by L. B. Reyes
She nodded, giving me a small smile.
The silence that surrounded us on our way to the appointment was relaxing. I had many questions of my own. I was certain I’d felt the baby moving, but Evie hadn’t mentioned anything.
“Do you think they may be able to tell us if it’s a boy or girl?”
I grinned at her. “You’re anxious to know, aren’t you?”
“I really want to know.”
If it was a boy, then I’d be happy…but I could already picture a little Evelyn running around, causing chaos along with her mother. Sure, both would be a handful, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.
We arrived at the doctor’s office, and while we waited to be called back, Evie looked through magazines, her eyes lighting up every time she read something about the stage of pregnancy she was in. Unable to help myself, I tilted her chin up and placed a soft kiss on her lips, lingering there a bit longer than I should have.
“Ms. Evelyn Carson?”
The nurse called Evie’s name with a small laugh at our PDA. “Let’s go, pretty girl.”
Once in the room, Evie lay back on the exam table, quietly looking around. She didn’t seem nervous, just thoughtful. I didn’t have much of a chance to ask what was on her mind because the doctor soon knocked.
“Good morning. How are you two doing today?”
“Good,” Evie replied with a smile.
“Baby is growing, huh?” The doctor raised her eyebrows, smiling when she saw Evie’s growing bump.
“Every day.”
Already used to the routine of being at the doctor’s office, Evie pulled up her shirt, prepared for the cold gel to get the ultrasound done. Her eyes flew to the screen, eager to see our baby.
I did the same.
The sound of our baby’s heartbeat filled the room just as the image settled on the screen. Evie beamed, glancing my way to make sure I was looking.
“Beautiful heartbeat…and wonderfully active baby.” The doctor smiled when the baby moved what seemed to be his/her legs and arms. Evie laughed softly. “Have you felt movement?”
Evie sighed, giving the doctor a slow nod.
She had?
“The day before yesterday, actually.” Evelyn didn’t turn to look at me.
The day of the exhibition.
Dread started to set in along with realization. I didn’t really hear the rest of the conversation between the doctor and her while I thought back to that day. She’d been so heartbroken and sad, and while I knew my words held a large part of that responsibility, I never imagined the weight they had carried.
Once in the car, I broke the silence between us, saying the only the thing that came to mind. “You didn’t tell me the baby was moving.”
“I tried,” she whispered, her gaze sad. She cleared her throat, and though she tried to push them back, I could see the tears already in her eyes. “I went to the park that day by myself. I wasn’t planning on meeting Derek there, but he was…”
I tensed at the mention of his name but kept quiet. My mouth had fucked enough things up already.
“We talked.” She shrugged. “That’s all we did. He didn’t say anything bad about you. He was honest with me about his intentions. And then I felt the baby move.” She smiled, but it didn’t meet her eyes. “I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to wait for a cab…I don’t know. I just wanted to get to you as quickly as possible…”
Fuck.
I’m an idiot.
“It was stupid to do that, I know. But I didn’t think anything of it. I didn’t want to piss you off, and I didn’t want to cause more problems. My only worry was to share that moment with you, but you turned me away.”
“Did he feel…the baby?” I asked, tentative.
She nodded. “I didn’t want it to be him, though.”
Evelyn bit her lip to keep from quivering.
“Evie, I’m—”
“Don’t.” She shook her head, not angrily, but sad. I’d taken her hope that day and crushed it. Now it all made sense. She had spent the whole day crying. She’d spent all day longing to tell me.
Then I got home and hurt her even further. Despite that, she still tried to let me know what had happened, tried to speak up, and I didn’t give her a chance. What was supposed to be a beautiful experience for us had turned sour. I would always regret it.
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
It wasn’t true, though. I could tell by the way it affected her to talk about it. I’d hurt her deeply. Jealousy was turning me into a man I didn’t want to be, and for the first time, I had to admit that Derek had been right.
I was a dick.
He’d probably seen her excited face and was caught off guard when he saw me at a bar when my girlfriend wanted nothing but to be together that day.
“We should get going,” she said quietly. “Your parents are going to be waiting.”
Neither of us made any attempt for conversation on our way to my parents, and by the time we arrived, Evie had put on a smile as if nothing had ever happened.
Carter was already there, helping my dad grill while my mom set up a table next to the shade of trees. We’d be eating next to the lake, something I knew Evie would appreciate. I placed the chairs around the table, not missing the way my mom eyed me with caution.
“How did the appointment go?” she asked.
“It went well,” I replied, watching as Evie pulled off her shorts. It didn’t matter that she was pregnant; in fact, she looked sexier and more beautiful than ever.
“She’s oddly quiet,” my mom pointed out. “Usually, she’s here with us, making conversation with your dad and me…or she’s with you. Is everything okay?”
My dad and Carter turned their attention to me as they awaited my answer. I glanced back at Evie, who was already in the water, lying back and floating around the water with her eyes closed.
“Rough patch,” I replied, not wanting to elaborate.
Carter raised an eyebrow. Evie was like a daughter to him; knowing that she’d been sad was not something he ever wanted to hear.
“Are you two going to be okay?” he asked me, not bothering to hide his concern.
