When I was back at my apartment, I rushed to clean myself up. I didn’t want to waste a whole lot of time because I was going to hang out with my girls and maybe even see my man. When I walked out the back door, Andrea was leaving out the front door, and honestly, I still hadn’t seen Pritchard. I put those two out of my mind, and I ran over to Stephanie’s apartment.
Tanie was already there. Tanie was wearing a short blue jean skirt and a cute red blouse, with black thongs on her feet. She looked cute with her hair freshly done, and the perfume that escaped her was very light and sweet. Stephanie was wearing pink shorts and a regular t-shirt. She looked like she was too tired to dress up. She didn’t look bad, though. Stephanie welcomed us with open arms and smiles, and we all hugged each other like we hadn’t seen each other in years.
We piled in Tanie’s car after talking and laughing in the yard, and we were on our way hopefully to a good time. The one thing on the back of my mind was my hope of seeing Alex. I had plans running through my mind on how I could get him away from his family. I could slip a note into his pocket, or wave him down when no one was looking. I was being crazy right now. He was leaving tonight, and I just wanted one more day.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
Colum had a huge open field close by the Colum High School. There were cars parked in every spot downtown. We ended up parking close by where Andrea worked at the critical care clinic and walked over to the track field. We went passed the sign that had the word ‘welcome’ misspelled, but as we all looked up, we noticed it was corrected. I guess it would be fitting seeing how all kinds of people from Alabama were visiting.
It was a beautiful day outside. The sky was clear, the air was warm, and sometimes a breeze would pass along between us as we walked side by side. We were still talking to one another, laughing like there were no worries in the world. We arrived along with a lot of other people. There were booths and rides. A huge tent set to the immediate right when we entered the field, and there was a stage and many tables and chairs. A bluegrass band played on stage, and the dance floor in front of it had some dancers. A fire truck was on the far side of the field, and all of its compartments and doors were open.
We decided to walk the entire grounds, mostly to see who was there and what kind of booths they had. Some booths were games for prizes like tossing a ball into a jar with holes in the side. Another place had air rifles where you can shoot paper targets and win big prizes like a bike or a video game console. Then there were the education booths where you can find information about different social clubs in the county, fire prevention, and better ways of recycling. And then the rides set in the middle of the field. There were rides that spin around on the ground, a small Ferris wheel, bumper cars and other kinds of rides. Stephanie wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, and Tanie went with her. I didn’t like amusement rides. So, I stayed on solid ground.
I waited out by the exit gate of the Ferris wheel. Personally, I didn’t see a reason for getting on that thing. You weren’t going anywhere. Watching them was kind of boring so I turned to look around looking to see if I knew anyone, and the one person I was really hoping to see was there. Alex and his brother, Josh, were not too far from where I stood. Josh was holding a medium size stuffed elephant, and they were talking to one another. Maybe, Alex would see me from the corner of his eye and make an excuse to get away from his brother. They began disappearing into the ever growing crowd, and I began to follow them. I heard my name call, and I stopped looking back at my friends. I totally forgot about Tanie and Stephanie. I waved at them to come over quickly. I began walking away before they got to me because I had to keep an eye on Alex. There’s no telling where he was headed with so much going on.
Tanie and Stephanie caught up with me, and Tanie asked, “Where are you going? What is the big rush?”
I didn’t answer her. It’s that judgmental thing that Tanie was so famous for that I was trying to avoid. Alex went to the big tent, and the rest of his family was sitting at the front tables, right next to the dance floor. Mr. and Mrs. Westing were wearing comfortable jeans and solid green matching shirts. They were strolling off the dance floor holding hands. Sherrie was sitting at the table with three other people I didn’t recognize. Two of them looked like they were older, middle aged people. She was laughing and having conversations with them. Alex joined his family, and his mother gave him a hug and lovingly touched his face. Josh immediately started bothering Sherrie by playfully putting the elephant in her face. She was aggravated with him and began hitting the elephant every time he put it too close. Alex sat down at the table next to a girl. I couldn’t see her face. Alex sat awfully close, too close for my comfort, and he was whispering in her ear. She flipped her long brown hair, and I caught one good glimpse of her when she turned more to face him. It was the girl that Sherrie brought over the night Alex and I were together.
I was so angry, and they were so close to one another. I wanted to go over there. He was disrespecting me! Tanie noticed what I was looking at, and she chuckled a little.
Stephanie was confused, and she asked, “Angela, why are you mad all of a sudden?”
Tanie blatantly answered, “Because Angela sees her man with another woman.”
Stephanie noted as she looked over at the Westings, “Angela, maybe, he’s only being nice to her. He’s not kissing her or anything like that.”
“I have to get closer.”
“Oh, hell no!” Tanie stopped me and said, “You’re not going over there. He’s with his entire family, Angela.”
She was right. It wouldn’t end well, and Alex probably would be angry with me. I didn’t want him to be angry, but I didn’t like the fact he was sitting close to that girl!
Tanie stepped closer to me and said, “This should be a revelation to you.”
I focused on Tanie. “Excuse me.”
“That’s the truth right there, Angela, right there at that table. He has never taken you out in public in this town, and there he is with another girl, with his family, at a town event where everyone can see.”
