by Mary Monroe
Reverend Tiggs coughed before speaking again, ignoring a hen that had come in with him, nibbling at his pants leg. “Look-a-here, yall. Sister Ruby, Sister Hattie, Sister Mo’reen. I come here to invite yall to the midnight revival service we fixin to have tonight.”
Ruby and Hattie looked at one another.
“We got Brother No Talk on the piano this evenin. We got Brother Slim comin all the way from Miami to read the scriptures out loud. Sister Ruby, you the only grace missin. My congregation would sho nuff appreciate hearin some of your hymns. Ain’t a sister in Florida can swoon like Sister Ruby, Sister Hattie,” the preacher declared with a broad smile.
“Oh you go on, Reverend Tiggs,” Ruby grinned, shaking her head. “I got a unfair advantage. Me bein so sanctified and all. I been walkin in God’s yard all my life. Growin up a preacher’s daughter and all.”
“Praise the Lord,” Hattie said in a loud voice.
“A man without the spirit is worse off than a Jew lost in a A’rab town,” Ruby continued, shaking her head vigorously.
“Then you will join us tonight?” the preacher asked again.
“Why, Reverend Tiggs, I’ll be there with bells on,” Ruby promised.
“I’ll be there too, Reverend,” Hattie added. “Lord knows I am in need of spiritual guidance. I been in the storm too long! Wet and whiplashed by the devil’s rain!”
“Amen, Sister!” Reverend Tiggs shouted, standing and leaping once into the air. Le Pig became frightened and ran out of the room.
“I had drifted away from the church back in Baton Rouge. Took up with all kinds of mens. Gamblers. Thieves. Foreigners. I suspect the Lord won’t send me no husband until I cleanse my soul,” Hattie said, rising. Like the preacher, she leaped once into the air, returning to the floor with a loud thud.
Maureen got off the sofa and leaped once into the air.
“Yall want me to tell Reverend Tiggs about that bill collector Mama Ruby shot at this mornin?” she said, looking from Hattie to Ruby. Ruby quickly gave her a stern look while Hattie gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. Reverend Tiggs was looking at Maureen with his mouth hanging open and his hand shading his eyes.
“Mo’reen, you mustn’t tell tales in front of our preacher,” Ruby gently scolded. She smiled and shook her finger at Maureen.
“But you did shoot at him. A white man. You said he was nothin but the devil. But it wasn’t the devil—it was that same white man what come all the time from that store in Miami. Don’t you remember? You shot at him. You let me keep the shotgun shells,” Maureen insisted. “You said—”
“Mo’reen been delirious with her measles today,” Hattie explained, cutting her off in midsentence. “Now what time you want us at the church this evenin?” Hattie folded her arms and tilted her head to the side, smiling at the preacher, who was still staring at Maureen.
Though he was sincere where the Lord was concerned, he was a gullible, naive man who was easily led. He heard rumors about Ruby, but he had always wholeheartedly believed her wild lies about jealous people trying to blacken her good name. Ruby, an avid churchgoer and a dependable choir member, gave Reverend Tiggs the impression that she was nothing more than a loving mother and a Christian.
“Reverend Tiggs, you don’t believe I shot at no bill collector, do you? I ain’t got nothin against nobody. . . .” Ruby’s eyes blinked rapidly as she faced the preacher.
Reverend Tiggs turned slowly to face her. “Huh? Oh no—I don’t . . . I don’t believe you’d do nothin like that, Sister Ruby.” He turned to Hattie. “I want yall to be at the church around ten, if it won’t be no trouble. I’d like yall there early on account of I’d like to piece together some kind of agenda. With Brother Slim comin all the way from Miami and all,” he said, moving toward the door. Ruby walked along with him humming a spiritual.
“Then we’ll see you tonight.” Ruby suddenly rushed the man on out the door so fast she caught the tail of his shirt in it.
Hattie and Maureen ran to the door and stood next to Ruby. They all waved at the preacher and watched until he was far enough up the hill that he could no longer hear them.
“Cousin Ruby, what about Zeus’ fish fry tonight? Me and you been invited up there. Fast Black been in the kitchen scalin carps and cleanin catfish all day!” Hattie exclaimed.
