She wrote out a quick note for Grant telling him she’d left, then grabbed a food bar and the bag of clothes she’d packed for Mom before hurrying out to her truck. Her thoughts centered on him as she drove, how he’d popped into her life so fully after a two-year dry spell where she’d been convinced he’d never return. She’d hoped a few weeks of his dedication would be enough time to trust that he’d stay here for good, but now she could see that wasn’t the case.
By the time Kallie had driven the forty-five miles to Broken Bow, where the hospital was located, she’d cried all her tears. She hoped her face didn’t look too red and swollen as she turned into the parking and trekked up to her mom’s room. She now knew where Grant’s heart lay, and it wasn’t with the farm, with the kids, or with her.
Mom was awake and alert when Kallie stepped in, a much-improved state over yesterday.
“Did you sleep, Mom?”
“Oh, a little. You know hospital beds,” Mom laughed softly. “I’m ready to leave, though.”
“Well, I brought you some clothes.” Kallie held up the plastic sack she carried. “We’ll have you heading home in no time.”
The smile that lit Mom’s face was full of hope, and it brightened Kallie’s weary heart, too. Being with Mom really was like going home. Sure, there was more hurt to heal. But Kallie was certain they were well on their way.
When the doctor said everything looked good, they headed for the truck.
“Mom?” Kallie asked as they drove home. “What happened with the accident? How’d you hit that embankment?”
Mom sighed. “Well, I had a lot on my mind, and one of my grocery bags tipped over on the passenger seat, so I reached for it, not really thinking. I suppose that was it.”
Kallie glanced Mom’s direction. “You had a lot on your mind?”
“Yeah, but it was nothing.”
“Enough to make you run into an embankment.”
“I told you, that was the groceries’ doing.” Another sigh escaped Mom, and she turned to the window.
Hmm. Maybe Kallie’s lack of communication skills was inherited.
“Mom. I can tell you’re thinking about something. What’s going on?”
“It’s really nothing.”
“I’m not sure I believe that.”
“I was trying to decide if I should stick around, all right?”
Kallie nearly veered toward the highway’s shoulder. Instead, she gripped her steering wheel tightly and threw her mom a hard stare. “You want to leave?”
Her focus dropping to her hands, Mom frowned. Her chin trembled before she regained control of it. “Not because I want to. I was thinking about my conversation with Grant and then with you, and how my attempt at helpfulness was actually a hindrance.”
Maybe it hadn’t been a hindrance after all. But Kallie kept the thought to herself. She knew she needed to talk to Grant, even if everything inside her screamed for her to sweep it under the rug and just ask him to leave.
The occasional tree passed on either side of the highway. Not a lot of those out on the prairie. Kallie waited for her mom to continue.
“I missed that time in your life. Young romance. When boys are chasing you, and I get to send them off.” A wry smile crawled up Mom’s face. “And I’m coming to realize you’re a grown woman now. You don’t need anyone doing that for you. I’m sorry I didn’t see it.”
“Mom, just because I’m a grown woman doesn’t mean I don’t need you.”
“No, I know.” She seemed to be weighing her thoughts. “But it’s time for me to find my role in life. Get a job somewhere and plug back into society.” Her eyes sparkled. “Don’t worry. I’ll be back to visit. You can’t get rid of Grandma that easily.” She met Kallie’s gaze. “Can’t get rid of Mama that easily, either.”
Kallie smiled, her heart warming. It was a blessing to be remembered. “Oh, I have a letter for you. It’s from Dad.”
“Your dad?” Mom’s eyes rounded. “He wrote to me?”
“The attorney just gave it to me yesterday, along with a note for me.” Keeping her eyes on the road, she slipped it from her purse and handed mom’s note over. “In the craziness of last night, I didn’t even get a chance to finish reading mine.”
Mom pressed the note to her heart, then held it in her lap. “Thank you. I’ll read it later—when I can soak it in.”
Kallie nodded. “Totally get that.” She’d be doing the same with hers.
Her phone rang.
She glanced at it and frowned. “It’s Grant.” Answering it, she stuck it between her ear and shoulder. “Hello?”
“Kallie, we’re at the ER in Broken Bow.” His voice sounded matter-of-fact, but that didn’t stop Kallie’s heart rate from spiking. “Peter’s fever continued to climb, so we came in. It’s coming back down now, but just wanted to give you a heads-up.”
A heads-up that her baby was in the emergency room? Kallie pulled off at a gravel road and turned the truck back toward Broken Bow. “We’ll be there in ten minutes.”
She hung up and dropped the phone in her lap, then gripped the wheel with white knuckles.
“What’s going on?” Mom asked.
“Peter’s in the ER for his fever. Grant said it kept going up.”
“Oh, Lord, watch over that sweet baby,” Mom whispered, sitting back against the passenger seat.
“Sorry to cart you back into town, Mom. I know I’m supposed to get you home to rest—”
“Don’t think on it a second longer,” Mom reassured, placing a hand on Kallie’s knee. “I’m fine. It won’t hurt me in the slightest to go home a little later than we’d planned.”
