He’s been trying to cheer me up all day. We’ve watched movies and played cards. Now, he walks over to the stereo and is looking through his CDs. I see him smile as he loads it. He walks over to me and pulls me up off the couch. I’ve been sitting still all day and the nausea has eased a little, so I let him pull me up. He stands beside me so we’re both facing the same direction and when I hear what song he’s played, I actually laugh.
From the beginning, Bradley knew he was gay and didn’t hide it. This allowed him to be free to be who he wanted, no matter how crazy, different, or outrageous. His energy has always been infectious. I remember one day, back when we were younger and at his house having a picnic, it started raining so we all came indoors. Bored because we were stuck inside, he went into his room and came back with a tape and put it in their stereo and then lined us all up. My brothers and sister and my aunts, but not my uncles, my grandpa, or his dad, Uncle Duke. But he did manage to get our grandma in line. That’s the day he attempted to teach us all The Rocky Horror Picture Show’s “Time Warp.” We laughed so hard that day. Not one of us had very good rhythm. My grandpa, uncles, and dad sat doubled over laughing at our attempts. That was until my cousin started showing my grandma how to do the pelvic thrust, at which point all the men rushed from the room, leaving Bradley and the women laughing even harder.
Dancing around and laughing has made me feel light-headed and nauseous again, so I decide it’s time to go to bed, even though I’d prefer to stay here with Bradley all night. I know he’s been wanting to call and talk with Connor, and I want to give him that time. So I say goodnight and head into my room. After brushing my teeth and washing my face, I go lay down. I hadn’t planned on falling asleep and didn’t realize I did until I startle awake, on alert. It’s dark and quiet, but I feel him. He’s here. Right here.
“Hey, baby,” I hear him say as his hand caresses my face. I brace for the hit that doesn’t come. I can see his silhouette sitting next to me from the moon shining in through my curtains, but it’s still dark in my room. “We’re only going to have a second, so hop up and get dressed,” he says, and he pats me on my leg, stands, and waits.
I don’t know where this comes from but I know if I leave, the odds of me coming back are slim so I take a chance. “No, Rocky. I won’t go. You can’t make me and if you try to force me, I’ll scream.”
“I won’t need to force you, Jaycee. You’ll come willingly. Here, take this.” He reaches out for my hand and places something in it. I know what it is immediately. It’s the military coin that belonged to my grandpa. On one side, there’s an eagle and it’s raised. I rub my fingers across it and anger starts to build.
My grandpa gave it to my grandma before he passed. She keeps it on her all day except for when she sleeps. Only then does she set it on her nightstand beside her bed. If he has this, he’s been in her room. He’s reminding me he can get to her whenever he wants.
Now I’m pissed and I jerk my legs off the bed as he laughs at my anger. “I’ll kill you myself Rocky. You leave her the HELL alone.” His laughter stops as he reaches out and grabs me by my throat. He shoves me all the way across the room into the bathroom until he has me cornered. I feel my feet leave the ground and my hands grab out for his wrists but his grip on my throat intensifies. I try scratching his arm and digging my nails into his wrists, but it doesn’t faze him. He’s going to kill me. Before the dark comes again, I hear him say in a menacing whisper through his teeth, “Baby, talking to me like that is a mistake.” The next thing I remember is being on the floor of my bathroom with him standing over me. My face is burning and my throat is hurting. He’s hit me. I can feel my eyes starting to swell shut and my arms and legs feel heavy and they hurt.
I’m not sure what’s happening, but I hear my cousin yell through my door that there’s a car on fire at the end of the street and he’s called 911. Nash must have arrived because I hear him say they’re going to check it out and to stay in my room with the door locked. Little do they know my monster is with me behind my locked door.
“That’s our cue, Jaycee. Let’s go.” I don’t move because I’m weak and my body hurts. I’m not able to see anything either because my eyes have swollen shut so he yanks me up by my wrist and I feel my shoulder pop painfully but I’m too out of it to even scream. He leans down, pushing his shoulder into my stomach and throws me over his shoulder and calmly opens the door to my bedroom, walks out with me over his shoulder and out the back door of the house into the night.
