G is for...

by L. DuBois

  Given her current state of arousal, she probably wouldn’t have minded the dental gag. That was what happened after a sub was kept on edge for nearly two hours. He’d been playing with and exploring her since their soul-altering sex this afternoon, but two hours ago he’d stopped letting her come, always stopping short. When his own desire had been too much, he’d fucked her mouth while using a remote controlled plug on her ass. When she’d begged him to fuck her ass after he’d finished coming in her mouth, he’d denied her, and then applied a bit of cooling-sensation lotion to her labia and bound her to the bed. He’d leaned against the wall and had a beer while watching her thrash and curse at him.

  Twenty minutes ago he’d left her tied to the spanking bench in their room, and gone to set up the scene for the last item on their checklist.

  Gang bang.

  He’d recruited a few other Doms, including a guy who’d been awkwardly staring at the blond Master Khan was currently playing with. It made more sense when the man introduced himself as Master Bland. An unfortunate name for a rather bland-looking man with short dark hair and glasses.

  He’d set up a space in the courtyard of the Iron Court, among the imposing statuary. There were chairs in a circle around a tall, backless stool. The stool was padded on top, and large enough that Sejal could sit on it, or lay on it, though if she lay on her back she’d need additional support under her shoulders.

  Once that was done, he’d brought her out. The last thing to do was to add the gag. Now that it was done, she was ready.

  Cort touched her under her chin. “Stand up. It’s time for your gang bang.”

  Desire mixed with trepidation in the depths of her eyes, but she rose. He led her over to the stool and helped her hop up onto it.

  She spread her legs without being ordered to, then planted the heels of her hands on the stool behind her and leaned back. Her pussy was glossy with arousal and the torches that lit the courtyard painted her skin with gold and red tones. Cort pushed his pants down to his thighs, hooked his arms under her knees, and started to fuck her.

  She came on that first thrust. Her head tipped back and a wailing cry of pleasure echoed through the courtyard. Though he’d only recruited a few other Doms, the crowd around them was growing. That cry would bring more people.

  Good. He wanted her to feel wanted and desired. Wanted her to ache for days as a result of the rough, gang-bang fucking she was about to get. And he wanted to be the one to take care of her when it was over.

  Rather than fuck her until he came, Cort kept fucking her until her own orgasm was over. Then he pulled out. She wobbled and nearly toppled off the stool. He pulled her off, turned her around, and then pushed her face down over the stool.

  “Stand on the rung,” he ordered, “and hold on to the legs.”

  She obeyed, stepping onto the lower of the two cross pieces. This raised her hips high enough to make her pussy clearly visible, and put her at a good height for fucking. “Stay in that position,” he ordered.

  Master Bland looked at him, and when Cort nodded, he took a step forward. The brown-haired man scanned the crowd, gaze stopping when it landed on Master Khan and his harem.

  Master Bland touched Sejal’s lower back, then ran his hand down over her ass. Sejal, whose head had been hanging, looked up.

  She scanned the crowd, and stiffened.

  Something was wrong.

  Master Bland pushed his pants down just enough to free his cock. The crowd started to good-naturedly cheer him on. They pressed in as more people came. Someone stepped in front of Cort, and for a moment he lost sight of her.

  He heard it, a small sound of distress, barely audible over the discussions of those around him. Cort shoved the dumbass who’d stepped in front of him to the side.

  Hach had walked out of the crowd. He was naked except for the harness he still wore. His cock was erect, and he held Sejal’s head in his hands.

  She turned her head, as if trying to shake Hach’s hold, her gaze frantically scanning the crowd. Cort stepped into her line of sight, his heartbeat thundering.

  All it took was one look at her face and he knew the feeling he’d gotten a moment ago was right. This was wrong, all wrong.

  Cort took two long steps, planted a hand each on Master Bland and Hachiro’s chests, and shoved them back.

  Sejal scrambled off the stool and threw herself at him. He wrapped his arms around her.

  “Sejal,” Hachiro barked. “You have to submit.”