“I hope so.”
I sighed, conflicted. In my life, I didn’t think I had ever felt so regretful or confused. I felt drained.
“We can handle this,” my dad said with a smile. “Go be with her.”
Grateful, I rushed over to the lake, removing my shirt as soon as I was there. Evie opened her eyes; her gaze flew to my parents.
“Did your parents say something about my bikini?” she asked, furrowing her eyebrows. A small pout formed on her lips, one that I traced with my thumb.
I didn’t reply and took her lips in mine, claiming them in a kiss I hoped would show her how much I loved her.
Chapter 28
Evelyn
Nathan didn’t seem to care that his parents and Carter were watching. He wrapped his arms around my waist as I wrapped my legs around his while we were in the lake. I buried my face in his neck, letting myself surrender to his embrace, an embrace that I had missed so much for the past weeks. I closed my eyes, memorizing his heartbeat, the pattern of his breathing.
Memorizing him.
Memorizing the moment.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered quietly, placing a kiss on the top of my head. “I’ve been a complete ass to you.”
Please hormones, don’t take over.
I knew myself enough to be sure that if I opened my mouth, I would start crying. Everything made me emotional lately.
“Baby, answer me,” he pleaded. “Look at me.”
I didn’t want to, but he gripped my chin, forcing me to meet his gray eyes. He didn’t hide his regret.
“There’s nothing in the world more important to me than you and our baby. I’ve been going insane, thinking about whatever is going on between you and Derek, and it’s worse than being on fucking drugs.”
I tried to look away to escape the inten
sity of his gaze, but he didn’t let me.
“Evie, I love you so much, it’s damn near terrifying.” His voice was hoarse, raw with pure emotion. I blinked past the tears, but he managed to wipe one away, smiling sadly. “I should have listened to you.”
This was the Nate I knew, the Nate who was honest and sincere and aware of what he did and said. The man I had been sleeping with for the past days was a stranger…a stranger I loved regardless.
I couldn’t lie to myself; he’d hurt me. I knew he had good reason to be mad, but it didn’t make his words less painful. Yes, showing up with Derek had been the stupidest idea I’d gotten, but with my excitement, I hadn’t thought things through.
Nathan getting angry was the last thing on my mind. My dream was for him to feel the movement of the baby before anyone else. Now it was only that, a dream.
“I’m so sorry, baby. I never meant to hurt you.”
I didn’t allow my sadness to take over. “I know.”
Everyone else long forgotten, Nate leaned down, kissing me yet again. It seemed like there were no words enough to describe what we felt. His tongue slipped past my lips, and I allowed him to kiss me like he wanted.
He wanted to prove a point, wanted to prove that he loved me as close to insanity as he claimed.
And I took what he gave because I needed the reassurance.
“God, I’ve missed you.” He pressed several kisses on my lips, never completely breaking it off.
“Don’t ever leave me,” I murmured against his lips. “I need you, Nathan.”
His gaze, both warm and dark with hunger, softened as he listened to my one request. Gray eyes swirling with an endless amount of emotions met my own as he replied, “I’ll never leave you.”
I closed my eyes again, resting my head on his chest as he swam around with me sticking to him like glue. I didn’t want to let him go. We had spent far too much time arguing, far too long without each other.
“Mom is going to ask a bunch of questions,” he said with a chuckle.
I groaned. The last thing I wanted was for his family to think I was bad for him. I cared for them very much; they were the family that I never had…I wanted them to like me. “Are they looking at us?”
“Mom is. Carter, I doubt it. The last thing he wants to see is me kissing the girl he considers his daughter.”
“I love your kisses,” I whispered.
“And I love kissing you.”
This was how we were supposed to be. Not arguing, not distant.
“I was so afraid of losing you.” The admission brought on an onslaught of different emotions, both relief and dread. Relief because he’d just told me he loved me, but dread because for the past few weeks I was sure we weren’t going to make it.
There was one thing that I absolutely adored about Nathan: his eyes. They always spoke louder than his words, always revealed what he felt. He was good with his words, but it was his eyes that gave away everything about him. They were black and dim when he was angry. When he was sad they were so pale it seemed as if something sucked the life out of them. Yet moments like this, when he looked down on me so lovingly, they were so difficult to describe.
They sparkled, even had a tinge of blue at the edge, too beautiful to do justice to them.
“This is forever, baby.”
***
Nathan covered me with a towel as we sat at the table to eat. He sat next to me then without a shirt on, making it very difficult for me to focus on the food. An arm surrounded my shoulders as he kissed my head, and my eyes fluttered closed.
After so much heartache, I felt at peace.
So much at peace, actually, that despite being hungry, I also started to get sleepy. He didn’t seem to mind, however, and held me closer while I nuzzled his neck. We’d spent a long time in the water simply talking, but with the lack of sleep from the past few days, I was extremely tired.
“Do you want to go to bed?” Deborah asked.
“Mmm…no,” I replied. “The food smells good. I’m just resting my eyes a bit.”
Frank chuckled. “You can’t eat as you sleep, dear.”
“I’m pregnant and hungry and sleepy. Try me.”