He walks like this for a few minutes, me hanging limp over his shoulder, but when I see car lights coming towards us, I start hoping it’s help. The car stops and I hear a car door open. Oh God, please help me, my mind screams.
“Why the hell do you have her? Jesus, Rocky. What did you do to her? Is she dead?” It’s Kelly.
“Shut the fuck up and open the door. Hurry,” he says as I hear footsteps and then a door open. He leans down and surprisingly places me gently in the back seat. I hear shuffling and then two doors slam shut and I feel the car shift into gear and then we’re driving. “Rocky, she looks really bad,” I hear Kelly say in a concerned voice. “Jaycee, hey, you okay?” she asks. I can only moan. “Jaycee, I’m so sorry. Rocky, we need to get her to a hospital. I think she’s dying.”
“Shut the fuck up, Kelly. I mean, do you ever just shut the fuck up? You fucking hate her but now you’re so fucking concerned? What the fuck is going on?” After a few minutes he slams the car brakes as I feel the car swerve to a quick stop. I hear a door open and I feel him tuck his hands underneath my arms and he starts pulling me from the car and then cradles me like a baby and carries me a short distance. I feel him lay me in grass. He leans down and begins, “Now, Jaycee, I know you love me and I love you. That’s why I can’t have your family interfering and trying to keep me from seeing you. What do you think we should do about them? Hmmm?” and I feel him brush the hair back from my face.
I hear another car door open. “Rocky, you said they had something that belonged to you. To set that car on fire to distract them so you could get it. You were supposed to just run and grab it, not bring her. Leave her here and come back for whatever it is later. They’ll find her, but we need to go.”
“She’s what belongs to me, Kelly. She’s what I came for. Now. Shut. Up,” he says, keeping his back to her and his voice to me.
“They’ll know she’s gone by now, Rocky. They’re going to be looking for her and the cops have already been looking for you. Let’s go,” she pleads.
“Baby, is that what you want for me to do, leave you here for the ants and vultures ?” and he cups my cheek. “I wanted to bring you, but I’m seeing I can’t do that yet. I guess I should go, but I’ll be back.” He takes in a deep breath and releases it. “But baby, know this, each time I have to fight like this but then leave you again, I’m going to kill one of those annoying pricks in your family.” And he kisses my cheek.
I guess it’s my thinking I’m already dead that causes me to say what I say next, and even though it comes out barely a hoarse whisper, he must hear my resolve. “Rocky. I don’t love you. You’re crazy. I. Hate. You.” I hear him stand and sigh. Then I feel blows to my stomach, arms, and legs. But they’re not from his fists. He’s kicking me and I can’t breathe.
“Jesus Christ, Rocky. What the fuck is wrong with you? She’s right, you’re crazy. I’m calling the cops,” she screams.
“Kelly, that was the last time, ever.” I vaguely hear a snap, click, and then a boom, followed by a thud. “Well, that wasn’t part of my plan, but I warned her time and time again to stop with the threats. Plus, all these years, same old shit, but she’s been up to something lately. I’ll figure it all out soon enough. But for now, I hear those pricks coming so I got to go, but I’ll be seeing you again real soon. Remember what I said, baby?”
I lie still and feign dead. Maybe like the lesson my grandpa taught me about the snake, Rocky, if h
e doesn’t sense movement, will slither away.
It works. I hear footsteps and then the car doors slam shut and he drives off. Relief comes and I let go and fall into an abyss of darkness.
Chapter 14
I start to move when I notice everything hurts. I try opening my eyes but the lights are too bright and it’s causing my head to hurt. What’s going on? Where am I? But then I start to remember and panic sets in. I try to open my eyes again but they’re too heavy. I try so hard to scream but it just comes out as a light moan.
“Hush...Jaycee. You’re okay. Get the nurse, Savannah,” I hear my grandma say and I feel her holding my hand and then I feel someone take the other and again I start to panic. “Jaycee, it’s Aunt Paige. Honey, you’re okay. Please relax.” I can’t get my eyes to open but I can feel tears sliding out the sides of my eyes into my hair. I keep trying to open my eyes but can do nothing more than slightly squint with the bright light.