  She twitched against him and Cort turned on him, a cold smile curving his lips, showing his teeth.

  “Don’t talk to my submissive that way.”

  “Your submissive for now.”

  “No.” Cort smiled. “Mine. You gave her away, permanently.”

  Hachiro looked shocked. “No. I would not do that.”

  “That you wouldn’t do? But you’re fine giving her away for the weekend.” Cort was aware of their audience, hanging on every word, but didn’t care. Sejal made a distressed noise and Cort undid the gag, pulling it from her mouth. “You’re fine using her for your own pleasure, using her to play at being submissive without actually having to submit. Fuck you, dude.”

  “I did not—” Hach protested

  “We’re not a good fit any more,” Sejal said quietly.

  Hach looked at her, the skin around his eyes tightening. He nodded once. Cort wondered if he knew exactly how much he’d just lost, how amazing and special Sejal was.

  “Enough.” Master Khan stepped up and snapped a crop against Hachiro’s chest, then gently cropped his erect cock. “Master Dowell isn’t wrong. You like the kink, but not obeying. We’ll work on it.” Master Khan looked at Master Bland. “I feel bad you were denied.” He gestured to Sejal. “You can chose one of the women in my harem to have for a scene. No vaginal intercourse—anal or oral only.”

  Master Bland avoided looking at the blond. “If Luscious is willing…”

  Luscious stepped up, running a hand over Master Khan’s arm, and then sank to her knees in front of Master Bland. “How may I serve you, Sir?”

  “You didn’t pick me?” The words came from the blond, who looked shocked.

  “Come on,” Cort whispered to Sejal. He kept his arm around her and pulled her into the crowd, which was now focused on whatever was going on between Master Bland and the blond, whom Cort was guessing was his sub, or at least had been until the damned game made her part of Khan’s harem.

  He could have picked her up and carried her, but he didn’t want to draw attention to them, so he led her out of the knot of onlookers. It was fewer than a dozen steps to their playroom, and in under a minute he had her safely inside.

  “Sejal?”

  She fought against the tears, but in the end she lost the battle. “You were going to give me away.”

  “No, sweetheart, never. I would never.”

  “You were. You left. Everyone leaves. Or they send me away. Why aren’t I enough?”

  She’d only meant to say that she’d panicked when she hadn’t been able to see him. That the idea of a gang bang, which had seemed so sexy when she’d been high with arousal, had seemed horrific the second after he’d made her come. When he’d ordered her to hold her position that had been enough to temporarily calm her feelings, to let her access her submissive side enough that she’d been able to enjoy the touch of the man who’d walked up behind her.

  Then Hach had appeared out of the crowd, and the sight of his naked body, so familiar and yet so foreign, had brought emotions swirling to the surface. She’d looked for Cort, needing reassurance, and again hadn’t been able to see him.

  Her Master pulled her against his chest as she wept.

  “Let it out, sweetheart. Just let it out. We’re done with this fucking game. It’s just you and me. So let it out. Let it all out.”

  She cried then, cried in a way she hadn’t in years. Since meeting him, she’d dealt with more of her issues than she had in therapy.

  Maybe he should be
a sex therapist. He could top women until they dealt with their issues.

  That thought broke through her sadness and her tears slowed and finally stopped. He was sitting on the floor with his back to the wall, with her cradled on his lap. She’d somehow gotten used to having him lift her, hold her, and hadn’t even noticed when he’d moved.

  “How are you doing?”

  “I’m okay now,” she said.

  “Can you look at me?”

  She leaned away from his chest and met his gaze.

  “I wasn’t giving you away. Do you understand that? You’re mine, for this weekend.”

  Her heart lurched. “I thought you said—”

  “Don’t panic.”

  “I don’t panic,” she insisted.

  “You looked like you were going to panic.”

  “I don’t panic. I had someone’s brain almost fall out of their head and I didn’t panic.”