Ruby bit her bottom lip and stared off into space. She had forgotten about the latest neighborhood gathering.
“Shoot! I had plumb forgot about Zeus and Fast Black puttin together a fish fry. And they was dependin on us to be there. I hear folks from everywhere comin!” Ruby let out her breath and shook her head. “Shoot!” She slapped her thigh and stomped her foot.
“What we goin to do? You just promised the reverend we would be at church tonight, Cousin Ruby.”
Ruby had to think for a minute.
“I promised him I’d sing. I don’t think he would mind so much if you didn’t come. I’ll tell him you couldn’t come after all, on account of you had to stay home with the cramps and arthritis and whatever else I can think of.” Ruby placed her hand on Maureen’s head and sighed heavily.
“I want to go to the fish fry.” Maureen laughed. “I want to see the grown folks fight.”
“You ain’t goin no place with the measles.” Ruby thumped Maureen’s head with her fingers. “And that’s for tellin the preacher about me shootin at that bill collector this mornin!”
Maureen backed away and left quietly, returning to the upper room.
Hattie and Ruby sauntered across the room and sat back down on the sofa. Both groaned and breathed deeply.
“What we goin to do?” Hattie asked, snatching her rolled newspaper and fanning herself again. Perspiration slid down the side of her face and dropped onto her bosom.
Ruby wiped her own sweat from her face with the tail of her dress.
“You go. To the fish fry I mean. I’ll go on to church. Later I might take a notion to come on over to Zeus’ after church,” Ruby replied.
17
Later that evening, while Hattie prepared herself for the fish fry, Ruby lay on the sofa eating from a bowl of pecans and drinking beer.
“Have a good time,” she called as Hattie rushed out the door wearing a loud orange silk dress and white heels. Her thick black hair was pulled back into a bun and pinned at the nape of her neck.
Zeus met Hattie at the door when she arrived.
“Come on in here, Sister!” he greeted her, all but snatching her off the front porch.
There was loud music coming from a record player in the center of the small living room and about three dozen people were crowded throughout the tiny house. A washtub filled with cracked ice and cans of beer sat in a corner. Fast Black and Yellow Jack were dancing together and causing quite a commotion.
“Come on, Hattie, let’s show these folks how to dance!” Zeus invited, grabbing Hattie by her hand. He wrestled with the big woman as they moved toward the center of the floor, for he was a frail man but had the agility of a teenager. His long, limp gray hair was wet with perspiration and matted to the back and sides of his head.
Hattie and Zeus attracted more attention than Fast Black and Yellow Jack. The crowd clapped and roared with laughter, egging them on. People in the back of the room had a hard time seeing the lively dancers. One man, a man with one arm, managed to plow through the knot of people and get close enough to see what was getting so much attention. When he spotted Hattie, he stood stock still. A few years earlier, he had had a vicious fight with a woman in a Miami bar, something his friends would never let him live down, for he was a man with a reputation, a man who had been feared most of his life, half of which he had spent in southern prisons.
After the fight that had cost him an arm, Mack Pruitt moved to Tampa, where he lived for two years trying to adjust to his dismemberment. He was still a reasonably attractive young man with a well-cared-for body. When not in jail, he drove cabs, waited tables, and did janitorial work, anything that would please his probation officer.
Mack had recently returned to Miami, where he finally got himself another woman whom he could call his own, a plain Cuban woman old enough to be his mother. Every time Mack looked at her he remembered Ruby. Ruby was the reason he now had to settle for so much less than he deserved. Ruby was the reason he lost the woman he had loved for ten years to a whole man. She had admitted that his lack of one arm repelled her.
Mack didn’t know who Ruby was, which is one of the reasons he had insulted her that night in Yocko’s. The fact that the woman had literally snatched off his arm should have told him she was no ordinary woman. Now, looking at Hattie and assuming she was Ruby, Mack was determined to kill her before the night was over.
He left the fish fry and went outside, where he hid behind a pear tree in front of the house. Other guests approaching the yard paid no attention to the man sitting on the ground with his back against the tree, staring off into the night with a .32 in his hand, waiting.