“Turn out the lights,” I hear a man’s voice say softly. “The light is too bright and her eyes are having a hard time adjusting. It probably hurts.” I hear the voice coming closer as the lights go off in the room, but I hear a click and a soft light comes on. “Ms. McGinty, Jaycee, I’m Sergeant Bradshaw—Max Bradshaw—and I’m a physical therapist here at the hospital. I was walking by your room when your family came out to say you’re awake. I understand you’ve been out for a while and you’re a bit disoriented, so I came in to check on you while your nurse phones your doctor. She’ll be here in a moment.” I can feel tugs on my arms and some beeping going on around my head. “If you understand what I’m saying, squeeze my fingers,” he says, and I feel a warm hand around mine. He places two fingers in my palm and closes my hand around them, making a fist as he softly rubs my arm. “Do you understand?” he asks, and with all my might I squeeze his fingers. “Good job. Okay, so you were injured and you’ve been here at the hospital at Fort Sam Houston recovering for a few days, but you’re okay.”
Injured? A few days? Memories start flooding my mind and I start hyperventilating. Rocky. He killed Kelly and tried to kill me. I start thrashing in the bed trying to get away, but I’m being held down.
“Get the nurse, now. Tell her she’s having a panic attack.” He keeps one hand on my shoulder and another at my waist. “Jaycee, you’re okay. You’re safe.” I keep trying to cry out but I can’t. “Jayc, settle. God please, settle. I promise. You. Are. Safe. I won’t let anyone hurt you.” Something about the way he’s talking and saying my name and the tone of his voice starts to calm me. His words are not empty. He’s making me a promise, but why? I start to calm and as my breathing slows, I turn my head towards his voice where I can sense him and I start fluttering my eyes open.
Now that the room is darker my vision starts to focus. At first he’s a shadow but then his features come together. I can see he has brown hair and his eyes are dark brown, almost black. He has a light olive complexion that reminds me of something tropical. I keep looking at him and then he smiles.
“Hi Jaycee. Welcome back,” he says and he pushes my hair back from all around my face. “Your doctor will be here soon.” I notice he keeps his hand on my waist just in case I start to panic again. He’s still smiling down at me and I see he has full lips but his cheeks catch my attention. He has deep dimples. I know that smile. I know him.
I start to relax when I hear a door open and voices in the doorway. They’re getting closer and I can’t help it, I start to panic again and I stare at him, pleading to help me and I try to say his name but can only mouth, “Max.” “Hey, now. It’s your doctor. He needs to look you over. Make sure you’re okay.” When he starts to move away my breathing escalates again. He’s made me feel safe. I believe him. He can’t leave. The doctor comes to the side of my bed and touches my arm. “Ms. McGinty, I’m Dr. Kilpatrick.” I flash my eyes to the doctor but back to Max. Max hasn’t taken his eyes from mine. He’s keeping his promise. He’s watching over me.
“Ms. McGinty, do you remember why you’re here? Here at the hospital?” he asks with compassion. All I can do is close my eyes and let the tears fall. I remember. My breathing comes in heavy. I want to wail but I can’t. “Jaycee, it’s okay. Look at me.” As I turn my head to the voice, Max is looking at me. “Do you remember?” he asks. I finally get my head to nod yes. I try speaking but my voice comes out in a croak. I start lifting my hand to my throat when Max takes it and places it in his hand to stop me. “Jaycee, try to keep still. You had some injuries to your neck and damage to your throat. It’s bruised.” I remember Rocky choking me, lifting me off the ground by my throat. “He hurt me, Rocky hurt me,” I say, but it comes out as scratchy and hoarse. “Try whispering, Jaycee.” I try to clear my throat and cringe from the pain and finally I whisper, “Rocky. He hurt me.” I see a flare of anger cross Max’s face and then I hear the doctor say angrily but with care and caution, “Ms. McGinty, the person who hurt you, the police have him. He’s in jail. He was picked up the same night he did this to you. Detectives have been stopping by daily to check on you and they’ll have more details. But what I can tell you is the woman who was involved in abducting you is dead and the man is in police custody.”