  “What the actual fuck…okay, we’re coming back to that. But first, we need to make something clear. You’re mine for this weekend, but you were bonded to Hach. That doesn’t just transfer over.”

  “You don’t want me as your sub long term.”

  “I do. But I also listened when you said you have trouble ending relationships. I want you to know you can end this. I want you to feel…safe and cared for.”

  Her heart lurched, and her lips started to tremble. No one had ever made her feel so special. No one had ever cared for her, listened to her, the way he did.

  “After this weekend, we’re starting over. I’ll ask you if you want to be my sub next time we’re both at the club. Or you can ask me. I’m a feminist like that. We take it weekend by weekend.”

  “Thank you,” she whispered. “For listening. For caring.”

  He cupped her cheek. “You deserve better than me, but I’m selfish enough that even though I know that, I still want to be with you.”

  “I don’t know why you keep saying that. You’re what I want. Who I want.” She wiped her eyes. “If you’d told me on Friday morning that I’d feel this way about a man I’d never met, that everything would change in just two days, I wouldn’t have believed you.”

  “That’s why we’re taking it slow.”

  Sejal kissed the inside of his wrist. There weren’t enough words to explain how much he meant to her. They stayed that way, safe and content in one another’s arms.

  Sejal was emotionally exhausted, and drifting to sleep when a horrible thought occurred to her. She sat up.

  Cort had his head back against the wall, and his eyes were closed. He opened one eye. “You okay?”

  “You won’t start being…gentle or anything, right?”

  He blinked then laughed. Sejal realized how that had sounded and waved one hand in the air. “You understand what I’m asking, don’t you?”

  “You want to make sure I’m still going to fuck you rough, spank you until it hurts to even breathe, and do unspeakable things to your nipples and clit?”

  Her blood started to heat as he spoke, and his cock was swelling against her hip. “Yes. That.”

  “Oh yes, I’m going to do all that, and more. Since you were a very bad girl and wouldn’t let yourself be the center of a gang bang, I guess we’ll just have to replicate the experience.”

  Sejal swallowed. “Yes, Master.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “And since you’re the detail person, I want you to go get everything we’ll need for a good mock gang bang. Dildos, plugs, straps…oh and an inflatable cock gag if you can find one.”

  “I thought we were done with the game, Master?” She slid from his lap and got to her feet. She went over to the small chest he’d had things stashed in and started inventorying the contents.

  “We’re done with the overseers’ game. It’s time to play our own. I was thinking maybe we should do our own version of the game. Start with A and try to do all of them.”

  She paused, cuff in hand. “Every item on the checklist?”

  “Every one.”

  “That might take…a long time.”

  “It might. It might take years.” He said the last part softly, and it was almost a question.

  “It might,” she agreed.

  He smiled and then pulled his shirt off.

  Sejal sighed happily and went to find a fresh tube of lube.

  15

  “Sejal.”

  She turned, bracing herself as Hach walked up to her. He was dressed in a suit and tie, the keys to his black luxury sedan in his hand.

  She’d just placed the bag containing her soiled lingerie into her trunk. She’d take it home and wash it. Cort had seemed particularly appreciative of the satin panties, so she’d have to see if she could buy some more.

  “How are you?” Hach asked carefully.

  “I’m well, and you?”

  He searched her face. “This is just a game.”

  “I don’t think it is. I don’t think we’re a good fit anymore.” She wished she could say something stronger—make a more declarative statement. Though at work she unflinchingly gave orders in relationships she couldn’t muster that same confidence. If Cort hadn’t opened the door by starting the conversation, she doubted she would have been able to tell Hach it was over on her own. Without the game, without Cort, she might have stayed with Hach forever, giving him what he needed at the expense of her own desires.

  Hach’s shoulder’s sagged and he bowed slightly from the waist. “Of course. Please accept my apologies if I hurt you.”

  They’d shared so much, been though so much together, that it felt odd to end it this way. Though she wasn’t normally a hugger, she went to Hach, wrapping her arms around him. He kissed the top of her head.

  “Without you, I never would have discovered this lifestyle.”

