if something important pops up?” Alicia asked, holding onto her laptop the way a mother would hold her child.
“Believe me, nothing important comes out of the tabloids. They won’t know stuff about you that you don’t know about yourself,” Jeremy said.
Alicia nodded and gave him the laptop. She slumped back against the wall and let out a sigh. She wondered what Gabriella was doing, she wondered what the press were saying about her. Better off without Alicia Harper? Better off as a solo artist?
“Whatever, I can’t think about this,” she said. “Listen, I gotta run. I’ll meet you back here in a couple of hours.” She got up slowly. Her legs wobbled underneath her, her knees threatening to give way.
“Where to?” Jeremy asked, gawking at her as she went around looking for her car keys.
“I’ll update you later. It’s just something I need to do.”
***
The car ride to the diner was a long one. Alicia couldn’t stop thinking about all the paparazzi, all those stories about her and Gabriella surfacing. She let out a sigh and stomped down on the gas pedal, trying to get her mind off things. She rolled the windows down, all of them, turned on the radio and lit a cigarette. She had tried to kick the habit, over and over again, but with all that was happening she was finding it hard, almost impossible, to quit the one thing that calmed her down, put her at ease.
And now let’s take a look at all the celebrity breakup rumors!
Immediately, Alicia turned off the radio. “God!” she sighed, punching the steering wheel hard enough for a loud honk to escape it. The road seemed to drag on forever. In the distance she could see roofs of churches, a sign she was approaching downtown. Finally, she parked hastily in front of Joe’s, hopping out of her car and running inside.
“Dad!”
“Hey, pumpkin!” Daniel Harper said, rising to his feet.
Alicia hadn’t seen him since their last encounter; just being in the same place with him felt so strange, so surreal. But in a good way. Sometimes she had a hard time processing that this was her father, the man who raised her and then disappeared. But she wasn’t upset about his disappearance anymore, and neither was she upset about his reappearance. Seeing him was like coming up for fresh air, feeling alive. She still had to grow accustomed to his receding hairline, his drooping eyelids and the lines on his forehead. In a way, they made him look more familiar, even more familiar than the pictures her mother had kept behind their TV set.
“Hey,” she said, throwing her arms around his neck. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you more, pumpkin,” he said. “Come here, I want to see your face.”
The two of them sat down across from each other, like two replicas of the same person, staring into each other’s eyes.
“Well,” he said, breaking the silence. “Coffee?”
Alicia nodded, gesturing to the waitress to take their order. As soon as that was out of the way, she turned her attention to her father and squinted.
“I’m ready,” she said.
“Alright,” her father nodded. “Let’s get down to business.”
The waitresses were hovering around the diner like bees, eyeing Alicia in a way that made her feel violated. One of them came up to her for an autograph, but she refused.
“You know you can’t just avoid your fans forever,” Daniel said, staring at Alicia with a flicker in his eyes.
“They’re following me around everywhere I go!” she said, slamming her hand against the table.
“See, now you’re just drawing more attention to yourself,” he said, shaking his head from side to side. “Alicia, if you can’t embrace the fact that some people out there would kill to take a picture with you, then what does that make you?”
“Ungrateful?” she asked, biting her lower lip.
“Exactly,” her dad nodded. “So just smile at them courteously and don’t be a buzzkill.”
Alicia chuckled. She ran a hand through her hair and stared out the window. Oh, how things had changed. She saw herself in each and every one of those waitresses, floating around tables, jotting down orders, mopping up floors. In a way, she missed being in their shoes. Not having to think about photographers hiding in bushes, people sending hate mail, tabloids spreading rumors. Back then, she didn’t have to worry about all of that. She worried about other things, bigger things. But remembering things like paying her tuition, working night shifts, and fighting with her mom made Alicia feel grateful that this was no longer the case. She felt grateful for what she had.
“Alright, so …” she said, staring at her dad expectantly.
“So,” he said, grinning like a child. “I pulled all the strings I could, and I think I may have just gotten the job done.”
“Seriously?” Alicia asked, her eyes wider than a set of plates. “So it’s done?”
“It’s done,” he said. “I don’t want you to worry about the details. Everything is falling into place.”
Alicia couldn’t believe what she was hearing. For once, everything was going as planned. She got up and hugged her father, drinking in his scent before she turned to leave. “I have to go,” she said, throwing her bag over her shoulder. “I’ll be in touch.”
“The coffee!” Daniel called out.
“Enjoy it!” she called back, smiling widely. “I’ll call you as soon as I can!”
Alicia put her hood on and walked out of the diner. She felt lighter than air. For once, everything was falling into place. She just needed to see it happen.
***
“Hey, Andy, is your watch working?” Straub asked, waving to one of the technicians.
“Yeah,” he said, checking the time. “It’s eight fifteen.”
“What the hell?” Straub said, placing his hands on his hips and looking around. There was no sign of Gabriella, or Logan. Or Sandy. It was like they had disappeared into thin air.
“Margaret!” Straub yelled. “Will you try calling them again? This is ridiculous! They’re supposed to go on stage in forty-five
minutes, and they’re not even here yet!”
He squeezed his eyes shut and started massaging his temples with both hands. “I don’t get it,” he said, peering through the stage curtains. Groups of people were pouring in; Straub was getting nervous. “Margaret!”
“I tried calling Gabriella on her personal number but she’s not answering!” the spiky-haired assistant said. She grabbed a magazine and started fanning herself; beads of sweat were trailing down her forehead. Straub moved almost without end; if his limbs were moving, then he could keep the anxiety at bay, or at least ignore it for a while. But no matter what he did, the feeling was still there, coursing through his veins as if it had hitched a ride on his blood cells.
“What about Logan and Sandy?” he asked, his eyes moving from side to side.
“They’re not answering, either,” the woman said. “I tried both their personal numbers and their agents’ numbers … nothing.”
“This is a fucking disaster!” Straub said, peering through the curtains again. “Maybe there’s a road block somewhere?”
“Let me check,” she said, walking away.
This was hopeless.
Suddenly Straub’s phone started ringing. He cringed when he saw Dorothy’s name flash on his screen, contemplating whether to answer or not. When the ringing persisted, he swiped to answer and sighed. “We have a problem … no one’s here yet.”
“What do you mean? Wasn’t the show sold out?” she asked, her voice turning all kinds of anxious.
“That’s not what I mean. None of the band members are here, yet,” Straub said, pacing back and forth like a caged tiger.
He could hear the people’s whispers from backstage; they were getting louder, more enthusiastic, and for what? An empty stage? Empty stools? Instruments set up with no one to play them? Straub was going absolutely insane. The trio was supposed to be there for a sound check, but they never showed up. A part of him just wanted to abandon the show altogether, to get into his car and drive back home like nothing happened. Every muscle in his body felt tight, ready for action, but he couldn’t move. Suddenly he felt pinned to the floor; his body screamed at him to sprint down the street, to spend the energy that kept piling in regardless of his inability to use it.