18
“Oh, Mama Ruby, where’s my pig?” Maureen yelled from the upper room. It was late, almost time for Ruby to get ready for church. She was still lounging on the sofa. A pack of breath mints lay on the coffee table next to seven empty beer cans.
“Virgil carried him outside to use the bathroom, lamb,” Ruby replied over her shoulder. The television was on, but Ruby was not watching it. Her mind was on the church service and Zeus’ fish fry. She hoped she would be out of church in time to catch the tail end of the gathering.
“Yall know I can’t get to sleep without my pig, Mama Ruby,” Maureen whined.
“I know, Mo’reen. Just get back in the bed. Virgil’s goin to bring the piggie to the upper room as soon as he gets through doin his business.” Before Ruby could say anything else, she heard a commotion outside; muffled screams and scuffling on her front porch. Then she heard what sounded like a firecracker going off.
“Now what in the world is that boy of mine up to now?” Ruby rose up from the sofa and turned to face the front door with her fist poised. “Virgil, come on in this house and stop actin the fool you is!” Ruby was surprised when Hattie snatched open the door and fell forward onto the living room floor.
“COUSIN RUBY—I BEEN SHOT IN MY BUTT!” Hattie cried. Ruby ran to her. The door was still open, and she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Mack standing on the porch with the gun in his hand.
Ruby was surprised to see Mack, but not nearly as surprised as he was to see her. The resemblance between Ruby and Hattie was uncanny. The man’s mind went blank as he lost control of his senses and started to babble incoherently, pointing from Ruby to Hattie.
Ruby stepped over Hattie as she lay on the floor, terrified but not seriously injured. The back of her dress had a small red stain where the bullet had brushed her body.
Virgil was walking up into the yard with Le Pig in one arm and a pitchfork in the other. After the pig had relieved himself, Virgil had covered the droppings with sand. This was a nightly chore Ruby had assigned him ever since Slim had presented Maureen with the pig.
One could expect just about anything to be happening with Ruby Montgomery. To approach her house and see her chasing a one-armed man off her front porch, and the body of a three-hundred-pound woman lying in the doorway, was really not so out of the ordinary. Virgil said nothing, but continued to walk, whistling. He stepped aside as the man darted past him. Virgil saw the man had a gun in his hand. This caused Virgil to stop, looking from the man to Ruby.
“I don’t know who you is, Mister, but I’d rather be in hell than where you is right now,” Virgil said in a low voice. Ruby, running past, snatched the pitchfork out of Virgil’s hand, knocking him to the ground. Virgil dropped the pig and it ran squealing into the woods. He stood up and watched as Ruby caught up with her prey just as he was about to run up the hill. She plunged the pitchfork into his back with so much force the prongs went completely through his body and stuck out his chest.
“Great balls of fire,” Virgil mumbled. He shook his head and blinked, not knowing if what he had just witnessed was real. He sighed and shook his head again, walking swiftly over to Ruby. He put his arm around her shoulder and they both watched Mack stumble and fall on his side, landing clumsily in a lifeless heap.
Ruby cleansed Hattie’s wound and covered it with witch hazel. Afterward, Hattie accompanied Ruby and Virgil deep into the woods, where Ruby made Virgil drag Mack’s body by the feet, the weapon still sticking out.
Hattie stood next to Ruby. They both had their arms folded and their faces were grim. Hattie was breathing hard and every now and then she would utter a curse under her breath. Ruby hummed a spiritual. Virgil whistled as he dug a hole with a large shovel.
“Hold that lamp still, Mama Ruby. Shoot. I don’t want to shovel my foot out here in this bayou,” Virgil said angrily. “Shoot! I’m goin to up and join the army yet! I ain’t goin to be nowhere around when the law finally come to haul you away, Mama Ruby. This here is nineteen and sixty-one. Not eighteen and sixty-one and the wild west where folks was expected to kill up one another the way you do. One day somebody bigger and badder than you goin to come along. See what you do then.”
“Ain’t but one bigger and badder than me . . . and he in paradise settin on a gold throne, surrounded by angels, puttin stars next to my name and blessin me by the pound,” Ruby announced.
“Cousin Ruby, you is the dickens,” Hattie laughed.
Virgil stopped digging and wiped sweat from his forehead with his hand. He leaned on the shovel and looked in Ruby’s face.