  “Thank you, for helping me,” Hach said.

  “And how are you?” she asked, genuinely curious how he’d handled being a true submissive.

  Hach shook his head once. “I am not sure what I want. What I will be in the future. I have agreed to…submit…to Khan for the next month.”

  “I hope you find what you want.” She meant every word.

  “I have the same hope for you.” Hach was looking at something over her head. He released her and stepped back.

  Cort walked up and slid one arm possessively around Sejal. He bent and kissed her on the mouth his tongue swiping over the seam of her lips. When he pulled back she was breathless. Hach was climbing into his car.

  “Was that entirely necessary?” she asked.

  “Necessary? No. But you’re very kissable.”

  “Kissable? I have never been described that way before.”

  Cort pressed her against the back of her own car, pinning her in place. “Next weekend?”

  “I’m at a conference. The weekend after?”

  “It’s a date.”

  “A date.”

  Cort frowned down at her. “Or not… You seem unsure.” He stepped back, giving her space. “If you don’t want—

  “A date. I like that. But there is one thing I’d like to clarify. If we’re going to continue to have sex, then if you have outside partners I must insist that you be tested before each visit.”

  “Ah, I get it.” He crowded her again. “I don’t double dip.”

  Sejal raised her eyebrows.

  “If I’m in a vanilla relationship I don’t come here. I’m not seeing anyone. Well, except you, since we have a date for not-next-weekend-but-the-weekend-after.”

  “I’m not seeing anyone outside of here either.”

  “Then that settled. For as long as we’re together, we’re together. Just us.”

  His lips hovered over hers, and his breath smelled minty. She wanted to hitch herself up to sit in the trunk of her Audi, and keep kissing him. She was closer to 40 than 30, and it was beyond absurd that she wanted to make out with him like a teenager from an angsty American TV show.

  “I have to go,” she said.

  He stepped back. “Don
’t let anyone’s brain fall out.” He walked around and opened the driver’s side door for her. “I’ll see you in a couple weeks.”

  Sejal put one hand on his shoulder and pulled herself up so she could kiss him before sliding into the car. He closed the door, then leaned down and blew her a kiss through the window. She smiled, happiness bubbling inside her. Cort stepped back and she put the car in gear.

  She knew this wouldn’t last long—a month or two at most. She’d make the best of it, and maybe when it was over she’d know more about what she wanted and needed.

  Epilogue

  “Is, uh, this seat taken?”

  Sejal looked up from the journal she had propped against her water bottle. Afternoon light streamed in through the floor to ceiling windows of the hospital cafeteria. There was a doctors-only lunchroom, but it didn’t have as much light so she’d opted for a small table up against the windows, letting the sounds of the busy hospital act as white noise as she ate.

  Cort stood at her table holding a banana and a cup of coffee.

  She blinked, and then blinked again, sure it was just a good-looking dark-haired man and that her brain, in a fit of wishful thinking, had decided was the man she’d been sleeping with and submitting to for nearly a year. The man she was not-so-secretly in love with.

  Cort shifted his weight from foot to foot. “If you’re busy I’ll just…”

  That was Cort’s voice. Her master’s voice, except she didn’t have a master right now. Right now she was Dr. Barsar, not Sejal the submissive.

  He crossed his arms, the muscles of his arms and shoulders straining his shirt in an oh-so-familiar way.

  He was really here.

  “No,” she said slowly. “It’s not taken.”

  He sat, looking a little uncomfortable. He wore a crisp white button down shirt, gray slacks, and a black belt. He had a badge clipped to his shirt. She leaned forward to read it. “Intern?”

  He was an intern at the hospital?

  “Um, yea. In the psychiatry department.” He shrugged, looking uncomfortable and perhaps embarrassed. “About a year ago this really smart woman I know told me I might be a good therapist. I started researching, and applied for some programs. I actually got in to one. I’m in my first semester of my masters program. We have to intern, and I decided to try interning at a hospital. I think that’s where I want to work.”