I looked down for the charger. “Oh for fuck’s sake.”
I could never keep up with phone chargers while traveling all the time and I’d taken the one from my car up to my office the day before.
It’s just a few hours’ drive. She’ll understand when I explain it to her.
—
I pulled into the parking garage and sprint-walked with my phone toward my office to plug it in. Excitement still pounded in my veins at the thought we were going to get a number one draft pick, from Texas nonetheless. When I walked through the doors and into the office, something was off.
Everyone kept walking by with their heads down, avoiding eye contact. This was the norm a few months ago, pre Jenny Jackson, but times had changed. Once Jenny came along, my whole world was turned upside down.
I started toward Todd and he glanced to his watch and scurried off. What in the hell?
Jill walked by and I grabbed her lightly by the arm. She trembled like a clown had snatched her leg from under her bed.
“Hey, what’s going on?”
“W-what do you mean, Mr. Mason?”
I took a step back and examined her features. She made an attempt to look normal, but failed miserably. I would’ve thought it was from the day I reamed her in front of everyone, but I’d apologized and tried to make her more comfortable around me since. It seemed like it’d been working.
“Something isn’t right around here. Have you talked to Jenny?”
Her head shot the other direction in a flash. My heart pounded and worry flooded my body. The saliva in the back of my throat turned thick and salty. “What is it?”
“N-nothing—”
“What is it?” My voice boomed through the office and everyone cowered a little.
Jill looked on the verge of bursting into tears. I ran a hand up through my hair.
“I’m really sorry. Please, Jill. Just tell me what happened.”
“H-her dad. H-he passed earlier.”
My hands dropped to my sides and I stood there, looking at Jill but not really looking at her. Brian was just fine. He had scans done and everything looked good. Jenny had been upbeat on the phone when I left the city early this morning. This couldn’t be true. Jill was lying. She had to be.
I stumbled a few steps backward.
“I’m s-sorry, Mr. Mason. We knew he’d been sick but didn’t know how serious it was.”
My lower back rammed into a cubicle wall and jolted me from the initial shock. I scanned the room like a panorama, from one side to the other, and then bolted in a dead sprint for my car.
A cold sweat broke out on my forehead and it felt like my collar and tie were strangling me to death. I jumped in the car and pounded the gas, heading straight for her dad’s house.
—
When I fishtailed around the corner of her dad’s street my tires squealed on the pavement. The house looked normal; it was just Jenny’s and Kelsey’s cars in the driveway. I prepared myself for the worst. He was just fine. He was doing better. How did this happen?
I hammered the gas and skidded to a halt alongside the curb in front of his house. A small gap in the window blinds closed.
I opened the door and hauled ass for the front porch, leaping up the steps in one stride. Taking a deep breath, I knocked on the door. I knew Jenny would be broken and upset, and most likely take it out on the fact that I wasn’t there. If she needed a punching bag, I would be one for her. I’d be anything she needed me to be.
Kelsey stepped out and she closed the door behind her. Her eyes were pink and puffy, and she looked drained. All of her spunk and charisma were somewhere else entirely. Why did she step out and close the door?
It shocked me for a second. “Can I come in?”
Kelsey stared at the ground, refusing to look at me. “She doesn’t want to see you right now.”
If I thought I couldn’t have felt any worse than I already did, I was wrong. I looked up and tried to hold it together. “W-what? I mean—” I reached up and yanked the hair on the back of my head. “My phone died. I was in the middle of nowhere.”
Kelsey shook her head. “She—she’s just in a bad place right now. And you weren’t here.”
I tried not to make it about me. I wanted Jenny comforted, and whatever would make that happen was what I would do. But fuck—this wasn’t my fault. Was it? It was just a bad circumstance. I should’ve stayed. “I-I’d really like to see her. B-but I don’t want to m-make things worse.”
I hadn’t stuttered since the day my mom left Dad and me.
“Just give her a little time.”
I wanted to barrel through the door and wrap her up in my arms. It took everything I had to stop myself. Acting without thinking had always gotten me in trouble with Jenny. She was already crushed. This wasn’t about me. It was about what was best for her and what she wanted. If she needed space I had to give it to her, because the last thing I wanted to do was make this any harder on her. “O-okay, I mean, sure. I t-trust you. Whatever you th-think’s best.”
Kelsey turned and I stopped her with a light hand on her shoulder. She looked back at me.
I took in a deep breath, trying to make my words clear. “P-p—” I stopped myself and blinked a couple of tears away, trying to get control of my voice. “Please take care of her and let her know that I love her.”
Kelsey covered her mouth and nodded before going back inside and closing the door.
I told myself over and over as I pulled out of the driveway that it would be okay. That she was just hurt about her father, and the circumstances were just unfortunate. She’d told me to go to the meeting. My phone died. Those types of things happened sometimes.
Nothing could stop the hurt though. The pain I felt in every cell of my body, that she was suffering and I couldn’t be there for her. Leaving that porch was the hardest thing I’d ever done in my life.
