by Allie Santos
20
I was pissed off at Roark, pissed off at the world. It didn’t feel like things could get any worse.
Taking a deep breath, I counted my blessings. The main one being Roark was against us dying. But Eliza’s negative voice entered my head. But he doesn’t seem to have much power.
Wow, thanks, Eliza’s depressive voice.
Huffing up at the ceiling, I relaxed my tensed muscles and allowed myself to feel the feathered comfort of the bed molding to my body. As my mind wandered, I realized I hadn’t showered in a while, and even worse, I had been about to let Roark do some dirty things to me. I was suddenly glad I’d stopped him.
I groaned. Exhaustion was getting to me. I hadn’t had a good sleep in what felt like ages. My heart went out to the girls in the dungeon, but at least they had each other. I felt so alone in the cavernous room.
My drowsy musings were cut short when the doorknob wiggled. Roark.
“I know I kind of snapped, but you need to see—” My words cut off when Sabine walked in. She stared at me, and I swore I saw death in her eyes. My death. She was one-hundred percent going to kill me. My only regret was not being able to rub it in Roark’s face.
She strode over to the edge of the bed and looked down. I threw my hands up to cover my body when I realized I was still shirtless. Scuttling to the bottom of the bed, I reached for my abused shirt on the ground and slid it over my head. Sabine sat on the edge, her eyes drilling into me.
“He is very… talented, is he not?” Her smile was secretive.
My lips pursed in displeasure, and my brain automatically took a trip to their moment in the tent. My stomach pitched. How had I forgotten that? I suddenly wanted to scrub Roark’s taste off my lips.
Piercing jealousy swirled with anger at myself. He felt like… mine. But he wasn’t. He belonged to the beauty sneering down at me. All I wanted was for him to choose me. To run away with me. But that was never going to happen, was it?
“Color me surprised that you let him have his way with you after what he agreed to. You really are just a whore,” Sabine said in a faux delighted tone.
My confusion must have shown on my face.
“Oh, Roark didn’t tell you.” She giggled. “He agreed to a melding ceremony... and to be mine for one more night.”
No. My stomach dipped, dread mounting. “What is that?” My memory niggled at me. That word sounded familiar…
“Right, stupid human.” Sabine laughed. “I guess you would think of it as a wedding but… more.”
My stomach dipped. Right, the ritual he told me that bound mates together. And not only that, but he agreed to be with her? I was having a hard time breathing.
“B-but, no, that can’t be true. You aren’t mates,” I said, dumbfounded.
She looked shocked for a split second, but it quickly disappeared. Her eyes narrowed. “No, but we’ve led all our followers to believe we are.”
For a second, I wondered why she was telling me all this. But as soon as the thought entered my brain, I realized it was because she wanted me to suffer—to know that they were joining in the Fae’s more permanent version of marriage.
I needed to talk to Roark, to convince him not to do this…
Sabine must have felt me tense because she placed a threatening hand on my shoulder. “It will be the first since magic was bound. You see, only mates can perform this ceremony. This will be symbolic of hope to my people. I came to formally invite you. Just in case he didn’t let you in on it.” She smiled. “It’s today at sundown. Magical, yes?”
But they weren’t mates! He said so himself. There were no mates.
“It won’t work.” I narrowed my eyes at her.
She threw her head back and laughed. “You forget… I have dark magic at my disposal.”
Shock. I was shocked. I didn’t want to believe the crap coming from her mouth. This was just another in her long string of lies. It had to be. She was going to use black magic to force a melding? I needed to tell him. He definitely wouldn’t agree to this… Would he? When we could escape or literally anything else. But all of this was for magic. To get it back, for him and his people.
My memory decided to pull up the look on his face when he had spoken of his magic. Desire and greed had flickered in his gaze. He was doing all of this because he wanted it back. That’s what it had been about this whole time.
Logic had helped me all my life. It had helped me bargain with my parents. In school. My ex-boyfriend. I’d always tried to think about everything, but my line was drawn. I couldn’t think with the churning emotions inside of me. I just snapped.