Nathan snorted, squeezing my thigh. “Let me know if you want to go to bed, baby.”
I hummed, content with the turn of events. Problems were far from over, but I hoped that with this, we would at least learn how to handle things better.
After we finished eating, Deb took out a box she’d brought with her. With everything going on, I hadn’t paid much attention to it until then. She grinned, proud and excited as she placed it in front of me.
“What is it?”
“Open it,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows. Nathan rolled his eyes, and by his expression, I had the feeling that he already knew what it was.
I opened it slowly, my eyes widening as I took in the image of the items in front of me. Different shades of yellow, soft greens, and tans were inside, and it wasn’t until I took out a pair of crochet baby booties that I realized this was all baby clothing.
“These are adorable,” I squealed, extending my arms to Deb. She pulled me into a hug, squeezing me tightly and then resting her hand over my belly.
“Guess who’s they were,” she said, nodding towards Nate.
“Oh my God, really?” I grinned at Nathan, taking out a small onesie as well as a little crocheted yellow sweater. “I love them. They are so cute, thank you.”
“Thanks, Ma.” Nate stood, giving his mom a hug and pressing a kiss on her head. It was by far one of the most adorable things I’d ever witnessed.
Nana always said that to judge whether a man would be a good husband or not, you had to take into consideration the way he treated his mother. If he was a good son, then he would be a good husband. With Nathan, those words proved to be true. He was a lovely son; he loved his parents and didn’t hide it.
I felt the baby moving again, and I grinned, hardly hiding my excitement. “Come here,” I said to Nathan.
I took his hand in mine like I’d wanted to do a few days before, placing it over my belly just as the baby kicked once again.
“That’s it.” Nathan smiled, pressing his hand a bit more firmly. “That’s our baby moving.”
I nodded, choked up. This was what it should have been like. He kissed me softly, unable to contain his joy. Deb smiled from afar, and I waved the three of them over so they could feel the baby’s movements.
Deborah nearly cried while Carter and Frank seemed more than amazed. Our baby was going to be very, very loved.
The sun set, and the evening had been so beautiful that none of us wanted to leave. However, as my exhaustion grew, we all made our way back to his parents’ house. “I want a big piece of land like this,” I stated.
He raised his eyebrows, his eyes sparkling in the dark. “Really?”
“It’s so pretty,” I whispered, getting the attention of the family with us. Carter smiled at me tenderly. “With a piece of land like this, our kids could have a place to run around. We could even have horses!” I exclaimed, making everyone chuckle. “I’m serious.”
“With the number of kids you want, you’ll hardly have time for yourself, dear,” Carter said, shaking his head.
“Oh, nonsense,” Deb chimed in, clearly agreeing with me. “We’ll all be here to help her.”
Frank seemed to agree with Carter, though, and as their discussion began, Nathan stopped walking.
I noticed Nathan’s jaw clenching as he looked around, a sigh following his uncertainty. His eyes fell on me suddenly, and the expression in them made me falter. My eyebrows pulled together in question. “What’s wrong?” I asked him.
“I need to do something.”
To say that we were all thoroughly confused was an understatement.
Until he pulled out a small box from the pocket in his swim shorts.
And knelt in front of me.
His mother gasped, and Frank muttered a single, “Holy shit.” Carter gr
inned.
And I? I was too speechless to say anything.
“I have been waiting for the perfect moment.” Nathan smiled, taking my left hand in his.
I’m dreaming.
This is a dream.
Oh. My. God.
“But any moment is perfect when I’m with you.” Nathan looked down at our joined hands thoughtfully before his eyes met mine once again. “If there’s anything I’ve learned the past weeks, it’s that I can’t live without you, Evelyn. I’m fucking crazy about you. Everything you do, everything you say…you’re the last person I want to see every night, the one I want in my arms when I wake up every morning. And fuck…you’ve made me sappy, and I don’t mind one bit.”
I blinked a few times as he opened the small box in front of me, leaving me completely awestruck by what I saw. The stone of one of Nana’s most cherished rings was in front of me, one that Carter had given her one Christmas. Back then, I didn’t know the significance of it; I was clueless about their relationship. I met Carter’s eyes briefly and found nothing but approval in his expression.
“We’ve been through so much…I knew I wanted to marry you the moment I saw your strength. You’re a mess, but you’re my mess. I admire you, Evie, and you’ve taught me so much. I love you with every ounce of my being.”
With his lips tilting up ever so slightly, Nathan said the four words I didn’t know I wanted to hear.
“Marry me, Evelyn Carson.”
Chapter 29
Evelyn
Unforgettable.
This night would forever remain engraved in my memory. This moment defined me. I’d had a few of them in my life. Actually, that was a bit of an understatement.
But I had to say, being proposed to was definitely one of them.
By the shocked expression on everyone’s faces, it was clear this was completely unplanned on Nathan’s part. Deb had her hands clasped together over her heart, and Frank had a hand on her shoulder.
Carter looked like a proud father.
And my heart…my heart beat wildly for the man kneeling in front of me. His eyes spoke volumes, and even in the darkness of the night, the bright shine of the stars illuminated them. He looked hopeful, like our whole lives were just ahead of us depending on my answer.