by Jean Klein
The society we live in is full of suffering. I find it difficult to resign myself to this fact.
From your viewpoint, you cannot possibly accept this. As I have often said, you cannot experience pleasure without also experiencing suffering; you cannot have one without the other. You feel sorry for the sufferings of society but don’t realize that you are the cause of the suffering. So begin by feeling sorry for yourself!
How can we possible accept ourselves entirely?
Refusal to accept implies defense and aggression: you isolate yourself, cut yourself off from your environment-it is as if you had cut the vital thread of life. Acceptance is our inherent state, non-acceptance is artificial, fabricated. We do not need to force ourselves to accept, simply recognize this fact. If you see this non-acceptance clearly at different moments of the day, you will be outside the process. The energies thus fixated in non-acceptance or dispersed in various methods of escape will return to their source. Once you live in your natural state of observing, your acts will no longer leave any trace within you. You will know when the situation has been totally accepted, fully experienced because you feel entirely free from it. It appears within your freedom.
Where does this fear that so often invades me come from?
Fear comes from memory. It is an object. It only appears in relation to certain situations, certain experiences. It has no more a reality than the ego. You cannot think in terms of “I” without thinking of the situation to which it refers. It is inherent that the human condition try to locate itself somewhere, in a bodily sensation or a thought. But there are moments in life when we ask: do I have any existence beyond this relation to objects or can I possibly know myself in any other way? If we let things flow freely, we will discover ourselves to be observation. Knowing oneself is not limited by a subject/object relationship, by an observer/observed pattern, it is a state of joy, of peace, bliss, constant security.
You said that true understanding brings an attitude of total acceptance. I am 35 and am dying of Aids. How can I face up to this seemingly unacceptable fact?
When you say it is not acceptable see in one moment what you mean by “not acceptable.”
Not just unacceptable for me but also for my family.
See the illness objectively, as if in front of you so that you are not lost in it. Look at your body as if it belonged to another. Then you will have a glimpse of freedom from the burden of it, a moment of psychological space. Become interested in this feeling of freedom, and it will be effortlessly sustained. It is only from this free perspective that you can act most correctly. You are not the body, neither the healthy nor the unhealthy body. So your illness is a gift to come more quickly to realize what you are not. This attitude, which is not an attitude because it comes from wholeness, from Life, will stimulate your surroundings, your family and friends. It will stimulate the Life in them. Knowingly or unknowingly they will share Life with you and neither you nor they will feel isolated. This feeling of Life will remain after the disappearance of what you are not, the physical body. Life is eternal and in it all are in oneness.
There is no illness. Illness is nothing but an accident. In reality there is only health. The very word, the idea of illness already predisposes you to being ill, creates it even. As soon as we classify our sensations into categories so as to name them, our imagination, charged with emotivity, already very vivid in this field, feeds what we could call a malfunction.
You should never name this malfunction, for this only feeds the imagination and confirms your illness. This in itself prolongs the malfunction. In my view, malfunction is a signpost.
The best way to bring a malfunction to an end on either the physical or psychological plane is not to refuse the sensation, the perception. You must accept it but this does not mean accepting it morally or psychologically both of which are a kind of fatalism. Accept it totally, actively. Acceptance is lucid, watchful awareness in which all the facts are seen. It is this acceptance of the facts of the situation that brings about the cure. When you live in accepting, illness no longer has any substance, and you have then the greatest possible chance of getting better. Non-acceptance prevents all possibility of a cure being brought about.
So, the first thing a doctor must do is instill in the patient the correct attitude so that he can live with himself. Clear seeing of all the elements of the situation comes when there is no involvement in the perception, when it is seen objectively. This uninvolvement is the first step towards freeing ourselves. It is only when all the facts have been seen that creative action occurs.
You said that acceptance brings about the cure but you also give suggestions for things to do to help healing. Would you say that only when we accept can we really know what needs to be done?
In acceptance intelligence and right action appear. Acceptance liberates all potential.
Is illness often psychological?
Yes, often. I would say as long as we continue to believe the person exists, we will encounter psychological problems which produce physical reactions. The person shuts itself in a stronghold of aggression and self-defense. This structure is nothing but fear, desire and anxiety. It is an intricate barrier to the natural flow of life within us. This natural flow of life can take care of itself perfectly well, it does not need the person.
Illness, malfunction, result from this opposition.
Does the body heal itself?
A cell became a cell through health. If the cell had no memory of this state of health, it could not cure itself. It knows itself when healthy and there is no need to intervene.
One must help the cell to recuperate. The first step is acceptance of the actual state of the cell, the body. Acceptance means objectifying the sensation, not trying to escape it, dominate it or suppress it. In this total acceptance the body regains its health for it already knows health.