Chapter 31
Jenny Jackson
When Dad died, and Ethan wasn’t there—something inside of me broke. Nothing was right with me. It was like I’d lost a limb, or a bone was out of place. He should’ve been there. Yeah, I’d told him to go on the trip because he’d been out of the office so much, but how could he let his cellphone die when he knew the condition my father was in?
Four days had passed, and we’d buried Dad yesterday. Ethan didn’t come to the funeral, but I’d noticed a large floral arrangement he’d sent. I must’ve traced my finger over his name a thousand times on the card and thought about how hurt he must’ve been that I’d shut him out like I did. The whole day was like living my worst nightmare, only in the flesh.
I said goodbye to the man who raised me, took care of me, taught me about life, and shared baseball with me. You try to prepare yourself for something like that, especially with the types of warnings I had, but at the end of the day nothing can keep you from breaking. And the man I loved wasn’t at my side, holding my hand or providing a shoulder for me to cry on.
Ethan called twice and texted once. He’d left messages saying how sorry he was for my loss and if there was anything that I needed to please let him know. I could practically hear his voice trying not to crack on the voicemails. It was obvious from his tone that he was restraining himself and it crushed my heart that much more, knowing what I was doing to him.
I admired the way he’d held back, if I was being honest with myself. He hadn’t forced me to hear his explanation. He was doing what he thought I wanted or what I thought I needed. It killed me on the inside.
Truth be told, I’d wanted him there, even after the cellphone debacle. I wanted his arms wrapped around me, and I’d wanted to lean on him. For some reason—inexplicable to me—my mind just wouldn’t accept it. My body wouldn’t call him, wouldn’t apologize, wouldn’t be anything more than angry at him. Yes, I was being totally unreasonable but for some reason I couldn’t stop myself. It was like an out-of-body experience.
I was upset about everything and took it out on him. He got all of it, the full b
runt. Now, it was too late to change anything. I was punishing myself and in return it was punishing him. Yet every time I scrolled down to his name on the phone I could not physically push the button.
Kelsey stroked my hair on the couch while I curled up in the fetal position with a pillow. Dad’s death had hit her like nothing I’d ever seen. She didn’t do feelings much, and she tried to hold it together for me and hide the pain. But it was evident. After four days, she was just starting to look like her old self.
Three sharp knocks on the door had us both sitting up on the couch, staring at each other.
“I’ll get it.” Kelsey walked over and opened the door.
I couldn’t see who it was, but Kelsey had a hip cocked sideways with a hand on it. It was her tell that a cute guy was standing there. She’d never pull that move with Ethan. What the hell?
“I need to talk to her.” Matt’s voice was loud and insistent.
I shrunk back into the couch and shook my head, but Kelsey wouldn’t look over at me. She blushed and grinned before stepping out of the way.
Matt’s large, muscular frame came through the doorway. Kelsey shrugged behind him where he couldn’t see and mouthed sorry at me.
“Traitor.” I tried to glare at her, but it turned into a slight grin.
Matt held his hands up. Why did those two boys always do that? It’s like they knew they were walking into danger, and that somehow exempted them from attack. “I was really sorry to hear about your dad.”
I gripped the pillow closer to my chest. “Why are you here?”
He sat down next to me on the couch while Kelsey continued to ogle him from across the room. Bitch.
“You know why I’m here, Jenny.” He placed his big bear paw of a hand on my shoulder. “You need to talk to him.”
“I can’t. He wasn’t here when I needed him.”
Matt sighed and leaned back into the couch. “He couldn’t have known this would happen. His phone died while he was out of cell range on business. The second he heard—” Matt paused and sighed. “He freaked and hauled ass to your dad’s house.”
“It doesn’t matter. Business always comes first with him.” It was completely untrue. Ethan had changed, but I still couldn’t stop it from escaping my lips. I continued to lie to myself, fully aware of how ridiculous I must’ve sounded to everyone. “Always has, and it always will.”
Matt grinned. “That’s not true and you know it.”
“When he gets tired of me he’ll go back to what’s comfortable.”
“You’re close to him. You love him. But you don’t know everything about him yet.”
I glanced up at Matt, unbelieving that anything he said would be able to get me to change my mind. “Oh really? What do I not know?”
His smile grew larger. “Okay. No problem. Did someone pay all your dad’s hospital bills?”
I bolted upright. “A charity.” My words were pointed. I’d researched that charity thoroughly to make sure it didn’t lead back to Ethan.
Matt shook his head. “It all came from Ethan. Every dime.”
I sighed. “So he was trying to buy my affection? Nice.” I was such an asshole.
“If he was doing that, why wouldn’t he just tell you?”
He had a point, but I shook my head, still not convinced.
“And he wasn’t trying to buy your affection. He put it into action the second he found out you were struggling. Before anything had gotten serious between you two. Before he’d ever even met your dad.”
“We were attracted to each other the first day we met. If he did that, it was just because it was part of some big game. It’s who he is.”
Matt laughed. “Why don’t you ask your coworker Jill if that’s true then. Is Ethan trying to get in her pants too?”
I shot him a glare. “What?”
“Her kid is eight and had three open heart surgeries before she was hired at M and A. He did the same thing for her. A hundred and twenty-five thousand dollars’ worth of debt from the surgeries—gone. She has no idea it was him.”