Lunging at Sabine, I aimed for her eyes, hoping that even in her species, they were tender.
She grasped my hands exactly an inch away from her face. Her eyes were wide with shock and apprehension before it was wiped away, only to be replaced with rage. I was woman enough to know I couldn’t take her.
She squeezed my arms, the bones creaking under her fingers. I couldn’t hold back a yelp that exploded out of me. Thankfully, that was what made her release me. She smiled at me with narrowed eyes. “Ah, so you do have fight in you.”
My chest heaved. “You need to leave Roark alone. He’s too prideful to see what you’re doing to him.”
“Are you going to make me leave him alone?” she mocked. My stomach burned with rage. “Stop moving,” she ordered, and I froze. Black shadows flickered in her eyes, gone just as quickly as they’d arrived. I gritted my teeth because it was the only thing I could do. Damn her. Damn her to hell.
“Fae have a specific ability, mine is persuasion. But with the magic I’ve stolen from him, it boosts my own.” She smiled happily. “That day I found him half-dead. Emily connected his magic to me and siphoning off him has been too easy. He blames his deteriorating ability to use magic on the Queen.” Sabine clearly thought she was brilliant for hiding what she’d been doing. “Not many are graced with persuasion like me. Roark’s grandfather was the only one to wield the ability to exponential heights. He did many great things,” she said like an afterthought.
I tried to inch away from her, uncomfortable with how close she was getting to me.
She manifested a plump peach in her hand and crunched into it. “I can also use his ability.” She gave me a secretive wink. “Isn’t it amazing what Roark’s power can do? He’s probably one of the most powerful Fae, and yet he has no clue that I’ve been taking from him.” She cackled. “I’ve been very careful not to use his power around him. He’s known me a long time, you know.” She winked meaningfully.
“That’s awfu—”
“Don’t speak.”
Freaking out, I tried to force words from my throat, But I didn’t make a sound. I clutched my neck, glaring at her.
“What was that?” she asked and tilted her head, looking at me intently. “You’re going to smile when you watch Roark and I get melded? As we show our people a united front?” I wanted to spit out a slew of obscenities, but I couldn’t. “Nod.” she ordered.
I just sat frozen and involuntarily moved my head like a puppet. I couldn’t control my neck, and I wanted to cry in frustration.
“You won’t say anything about our conversation or the topic of melding to any Fae.” She made me shake my head. “He doesn’t know you, and your little group will be in attendance. That’s a little surprise from me. He was probably not even going to tell you.” Sabine frowned exaggeratedly. “Another interesting little tidbit is that since we’ve already fucked, exchanging blood will complete the melding. He thinks it’s all an act, but he will be very surprised when he can sense me as you would sense a mate.”
That asshole. This closeness she described, it made my stomach drop. He would turn against me, and all the kindness he had shown me would disappear. The anger sizzling through me ratcheted up, intermixing with betrayal and the blossoming seeds of hate.
That scared me most of all.
In my twenty-three years, I had managed to shrug hate off like a bad co
at. This was the one that had taken root. The way my parents neglected me and repeatedly left me with nothing should have hurt worse. But this felt like it would be my breaking point. I was always second best.
She tossed the half-eaten peach to the side and reached out, dragging my sleeve over my elbow. With one of her nails, she sliced a cut across my inner arm. A line of my blood rose up, and she gripped my arm and turned it upside down. Red droplets plunked into a vial she held. It probably would have stung under normal circumstances, but I was too numb to feel it.
“You want to know what the best part of all of this? You’re his real mate,” she said offhandedly. I stared up, knowing and yet not comprehending what she was saying. “That’s why I need your blood for my melding to your mate. You complete him and all the things about meant to be. I had Emily scryed for you specifically. It was my luck that you’d already reached Fae maturity. It was the only way your blood was useful. Darkling magic will activate and mimic your mate bond using your blood. I wish I could tell Roark. It would destroy him.”