I looked over at Alex thinking about what she said. He laughed and put his arms around her. We spent last night together. We made love. Now, the very next day, he was whispering in another girl’s ear and has his arms around her.
Tanie asked, “When are you going to accept he has made his choice?”
I said trying to defend him, “Alex and I are going to be together, Tanie. He loves me.”
“Then why aren’t you sitting next to him instead of her, with his family?”
I was beginning to tear up, but I found the strength to stop those tears. “Alex and I are moving in together. We’re going to Atlanta. He’s just playing the game in front of his family, Tanie, that’s all.”
Tanie shifted backwards and looked at me like I was telling a lie. “When?” She asked.
“In a couple of weeks.”
“I bet his family doesn’t know.”
I lied, “They know what our plans are, Tanie.”
Tanie looked back at Alex and his family and turned towards me. She stated, “You’re moving in together, and the family knows it. But here you stand watching from a distance while he’s hugging on another girl in front of his family. It doesn’t make sense, Angela!”
“Tanie, we have an understanding.” I couldn’t back up the lie. I was feeling disrespected and foolish.
“You’re delusional, Angela!” Tanie yelled at me.
I turned my head and saw Sherrie looking over at us. She had this evil smile on her face. I rushed away. I HATED HER!
Tanie and Stephanie followed me, and I yelled back at Tanie, “Leave me alone, Tanie!”
Tanie grabbed me and turned me around to face her. She said, “We have known each other for a long time, Angela. I may be a pain in the ass, but I am very honest, too. You need to face reality, and the reality is under that tent.”
I had no delusions about how his family felt about me, but I wasn’t going to admit it out loud. I couldn’
t let Tanie know deep down I agreed with her. But still I had hope, and I stood on that hope and believed that Alex was going to come through for me in the end.
“You are so confused right now, Angela. Open your eyes to what’s going on under that tent and accept the truth. You’re not going to Atlanta with him.” Tanie was mad at me. I could see fire in her eyes. She started for the exit out of the fair, and Stephanie and I followed. Stephanie didn’t want to leave, but the fun was over. I stopped before I got out of the grounds, and I watched them walk away. I wanted to be by myself, and I was glad they didn’t notice I was gone.
I started walking towards the educational booths away from the big tent. I was heading towards the lake that hid behind a wall of evergreen trees on the other side of the field. Tanie and Stephanie will not find me. I can give Tanie her breathing room, and maybe, we’ll talk tomorrow. Being best friends with Tanie can be difficult. She feels she has the right to speak her mind and whoever she’s speaking with is supposed to listen and accept what she says. I didn’t want to give her the chance to speak her mind again. She was nowhere near done even though she walked away.
Before I got passed the last table, I heard my name. I didn’t know who was calling for me. She sounded unfamiliar, but when I looked around, I recognized her immediately. Dr. Jasmine Jameson, Andrea’s boss, was smiling at me. She was a really nice lady. She was in her mid-thirties with red hair, freckles, and tiny thin lips. Dr. Jameson was a medium size woman, but her medical coat hid her figure.
“Angela, how are you doing?” Dr. Jameson asked.
I answered trying to sound upbeat, “I’m doing good. How are you, Dr. Jameson?”
“I’m very well, thank you. How is Olivia doing? I heard she graduated from high school.”
“She’s doing fine last I heard. She’s living with her dad, and she’s going to college.”
“That is good news. When you talk to her again, tell her I said congratulations.”
“I sure will.” I was about to leave, but Dr. Jameson wasn’t finished.
She asked, “Angela, where is Andrea? Is she alright?”
“I’m not sure, Dr. Jameson.”
“Well, I’m worried about her. She hasn’t been to work in a few days, and she hasn’t called in, either.”
“You know what she’s dealing with.”
“Yes, I am well aware. I have tried calling her, but she won’t answer the phone. I went by the apartment a couple of times, and she wasn’t home. Can you tell her to call me?”
“Of course, I will, Dr. Jameson.”
“You know, I always worry about Andrea. What she’s doing to herself, it just isn’t good. I’ve tried talking to her. I’ve even brought a counselor over to the clinic.”
“Dr. Jameson, I’m sorry to cut you off, but I really need to get going.” I had no real place to be, but talking about Andrea wasn’t what I wanted to do. “I’m late.”
“Oh, I didn’t mean to hold you up, Angela. You have a good day.”
“I will, and I will tell Andrea to call you. The moment I see her I will tell her.”
“Thank you, Angela.”
When I was finally passed all the booths of the fair, I ran through a tiny patch of grass and out the back gate and into the path of woods that lead to the lake. It didn’t take long to reach the sand. The water was barely moving. Moss and dead grass floated near the shore over black murky water. The bugs and birds flew around and up. I sat in the grass looking beyond the lake. It was very quiet. One thing about nature, it had no opinions about my mistakes. My life had no bearing on whether the water flowed, the birds flew, or the grass grew. Sitting down at the lake made my anger subside, my jealousy disappear, and my worries vanish. This was good for the soul. It was necessary.