Kallie closed her eyes for the instant she could allow herself to before returning her focus to the road. All she wanted to do was find Peter and Ainsley, whisk them away to some protected place and hold them close. It had taken a lot for her to give up control and let Grant help her with caring for the kids. But she knew this to be true—she should have been the one there for Peter when he needed her most. That was a mother’s job, and she’d completely missed the mark.
Chapter Ten
“Right in here.”
Grant looked up as an ER nurse opened the examination room door and let Kallie inside.
It was a small room with an exam table in the middle and various instruments attached to the walls surrounding it. One chair sat near the door, but Kallie zeroed in on the table, where Peter and Ainsley sat on Grant’s lap. He had his phone out, showing them videos of themselves. Ainsley beamed and was pointing at the screen, while Peter had snuggled into Grant’s chest, watching the screen with a stoic expression, as if he might fall asleep.
Kallie dropped her purse on the chair and made her way around the side of the table. She kissed Ainsley’s head before lifting Peter out of Grant’s arms.
He watched her as she eyed Ainsley, who was glued to the video. Guilt poked him. Kallie didn’t like the kids to get screen time. He cleared his throat. “Sorry, I didn’t know we’d be in here so long. I didn’t have anything else for them to do and they were getting bored.”
She didn’t say anything. Only turned her attention to their son and cradled him closer. “Hi, punkin. Everything’s all right.”
“Where’s your mom?”
“In the pickup, waiting. What’s his temperature now?”
“He’s reading at 102-point-something. They gave him something to bring the fever down. We’re waiting on test results.”
Kallie’s eyes widened. “Tests? For what?”
“Lots of things. Trying to make sure they understand what’s causing the fever.”
Exhaling, she began to pace. “This is my fault. I should have done something to prevent this from happening.”
“It wasn’t your fault.”
“If I’d been up with him all night, maybe I could have done som
ething. I could have called the hospital and told them I’d pick Mom up later than planned. Or brought the kids with me—”
“Kallie, enough. Don’t beat yourself up. You did everything right.”
He was the one who’d done everything wrong.
If he hadn’t been paying so much attention to his pursuits last night, maybe he would’ve caught Peter’s rising fever before it got too high.
All morning in the ER, he’d mulled over Edith’s words to him the other day.
Kallie needs a dependable father to her children.
This training business is all about you rather than the farm.
And on both counts, she was right. In so many ways, he’d let his quest to become a successful, opposite-of-his-own-father dad get in the way of what was most important. He’d focused too much on self-achievement rather than on connecting with his kids—the whole reason he was out here in the first place.
Peter and Ainsley needed a dependable father—one who wouldn’t set them aside to achieve his own goals. He’d fallen short of that standard.
Fussing, Peter pulled himself closer to Kallie’s chest, grabbing hold of her shirt with his strong yet tiny hands. He needed his mother, and she’d been right this whole time in not giving up control. No one knew these kids like she did. And no matter how Grant tried, he wasn’t sure he could catch up and become the father they needed.
Kallie watched their son, her brows low over her eyes. “If anything happened to him while I’d taken a break,” she mumbled, “I’d never be able to forgive myself.”
“You really know how to kick a guy when he’s down.”
“I only meant—”
“I know what you meant. That you don’t trust me to care for our kids, and you probably don’t trust anyone to do that job but yourself.”
Her eyes flashed. “Is that so wrong? As far as I’m concerned, I’m the only trustworthy one around here.”
His defenses rose. “Um, does keeping the kids a secret for two years ring a bell?”
“Does applying for a job in North Dakota?”
She flung the words so hard at him, he had to jerk back. “You saw my email?”
“And I’m glad I did, too, because now I know where your allegiance is. It’s with me, myself and I, and we’re just a part of your plans if it’s convenient.”
A knock on the door interrupted them and a nurse stepped in. The man glanced between Grant and Kallie. “Sorry, am I interrupting something?”
“No,” they said in unison.
“Okay. Well, we got the test results back,” he said, folding his arms and leaning against the wall.
Thankfully, it wasn’t any of the major illnesses or infections they’d tested for. It was only a virus that would run its course over the next couple days. They were free to take Peter home.
Outside the hospital, the sun shone brightly and the birds sang in the nearby cottonwoods, but a storm brewed in Grant’s chest worse than a ravaging hailstorm. Kallie, with Peter on one hip, strode a few steps ahead of him.
“Kal, I was looking into a job that was offered to me out of the blue.”
“That makes it so much better. Thanks.”
Sighing, he glanced at the sky. “I’d hoped we’d all go up there together.”
She whirled to face him. “And what? Leave my dad’s farm like it meant nothing to us?”
“I only sent in my application because you said we were selling.”
“Who said we’re selling the farm? I know I mentioned it as a possibility, but I was also speaking out of frustration. You should have talked to me about it.”
“Like that would have made any difference.” He approached, wishing he had any idea of what Kallie was thinking half the time. “No one jumps around here without asking you how high. Wouldn’t matter what I wanted or what I thought was best for the family because we’re not a partnership like we’re supposed to be.”
“You’re right about that.” She tossed him her keys. “You’re taking my pickup home. I’m taking your truck so I can have the kids with me.”
Grant narrowed his eyes. “Are you serious?”