How can I go beyond the depressed states I sometimes feel?
Let us take a few examples. Imagine sitting quietly without any particular aim, secure and with a contented feeling, free from any particular desire to be or do anything. You neither look back over things, nor criticize; you contemplate yourself and find yourself likeable, you are completely absorbed in presence even when there is a bodily absence.
Let us take another example. Through one-pointed concentration, we create a void, an impression of emptiness, but this is still an observer/observed relationship. Someone who is not directly oriented towards the ultimate non-relationship would remain in this state, which in the end only results in a hollow feeling of lack. When, on the contrary, we know that we can never find what we are seeking in an object, no matter how subtle, then our attention shifts from the state to the observation itself, the absolute, global emptiness within which blissful plenitude now awakens.
Does the object exist before we think of it?
That is a purely hypothetical question, an intellectual question. The object appears in you and disappears in you. It is because you are. It is created the moment you think of it.
How does the Self awaken within us?
It is always awake, it is we who are asleep. We are awake in objects but not in the Self.
Reality hides behind its own creation, behind the energy it sends forth. It reveals itself by its own grace; it cannot possibly be attained by action, man appears within this absolute, this awareness that we experience spontaneously without there being a reason. There is only resplendent oneness.
What difference do you see between awareness that is not oriented towards the absolute and which only faces objects and the awareness that points directly to the ultimate subject?
Someone who is not oriented easily loses himself in all sorts of distractions and activities which result from the desire to accumulate, to own things, in the belief that existence consists in doing things, in becoming. The orientated person ignores his ego and when it is no longer paid attention, it dies.
When you are attentive to something you are fixed on the objec
t but when you are simply in attention you are free from all grasping. There is a deep relaxation which comes from the ultimate itself and in which all your being unfolds effortlessly and joyfully. Here the Self refers to itself.
If I have understood you correctly, there exist consciousness of objects, what Atmananda Krishna Menon called functional consciousness, and pure consciousness. I don’t understand how there can be two types of consciousness in oneness.
In modern psychology, consciousness is always focused on an object. We claim we are conscious of a thing, so that the interval between two perceptions is considered to be a nothingness and deep sleep is also considered to be a nothingness.
Here, on the contrary, when we talk of consciousness, we know that between two perceptions we are totally present to our true nature; likewise deep sleep is free from all intentional activity and we are being, pure consciousness beyond time and space. Don’t try to understand this intellectually; thinking about it is absolutely useless for there is nothing to be found. You can only live this pure presence, which is always. Pure consciousness expresses itself in functional consciousness which can be said to be already in view to perceive. Openness to itself is pure consciousness, openness to objects is functional consciousness. But these are not two, they are the same.
So if pure consciousness is without objects is this not an abstraction?
It is an abstraction as long as you do not live it. The timeless presence, the background behind and between perceptions, thoughts, is pure consciousness. Thinking, perceiving is functional consciousness. Pure consciousness is continuous, its functioning is discontinuous.
It would seem then that one needs a body and a mind for functional consciousness, that it is born and dies, but pure consciousness is before we are born and never dies?
Yes.
So functional consciousness is the tool by which pure consciousness becomes known?
It is through the known that the unknown reveals itself. But there are not two. The ultimate expresses itself in space and time and dies back in itself. The divine enjoys its own expression. It is the divine play without purpose.
Yes, when I see a child playing I never question it. Why analyze the divine play?
It’s only the mind that asks questions!
What we call the Self is not a soul-like thing, a state, it is the uninterrupted flow of life. We cannot apprehend it with the faculties we use every day such as impressions, feelings or memory, which belong to the fractional, objective point of view. We cannot think it because we are it. In the silence that is beatitude, directed energies such as concepts of time, space and the individual memory leave no trace. Things are lost in consciousness but consciousness is not lost in them. Thus activities go on and we remain firmly established in our true being.
This living joy accompanies each of its expressions. As I said earlier functional consciousness is a prolongation of and one with pure consciousness. The average human being is only capable of perceiving the coarsely apparent side of things, for he is completely dominated by the relative subjective aspect of his experience. Joy obtained by this means is but a fragile interval between two moments of suffering. A headache or a disappointment easily cause it to disappear. True joy is not linked to outside circumstances, it flows directly from the Self. You will be convinced of this if you become aware of these moments of calm experienced before fear and desire take hold.
In what way can yoga help us?
We practice yoga in the hope of realizing our deep desire for fulfilment. It is a science, or rather an art, that helps us to free ourselves from what we mistakenly believe ourselves to be. The basis of all yoga is attention, listening, silent observation, seeing and hearing without being lost in what is seen, what is heard. In the mirror of your mind things appear and disappear. Be alert, see this without becoming implicated, then you will discover yourself in this permanent observation and you will find peace and security.