Without even realizing it I fell asleep and later, I was awakened by a loud croaking frog. He was by the lake with his back to me. I saw him in the darkness because the moon was high in the sky and reflecting off the water. The stars were winking. I sat up and stretched and started scratching my arms and legs. The grass always made me itch.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
My thoughts seemed crystal clear with the sleep I got and the fresh air around me. I will admit, since I was alone, Alex was not acting in a way that indicated he’s loyal to me. He may say he loves me, but he doesn’t act like it. We made love last night, and then today he was hugging on another girl. The very girl he said he was friends with. He wasn’t coming back. To have me in his life meant lying to his family, and he wasn’t going to risk losing his family’s support. Hannah was the safest and best bet to a more easy life with his folks.
I didn’t want to admit to Tanie she was right. The one thing I had to keep doing was show my belief in Alex. Maybe, one day I will admit to Tanie she was right.
Feeling stiff, I stood and began my walk back towards the field, where the fair was still going. There were still a lot of people walking around. I decided to go home. I went around the fair to leave out the gate and into the parking lot.
Across the parking lot was a familiar face, putting a blanket and plastic grocery bags in the trunk of her car. Last time I spoke with Helen, I was nasty towards her, angry because she was more close to Olivia than I was. Now, I needed to be nice to get a ride home.
“Hi, Helen,” I felt like a heel. I felt my ears burning. I hope she wasn’t going to tell me off, even though I deserved it.
She wasn’t happy to see me. She said, “Hi Angela.”
I asked, “Are you on the way to the fair?”
“No, I’m about to leave actually. I volunteered at the Colum Women Crisis Booth for a couple of hours, and now I’m going home.”
I thought back to the way I treated her the last time. I asked defeated, “Can I get a ride? I don’t have a way home.”
Helen closed the trunk to her car and said, “Sure.”
She didn’t even hesitate. I was shocked she agreed so quickly and said, “Thanks.”
We were on our way in no time. At first, we didn’t say a word. The silence was awkward and heavy.
To my surprise, Helen asked, “What did you think of the fair?”
“It was okay, I guess.”
“Did you hear the speech the Mayor gave about Jason? It was really nice.”
“No.” I answered.
“The Mayor will be dedicating a park bench in memory of Jason. There will be a gold plate with his name attached to one of the cast iron benches in the town park. They also did a moment of silence tonight.”
Was I the only one who just didn’t care about him? Was I the only one that thought he was a nuisance? I had no comment.
Helen dropped me off in front of my apartment, and I was still daydreaming. She said my name to get my attention.
“Thanks for the ride, Helen.” Before I opened the door, a question popped into my head. Helen was a really smart person, a lot of common sense, and she cared a lot about other people. I wanted her advice. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Alright,” She turned off her car, which I didn’t expect her to do. But that revealed to me that she cared about what people had to say. I had no doubts that her sincerity was real.
“Do you think someone like me could...?” All of a sudden I felt stupid asking her about my personal life. “That’s okay, Helen.”
“Angela, say what’s on your mind. It’s okay. You know I’ll listen.”
Okay, I was going to ask it. Put myself out there. “Is it possible for a guy like Alex Westing to truly love someone like me?”
Helen looked out the front window thinking. She knew who Alex was. She worked for his mom. So, she would understand there was more to what I was asking. She would know the deeper meaning without me having to explain. She answered, “Of course, it’s possible.”
“We plan on moving in together in a couple of weeks.” I instantly regretted telling her because she could go back and tell Mrs. Westing.
Helen didn’t look surprised. She smiled and said, “I think that’s gre
at.”
“I saw him with another woman today.”
“Do you trust him?”
I thought for a moment back to this afternoon, to last night, and I answered, “Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. Right now, I don’t.”
“Well, Angela, you have to go with what feels right to you. If you love Alex and you want to be with him, be with him. Almost everything you do is chance, and Alex may be worth it. But you know how his family is. It’s all about color, money, and your status in this town.”
“I am very confused, Helen. This relationship has me upside down.”
“The relationship you have with Alex in its nature is complicated and considering his family, it’s never going to be easy for neither one of you. But if it’s meant to be, love will find a way.”
I smiled and said with sincerity, “Thank you, Helen.”
“You’re welcome, Angela. When are you leaving?”
I had to guard part of my secret. I think I told her too much, anyway. “We haven’t decided yet.”
Helen nodded.
I asked her out of curiosity, “How does his family treat you? Are they nice to you?”
“Mrs. Westing is a very nice lady. I really like working for her. I hardly ever see Mr. Westing, but when I do see him, he’s cordial. He asks how my family is doing. Sherrie and I don’t speak. It works out well that way. Josh is nice. He always speaks when he comes by the office. Alex is a flirt. He always gives compliments. Their family for the most part is nice to me, but I’m not personal with any of them.”
“Does Alex seem like a decent person to you? Do you think he’ll hurt me?”
“I can’t really say how he is, Angela. Any guy is capable of hurting you in a relationship.”
I said, “Helen, I’m sorry about the last time we spoke. I wasn’t very nice to you, and I apologize for that.”
Helen smiled and said, “I accept your apology, Angela.”
“Thanks for the ride home.” I got out of the car.
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