Capping the vial, she slipped it into one of her pockets. “If only he knew the way he had treated his little mate. Like garbage… like nothing. While he stood by and let me break you and hurt you, eventually kill you…” She trailed off and shrugged, looking as if she was speaking to herself. “Or I could keep you around, so I’ll always be able to control Roark. Haven’t decided, but the time will come when he will know you were the one. After it’s too late and our binds are gone. It’s what’s stifling his senses, but by then you might be dead.” Her fingertips touched my cheek. The intense change in behavior threw me off balance. “Sad that the damage will be done. He will never forgive himself.”
My chest tightened. I struggled to wrap my head around what she was saying. I couldn’t be his mate. My pulse beat quickly, and I blinked rapidly. She had to be mistaken. Oh, God. This would explain the connection I had to him. My need to be near him. A whimper slipped from my lips.
“Anyway,” she said, bouncing onto her feet and flouncing to the door. Her sudden mood change gave me whiplash. “I’ve decided that you and your friends can get cleaned up for my melding. Wouldn’t want you stinking up the place.”
21
As soon as the door closed behind Sabine, my body dropped like a string had been cut. I flopped back onto the bed and stared up at the canopy.
I had a mate? One who was going to tie himself to another.
Sure, I felt a strange connection to Roark, one that both scared and enthralled me. But it had to do with our time alone together where I had gotten to know the vulnerable side of him.
Even if I were to trust the words of the most untrustworthy person in the world, and we were mates, it was moot. He had chosen her and his magic and whatever else he was trying to do. He was on his own path, and it didn’t include me.
The realization that he was going to bond to someone else struck me. Even if I put aside the whole mate thing, betrayal and hurt lingered. I actually liked him. Helplessness nibbled at me. Roark was going down the wrong track, and I’d tried to sway him off it, but he wouldn’t budge.
He’d made his choice, and it wasn’t me. I needed to get over the idea of us. Even if we were mates.
The door slammed open, and Roark strode in with a glare. It couldn’t have been long since he’d left. He paused, tilted his head, and narrowed his eyes. “I can’t leave you for one second,” he muttered. “What did she say to you? Did she hurt you?”
I opened my mouth and tried to say yes, she took my blood and said all this crazy shit, but the words got stuck in my throat.
“Are you all right?” A little crinkle of concern graced his eyebrows.
My head nodded of its own accord, even though I certainly didn’t do it myself. I straightened my posture, shocked.
“I—” I started, but the words got stuck again. Sabine had used magic to keep me quiet. Anger boiled inside me. “You told me about mates and how there haven’t been any since magic was bound. What does being mated mean?” Yes! I managed to say something.
“Mates are vital to my race’s existence. We only ever get one. Mated pairs can conceive children, and their life forces are bound together after a melding.” He hesitated over the last word. I swallowed, badly wanting to ask about it but literally unable to. “Mates have not found each other because magic is gone. The effect is our population has lessened. This is the damage that the Queen has inflicted. Don’t you see why I feel duty-bound to help my people? Why I resorted to listening to one line of an incomplete prophesy?” He raked his hands through his hair. “I’m desperate.”
I looked down at my lap and nodded shortly. Yes, I understood what he was saying.
It was the whole sacrifice-the-few-for-the-whole bit. It just sucked being part of the few. I felt bad for thinking it was all an excuse for wanting magic to return. Could I blame him for choosing to help Fae if their species was dwindling?
How could I compete with an entire people relying on him? And did I even want to?
A selfish part of me still wanted to tell him he could help his people without melding, but I choked on the words Sabine made me unable to speak. The frustration made tears prickle at my eyes.
“I’m just scared,” I admitted. “And I… need you, Roark.”
A brilliant grin flashed across his face as he sat next to me and leaned his forehead against mine. “I need you,” he rasped and dug his hands into my hair. “I will protect you. Nothing will harm you.”