“Cousin Hattie, don’t laugh. Mama Ruby believe all that madness. Ain’t no God goin to put up with nobody killin folks the way she do. Come judgment day God goin to need half his angels just to tell him all the devilment Mama Ruby done done.”
“Boy, I got the strength of a nation . . . and just as much nerve!” Ruby exclaimed.
“Amen!” Hattie yelled, waving her hand in the air.
“I got A-one credit in heaven. I got a telephone in my heart with a direct line to my savior. I got the wisdom of a Jew. I got the glory of a saint. How can you stand there and fix your lips to low-rate me so, boy?” Ruby growled, waving the lamp about.
“Shet up, Mama Ruby, and just hold that lamp still. Shoot. I want to get to the church on time.” Virgil started to shovel again.
Ruby gave Virgil a stern look and turned to Hattie.
“How was the fish fry, Cousin Hattie?”
“It was fine. I was just comin home to change me into a more comfortable pair of shoes when that one-arm devil got after me,” Hattie sighed.
“He won’t molest another woman,” Ruby grunted, touching the corpse with her bare foot. “Hurry up, Virgil! Finish diggin that hole. You know I got Fast Black comin to the house to help me clean my teeth with that Ajax Zeus picked up in Miami. I want to look my best for the Lord.”
Virgil stopped and turned to Ruby again with a smile on his face.
“Fast Black comin to the house, sho nuff? She comin by herself?” he asked.
“I ain’t goin to mention it, but I heard Fast Black tell Zeus she was a fool over you. She don’t really care nothin for No Talk,” Hattie teased.
Virgil whistled and began to dig fast and vigorously.
“Dig deeper, boy!” Ruby repeated firmly. “You remember what happened that time you dug that shallow grave for that half-breed from the panhandle what was down here in Goons causin trouble.” Ruby paused and turned to Hattie. “Some half-breed bastard come down here messin around with our women and beatin up on our men. Even had Loomis scared. Yellow Jack come to get me. I crawled out my bed, on account of Fast Black told Yellow Jack she would give me some rock candy to come to the house. Now I ain’t knowed about this half-breed down the camp raisin so much hell. When I got there, there was Loomis sittin on the back porch with his nose broke. There was No Talk settin in the livin room with a scab already formed on his lip. There was Boatwright cryin the blues cause the half-breed won’t pay for drinkin up his liquor. And ther
e was Fast Black with a black eye where this punk done went up side her head.”
“What you do?” Hattie asked anxiously.
“She bit off his nose then snapped his back,” Virgil said, still shoveling.
“I declare!” Hattie hollered. “And then what happened when you buried him?”
“Well, this happened when Mo’reen was a itty-bitty baby. Three. One day she come runnin in the house playin with a skull. The chickens had scratched up that half-breed’s bones!” Ruby told Hattie.
“Have mercy,” Hattie gasped. A chill passed through her body.
After the burial, Fast Black came to the house and scrubbed Ruby’s teeth. Then she and Virgil escorted Ruby to church. They were eagerly greeted by the anxious Reverend Tiggs.
The service began. No Talk, with his bandaged neck, played the piano off-key and could not keep his eyes off Fast Black and Virgil sitting dangerously close together on a bench near the back of the small room.
“Say Mama Ruby sent another maniac to glory, huh?” Fast Black asked Virgil in a whisper. She had changed from her white party dress to a simple black smock and she had removed all traces of makeup from her face.
“Sho nuff did. I seen her do it with my own eyes. I swear to God, Fast Black, I’m gettin scared as hell livin with Mama Ruby. She my own mama and I’m scared to death of her.”
“Aw, Mama Ruby is a good woman. She don’t mess with nobody, lest they mess with her. You don’t mess with her you’ll never have nothin to worry about. Shoot. You can take my word for it, I never is goin to cross Mama Ruby. Shoot. I don’t want my tongue snatched out like that gambler from Tampa—”
“What gambler? What tongue got snatched out?! What you talkin about, girl?”
“Um . . . you didn’t know?”
Several annoyed church members gave the young couple stern glances, and loudly advised them to stop talking, as everyone present had come specifically to hear Ruby sing.