“My family?” I whisper. “No one was hurt but you, that I know of. You’ve had a parade of family in and out since you were brought in. I’m pretty sure your family that was just here is making phone calls to all of them as we speak.” I nod while I see him go over and wash his hands and come back to me. “While they do that I need to examine you a little and find out your pain level and explain your injuries to you. I’m going to call in a female nurse but otherwise you may want to have some privacy, Ms. McGinty.” But I reach out for Max’s hand and he takes mine. “Not him. Please let him stay.” I don’t know why yet, but I want him to stay.
The doctor looks to Max and back to me. “Some of it is very private, Ms. McGinty, are you sure?” he asks. “Yes,” I assure him but I have no clue as to what he is about to tell me. He walks back to the door and I hear him mumble something. When he returns, two nurses are with him. They walk to the end of the bed and smile warmly at me. “This is Corporal Blass and this is Corporal Rodriquez. Because of protocol they need to be here, but what we say in here is strictly private,” the doctor assures me. I nod that I understand and so he continues. “Okay, well, your shoulder was dislocated, so we reset it and it’s in a sling. You may need some physical therapy, although I doubt it, but if you do, I’m sure Sergeant Bradshaw could help you with that.” I crinkle my forehead in thought. Why does that name sound so familiar? Bradshaw. I know it but I can’t place it yet. “He’s one of our PT therapists and works with our wounded warriors.” I turn my eyes to Max. He’s been watching and listening to the doctor. He turns his eyes down to me and smiles. I try to smile back, even though it’s hollow, but I can’t and instead I frown, which causes him to frown.
“You have contusions over sixty percent of your body, Ms. McGinty. Your face was pretty swollen when you came in. We kept you in a medically induced coma for almost four days so your body could heal. If you had been awake, the pain would have been almost unbearable. Do you understand so far?” I look to the doctor and nod. “Good,” he continues, explaining as he gently touches the areas he has been referring to. “The swelling on your face is almost all the way down and your contusions—or bruises—are fading and turning yellow which looks really bad, but I’m going to tell you that it’s much better than when you came in. I want you to be prepared for what you’ll see when you look in the mirror once you’re able to get up and around. Remember, it’s nothing that’s permanent.” I look at the nurses and to Max as the doctor pulls up a nearby stool and rolls it closer to the edge of the bed and sits down on it. He takes a breath and leans his hands on the railing. He looks to Max and conveys something with his eyes that has Max moving closer and my holding my hand tighter, and Corporals Rodriquez and Blass each stand a little closer with Corporal Blass putting a comforting h
and on my ankle.
“Ms. McGinty, did you know you were pregnant?” What? My eyes fly to the doctor. “NOOOO!” I scream, but it only comes out a whisper and I feel Corporal Blass start to rub my leg trying to calm me as Corporal Rodriguez comes to stand closer to the doctor and takes my other hand. “I’m pregnant?” I ask, and I start to cry as the doctor puts his hand on my arm and gently squeezes. “No. Ms. McGinty, you were. I’m very sorry, but you miscarried. The night you were brought into the emergency room, you had already lost the baby. You were bleeding and the routine blood work we ordered showed a positive result. The OB specialist we called down did an exam and she thinks you were about six to eight weeks along from the HCG levels on the blood work.” I start thinking. That was the night he raped me.
The doctor continues, “A big bruise was found starting to form on your stomach near your ribs that night. We think he hit or kicked you.” He looks to Max and back to me and his eyes get extra soft and kind. “The OB found older bruising and tears along your vaginal walls during her exam to check on the bleeding. They were older, healing but still visible. She theorized you had been violated. You don’t have to answer me if you don’t want to, but I wanted to give you a heads-up that this information was given to police along with everything else, so they’re probably going to be asking you about it. Do you remember what happened? Were you raped, Ms. McGinty?” I nod to the doctor and say, “He kicked me that night but before, a few weeks ago, he raped me,” but even my whisper is faint now. I think I hear Max growl and I look over and his jaw is clenched shut. Corporal Rodriguez has a firm grip on my hand and has unfallen tears in her eyes and Corporal Blass is looking down but still rubbing my leg. I’m so caught up in everything I’m being told that nothing else registers except I was pregnant and how ashamed I am at the relief that I’m not now. They think I’m upset about being raped when inside I’m grateful I won’t have any ties to Rocky and that fills me with shame.
Falling Into Blue Page 10