I believed him.
“Don’t trust her,” I said, knowing he would understand who I was talking about.
He kissed my forehead. “I know how to control her, sweet Rae. Can’t you trust me?”
There was an ache in my heart. I had the sense that he was more set on the melding after this conversation.
A tear slipped down my cheek. He looked pained as his gaze attached itself to the slow movement. Dread whirled through every inch of me because, even though he didn’t know it, this was my way of saying goodbye. I would escape somehow. I would find a way.
“I swear it to you. I will protect you.” Palming my face, he leaned down to kiss the wet trail away. “I have made plans to ensure your safety,” he said, a guilty expression flicking across on his face.
Was he going to tell me? If he did, I would wave my hands around, shake my head, mime being against it, something, but he didn’t.
“Don’t worry yourself. Sabine and I made a deal. She will not touch you or your friends. This is how I can be sure that I can protect you, while we find another way to unbind magic. You’re mine.” With a caress on my face, he turned away. “Rest, I have made sure your friends are brought here to rest for the night. Once tonight is done with… you and I will not be separated.”
He turned on his heel. A shot of disappointment went through me. He really hadn’t told me.
“Where are you going?” I asked tightly.
He stopped at the door but didn’t turn to face me. His shoulders tensed imperceptibly. “To get something over with,” he said and stepped out.
The door clicked shut behind him, and I fell back with a frustrated yell. Don’t do it. I wanted to yell after him, but I knew I’d just choke on the words. I didn’t think Sabine could have gotten any eviler than dislocating my ankle and overall physical abuse. But she had far surpassed herself. She wanted me to suffer knowing about their impending melding. To suffer and sit by helplessly, unable to say anything to Roark.
I understood why he would not see me tonight. Sabine hadn’t had any qualms about rubbing them having sex in my face. My throat tightened. That would be a good time to plan an escape.
I couldn’t dwell. Plans needed to be made. Roark may have had all the trust in the world for that snake, but I knew she was biding her time to slit my throat along with all of my new friends. Friends I needed to help. I pushed off the bed, determined to sneak out of the room and start investigating.
Before I could make a move, the door opened. I groa
ned and dropped on the bed, defeated. I had the shittiest luck. I closed my eyes, a dark part of myself hoping it was Sabine with a knife, ready to end me once and for all.
A throat cleared. I lifted my head and stared into the piercing brown eyes that handsomely matched the red shock of hair slicked back atop his head. The Captain.
“What do you want?” I said bluntly, giving up on any sort of manners.
“I am to escort you to the communal bathing room where the other humans are currently cleaning themselves.”
I shot up. “Please, let this be true.”
“It is,” he said curtly as he stared ahead, arms crossed behind his back.
“Take me to them,” I said breathily.
He nodded curtly. A sense of dread climbed into me when the door clicked shut.
“This will be safer than the hallways. Roark and Sabine are being fitted for their melding.”
My heart sank at his words while my lips twisted in irritation. That’s what Roark was doing? When the Captain stepped closer to me and began looking around, I worried for a second that he was sent to kill me. After moments of tilting his head as if trying to listen for something, he relaxed his stance.
“I will help you escape,” he said quietly.
“Why?” Obviously, I was more than a bit skeptical. Maybe it was a cruel trick?
“I’m a plant for the Queen,” he told me, and I stared at him, openmouthed. “She is not how these miscreants describe her to be. She’s made mistakes like all beings, but she is well-meaning. She extends an offer of protection to you.”
“Y-you’re not messing with me,” I stuttered.
“No,” he said with a small smile tilting the corner of his lips. “Make sure you tell your human friends to trust me when the time comes. We make our move after the melding.” At the mention of the melding, my heart thumped faster. His head tilted. “Are you well?”
If he was team human, might as well test out what information he had. “Why do you sound disapproving when you said… that?” I couldn’t get the word out, Sabine’s hold making me sound incredibly vague. Thankfully, he understood what I asked.