“You’re trying to cover for him.” I shook my head, still refusing to believe it, even though I knew it was most likely true.
Matt stared at me like I was being silly. “Ethan at the office—Suit Ethan—that’s the act. That’s not him. Look in my eyes and tell me I’m wrong.”
I gazed up and could see the conviction of Matt’s words. I finally broke and my body gave in. I reached over and wrapped my arms around his broad shoulders. I sobbed into his chest. “I’m sorry, okay. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m like this.”
He patted my hair. “Because your father died and you’re angry. We all understand. It hurts.”
“I told him to go. Told him I was fine. That everything was okay.” My tears soaked into Matt’s shirt.
“I know. He knows.”
I pushed away from him and wiped the tears from my eyes with my forearm. “Where is he?”
Matt and Kelsey both grinned wide enough to show some teeth. “At his house. He’s a fucking mess. You’ve been warned.”
I rose from the couch. “Take me.”
“Thought you’d never ask.”
Chapter 32
Ethan Mason
I’d finally pulled myself from the couch, willing myself to shower so I didn’t smell like a hobo. I plodded up the stairs, my legs heavy like they were full of lead. Each step took a Herculean effort.
Once in the bathroom, I stripped down to my boxers and started the water. The shower began to fog up the window as I stared at myself in the mirror. How was I going to get over her? I’d never felt this way in my life.
The drops of water beat on the tile in a steady rhythm and I placed a palm on each side of the sink, pressing them against the granite countertop. I raised my head to look at myself once more. She’s coming back, right?
I glared a second longer, the heat building in the room and deep inside of my stomach. I heard a faint sound, like someone was knocking at the door. I was convinced it was wishful thinking. Nobody was coming to see me. I was just hearing things.
The steam lingered near the ceiling and I shoved myself up from the counter, breathing in the thick, humid air.
Reaching down, I started to take my boxers off when a shrill scream cut into my ears. It was followed by a female’s laughter. More laughter from others followed.
What the fuck?
I bolted through the bathroom and nearly busted my ass on the slick tile. Shit, that was close!
I righted myself and ran as fast as I could through the bedroom and out to the balcony that overlooked my front yard. When I got to the railing I looked over the edge.
There she was—Jenny—laughing her ass off hysterically. She was flat on her back in the middle of the shrubs underneath my balcony. Matt and Kelsey were a few feet away, laughing and talking to her.
“Are you okay?” I tried not to chuckle. “What are you doing?”
“I tried to climb your damn balcony because you wouldn’t answer the freaking door! Now, here we are, it seems.” She moved her arms and legs back and forth like she was making a snow angel in the bush.
The leaves rustled each time she moved.
“Why didn’t you ring the doorbell?” I couldn’t stop the laugh from building.
“Why don’t you trim your fucking bush?” Her hand shot over her mouth when the pun sank in.
I died laughing along with Kelsey and Matt.
“Jesus. Are you going to come fucking kiss me or not?”
I shoved off the railing of the balcony and flew down the stairs in nothing but my underwear. I couldn’t get to her fast enough. Hauling ass down the stairs, my momentum got the best of me and I rammed shoulder first into the door. It didn’t matter. Didn’t feel it. I needed her lips on mine like I needed air in my lungs. Nothing was going to keep me from her again.
I ripped the door open and flew around the side of my house to the bushes.
“I told her it was a bad idea.” Kel
sey shook her head and laughed alongside Matt.
When I got to Jenny she was like a fly tangled in a spiderweb, trying to fight her way out.
I scooped her up under her neck and the backs of her knees. She wrapped her arms around my neck and her touch set in motion explosions of tingles that rushed through me like a wild current of electricity.
Setting her on her feet, I clutched her face in my palms and pressed my lips to hers.
“Mmm.” She purred against my mouth and my eyes closed tight. Every sense of her touch magnified by a thousand.
I snaked my hands through her hair—grass, leaves, and all, but my mouth wasn’t coming off hers any sooner than necessary.
Kelsey’s squeal caused me to open my eyes for a brief second to see her hand covering her mouth.
Jenny finally pulled back and stared at me. “Sorry, she squees a lot.”
“Do fucking not!” Kelsey shot back with a hateful grin.
I pressed my forehead against Jenny’s. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” She paused. “I’m s—”
“Don’t.” I put a finger to her lips. “I’m here. You’re here. That’s all that matters.”
Chapter 33
Jenny Jackson
It was the last game of the regular season. If we won, it clinched the division. Ethan, Kelsey, and I sat in the front row, a few feet down from the home dugout. It’d been a few weeks since my dad had died, and I’d seen some shy smiles exchanged between Kelsey and Matt.
It was funny really. They seemed so opposite of each other, and she denied it anytime I mentioned anything. He’s fucking hot, but so not my type, was all she would say.
Matt came up to bat in the bottom of the ninth with runners in scoring position and we screamed for him. Ethan squeezed my thigh. “He needs a hit right here. His contract is up.”
I stared back at him like he was an idiot.
“Sorry, you already knew that. I forget who I’m dating sometimes.”
I patted him on the top of his hand. “It’s okay. You’ll get used to your other half knowing more than you.”
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