The ultimate end—if there is one—is to free yourself from this identification with the person. Hitherto you have always surrounded yourself with imagined limitations, you have imposed images on yourself. This conditioning is the root of all mistakes and brings suffering to you and to others. Sooner or later, your physical and psychological resources will be exhausted. Reduced to despair, the question “Who am I” will arise within you, and you will at long last find the answer. A living answer.
I yearn for a life free from upheaval, to be free of this constant swinging back and forth between pleasure and suffering. Is there a state of permanent plenitude free from all strife?
You are what is permanent, you cannot leave it, even for a minute. You can find yourself free from thought but you can never cease being what you are fundamentally. Things that incessantly change can never lead you towards what you are essentially: unchangeable and encompassing all change. Changes only belong to the mind. What do you expect to achieve through them? No effort can lead you to this ultimate harmony, every attempt leads you further away. Only discernment gives rise to the awakening of this understanding.
How can I convince myself of the uselessnes of all effort?
As long as you think you can achieve freedom by thinking, all your acts will be motivated by fear, anxiety or desire. There is no end to things, your problems and suffering will continue to accumulate. In the thought-action process, acts motivated by fear will only bring you back to your starting point, thus enclosing you within a vicious circle. See the futility of wanting to modify, to change or “get out of it.” Seeing, no longer influenced by the past or the projected future, is global vision.
You must leave behind you the idea of improving. There is nothing to be found, nothing to achieve. Searching and wanting to achieve something are the fuel for the entity you believe yourself to be. Don’t project an idea of reality, of freedom. Be simply aware of the facts of your existence without wanting change. Seeing things in this way will bring you a state of deep relaxation both physical and psychological. Even this state becomes an object of perception and dissolves in your observation where there is no longer observer or state observed.
Are you conscious during the deep sleep state?
The question shows a fundamental misunderstanding. Consciousness is not found in any state. Deep sleep is found in consciousness. Deep sleep is closer to your natural non-state than the waking or dreaming states because it is without ego, not in the subject/object relation. The experience of deep sleep is a profound reminder of our being. This reminder is still an organic memory because all our physical structure is struck by the peace of living in non-volition. This reminder of presence invites us to inquire, to meditate.
So the invitation from the deep sleep state leaves us longing for non-dual living in all the states?
Yes. It is only in the waking state that we can face our dual existence but we can also come to the insight of non-duality during the dreaming state.
But does this insight last?
We can be deeply struck so that it leaves its effect in us, but the strongest insights come in the states before waking or in the waking state.
But what is this insight you are talking about?
It is an instantaneous apperception that your total being is always present, always in the “now.” As our psychosomatic structure is affected by the insight we qualify it as peace, joy, plenitude, but these are symbols, pointers to describe an experience which is lived beyond description. An “apple” is not an apple!
How can I master my imagination? In other words how can I govern my mind?
This mind is an extension of our being, therefore it can only function harmoniously when illuminated by it. All forms of control submit us to memory. A controlled mind can never act freely, nor spontaneously. Of course we can say that memory, experience, is the best of all tools in the relative world, but it is insufficient for knowing what is beyond it, for it functions within the framework of the already known. The unknown is the closest to us, too near to be perceived.
It is closer than picking a flower as the Upanishads say.
By clear-sighted awareness of cause and effect, another view of things, a new dimension of life, will be opened to you.
How can I come to a deeper quest so that I can convince myself that “I Am”?
The conviction comes from the “I am.” There is an original desire in you to be yourself knowingly. This desire is fed all your life by deep sleep and moments of utter tranquility. The desire to be never leaves you, so welcome it and follow it as you would follow a mountain stream to its source. You would never try to change the course of the stream or in any way interfere with it. You remain only its companion. So be the close companion of your deepest longing. It will inevitably bring you to your heart’s desire.
Ultimate desire is living without desire, where there is no longer any room for the idea of being somebody. Let this become clear within you. Be completely earnest. Live it with all your heart. Be intimately familiar with the certainty that absolutely nothing perceived can possibly guarantee bliss.
How can we destroy this illusion that makes us believe we are the person?
You will recognize this illusion through investigation. Everything you take to be personal, everything the I creates or repeats, is false. Liberation consists in being free from the me. Understanding this is instantaneous, total, without return. It is a sudden opening to a new dimension which leaves us in silent plenitude where there is no one who claims and no one who suffers.
When I find myself before you, I am in a state of wonder. I can no longer feel or formulate all the questions that seemed vital to me a moment ago.
When one is struck by wonder or astonishment there is perfect nonduality between the knower and the thing known. It is living reality. Let yourself be totally absorbed by it, then thought and action will derive directly from this wonderment which is the background, your natural state.