The glare he received in reply caused him to shut his mouth. Kallie retrieved her mom, and then they all climbed into his truck. Grant loaded Ainsley into her car seat, then took Kallie’s set of keys back across the parking lot in the direction of Kallie’s pickup. Alone.
He’d thought he’d known how the future would play out. Had tried to make the right decisions. But in the end, nothing was like he’d planned, and he’d lost it all.
So much for starting over as a family.
* * *
After Mom went to bed, Kallie stepped outside. An evening rain had stopped, at least for now, and everything smelled clean with promise. So opposite from the feelings of defeat and betrayal weighing down her heart right now.
Kallie draped an old work sweatshirt across the damp porch step and sat down on it. Ruby rested beside her, her coppery ears and white head resting against Kallie’s arm. Hugging her knees, Kallie scanned the turnaround beneath the flood lamp attached to the barn across the way. Everything was quiet and still.
Suddenly, Ruby sat up, her ears perked. Then Kallie heard the quick padding of dog steps across gravel. Chief and Bella appeared in the circle of lamplight, and Ruby’s tail wagged back and worth, whapping into the bottom step. Obviously on a mission, Grant’s dogs sniffed and explored at quick speed, not stopping too long on any particular spot.
Then footsteps, and Grant strode into the light, holding Dakota’s leash. He hadn’t seen Kallie yet, or at least he kept walking like he hadn’t. When he paused in the middle of the turnaround, probably allowing his dogs the space to look around, Kallie took the moment to observe him. Tall, with square shoulders and trim build. Hands in his jeans pockets beneath a gray hooded sweatshirt. Signature baseball cap pulled low. Looked really good—in some ways, like home. Which was dangerous, because home was something he’d never be.
Ruby couldn’t stand it any longer, so Kallie gave in and used her release word. Ruby cut across the turnaround to join Bella and Chief in their exploration. She ran directly across Grant’s path, only pausing long enough to give Dakota a minor sniff.
Grant spotted her, and Kallie froze. After a couple of seconds, he made his slow way over.
“Taking your dogs out one last time before bed?” she asked, breaking the silence.
“Yep.”
With lamplight behind him, she couldn’t make out his face or what he was feeling. But judging by how the past couple days had gone, chances were he wasn’t feeling the greatest.
Grant shifted. “So, I’m going to move into town. It’ll give your mom a place to live that’s her own. Besides that, I think it’s better this way for you and me.”
The finality of his words chopped like a guillotine. Like she’d suddenly been uprooted and left there to flail. But wasn’t that what she’d expected him to do all along? Wasn’t it what she wanted?
She swallowed her tears. “Fine. And what about your North Dakota job?”
He shrugged. “Told you I’m not leaving the kids, so...”
She huffed, her anger sinking deeper into her heart. Didn’t really answer her question. Did that mean he wasn’t going, or that he was going to seek custody and try to take the kids with him?
Her head hurt. What a mess this whole thing had turned out to be.
“For what, a couple of hours here and there? I thought we agreed it’d be best for you to be on the premises to see them as much as possible.”
“Well, you’re sure making it clear I’m not wanted here, Kal. So which is it?”
* * *
“Thanks for letting me move my work out here for the time being, Maxwell.” Grant surveyed the kennels that were already built and the open space ready for the dogs to run. He’d had to postpone the
dog training another week, but thankfully, his client was still willing and able to bring all three dogs, this time to Maxwell Thornton’s land just outside Bitter Creek. “And how great that your spread was spared from the storm. It’ll be full of birds in time for hunting season.”
“Storms are weird things,” Maxwell said. “I think we were right on the cusp of it. Got our roof a little in town, but nothing damaging out here. Sorry about your place, though. Anything we can do to help?”
Hands in pockets, Grant shuffled a foot, nudging a rock. “Thanks. But we’ll manage.”
It’d been a week since the ER visit and Grant’s move into town. He’d been out to the farm every day to see the kids like he’d promised, and Kallie had always conveniently made herself scarce during that time. Except for this morning, when she was there to tell him that the insurance adjuster had come by. He’d deemed the field only 60 percent ruined—which meant they still needed to see what they could salvage and sell that less-than-awesome wheat.
She’d also told him she was selling off a portion of the land.
Though she’d offered to split the profits, he’d declined. She and the kids needed that money more than he did. Besides, most of what he made was going to go toward Frank’s loans, child support and the kids’ college funds. It would’ve circled around anyway.
“Yeah, getting this place up and running couldn’t have come at a better time,” Maxwell said, crossing his arms. “We just found out my wife is pregnant.”
“That’s great, man.” Grant clapped his friend on the shoulder. “That’s an exciting time, right?”
“Yeah, it is. Well, hey. I’d love to stick around, but speaking of babies, I have to take my wife to our doctor’s appointment. She’s been sick, you know, so I’m gonna drive her.” Maxwell backed up before turning to head for his pickup, parked not too far from the kennels on his land. “See you later, Young.”
“See you.”
Taking your wife to a doctor’s appointment. Driving her because she’s too sick to go alone. Eating frozen pizza in the living room around bottle feeds.
Her Secret Twins Page 16